


Leather Pants And Paddles

by Moose_and_Destiel, the_trixster_and_the_fallen



Category: Supernatural, Supernatural AU
Genre: AU, Dean - Freeform, Destiel - Freeform, Enemies to Friends to Lovers, F/M, FWB, Friends With Benefits, M/M, Rockstar AU, Smut, alternative universe, cas
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-05-28
Updated: 2020-08-31
Packaged: 2021-03-03 03:47:53
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 20
Words: 114,325
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24418369
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Moose_and_Destiel/pseuds/Moose_and_Destiel, https://archiveofourown.org/users/the_trixster_and_the_fallen/pseuds/the_trixster_and_the_fallen
Summary: Famous rockstar Dean Winchester loves being in the spotlight. His world revolves around partying, drinking, sex, and a slew of adoring fans. He’s never had a true relationship in his life. Castiel, the newest bodyguard hired to look after Dean has never heard of him, and Dean gets on his last nerve. But slowly, Castiel begins to learn what all the fuss is about.
Relationships: Castiel/Dean Winchester, Dean Winchester/Lisa Braeden
Comments: 47
Kudos: 103





	1. The New Bodyguard

**Author's Note:**

> This is an RP inspired fic, hope you enjoy!
> 
> ***
> 
> This fic has been on hiatus for a while but we hope to return to it eventually. Thank you for your patience! 
> 
> ***

Today was Castiel’s first day on the security team for Dean Winchester. He tried to look his best, but something about him always looked disheveled. He wanted to make a good impression but in his almost too big clothes, bed fucked hair, and slightly lanky frame, he did not fit in with the rest of the clean-cut security guards in their trim clothes and smoothed hair.

His supervisor, Jo had been listing off the schedule for today, and Cas nodded along, doing his best to keep up. Tonight was the end of the first leg of Dean Winchester’s tour. He’d already traveled all over the country and tonight was a new city, a new arena full of screaming, adoring fans. With fame, came safety concerns. 

They were standing off to the side, the music from the warmup band obnoxiously loud. All he knew was he was going to be assigned a new client, Dean. He was supposed to be a high-profile celebrity but Cas had honestly never heard of him before.

“Hey, Dean! Come meet your new bodyguard,” Jo called out, startling Cas just a touch. He looked up as he heard Dean’s name, his eyes falling on a rather handsome man. Sharp features and piercing green eyes; he could suddenly see why there were so many adoring fangirls lined up outside.

Deans’ eyes widened a little upon seeing him, but Cas tried not to take it personally. Surely, he was not at all like the buff, intimidating men Dean was used to.

“You’re...my new bodyguard?” Dean asked, raising an eyebrow in skepticism.

Cas squared his shoulders and stood a little taller. Despite this, he was still a good few inches shorter than Dean, but he refused to let that deter him. "Yes. I am. Best of my graduating class." He answered with a sense of confidence.

“Uh-huh.” Dean folded his arms, rocking slightly on his heels, seemingly giving Jo a look of disbelief before asking with a tone of menace; “Am I being pranked? Real funny. My security’s not a joke, you know. These fans out there? They’re vicious. I’ve been hurt before. Grabbed, clawed, bitten, you name it.”

Cas narrowed his eyes. Apparently, Dean was a sassy little bitch too. Cas set his jaw, "I am your new security detail, if you have a problem with it-.' He challenged, standing up for himself. He wasn’t going to let some hotshot treat him like shit when he could easily knock him flat without issue.

"Ignore him, Dean. I promise, he really is good and he will be a great addition to your team." Jo cut Cas off with a warning glare.

Dean chuckled. “Alright, alright. I’ll give you a shot. You can help pick up all the stray panties thrown on stage after the show.” He smirked. “Then, if you’re up for it, maybe you can handle the after-party.”

Cas rolled his eyes as the taller man strutted away, most likely to get set up for his first set. Cas caught his eyes falling to Dean’s ass, but he just told himself it was the ridiculously tight leather pants that briefly caught his attention.

He was pulled away to meet the other security detail, most of which were for the general safety of the venue as Dean preferred to keep a low profile.

As Dean went through the mic check, Cas was rounded outback with some of the other newbies to watch the performance. 

Dean slung the strap of his electric guitar over his shoulder and stood center stage, his head down as the lights slowly went up and the crowd began to scream.

He played the opening notes to his first song, his most popular hit, and let himself go.

When it finished, he raised his arms up, soaking in all the applause before he yelled into the microphone. “Hello, New York City! How are we feeling tonight? You’re all looking damn sexy!”

As much as Cas hated to admit it, Dean really was a natural performer. Tall, sexy and had incredible charm. And he looked so passionate when playing. No wonder this stadium was filled with adoring fans screaming his name.

Dean stepped off the stage for a breather after a few songs so the crew could do a set change. He walked back to his dressing room, chugging down half a bottle of water, then dumping a little on his face and bare chest. He’d torn his shirt off halfway through the third song. It was his signature move.

And the leather pants were his signature look, but he was sweating like crazy in them under all the harsh lights. He found Cas watching him from backstage and walked over to him with a small smirk. He’d found his next poor soul to pick on.

“So, what’d ya think? Can you handle all this?”

Cas' attention was caught when Dean was strutting over, the stupid smirk on his face. Ugh, Cas wanted to smack it off. Cocky bastard.

"This job is not going to be any more complex than my last job." Cas stated, "do I need to accompany you to put a shirt on, or do you think you can handle it without security detail?"

Dean rolled his eyes before speaking yet again, ignoring the rebellious lip Cas had just given him.

“What was your last job?” Dean asked as he grabbed a faded loose muscle tee and slipped it on. The armholes were cut low enough to hang beneath his ribcage. Not that Cas noticed.

"Security detail for Ball Park Music. I toured with them in North America for about 2 years." He stated,, tucking his hands behind his back and standing at attention by Dean’s door. He wasn’t looking at Dean but instead dartEd around the rather lush dressing room curiously.

“So why’d you leave then? Were you not good enough?” Dean chuckled. Cas could feel him starting to wedge himself under his skin. Fuck. Dean was going to drive him insane.

“Winchester! Get your ass on that stage! Now.” His manager called out, interrupting them both.

“Well, we’ll finish this little chat later.” He smirked, running back to get ready for the second half of the show.

He followed Dean with a huff, and it took every ounce of willpower not to trip the cocky bastard. He stopped a few feet back from the stage, to keep guard and linger in the shadows but the heavy velvet curtains, watching as Dean started up his next set of songs, playing and singing his heart out.

Another eruption of screaming adoration for him must have been like music to Dean’s ears and he drank it up, letting every cheer for straight to his ego, and Cas could see the little smug smile on his lips from there.

With the last song to go, things started to get crazy. A fan in the front row that’d had a little too much to drink ran up and threw herself onto the stage, grabbing wildly at Dean. Cas was on full alert and the second the tipsy female stumbled up on stage, he swooped in and placed himself between then. As much as he would have liked to pick her up, as it would have been easier, it would’ve drawn too much attention.

He managed to usher her off the stage, his gaze piercing as he dared her to try anything. Once he’d gotten her backstage, one of the other security guards escorted her outside. Now that she was taken care of, he turned his attention to the rockstar who brushed the situation off with ease, raising the mic to his lips. 

“Holy shit. Buy me a drink first, am I right?” He chuckled, smoothly transitioning into his final song.

The line was cheesy but somehow he’d managed to pull it off without looking like an unbearable ass hat, which was probably why he was so adored.

As the last note was played, Dean walked off the stage, a wide grin on his face as the crowd continued to scream for him long after he’d left.

“Good job handling that,” he said to Cas. He had a few minutes before he’d inevitably return for his encore as most singers did. Cas bobbed his head, following behind the rockstar. He had the schedule in his mind although, with celebrities, it was ever-changing, so he would do his best to be patient with Dean. Hopefully, this was the worst of him.

Dean ran back onstage, leaving Cas to the side once the crowd couldn’t take it anymore and did three more songs before he left again. Dean sought him out and he grabbed another water bottle, drinking it down. Luckily, the last final songs had gone smoothly. “So, I realized I never caught your name.”

Cas looked over a very sweaty Dean, taking a touch too long to respond. "Castiel. But you can call me Cas." He answered, "You said there was an afterparty you would like to attend?" He bridged the conversation back to work.

“Alright, Castiel.” Dean chuckled, although he didn’t seem to question the oddity of his name. “To attend? Oh, no. I throw the party. In my dressing room, with a select group of VIP fans. And it always gets...a little rowdy.”

"Seriously? In your dressing room?" Cas asked, now clearly unimpressed. Surely he was now going to be stuck as security detail to either a bunch of strippers or some kind of drug-fucked orgy.

“Yeah. I do it every night of the tour. Could you grab the champagne from the fridge? The ladies will be here any minute now and I gotta change.” Dean patted Cas’ shoulder patronizingly and headed off to his room.

“I’m not your lackey, Dean; get one of your assistants to do that. I’m here to protect you, not get you champagne,” he reiterated, keeping his eyes averted as Dean undressed from his leather pants. "I will be outside the door. Call out if you accidentally asphyxiate yourself and I  _ might _ come help."

Dean changed into a pair of acid wash jeans and slid a leather jacket on over the t-shirt. “Alright, fun police.” He called one of the assistants over to get the party supplies and went to greet his fans as the room was set up.

Cas kept a fair distance between him and Dean, his eyes on the guests. He made note of each one, mostly so if Dean was murdered he would be able to give an apt description of each girl to the police.

Dean led each one back to the dressing room and Cas stood guard outside, although he could hear them through the thin wood of the door. He knew how these parties tended to go and sooner or later he would be peeling Dean off the dressing room floor and dumping him in his tour van.

Hours later, the girls were escorted out of the room and given transportation to wherever they needed to go. And Dean lay sprawled out on the couch, passed out naked. According to the rumors, every concert ended this way, but no one ever complained as his concerts brought in so much money. Dean was free to do practically whatever he wanted. And he lived the true rockstar life. Drinking, sex, drugs, partying.

The lights were always left off every party, Dean’s own idea to protect himself from anything accidentally leaking online. Cas counted each girl and made sure they each got to their cabs safely. He found himself in Deans dressing room, the room thick with the smell of sex and alcohol. He let out a sigh and nudged Dean, wondering if he was truly out or just coked off his tits.

Dean let out an incoherent grumble, rolling haphazardly onto his stomach and drooling onto the couch. Cas sighed yet again, squinting through the darkness at Dean. He reached down to pick him up when he saw, well felt, that Dean was naked.

His breath hitched and he felt a flush of raw embarrassment. Cas was young. Ish. He hadn’t seen a guy, naked before. Except for the occasional curious exploration on pornhub.

He threw a blanket over Dean's waist and hoisted him up with a soft grunt, making his way to the tour bus. Dean slumped over in Cas’ arms, far too out of it to protest or fight him.

Maybe he was in over his head with this one. 


	2. Mile High Club

Dean woke up the next morning on the bed of his tour bus, experiencing a bitch of a hangover, but it was the same every morning. He found a bottle of over-the-counter painkillers by his bedside and swallowed two of them with a sip of water, then pulled on a pair of sunglasses and sat up. He didn’t know who brought him back to the bus. He never did. But the blanket was warm and he was shivering, still naked and the air conditioning had been turned on. He wrapped it around himself and stumbled out of bed, searching for his clothes.

Dean stumbled around, slipping into the tiny bathroom and cranking on the water so he could shower. He removed his sunglasses and the blanket, keeping his eyes shut as he let the warm water run down his back and chest. That soothed his headache a little.

A whole thirty minutes later, he slipped out of the shower and a towel around his waist then blow-dried his hair before making his way back to the main part of the tour bus. He found his new friend on one of the other beds and waved. “Didn’t make it to the hotel last night? Someone was up late,” he admonished, clicking his tongue.

Cas squinted at him sleepily, clearly unimpressed at being woken up. He sleepily drew himself to his feet. "I had to stand guard and someone wasn't out until well past 3 am," Cas grunted, smoothing his hair down as he tried not to look at the half-naked Dean. "Your clothes are next to your bed.'

Cas had managed to gather Dean’s clothes and stored them on the shelf, the young bodyguard tucked away, sleeping on one of the spare beds. He had to stay close to Dean and considering he didn't go to the hotel, he ended up sleeping on the cramped bus.

“Well shit, Cas. Why’d you let me stay up so late? I have a plane to catch this morning.” He grabbed his phone that was miraculously still in the pocket of his jeans and checked the time. They had about an hour before they needed to leave, so he wasn’t going to get yelled at, yet. He haphazardly tossed his towel onto his bed and tugged on his clothes from the night before.

“C’mon, we gotta get to the hotel. All my shit’s in my room and there’s no way in hell I’m wearing this on the plane.”

"What was I supposed to do? Drag you out while some girl was blowing you? I don't wanna see that." Cas rolled his eyes and grabbed his jacket. He messages the security liaison, telling him that he was with Dean and they were on their way. He made his way out of the van and to the curb to call a cab, standing to the side as he waited for Dean to join him. 

Dean hurried off the tour bus. He wouldn’t be seeing it for a while as they were off to Europe for the second half of the tour, so he lightly patted the side where the initials DW were painted in a large font. 

He made a disgusted face about having to ride in a cab but didn’t say anything about it the short ride to the hotel. He couldn’t get out fast enough and he ran inside and up the elevator to his room on the top floor. “I assume you’ve got the key?” He asked Cas.

Cas followed him close behind, giving him an exasperated look. "Of course not. I am not your assistant." He reiterated with a flare of nostrils. "Move." He waved Dean's hands away from the door, pulling a small kit from his pocket. He bent down and worked on the lock and after a brief minute, it clicked and he pushed it open. He sauntered down the stairs to where the other security was staying and grabbed his duffel. He wouldn't have time to sleep or shower or even eat, but he would try to catch up on the flight.

“Wow.” Dean couldn’t hide how impressed he was that Cas could pick the lock, especially one as secure as a hotel room. He let out a low whistle as he walked inside. The bathroom to the side had a large tub and a nice shower. The bedroom had a flat-screen TV that almost took up the entire back wall, a king-sized bed decorated with seemingly hundreds of throw pillows, and a perfect view of the city skyline from the window.

Damn, it was a shame he didn’t get to sleep there. So maybe he’d take a few minutes. He plopped down on the bed and sprawled out, closing his eyes. Maybe he should start throwing his parties in the hotel rooms instead. Of course, the damage deposit would go out the window, but that kinda money was nothing to him.

After about ten minutes of blissful silence, he forced himself out of bed before the dark-haired, blue-eyed man came to angrily knock on his door and rush him out. Cas seemed to have a real stick up his ass. A lot of rages pent up inside him for a shorter guy. He wasn’t actually that short, just shy of six feet by his estimate, but Dean was still taller, and he’d use that to his advantage.

Rifling through his suitcase, Dean undressed and changed into a pair of gray leggings and a white long t-shirt that hung to his knees to cover up his lack of underwear. He liked to be comfortable on planes. He slipped on a pair of athletic sneakers to go with it, and a baseball cap and sunglasses then zipped up his suitcase and wheeled it to the elevator. The rest of his team was already in the lobby, waiting for further instructions.

Luckily, they made it just in time. Cas looked worn out and very annoyed, a low huff on his lips as he moved to stand next to the other security detail. They would be taking a private jet, which wasn't uncommon for Dean’s stature.

When Cas arrived, Jo spotted him and pulled him aside. "I have noticed since last night the rather, crude and unprofessional way you speak to Dean. Remember that he is your employer, and speaking to him in such a way can get you terminated from your position. One word from him and you are finished in this industry, do you understand? If he asks you to get on your knees and scrub the damn floor, you are to obey him." 

Cas sighed. "Yes, Jo. Of course." 

"Good." She moved to speak up to the band and security, "We will be taking a limo to the airport. Rockstar’s in there, security detail in a transport van following close behind."

Dean knew the drill by then. He walked over to the fruit water dispenser in the hotel lobby and filled an empty plastic water bottle with it, then took a sip. “Mm. Alright, I’m ready to go.”

He let himself be escorted out of the hotel by his team, his suitcase taken from him, and loaded into the trunk of the limousine.

“Wait, Can I get Castiel in the limo with me? I’d feel much more secure that way.” He smirked to himself as the driver opened the door for him and he slid into the long, black leather seat.

Cas was following close behind, his eyes falling to Jo as if begging for help so he could avoid being with Dean but she ignored him. "Of course, Dean. Call if you need anything." She answered smoothly, moving to load in the other security detail.

Cas grumbled a little, putting his duffle bag in the trunk and climbing in to sit opposing Dean. He had never been in a Limo before but didn't want to make a big deal of it.

“Why’re you grumpy? A limo’s much nicer than that security van. You’re welcome.”

The driver shut both doors and pulled up the partition, starting off toward the airport.

Dean grabbed a handful of M&Ms from a small glass bowl in one of the cup holders, glancing out the window.

"I am tired," Cas answered in the politest way he can think of, but all he wanted to do was curl up on the leather seat and pass out.

His eyes fell out the tinted window and all he could do was pray this ride would be peaceful.

“Alright, yeesh. You can nap on the plane. It’s a nine-hour flight.” He clearly didn’t seem to be in the mood for talking, and even Dean could take the hint.

They spent the rest of the ride in silence, Dean taking full advantage of all the snacks. But he didn’t touch the wine. He was still pretty hungover from the night before and he knew there’d be more tonight.

Cas was half asleep, trying to stay alert but with the silence and the smooth ride, he was in and out. The guard was exhausted from the late night and he had a feeling it would be like this the entire tour.

The limo soon pulled up to the airport where his plane was waiting and Dean perked up. He was terrified of flying so over the years, his team had made a few...accommodations for him so he’d look forward to it instead.

Cas climbed out of the car, his luggage hauled in with Deans as they made their way through security and customs with no issues. They reached the plane, Cas moving up the stairs to have a look for anything unusual or out of place but it seemed to be clear, so everyone was allowed on board. Cas made a beeline for a seat with the other security up the back, hoping to get a wink of sleep.

“You’re not gonna sit with me?” Dean asked, pouting in disappointment as he was led to his fully-reclining seat in the center of the plane, sectioned off by a small curtain.

Cas internally cried. He just wanted to go hide and sleep. "If you wish for me to sit with you, I can." Cas stopped in his tracks, glancing at Dean as the other security bypassed to their seats.

“Don’t look so sad. There’s a curtain. You’ll be able to sleep all you want.” Dean winked at him, settling into his seat and taking the two Xanax left for him, then pulled the curtain up between them and closed his eyes, trying to mentally prepare himself for takeoff.

“Hiya, handsome. Can I getcha anything?” A dark-haired flight attendant asked, walking over to his seat.

“Lisa, hey! Perfect timing. I’ll have my usual.”

Dean bit his lip, glancing at her as she covered his lap with a plush blanket and sank to her knees in front of him. He’d almost forgotten entirely that they were thousands of feet up in the air and he started to moan. 

Cas was in a light rest when he heard Dean moan. He felt every part of his body become very alert and sensitive, goosebumps ridging along his arms.

_ What was Dean-  _ Cas sat up a little, the light curtain making it very obvious Dean was receiving a sexual favor from the flight attendant.

Cas felt his heart rate speed up and his pants constrict a little. _ Fuck, _ Dean was attractive, it would be stupid to deny that but getting hard listening to Dean moan, surely that was very unprofessional.

Dean smirked to himself, knowing Cas could hear him and wondering how he was handling it. He still just wanted to get under his skin, make life as difficult as possible for him.

When she finished him off, she climbed up onto his lap and he ‘accidentally’ swatted at the curtain with his arm while wrapping it around her waist. “Thank you,” he murmured to her, unbuttoning her top.

“Always a pleasure, Dean.”

He’d joined the mile high club ages ago, and now he was just racking up loyalty rewards. He started to moan again, his head falling back on the seat.

Cas' eyes open, trying so hard to distract himself but he made it so hard to ignore. His moans were so loud and Cas wanted to ignore it. So badly, but he couldn't. And it was harder to ignore when the curtain opened just a touch. He didn't want to watch, but he couldn’t turn his head away. 

Dean clung to her, letting out a final cry in ecstasy before she climbed off of him and adjusted herself.

He pulled the curtain back fully, securing the blanket around his lap as he looked over at Cas. Cas jumped a little as the curtain was pulled back like he had his hand caught in a cookie jar. He tried to act natural but he had to adjust himself a little so it wasn't obvious he was rock hard.

“Oh, hey. I hope we didn’t disturb ya. This is Lisa, my flight attendant. You wanna show him your tits, babe? I paid for ‘em.”

She scowled at Dean and smacked his shoulder, buttoning up her top. “Enough.” 

“She’s a little shy,” he whispered to Cas. 

Lisa had been hired strictly to be his flight attendant, but Dean had taken to her quite well, and she’d agreed to serve him because well...he was Dean and it wasn’t every day she got to sleep with a celebrity. His security team didn’t care because at least it stopped the panic attacks he used to have during takeoff each flight, and they’d learned to use headphones to drown out the noise.

"If you don't mind, I would like to sleep. I don't have to see your breasts." He told her. 

“He’s just grumpy,” Dean explained, pouting a little as she got up and adjusted her uniform. “Hey, where ya going?”

“You need sleep, Mister.” She poked his nose with her index finger. “I’m too distracting for you. And I think your new friend wants some peace and quiet as well.”

“Friend? He’s my security guard, he-”

She put her finger to his lips. “Sleep.” Giving him a flirty wave, she walked to the back of the plane.

Dean grumbled, affixing the curtains back around himself and trying to get comfortable.

Cas' aching erection was pressing up against his pants and he knew he wasn't going to sleep now. He grumbles and pulls out his phone, praying that the ache would go away.

Dean looked out the window, worn out completely from his long night, the Xanax, and the sex. He soon passed out in his seat, covering his face with the back of his arm and snoring slightly.

Luckily, Cas heard the snores and knew Dean was out. He managed to sneak off to the bathroom to relieve himself, absolutely exhausted, then dragged his way back to the plane seat and fell asleep, curled up and peaceful.


	3. London

Dean was woken up by his team when the plane landed and he groggily let himself be escorted out and taken to limo so they could head to his new hotel. Once again, he requested that Cas ride with him. Due to the time difference, it was an extremely tight schedule and he’d have to be ready to perform soon.

Cas was now much livelier, having managed to take a quick sink shower and freshen himself up before they landed. He was walking a few feet behind Dean and was once again, asked to join Dean in the limo. When they were settled, Cas raised his eyebrows. "Expecting to get attacked in the car, or did you have an ulterior motive for having me sit with you?" He asked.

“Never hurts to be prepared.” Dean shrugged, responding nonchalantly. “Besides, you should be thanking me. You’re getting to sit in the limo and the nice part of the plane instead of with the rest of your coworkers. I’m spoiling you.”

Cas gave Dean a sarcastic look before he responded in his professional manner. "Thank you, Dean." He almost bit his own tongue as he said it. But this was the reason he didn’t last long as most jobs. He was short-tempered and rude, usually giving lip to cocky celebrities. But if he wanted to keep this job, he had to learn.

“You’re welcome.” Dean grinned. “I can get you anything you want, you know. Or I can just get you fired. So be nice to me.” He kicked his legs up onto the long seat, relaxing, and his tone changed completely. “So, London, huh? Ready to get my Mick Jagger on,” he teased in the worst imitation of a British accent.

Cas tried not to laugh and give Dean the validation he craved. Cas wasn't going to let Dean charm him and string him along for fun. So instead, he redirected the attention back to the gig ahead. "How many times have you been to London?"

“A few. It’s a nice place. And the accents...my god.” He bit his lip. “They love Americans here. They think we’re so cute and stupid and dammit, it’s true. How about you?”

"Never,” he answered, his bright eyes falling on Dean. "I suppose there will be another party tonight? May I suggest somewhere less cramped?" 

“Yeah. I was thinking I should start moving ‘em to the hotel room. That way you don’t have to carry me anywhere when it’s over.” Dean chuckled. “But of course, that means you’re gonna have to stay and keep watch. The hotel’s a lot more private, so more security risks.”

"I stood watch last night while maintaining your privacy." He replied, praying Dean didn’t mean he would have to stand there inside the door and watch whatever drunken orgy was going to occur.

“Castiel, this is different. There are a whole lot more risks if I throw it in a hotel room. So many more safety hazards. You’ll have to be in the room with us. Or, I can tell Jo that you can’t handle being my security.”

"I can handle your security just fine," he answered firmly before letting out a soft sigh. "If you would feel safer, Dean, I can do that." 

Dean hid a sly smile. He knew he’d won. “I’d feel much safer. Thank you.”

***

He relaxed the rest of the way to the hotel. This was the last of his downtime before he had to get ready for the show.

Cas dreaded whatever nightmare Dean had in mind for him, knowing the show was going to be almost identical to the day before. He followed the usual procedures as they made their way into the hotel and each of their rooms assigned, receiving his own key to one of the double rooms downstairs. Luckily with an odd number of security, he was sleeping solo.

Dean was welcomed to another large, impressive room on the top floor of the hotel, his suitcase and things wheeled into his room for him and he got changed quickly, foregoing the comfort of his leggings and squeezing into his constricting leather pants and another low-cut muscle tee.

Cas met the crew down by the lobby, waiting for his transportation to the concert venue. Cas stood by Dean, assuming the invitation was still for him to ride with the rockstar until further notice. 

“You’re learning.” Dean chuckled, sliding into the limousine once again. He was pleased he didn’t have to even ask anymore. He stretched out as much as he could in his tight pants and slung his arm across the back of the seat.

Cas sat opposing him, trying not to look at Dean. It was like staring at an eclipse. Man, he needed to get laid. Maybe he might get some free time here and be able to sneak off. Luckily, even if he wasn't a fan of the female aesthetic, they were always attracted to him, so at least it wouldn't be hard to find someone. 

Dean cleared his throat, noting the way Cas seemed so uptight once again. “You know, I could get you your own flight attendant if you wanted. For the plane back. I can get you anything you want, Castiel. What’s your type? I’m gonna be honest here. I really can’t tell if you’re gay or not. But I started to think so after you didn’t wanna look at Lisa.”

“Im gay,” he answered plainly; there was no point in lying. It was fairly obvious that his attraction to women was non-existent. “But I occasionally fuck women.” He clarified. It wasn’t that he enjoyed it all that much, but it was a matter of convenience. He knew from the get-go that there would be no threat of romantic feelings or attachment from his part, so he could take care of what he needed to, then leave. 

Dean nodded. “Well, I can get you plenty of both.” He chuckled. “Not that I have to. You can walk into any bar and say you’re my security guard and people will throw themselves at you.” He smiled a little. “So you fuck people you’re not really attracted to? Seems like we’ve got more in common than I thought.”

Cas wasn’t all that surprised. Of course, Dean fucked anything with a pulse; the attraction wasn’t necessary. "I do not need assistance in finding sexual companions, thank you." 

“Oh, I know you don’t. But I’m still offering.” He leaned back in his seat. “Alright, so if it isn’t sex you want, then what is it? You can’t tell me all that’d make you happy is being security the rest of your life.”

Stuck looking out for assholes like Dean the rest of his life. What a nightmare. "My life is a simple one, Dean. To work. And this is what I like to do." 

“Alright, fair enough.” Dean didn’t fully believe him, but he didn’t want to interrogate him any further. And besides, they were almost there.

Once they arrived at the concert venue, a large stadium made to seat tens of thousands, he and the rest of the team were led up the back entrance toward the stage.

Cas followed behind, blending in as more of the hired security arrived. Luckily, being on Dean's personal team meant he didn’t have to hang around for the usual security drill of how a concert venue worked. He followed Dean, keeping a close eye on him.

Dean went through the motions of sound check and getting a feel for the stage. But this had become a routine by now. He was ready. And most stages were more or less the same. He went to his dressing room to get his makeup done and eat something since he’d realized how little he’d eaten all day, and that was never good before a performance. 

Cas stood guard just inside the door, the smell of food making him hungry. But he could always switch out with another guard and grab something to eat during Dean’s performance

“Hey, Castiel.” Dean smiled, finishing his catered burger and fries quickly, then walking over to him. “How many fans do you think you’re gonna have to wrestle off the stage tonight?” He asked with a smirk. The opening act had gone on, a band Dean hadn’t really talked to much through the tour.

Cas stood up a little straighter, his expression serious as he answered Dean. "With some luck, none." He ignored Dean’s little smirk. 

Dean chuckled. “Do you think you’re that lucky?” He shook his head, taking a seat on the couch as he waited for his time to go onstage.

No. Most definitely not. "No one will interrupt your performance. I will make sure of that." He replied with confidence."

“Don’t get cocky now.” Dean stood still as his mic was adjusted, and he was guided onto the stage, starting off as he always did. He looked down at the floor as the lights came up and the crowd cheered, then he slowly raised his head, bringing his hands together in the air. 

“Hello, London! How are we feeling tonight?”

Cas followed behind, standing to the side of the stage. One of the bigger gentlemen came to stand with him just in case, their eyes shifted between Dean and the audience.

Dean ran through the first half of his set without a hitch, getting the crowd pumped and excited as ever. But just as he was turning to walk offstage for the set change, it happened. A drunken fan lunged herself onto the stage.

Luckily, Cas caught her before she got far. He saw it happening, the girls in the front row absolutely crazy for Dean. She was a little more aggressive than the last, but he managed to escort her off without a hitch.

Dean gave Cas a thumbs-up as he went to his dressing room for a breather, drinking down the bottle of fruit water that’d been refrigerated for him during the flight.

Cas palmed her off to the backstage crew, Jo praising him and giving him an energy bar to keep him going. He took a small breather before rejoining Dean in the dressing room. What was with this guy and his damn fruit water?

“And what was this about luck you were saying?” Dean asked with another small smirk, sitting back on the couch as he crumpled up the empty water bottle and tossed it toward the trash. It missed.

"I didn't say my luck was good," considering he was stuck with this insufferable ass. Cas rolled his eyes as Dean threw the bottle, moving over and bending down to pick it up, tossing it in the trash.

Dean chuckled. He might’ve done that on purpose just to watch Cas bend over. But he wouldn’t admit that. “Thanks. You excited for the after party?”

"It's not really a party I'm attending, Dean. I'm doing my job, so not really something i'm excited about." Watching a sex party go down where he was the guard was going to be...frustrating considering his dry spell.

“Oh, c’mon. You’re allowed to have fun. I’m not gonna tell anyone. Shit, I probably won’t even remember, honestly.” He laughed, standing up as he was given a two-minute warning. “Think about it.” He reached out and squeezed Cas’ shoulder on his way toward the stage.

Cas didn’t say anything. He wouldn’t risk his job like that. He followed Dean out, taking his place yet again.

Dean prepared for his second half, doing his usual spiel and witty banter and of course, the crowd ate it up. By the end, he was wiped but still pumped from the adrenaline of it all.

Luckily with no desperate fangirls flinging themselves on stage, the rest of the concert went relatively smoothly. Cas let out a sigh of relief, managing to get another power bar in as Dean closed up the show. He made small talk with the other guard, but he wasn't much of a conversationalist, so he gave up.

Dean bid the crowd goodnight, waving and blowing kisses until he’d left the stage. “Whew. Another successful show.” He grinned, heading to his dressing room to finally free himself from his leather pants and change into the jeans he’d brought.

Cas was getting used to this routine, already making arrangements for transport to the hotel for Dean. "There will be the limousine out front for you in five minutes; would you like any of your...guests in the car with you?" He asked, knowing he would need to do a thorough check over each one to make sure they weren't a threat or harboring weapons.

“No, they’ll ride separately. It’ll be just you and me in the limo again.” Dean grinned, walking over to Cas once he’d changed into a pair of black skinny jeans. “I’ll greet them at the hotel.”

"Alright." Cas nodded, knowing the other security guards would do a thorough job at check over them. "The car won't be too long; would you like a drink in the meantime?" Cas offered.

“Yes, please.” It seemed like he was starting to grow on Cas. That, or he’d finally realized how much he needed to stay on Dean’s good side. But he didn’t really care about the reasoning. 

Cas figured he would just give in to Dean's desires, it would make his job smoother. He made a call to one of Deans' assistants, met with a bottle of beer in mere seconds. He takes it and passes it to Dean. “Here.”

“Thanks.” Dean popped off the top of the beer and took a long sip as he waited for the limo. It calmed him a little.

Cas awkwardly waited around, his phone buzzing to alert him. "Lets go." Cas gestured for Dean to head of the room first and make his way to the limo.

Dean quickly obeyed, bringing his beer with him as he was escorted into the limo, sliding across the seat and laying back. He rested his head in his hands. “Tonight’s gonna be fun.”

“Do you have something in particular planned?" Cas asked, slipping in to sit across from Dean, his eyes on the rockstar.

“Just the usual. Music, champagne...and we’ll see where the night takes us.” Dean sat up a little, wondering how he could convince Cas to let loose a little without having to threaten him.

Cas nods a little. Fingers crossed this would be over quickly so he could go to a bar. He wanted to go vent his frustrations out on some random patron, get all his anger out and reset for the tour.

  
  


***

Dean excitedly hopped out of the limo when it pulled up outside the hotel and got in the elevator up to his room. Luckily, no one had arrived yet, so he peeled off his muscle tank and put on a basic white t-shirt instead, layering his leather jacket over it.

Cas followed Dean upstairs, standing in the corner of the room. "Is there anything you wish for me to do before the party starts?" 

“Nope. Just stand there and look pretty.” Dean dimmed the lights, setting the mood while not making it pitch black. “Since we’re not having the lights completely off this time as I think that’d be safer, I want you to make sure no one has a phone or any other sort of recording device on them.”

"I can do that," Cas answered with ease. "Are you ready for me to start letting your guests in?" 

“Yep.” Dean lined up the champagne flutes that’d been prepared for him and took one, sitting at the edge of the bed. He wondered if this would come as a surprise to Cas or not, but a guy had been invited this time.

Cas stepped out of the door, telling all party guests to enter and that any phones or recording devices needed to be left outside. They could collect it on their way out. There were a few groans of disdain, but everyone complied. Cas was careful to pat down each guest, letting them in one at a time, and was surprised when he came face to face with a cute guy. He hesitated for a moment, his lean frame and brown eyes made his breath catch. He took a little longer with him and was finished off with a playful wink from the guest. 

"Bags on the security," He purred and Cas felt his cheeks flush a little, checking over the last guest and stepping in behind her, closing the door behind them, then taking his post inside. 

“Welcome, welcome! You all are looking amazing tonight.” He chuckled as he stood, greeting each guest with a hug and a cheek kiss before he passed out the champagne.

“So, how about I kick this off with a song?” He was met with a few claps and cheers as he picked up his guitar and had everyone gather around the large bed.

Cas kept quiet, up against the wall but his eyes were clear on the handsome stranger. When their eyes met, he felt his mouth dry and all he wanted to do was pin that guy against the nearest wall.

_ Not professional, eyes on Dean _ , he reminded himself, eyes falling back on the rockstar as he played the guitar.

Dean knew exactly what he was doing. He set the guitar down once he was finished and handed it to Castiel for it to be put away safely once the party kicked into high gear.

He was met with another round of applause and he raised a toast before chugging down his glass and shimmying off his leather jacket. His eyes fell upon Cas for a second before he moved to pull the guy sitting on his bed close and kissed him.

Cas placed the guitar carefully in the closet, coming back out to take his place again. His lips parted as his gaze fell on Dean and this brown-eyed stranger making out on the bed. He swallowed thickly, trying to remain calm, but Dean’s moans played on a loop in his head and he felt his cock spring up in excitement. He prayed to look away but he couldn't; it was like live foreplay.

Dean pulled back, a little breathless as he bunched up the guy’s shirt in his fist, relying on him for balance. He then tugged on his dark hair and began to kiss him more deeply, sliding his hands over his smooth abs.

Cas felt his cock straining, leaning against the wall as he tried to breathe. He was praying it was dark enough that no one would notice Cas having a damn near aneurysm. He panted a little, eyes dilated with lust.

Dean smirked against his lips, biting his bottom lip before he pulled back. His eyes shifted over to Cas for a moment, chuckling. “Sure I can’t tempt you to come over here?” He asked. He lay back, sprawling himself across the bed and surrendering to the group. This was his favorite part. Hands and mouths all over him, bruising his skin, tugging off his clothes, making him groan.

Cas pretended he wasn't interested, even though he was rock hard and aching to be touched. He had to remain professional. He couldnt leave his post. He had to do his job. His eyes fell back, trying not to let it affect him, but the moans and skin on skin, the shift of clothes being shed, was too much.

Dean’s moans reverberated around the room, his body writhing beneath several others and the bed creaked under the weight of the group. A different hand or mouth seemed to connect with a different part of his body every second until he was completely tangled in a web of limbs. But his sight was on one person only, the clearly uncomfortable security guard standing near the door.

Cas' eyes briefly met Deans and he did his best to drag his attention away to the wall, his cock urging him to look back but he had to do his best not to or else he knew he wouldn’t last.

***

When the party ended, he was thoroughly exhausted, bidding everyone farewell as the group collected their clothes and walked out of the room, everyone looking disheveled and wrecked.

He slid beneath the covers and closed his eyes, his head spinning.

Cas' eyes fell on the man who had hit on him when he first entered, the guy giving Cas a once-over. Cas had him hang back, telling him he needed to check his pockets. With him thinking Dean is asleep and the party guests having left, he shoved the guy up against the door and drew him in for a hot and heavy kiss, filled with utter desperation.

Dean hadn’t fallen asleep quite yet and when he heard a few grunts, his eyes snapped open. He quickly brought his hand up and clamped it over his mouth to keep himself from making any noise, and watched wide-eyed as Cas had his way with one of the party guests. He felt a slight pang in his chest, a feeling he couldn’t quite place.

Cas had the guy pinned between him and the door, a hand between both of them as he fondled the guest. He was clumsy, not having much experience with men.

The guy pulled back, giving Cas a knowing smile. "Give me a call sometime. I’m too beat for round two." He chuckled, grabbing Cas’ hand and scribbling his number on it before slipping out the door. 

All Cas wanted was to get loud, have a little release. He growled in annoyance, still hard and now unbelievably frustrated as he checked over Dean's hotel room to make sure no one had hung behind. He would have to make a trip to a bar downtown but he was so exhausted.

Dean was completely wiped, but his pettiness won over every time. He slowly sat up, a smirk on his face as he covered his lap with the bedsheets.

“Well, well, well. Seems like someone took my advice and let loose for once. Too bad you waited until the end of the party. Could’ve been fun.” He chuckled, thoroughly amused at how flustered Cas was.

“I-I don't know what you are talking about." He muttered, having jumped a little as he realized Dean was awake. “Do you require anything else or may I leave?" He asked, his hands falling to not to subtly cover his crotch the best he can.

“Oh, you don’t? Are you sure about that?” Dean chuckled. “Come here, Castiel. I ‘require’ you to spend the night with me.”


	4. The London Eye

"I have a room, Dean. I am not sleeping on your couch,” he replied in slight annoyance.

“Well, I agree. You’re not sleeping on my couch.” Dean couldn’t help but laugh again. “This bed is really big, Castiel. Almost...too much for one person by themselves you might say.”

His eyes narrowed just a touch. "You want me to sleep in your bed?" He asked. He was half-tempted to grab a pillow and suffocate Dean with it until he passes out, just so he can get some rest and jack himself off.

“Yes.” Dean nodded. “I’ll put it this way. That guy wrote his number on your hand, right? Meaning he left you hot and bothered. So you’ve got two options. One is to go out and find someone to satisfy you. Two is to go back to your room and take care of yourself. The first option could get you in a shitload of trouble and the second option is kinda depressing. So here’s option three. I’m drunk but not too drunk not to know what I’m doing. You’re desperate. Let me help you out.”

"Wait, you want- with me? Why?" Cas asked incredulously, wondering what kind of evil twisted manipulative shit this was, and what it would be used against him later for. But at that point, he didn't care. He was hard, and desperate enough to fuck anyone, even his boss. He just needed an answer; hell Dean could shrug and he wouldn't care, all he needed was release and the permission to do so. 

“I’m not soulless. I know I’ve made you miserable for 24 hours straight. But it was a test, and you passed. I’ve had so many shitty security guards that give up on me, I gotta make sure. I need to know that I can break you to the point of you wanting to snap my neck, but you still wouldn’t let anyone else touch me. I need that kind of assurance because there are some crazy fucking people out there who would hurt me if given the chance. And don’t get me wrong, I’m gonna keep making your life a living hell, but I think that’s enough for one night, huh?”

"Fuck, you ramble on so god damn much." Cas shoved Dean back against the bed and climbed on top of him. He grabbed his hips and dragged him to lay flat on the bed, leaning over him and meeting his lips in an angry, heated kiss. Cas had never felt like this before, this raw, intense anger that made him want to simultaneously kill Dean and fuck him speechless.

“Oomf!” Dean groaned as he was shoved back, the wind knocked out of him by Cas’ intense kiss. He hadn’t been expecting that. He was simply going to lean over and suck him off, but this was...better? A surge of heat shot through him and though he’d just spent the last several hours entangled with strangers, it turned him on again.

Cas pinned Dean's arms down, sucking down on his bottom lip as he ground himself down against Dean's thick thigh. _Fuck he was hot_ , shrouded in sweat and muscle.

Dean leaned his head back and closed his eyes. This was what he’d driven Cas to over the past 24+ hours. And he was pleased. As slutty as he was, he’d never crossed this boundary with someone who worked for him before.

Cas knew it was wrong, but he didn't care, too caught up in the moment to think about any repercussions. He ground his hips harder, his hand slipping down to touch himself; he knew it wouldn't take much for him to come. So much lust, and anger. All he needed was Dean to moan for him and he would be finished. He moved from Dean's lips to kissing his neck, leaving a long, slow lick along the skin and biting down to suck a mark of his own.

Dean shuddered. He knew he’d spend the next couple days with a large bruise on his neck and no one would question it because he was always covered in hickeys. That was a big part of the reason he’d had to start wearing makeup onstage. “Cas-fuck,” he cried out, not meaning to moan his name like that, but he couldn’t help himself.

Cas had freed himself from the confines of his jeans, stroking quickly and the second Dean moaned his name, he came into his hand with a loud growl. He pulled back from Dean's neck, panting softly as he tried to regain some composure but couldn't will himself to move just yet.

“Damn,” Dean murmured, breathless as he watched Cas get off. He hadn’t expected this raw, aggressive side of him, but he liked it. “Feel better?”

"Yeah," Cas breathed out, tucking himself away in his jeans and rolling off Dean. He took a tissue from the bedside and wiped his hand clean. He swallowed thickly, wondering what the hell he had just done.

“Good.” Dean lay on his back, one arm bent with his hand behind his head as his chest heaved. “I didn’t think you were gonna kiss me like that, but holy shit. That was hot as fuck.” He chuckled, rolling over slightly to face him. “Don’t worry about this, alright? No one’s gonna find out. And if anyone asks questions, I’ll say something at the party went wrong and I requested overnight security.” He sighed a little. “Will you stay? You can cling to the complete other side of the bed all night for all I care, but I fucking hate sleeping alone.”

"I apologize. I got caught up in the moment." He murmured, his eyes on Dean as he blinked sleepily. "Yeah, alright. I'm too tired to go back to my room, anyway." Which was half a lie. He also hated sleeping alone, even if all he would have was a warm body within arms reach.

“Don’t apologize, Castiel. I offered.” Dean rolled away from him, pulling the covers over his head to burrow into them and closed his eyes. He was too tired to think about the consequences of what just happened. He’d deal with it later, if at all.

Cas tried to push it out of his mind and he prayed that when he woke up in the morning, it would just be a dream. He hardly slept. When he noticed the alarm clock click over to 5am, he carefully rolled out of Deans bed, being rather quiet as he grabbed his stuff and made a beeline to the door.

He headed down to his room to shower, scrub himself down and try to get some shut-eye.

***

Dean woke up late into the morning to find his bed empty. He sighed, but he wasn’t surprised. He pulled himself out of bed and into the bathroom, filling the tub with hot water and sinking into it. He’d just sit here and wait until someone brought him breakfast.

Cas had had breakfast at that point, pretty much waiting for Dean, but when he hadn't come downstairs yet, he got a little worried. Not that he would ever admit that out loud.

He headed upstairs, dressed in his usual all black attire and signature I-don't-give-a-fuck hair. He entered the suite, peering around. "Dean?" He called out, making his way through the rooms until he found Dean in the tub. "Hm. I was expecting to see you passed out in a pool of your own vomit," he commented with ease to hide his relief that that wasn't the case.

Dean rolled his eyes. “You saw me last night. I wasn’t _that_ drunk. I still remember everything that happened.” He smirked, climbing out of the tub and grabbing a towel off the rack to wrap around him. “I normally get room service up here for breakfast, but it hasn’t come yet. Did you see them?”

Cas averted his eyes as Dean climbed out of the tub, trying to hide his obvious fear. He was half-hoping that Dean was too drunk to remember, but of course his luck wasn't that good. "No. Did you order breakfast?" Usually at a hotel, someone had to do that.

“Uh...no. I never order my own breakfast.” Dean sighed. “Whatever. Guess I’m doing it this time.” He plopped onto the bed and picked up the phone, over-exaggerating how annoyed he looked with having to do this simple task, and called room service.

“Yeah, Dean Winchester. I know. I know. Uhh, waffles I guess. And coffee. Thanks.” He hung up, looking over at Cas. “So...you left last night, after I asked you to stay. And no one called in my breakfast this morning. I thought I was finally getting through to you, but I guess not.”

"Oh, apologies for you having to do such a menial task such as dial the front desk and order food." Cas’ words were dripping with sarcasm. "And you didn't specify how long I was to stay, so I went to get ready for today." He was scraping by with technicalities, and he was half expecting getting hit at least once for his attitude.

Dean was starting to lose his patience. “What the fuck is your problem? Did everything I told you last night go out the window? I can call Jo right now and you’ll never find work again, so I’d watch your tone with me.” He reached up and rubbed the side of his neck, tracing his fingers over the bruise Cas had given him.

Cas nostrils flared. Dean was being a little bitch that morning, so he had to suck it up, "My apologies." His eyes fell to the bruise, last night worming its way back into his thoughts. He swallowed, taking his position next to the door.

“Uh huh.” Dean stood, walking over to his suitcase and pulling out some clothes so he could get dressed. He didn’t care about Cas seeing him naked, but every time Dean watched him actively look away while he was changing, it made him laugh.

Hearing the other man laugh made his cheeks burn in pure embarrassment. He hadn't seen a man naked before, bar a few drunken nights and dark alleyways. He shifted in his spot, clenching his jaw.

Once dressed in a pair of jeans and a plain t-shirt, Dean sat on the edge of his bed, waiting for room service. “You just gonna stand there and make sure the door doesn’t jump out and hit me?” He asked.

"Is there something else you would like me to do?' He asked, his back straight and eyes not moving from his spot on the wall.

“Sometimes I question whether you’re actually a person, or you’re some kinda robot with programmed responses that get switched on when you’re pissed. Come here. Sit. Talk to me like a normal human being. I promise the wall isn’t gonna attack me.”

"I'm here to guard you and protect you. Interpersonal relations are not usually a part of my job." He replied cautiously, wondering what Dean wanted from him exactly.

Dean sighed. “You’re such a buzzkill, Castiel. Would you just come sit? There’s nothing to protect me from right now.”

Castiel gingerly moved from his post, carefully taking a seat on the edge of Dean's bed. "You can just call me Cas."

“Why, are we not trying to maintain a professional relationship? Cas seems so informal.” Dean smirked, glad Cas had finally obliged.

Cas gritted his teeth, "I just prefer Cas. But if you want to call me Castiel, that is your prerogative to do so."

“Fine, Cas. So, are we gonna talk about last night or what?” Dean sighed. “I’m guessing that was a one off thing? You don’t wanna do it again?”

"I didn't think you would even want to mention last night," Cas said honestly. Mostly when these moments happened out of passion or a drunk error of judgement, they were ignored. "I don't think it would be professional to do it again," He said slowly, but that didn't mean that he didn't want to. The tip of his tongue was still reminiscent of the taste of Dean’s skin no matter how many times he brushed his teeth and Dean’s moans stirred something in him he couldn't smother.

Dean nodded. “No, it wouldn’t be professional. But if you find yourself in last night’s situation again, which I’m sure you will...it’ll stop you from potentially doing something less professional.” He chuckled. “So...I don’t mind. Just to help you out.”

"Alright, uh...thanks." Cas replied, feeling another flush of embarrassment wash over him. Did Dean really think of Cas as too pathetic to get laid on his own? He was glad to be distracted when someone knocked on the door. Cas rose to his feet and hurried out, grabbing the cart from the man who delivered it with a “thank you.”

“No problem.” Dean couldn’t help but think that he looked kind of cute when he blushed. Cas was attractive. He wasn’t going to deny that. And the forbiddenness of the situation made him even more appealing to Dean.

“Ooh, is that my breakfast? Bring it over.” He perked up, eyeing the cart. 

Cas took Dean’s coffee and waffles to him, placing the hot coffee on his bedside table so he didn't burn himself. "Here." He passed the plate and cutlery to Dean.

“Thanks.” Dean smiled, scooting the cart over to him and starting on the waffles. “Mm!” He exclaimed with his mouth full. “These are awesome.”

"Good." Cas smiled a little. Dean’s genuine smile was nice; he hadn't seen it up to this point.

“So...I’ve got the day off, then we’re on a plane to Paris tonight for tomorrow’s concert. What would you think about going shopping today? Jo doesn’t let me go anywhere without security, so you’re kinda stuck with me. Hate to break it to ya.”

"That is fine," Cas answered. He was hoping to get some time off to go sightseeing, but this was his job; he would just have to save up and come back to London another time.

“You sound so excited,” Dean murmured, grabbing his coffee off the nightstand and taking a sip. “What would you rather be doing, sleeping? Plotting my murder?” He smirked.

'I already have your murder planned." His humor was dry and most people found it more cringe worthy than humorous but Cas didn't mind. “I am here to serve you, Dean, so if you would like to go shopping today, I will accompany you.”

“Ooh, I figured.” Dean chuckled. It kinda turned him on to hear that Cas was ‘here to serve’ him, but he didn’t say anything. He finished his breakfast, wheeling the cart toward the door to be picked up later.

Cas was surprised that Dean didn't ask him to move his cart for him but he would take it as Dean’s manners from his childhood kicking in a little. Cas drew himself to his feet. "Do you have any siblings?" 

Dean raised an eyebrow, not expecting that question. “You obviously didn’t look up my Wikipedia page before taking this job.” He laughed a little. “Yeah. I’ve got a younger brother. He’s...oh god...I guess 19 now? We haven’t really spoken in a while.” 

"I didn't know who you were prior to taking this job," Cas replied honestly. "I do not look up the people I protect because it's easier to leave when the contract is up." Which was true. He barely spoke more than a few words with his last superiors. Cas nodded at Dean’s answer. Hm, wouldn't have guessed he was a big brother. A younger one maybe.

“I guess that makes sense, but you’re going in blind. Maybe you would’ve known what you were getting yourself into and declined the job if you’d looked me up.” Dean grabbed his leather jacket and shrugged it on, then his boots. “Alright, you ready to head out?”

"I would have taken the job regardless." He answered bluntly, drawing himself to his feet. He was in no position to turn down a job."Yes."

“Fair enough.” Dean picked up the key card off the desk and slid it into his pocket, opening the door and heading to the elevators. “Figured it’d be nice to have a look around today. See London.”

"Mm." Cas gave a small nod. It looked like what a typical day in London was, well, what he had heard anyway. The dreary clouds, cool weather and herds of people. Unfortunately with Dean not wearing any kind of disguise, they would be stopped quite a lot.

***

“Oh my god! Is that Dean Winchester?”

“What? Where? Holy shit!”

Dean groaned, keeping closer to Cas. He should’ve brought a hat or something. He wasn’t thinking. So he was stuck posing for seemingly a hundred selfies.

Cas was careful to keep most of the girls at a safe distance, but it just seemed to keep coming. "I’m sorry, ladies. Mr. Winchester is late for rehearsal." He lied, trying to shoo them off. There were a few disappointed groans and a few girls ignored Cas' statement, still trying to take photos.

“Thank you,” Dean murmured. He loved interacting with his fans, but it was exhausting and sometimes he wanted to just be left alone. Once the crowd dispersed, he kept Cas in front of him as a shield, walking with his head down.

Cas slipped off his baseball hat and absentmindedly passed it to Dean. He messed out his own hair, resembling some dirty grunge kid but he honestly didn't care. People wouldn't look at him twice.

Dean gratefully slid the cap on, keeping his head tilted down. He smirked a little upon seeing Cas’ mussed hair and he reached forward to ruffle it a little. “Thanks.” He ducked into one of the nearby stores.

Cas grumbled, feeling like a kid as he swatted Dean's hand away with a huff. He followed Dean into the store, his eyes grazing the racks curiously.

Dean couldn’t help but laugh. “Come on, your hair’s soft. And long. Like a hippie.” He eyed the back shelf of designer sunglasses. It wasn’t like he needed a new pair, but it wouldn’t hurt to buy some while he was out. It was hardly the weather for it, but it’d disguise him a little more at least.

Cas stood close by, his eyes observing the store mostly for any kind of threat or possible annoyance to his client. He at least kept himself entertained, eyes scanning for exits and playing a number game in his head.

Dean picked out a pair of Ray-Bans and tried them on, walking over to Cas. “Whatcha think?”

Cas snapped out of his daze, his eyes falling on Dean. He raised his eyebrows a little; they looked like sunglasses. "Fine." He answered.

“Very descriptive. Thanks.” Dean chuckled. “Alright, well, I’m gonna buy them. I need some kinda disguise.” He walked up to the front counter and took out his wallet, trying to keep his head down still.

Cas nods, tucking his hands into his pockets as he stands to the side. They would find it odd, disguise or not. Dean was tall, well-built and obviously well dressed and handsome. Cas was kinda weird, lanky and there was just something...odd about him, not to mention his clothes matched his dishevelled appearance

Dean kept them on as he walked back over to Cas. “You wanna buy anything? It’s on me. No offense, but you kinda look homeless walking next to me.”

"You are the one who is dressed like they are at a fashion show in Milan. This is how average people dress." He gave Dean a disdained look.

“I’m wearing a t-shirt and jeans, Castiel, even if they are designer. You’re...I don’t even know. But if you’re trying not to stand out, it’s not really working.”

"Why does my appearance matter?" He asked with a huff of annoyance. "I’m wearing all black. It's not like I am wearing a fruit headdress.”

“No, that’d be an improvement.” Dean snorted. “Fine. I’m offering you free clothes here. Take it or leave it.”

He glowered at Dean, refusing to back down. He wanted to insult Dean, but he wouldn't get very far. So he just bit his tongue and stayed quiet. How was it that Dean knew just how to get under his skin and scratch at him?

“I’ll take that as a no. C’mon, let’s find somewhere else to hide.” He put his hands on Cas’ shoulders, standing behind him and guiding him out of the store.

Cas huffed again, heading back out towards the street. "Where to next?" He asked, turning back to look at Dean for a brief minute.

Dean shrugged. “I dunno. I just wanna be outside as little as possible. It’d be fun to do touristy things, but that’s where most of the people are...”

"The London Eye is an option. You can get a private capsule and be away from the public?" He suggested, his eyes moving to look at Dean properly.

“Oh, that Ferris wheel thing? Great idea!” Dean didn’t really consider being trapped in a small box with Cas for a few minutes, but it was probably way worse for Cas than it was for him.

Cas nodded. "I think it should be nearby. It's visible over the buildings." Cas gestures towards the rather large, very obvious Ferris wheel.

“Oh, don’t think I can see it.” Dean squinted. “Oooh, that huge thing right in my face? Ohhhh. Let’s go.” Yeah, he was at the immature stage of being obnoxious for no reason at that point. He clapped Cas on the back, then started over. “Are we gonna have to wait in a long ass line for this?”

Cas rolled his eyes. _Fuck_. He hoped the bloody thing only went for a few minutes or he would try and find an exit to climb out of, or hit the emergency button. Or maybe kill Dean. He mulled over the choices before answering Dean's question.

"Considering you are throwing around money without care, I'm sure if you slip the security guard a decent amount, we might get one of the VIP capsules and be bumped to the front.”

“Good point.” Dean was used to getting VIP treatment wherever he went, and this would be no different. He bought two tickets, then got in line with Cas. When the ticket checker came over, he did as was suggested, lowering his sunglasses a little to look at the man before slipping him 150 pounds.

They were escorted to the front of the line immediately and Dean winked at Cas.

Cas just shook his head and looked at him like, _why are you winking? I told you._

As they were let into the next booth that came along, despite the frustration of the people they cut in front of, the door was locked securely behind them. It was larger than Cas expected. Spacious, with a small couch in the center of the pod. Cas immediately moved to the railing, glancing around the room.

“Damn.” Dean whistled as he looked around. He plopped onto the couch, looking out through the glass window. “This would be such a cool place for one of my parties...”

"Dean. This is a place for families. Not a drug induced orgy." Cas scoffed, making his way to glance around at the information boards. The pod had started moving slowly as he skimmed the safety procedures and his eyes slowed to the typical time for one loop.

"Dean. One cycle around this goddamn Ferris wheel is 30 minutes. I thought you said it was only a few minutes!" He groaned in annoyance, eyes glowering as he rounded on the rock star.

Dean shrugged. “I’ve never been on this before. How the hell was I supposed to know? And you’re the one who suggested it.” Great. A full half hour trapped in here with Mr. Grumpy pants.

“Still think it’d be a good place. Families my ass. How many people you think fucked in here?”

"Great. If I'm stuck in here with you for half an hour, I’m going to kill you and then myself." He was being dramatic. It wasn't such a bad thing, he just...wasn't the biggest fan of enclosed spaces.

"Ugh, why are you so vile? Is everything about sex with you?" He added.

“Yeah, nothing screams ‘family friendly’ like a murder suicide.” Dean shook his head. “But it’d make quite the headline.”

Glancing up at Cas, he shrugged. “Well, we’re stuck here now, so may as well make the best of it. And yeah, pretty much everything is.”

"Should have guessed." Cas muttered, leaning up against the railing as his eyes moved out to the tinted view.

“At least we get a good view of the city, right?” Dean got up, standing beside Cas as he gazed out through the glass. “This isn’t so bad.”

"Mm..." Cas murmured, his fingers tracing along the railing. This place was so new to him and despite the dreary, overcast weather, it was beautiful.

Dean went back over to the couch after a minute or so, laying down. It was pretty relaxing in there. He understood why the Ferris wheel was so popular.

Cas looked over at Dean and sighs. "Dean. This is not your bedroom; don't put your boots on the couch,” he admonished; it was like babysitting a child.

“Yes, mother.” Dean rolled his eyes and reached down to unlace his boots, slipping them off before returning his feet to the couch.

"Do you treat every place like it's your home? It's gross." Of course this was going to be the ride Dean and Cas were stuck on; Cas would nit pick and Dean would cop the brunt of it.

Dean shrugged. “I’m making myself comfortable. We’ve got half an hour in here and it’s only been like five minutes. So you can either stand there with that stick up your ass or try to make the best of it. I did pay a lot of money to be here.”

"Fine,” He muttered, turning to glance out the large glass window. He caught his own reflection in the mirror and shifted a little, trying to flatten out his wind blown hair. He averted his eyes and instead focused on the view.

“Good.” Dean picked himself off the couch and decided to look around at all the amenities. “Oh, shit. This place has a mini bar! Come on. This is awesome.”

"How is it you manage to find alcohol any place you go?" Cas asked, but honestly, he could use a drink. "Do they have any whiskey? Or beer?" Cas moved forward to stand next to Dean, peering over his shoulder.

“Consider it a hidden talent.” He pulled out a few miniature bottles of whiskey and set them on the table. “I think I’ve found the solution to being trapped in here with you.” He smirked.

"What? Drinking?" Cas asked, bending down to pick up one of the small bottles. It was good, better than the cheap stuff he usually drank.

“Damn straight. Bottoms up.” Dean laughed, taking off the top of the small bottle and tipping back it like a shot. He went for another one, already feeling better.

Cas took the lid off his, following suit, although he couldn't drink much. He was on duty.

Dean stopped after about three shots’ worth. It was enough to give him a pleasant buzz, but not so much that Cas would get upset with him. “See? Isn’t this better already?” He chuckled.

"Yes, much better." He took a seat on the floor, feeling much more at ease and less annoyed at being stuck in this confined space.

Dean went back to the couch, kicking his feet up and glancing down at Cas. “Thanks for coming with me today. I mean, I know you have no choice, but it’s better than going with anyone else on the team. They’re all...worse than you.” He didn’t know how else to phrase that. It wasn’t quite a compliment toward Cas, but it was almost one.

"It's fine." He glanced up at Dean. "I thought I would give you the heads up; my days off are Wednesdays. So you will have another guard that day." He informed, leaning back on his palms.

Dean nodded. “So you’re stuck with me 24/6 then. I can work with that.” He laughed a little, ultimately giving up and returning to the mini bar. His restraint sure lasted.

Cas hummed a little, brushing one hand through his hair as he watched Dean traipse back to the bar for some more alcohol. "I'm not carrying you back to the hotel." 

“Relax. Just one more drink.” Dean chuckled, grabbing another one of the whiskey bottles and knocking it back.

"Dean. Whiskey is a strong alcohol; stop shotting it.” He scowled, knowing he would be the one having to drag Dean's half-dead self home.

“Stop parenting me. I know my limits.” Dean sighed and walked over to Cas. “You’re just gonna be a pain in my ass this entire time, aren’t you?”

Cas looked up at Dean from the floor. "Yes." He was lightly buzzed and claustrophobic, and his patience was wearing thin. 

“Would it be more fun for you if we fooled around a little bit?” Dean asked with a small smirk.

Cas narrowed his eyes. Of course it would be, but he wasn't telling Dean that. "You are an idiot." He scoffed, drawing himself to his feet.

“So no?” Dean chuckled. He was still too sober to blame it on the alcohol, but Cas didn’t fully know his tolerance yet and didn’t have to know that.

Cas rolled his eyes. "You are going to keep bothering me this whole ride huh?" He glowered, moving closer and pushing Dean back. "Sit on the chair.” He couldn't help it. He could act like he didn't want it, but he wanted to hear Dean moan again, wanted to feel his fingers tug and pull at his long hair desperately.

“You call it ‘bothering’ and I call it making conversation, but yes.” Dean chuckled, raising an eyebrow when Cas suddenly became commanding. “Oh, yes sir.” He couldn’t tell whether he was going to get lectured or straddled, but he obeyed, taking a seat on the couch.

Cas dropped to his knees in front of Dean, his eyes lifting to meet his for a brief second. This was something he could do well. He caught Dean's zipper between his lips and tugged it down, his fingers flicking open the button. He brushed his tongue over Deans clothed cock, taking the fabric between his teeth and growling a little as he pulled at them.

Dean’s eyes widened a little as he glanced down at Cas, parting his legs and leaning back against the couch cushion.

“Oh, this is super family friendly,” he smirked, but the expression on his face was immediately changed to a soft moan.

"Goddammit, shut up or I will bite it off," Cas chastised, tugging Deans underwear down. Seeing him properly in the light, he was bigger than Cas expected. He slipped his fingers down the shaft and sat up, his lips wrapping around Dean's tip, and took him in slowly without any hesitation. 

“Oh fuck, Cas...” Dean gasped, arching his hips forward automatically. He honestly didn’t expect Cas to know what he was doing so well. But it felt incredible.

"Mm...." Cas hollowed his cheeks, running his tongue along the underside of Dean's thick cock as he worked him slowly. He loved Dean saying his name like that; it was gorgeous.

“Mmmf.” Dean began to rock his hips forward into Cas’ mouth, reaching down to lightly tug at his hair. This was far better than any drunken party blowjob he’d received.

Cas enjoyed having his hair pulled, a lot. He dragged his nails down Deans thighs slowly, moaning around his cock as he kept up a slow, even rhythm.

Dean let out a loud cry, his fingers slipping through Cas’ dark hair as the tugs turned into more forceful yanks. His back arched, his cock twitching in Cas’ mouth before he came down his throat.

Cas let out a moan, his eyes falling shut as he swallowed down all that Dean had to offer. He tasted salty, something Cas adored as he slowly pulled off, his tongue licking Dean's tip as he sat back on his ankles.

“If that was your way of getting me to shut up, it worked.” Dean laughed, panting hard as he tried to catch his breath. He glanced down at Cas. “You’re pretty damn good at that...”

Cas brushed his thumb along his bottom lip, cleaning up the mess he made as he looked up at Dean. "For a short time, at least." 

Dean shook his head, sucking in another breath as he watched Cas. It made him squirm a little, how erotic that small action was. “Get your ass up here,” he grunted in a low voice.

He licked the excess cum from his thumb and stood up, obedient to Dean without hesitation. "What?" He asked, voice breathy.

“Fucking hell...” Cas was driving him insane. “You are really something else.” He grabbed Castiel’s hips, pulling him forward and onto the couch beside him. Leaning over, he brushed his hand against the crotch of his pants, biting his lip.

Cas landed on the couch with a soft _oof,_ about to demand an explanation when he felt Deans palm drag slowly over his crotch. Cas fell silent and squirmed a little, panting softly.

“Mm.” Dean scooted closer to him, unzipping his black pants and tugging them down. “Look how hard you are,” he teased, brushing against him again with his palm through his underwear. “That for me?”

"If I wasn't so hard right now, I would choke you, I swear-" Cas grunted, pushing up into Dean's hand desperately. He didn't like to be teased. He wanted Dean to massage him, to stroke him. Do anything.

“Mm. I’d be into that.” Dean smirked a little, grabbing at the waistband and sliding it down. He bit his lip, his thumb gliding over the tip. He licked the palm of his other hand, wrapping it around his cock and slowly moving it up and down.

Cas watches Dean carefully, lips parted with lustful intent. He pushed up a little into his hand, wanting him to go faster. "Dean-" Cas panted softly, a slight whine in his voice as he spread his legs a little further apart.

Cas’ plea for him was music to his ears and he shuddered a little from the desperation in his voice. “Hm?” His thumb brushed over his slit, trailing down to trace along the underside as his other hand worked quicker.

"Yes- just like that--" Cas breathed out, his eyes closing as he leaned back into his palms. He licked over his lips, a symphony of moans tumbling out as he shamelessly gave into the pleasure.

Watching Cas in the midst of pleasure like that was almost too much for him, and his moans were beautiful. He continued to work over him, faster as his thumb massaged over the tip.

"I-im close-" he warned Dean, feeling that well of heat pooling in his stomach. He pushed up a little, toes curling in his boots as the wave slammed down on him and he came; breathless and flustered. He opened his eyes, half lidded with pleasure as he licked off his lips. Reality would set in soon, but he was so lost in a cloudy bliss, that nothing could bring him down.

Dean pulled his hands back and leaned down, wrapping his lips around the tip of his cock so he could catch his release.

“Mm.” He swallowed everything down, then pulled back and licked his lips as he watched Cas unravel before him. It was one of the hottest things he’d ever seen. Dean smirked a little, letting out a soft sigh in content as he pulled back, licking his lips clean. “Mm...” He wasn’t really sure what else to say. But he knew this was a very bad idea.

Cas knew he was fucked if anyone found out. There wasn't any way Cas could worm himself out of it. And he definitely didn't want to stop. He wanted to do it again. And again. What the fuck was wrong with him?

He pushed himself back into his pants, drawing himself to his feet as he noticed they were almost back on the ground. He smoothed out his hair and fixed his clothes the best he could.

Dean cleared his throat, adjusting his own pants once he saw Cas start to get up. “So uh...I guess we’re just not gonna talk about this? Pretend it didn’t happen until one of us breaks and we do it again?”

"What do you want to talk about, Dean? The fact that I would lose my job? My credibility? I would look like some cock sucking whore? I mean, come on. Your life wouldn't change. If anything, the lgbtq+ community would probably praise you, but me? Come on, Dean. It wouldn't end well for me. I'm getting paid to protect you. Not, service you." 

Cas had a point. And he wasn’t really sure what to say to that. “You’re not gonna lose your job unless I fire you. No one’s gonna find out about this. But I get it if you wanna stop. You’ve got more to lose than I do.” That half hour had gone by much more quickly than he’d thought. And he was still a little buzzed.

"Yes, I do want to stop. It's not like you have few options." He muttered. It shouldn't matter; Cas would just have to find another way to relieve himself. Dean was just annoying. And charming. And attractive. Damn it. He could just pretend he wasn't into it. Why was it so hard to? He wanted to service Dean; maybe it was confidence? Cas didn't know. But he didn't care. This wouldn't happen again. Hopefully.

“Alright. Then we’ll stop.” Dean shrugged it off, trying to keep his response casual and indifferent, but it...hurt a little. He wasn’t used to being rejected. And he certainly wasn’t used to needing to try hard to get what he wanted, so he’d stop trying. Was that a hint of jealousy he detected in Cas’ voice? He wasn’t sure.

Their little room reached the ground and the doors opened, Dean putting his boots, hat, and sunglasses back on, then stepping out.

Cas self-consciously wiped his mouth with his thumb to make sure there was nothing left, grazing his fingers through his hair. He put on his professional stature once again and followed Dean from the Ferris wheel. He glanced around, doing his usual checks for security threats.

Dean followed behind him. It was back to business as usual, he supposed, and he kept his head down as he walked to try and avoid anyone’s attention. He particularly was not in the mood to interact with fans at the moment.

Cas took a brief look at Dean. Did he honestly not care? Even a little bit? Maybe all Cas was was another person sucking Dean’s cock. He followed a few steps behind, rigid and face expressionless. He was to blend in. Not stand out.

“So uh, back to the hotel? I think I’m done with...shopping today. Unless you wanted to get food or something.” Dean’s voice was emotionless and ambivalent.

"No, I'm not hungry," he answered bluntly, his shoulders squared. He was quite content to stand in the corner of some room and sulk for the rest of the day.

“Fine, then let’s go back.” Dean sighed a little. He’d never been in a situation like this before and didn’t know what to do. He didn’t want to end things with Cas. They’d hardly started, but he wasn’t the type of person to talk about things, especially his feelings, and he had more pride than to beg Cas to do it again. So he’d wait, be passive-aggressive about it like he always was.

Cas eyes fell on Dean once again, wondering what he had to be huffy about. He could hook up with whoever, and now Cas would have to stand there and watch. And he hated it. He looked down at his hand, the ghost of a phone number still on it. Maybe it was worth giving the guy a call. Switch out with another guard under the vise of not feeling well. He needed some time, away from Dean.


	5. Brandii

Once they made it back to Dean’s hotel room, he quickly kicked off his shoes and flopped onto the bed. He wanted to be as far away from Cas as possible at that moment, yet at the same time, he didn’t want him to go. These conflicting feelings made him frustrated and angry and he needed to take it out on someone.

“Castiel,” he started. “Do you want the rest of the day off? Because I’m just gonna be in the room. I don’t need a babysitter.”

"Are you sure you do not require my services?" Cas asked for clarification, needing the okay to leave Dean alone in his room.

“I think I’ve had enough of your...services...for one day. You’re free to go. You can stop acting all miserable now.” Dean sighed. “Just uh, take my key with you so I won’t be tempted to leave. I don’t need security if I’m alone in the room.”

Cas took the key, tucking it into his back pocket. "Call me if you need me," He said before slipping from the room. He dug around for his phone as he made his way to the elevator, giving the guy from last night a call.

Dean mumbled a half-assed reply, then face planted into one of his pillows. He was on the verge of a full-blown tantrum and he didn’t want Cas to be around for that.

***

“Hey, who’s this?” The guy answered. 

"Hey, um..." Cas took a moment, shaking the image of Dean from his mind. "This is the security guard from last night. You gave me your number; I wasn't sure if you would remember." Cas rambled a little, feeling a tad awkward on the phone.

“Oh, you. Yeah. Finally slept off that hangover.” He chuckled. “But judging by the sound of your voice right now, you could really go for a drink. You done babysitting your little drama queen?” Another low chuckle.

"A drink sounds perfect right now actually." Cas smiled a little, leaning against the railing in the elevator. "I spotted a little bar on West and Main, just at the end of the block. Do you think you could meet me there soon?' He asked. It was a long shot, but he needed it.

“Uh, sure, yeah. Remind me what you look like again? Just so I can find you. I uh...don’t remember much from yesterday. Don’t even remember giving you my number, actually, but if drunk me thought you were cute, maybe sober me will too.”

Fuck, this guy was a bit of an asshole. "Six feet, longish hair, just past my chin, wearing all black. I will be at the bar; you can't miss me,” he answered as he combed his hair back just a touch.

“Alright then. I guess I’ll see you soon.” He hung up. Best to keep them waiting. He wouldn’t be leaving his hotel room for at least another half hour.

Cas pushed his phone into his pocket and it only took him ten minutes to reach the bar. He ordered a whiskey, taking it down without a hitch. It had just hit four in the afternoon and he was planning to get slammed.

Brad walked into the bar about forty-five minutes after Cas called, dressed like he’d just stepped out of one of those island vacation commercials with a powder blue button-down shirt and white slacks. He looked around for the man fitting the description. But not many people were getting hammered this early on a weeknight, so it wasn’t hard to spot him.

He slid into the stool beside him, flashing a charming smile. “Security guard?”

Cas was about to give up and call it a night after two drinks and waiting almost an hour, when he heard a voice behind him. He swivelled on his seat, brows raised just a touch as a slight smirk appeared on Cas' lips. "Drunken party guest," He responded with ease. Mm, he was even better looking in the daylight.

“Sorry I’m late. I uh...got lost trying to find the bar. Didn’t wanna go to the wrong one and end up spending my evening with some other security guard.” There was that low laugh again. “So...what’re you drinking and can I get one too?”

"It's fine," Cas answered smoothly, rolling his half full glass between his fingertips. "I’m drinking Whiskey; sure you can handle it?" He teased just a touch, taking a sip of his drink.

Brad scoffed. “What, you think I’m some kinda lightweight? I had enough champagne to fill a fountain last night.” He ordered some whiskey for himself. “You open a tab?”

"Not a lightweight, rather just not a whiskey drinker. And yes I have a tab so feel free to add to it." His bright eyes landed on Brad. 

“I can handle anything you throw at me.” He smirked, raising his glass before sipping it. “Sweet. I can definitely drink to that.”

"You think so?" Cas chuckled lowly. "So you really don't remember anything from last night?" He asked, remembering having this guy pinned to the wall. Fuck, his British accent was sexy.

He shrugged. “I remember making out with Dean fucking Winchester. And let me tell you, bucket list item ticked.” Pausing to look at him for a moment, he chewed his lip. “But we must’ve had something if I wrote my number on your hand. Might refresh my memory if you kissed me.”

"Mm." Cas finished off his whiskey. This guy was...eh. but he really was hot. He drew the guy closer, sliding his hand up his thigh as he leaned in and kissed him slowly, intensely. It wasn't the same as last night, the flurried hands and desperate lips as he shoved this guy up against the wall. But this would do.

Brad leaned forward to meet his lips, placing his hand atop Cas’ and gently squeezing his fingers. He slowly pulled away, licking his lips, then shaking his head. “Nope. I don’t remember. But that just means we’ll have to create new memories then, huh? Why don’t you tell me what happened last night? Probably after I had Dean’s cock in my mouth, yeah?”

Oh god. This guy wasn't going to shut up about Dean was he? Fuck, Cas didn't want to think about Dean, his cock or any form of blowjob. So Cas would need to try and distract him. "Mm, I had you shoved up against the door, my hands pushed up your shirt as you whined for more." He smirked a little, voice low. "But someone suddenly insisted on giving me their number instead. So, here we are." Cas squeezed his thigh.

Brad cleared his throat, trying to contain himself as Cas spoke. “I must’ve been completely wiped then to turn you down. Glad I decided on the rain check though. Two nights in a row with a yank, hm? Aren’t I lucky?” He scooted a little closer to Cas. “What’s your name?”

"I could say the same." He smirked a little, "Cas. And you are...?" He lets himself trail off as he slid his fingers further up Brad's thigh and over his hip slowly.

“Bradford. But please...call me Brad. Bradford’s the nickname I gave my penis.” His eyes followed the slow path of Cas’ fingers on his thighs. “Cas. That’s a cute name.”

_ Oh fuck. _ This guy was just, all kinds of douche. "Mm, that is until I have you screaming it," Cas murmured, his piercing eyes still on Brad’s. He wanted the guy to stop talking. He was irritating. Full of himself. And not in a sexy, alluring way, or the endearing way Dean was. 

“Is that so?” His lips curled into a sly smirk. “Are you gonna shove me against a wall again, Cas?” He took his hand, sliding it off his thigh for the moment.

“Another whiskey, please!”

"Maybe.” Cas sat back up, meeting eyes with the bartender. "Another one for me, too." He was going to regret this tomorrow but right now, he didn't care.

Brad grabbed the drink as it was poured and slid over to him and he took another couple sips. “So what’s it like being Dean’s body guard? Must be pretty cool. I mean, you do those parties all the time, right? Can’t believe I actually managed to get invited to one. I didn’t think guys ever did.”

"It's a job. I do not party with Dean. I am there to stand guard." This guy was obsessed with Dean. Is that all he could talk about?

“It still is awesome. I mean, you get to travel the world and whatnot.” He smiled. “Something tells me you’re not too fond of your boss. Are you jealous of the attention?”

Cas chuckled. "Jealous of Dean? No. It’s a tiring job. 6 days a week, 24 hours a day on call. Standing on my feet hour after hour, short breaks if any at all. It's a job. That's all it is," He told Brad. "Everyone sees playboy Dean. Fun Dean. Rock and roll Dean. And after those nights have ended, I’m the one who scrapes him off the floor and makes sure he doesn't choke on his own vomit."

Brad nodded. “Well, thank you for that perspective. I didn’t think about it.” He knocked back the rest of his drink. “How long have you been working for him then?”

He waved over the bartender, requesting another refill.

"Only a few days now. But I have worked with celebrities in this industry before. It's nothing new,” he replied, nursing his drink.

“Oh, who else have you worked with?” Brad’s eyes were slowly trailing down Cas’ body as he spoke. He couldn’t believe he’d managed a date with Dean’s security guard.

"Can't go throwing around my inside contacts." He chuckled, taking down the rest of his drink without hesitation. "If you are lucky, I might be able to hook something up for you." It was total bullshit but he was just feeding the guy what he wanted to hear. They would be in a new city the next day anyway.

“Fair enough.” Brad’s eyes lit up with excitement. First, he’d managed an invite to Dean’s exclusive party and now this? It was a dream come true. And Cas was extremely good-looking.

"Should we, maybe grab a drink to go? Head back to your hotel?" He asked, his blue eyes meeting Brad’s as if he was challenging him.

Brad nodded eagerly. “I’ve got more back in my room too.” He ordered yet another whiskey, gulped it down, then stood. He was grateful being one of Dean’s guests meant two free nights in the hotel.

What a freeloader. Fuck. He wasn't even going to offer to pay? He better be fucking amazing in bed. Cas handed the bartender his credit card, standing up and hooking his arm around Brad's waist, tugging him in closer so his obvious semi was pressed against the other male’s thigh. He leaned forward to breathe against his ear. "Should we walk or take a cab?" He murmured, his tongue flicking out to caress his lobe gently.

Brad gulped a little, leaning into Cas and sliding his hand to cup his ass gently as they left the bar. “Not really up for walking.” A shudder went through him as he felt the man’s tongue against his ear and he gave his ass a squeeze. He raised his arm, hailing a taxi and climbing into it once it pulled up to them.

Cas opened the door for him and climbed in after him. He sat close, hand on his knee. “Your address?" Cas asked, not knowing where he was.

“Mm. Same as yours. Copped two nights in that hotel from Dean. Don’t remember what it is, though...so I hope you do.” He chewed his lip, reaching up to gently caress the stubble on his cheek.

"Mm." Cas told the driver the address, leaning into Brad’s hand and slipping his palm down to graze over his crotch slowly.

Brad ran his thumb across his bottom lip, pulling it down slightly as he pushed his hips into his hand. “You’re very sexy, Cas,” he murmured, leaning up to catch his bottom lip between his teeth.

Cas rarely got compliments, but hell, he would eat them up when he did. "You think so?" He muttered, letting out a soft moan under the lip bite. The cab pulled up outside the hotel and Cas paid, ushering his guest out and towards the elevator.

“Uh huh.” He hurried inside, pressing the elevator button then pushing Cas against the wall while he waited for it to arrive. His fingers played with the buttons of Cas’ shirt, his lips going to his neck. “Can’t wait to get my hands all over you,” he breathed.

Dean meanwhile had gotten drunk and was hungry, wandering the halls of the hotel as he realized he’d locked himself out of his room.

Cas nodded, yep, this is what he needed. "Lets go to my room." He growled softly, pushing his floor button and letting his head drop back against the wall. His hands found their way down to grip Brad's ass, dragging him close as he shamelessly ground against him, his own cock already excited.

Brad held him close in the elevator, his eyes closed and his lips pressing against his neck. He was too distracted to notice Dean walk by when the elevator doors opened.

Dean’s eyes widened and he quickly bolted up the stairs to his own room, wishing he’d let Cas teach him how to pick the lock, for he was now trapped. 

Cas' eyes fell on the door as it edged open, his eyes meeting those bright green ones that made his heart flutter. When Dean bolted, Cas felt a well of shame and embarrassment.

He shoved Brad out of the elevator, pressing him up against the nearest wall and capturing him in a hot and heavy kiss. Dizzy with passion, he pulled back and passed Brad his room key. "Go wait in my room, I will be back in a moment," He breathed out. Now he would have to go find the wandering Dean to let him into his room.

“Yes,” Brad said breathlessly, disoriented from the kiss and the liquor. He unlocked Cas’ door and walked inside, looking around for a moment before he climbed onto the bed and began to undress.

Dean had run up ten flights of stairs in order to avoid the elevators and collapsed on the floor in front of his room from exhaustion.

Cas took the elevator up to Dean’s room, smoothing out his disheveled hair and re-buttoning his shirt, ignoring his raging erection. He stepped out onto Dean's floor, doing his best to seem unfazed as he hid his humiliation. He found Dean on the ground and he raised his brows. "I thought you were spending the evening in your room," Cas said flatly, swiping the card to Dean's room and nudging it open.

“Wanted some pie,” Dean murmured, struggling to get up. “Couldn’t find any. What kinda fuckin’ shitty ass hotel doesn’t have pie?” He grumbled, staggering into his room once the door was unlocked. There was a moment of awkward silence filled with tension that lingered between them before speaking yet again. 

“But I’m fine. Have fun getting sucked off by someone worse than me.” He flipped Cas off before the door shut behind him.

Cas gritted his teeth. _ Asshole.  _ He made a call down to reception and arranged for a pecan pie (he guessed, he had no clue what Dean liked) to be delivered up to Dean's room along with some aspirin and beer. What was pie without beer, after all?

Cas paced outside for a minute before heading back down to his room. He wanted this. He needed this. He told himself as he entered his room.

"Brad?" He called out softly.

Dean screamed into his pillow until his lungs burned, jumping a little when there was a knock at the door. Was it Cas coming to apologize? No, even better. It was pie. He smiled a little as he accepted the cart, wheeling it to his bed and sitting up to eat it.

“Hey, baby.” Brad purred in a low, sultry tone. He lay on his side facing Cas in a seductive pose, naked and stroking his thigh.

"Can I join you?” Cas smirked a little, kicking off his shoes and stripping out of his shirt to reveal the hard muscle underneath. He wasn't as defined as Dean, but it was clear that he worked out.

“I was hoping you would.” Brad sat up, biting his lip as he watched Cas undress. “Mmm, look at that body. You’re making me so hard.” He leaned his head back a little, his hand stroking over his own cock eagerly.

Did this guy ever shut up? Cas grabbed Brad's ankles and pulled him to the edge of the bed. He worked on undoing his belt, pulling him in for another frenzied kiss as he tried to remember whether he put his condoms in the bedside table or his bag.

Brad parted his legs, his breath growing heavier as he watched Cas undo his belt. “Ooh, you gonna fuck me? I’ve Uh...never done that before.” He bit his lip again. He wasn’t used to being tugged around and controlled like this, but he really liked it. 

"You have never been fucked before?" Cas paused. "I can jerk you off instead if you prefer,” he suggested, his hand hesitating on his zipper. The poor bastard wouldn't be able to walk properly after having Cas up his ass.

“Nope, only fucked.” He raised his hips a little. “No, I want you to fuck me. I wanna feel you inside me. Please, Cas.” He reached forward to stroke him through his pants. “Let me see how big and thick you are. You can destroy me.”

Cas would have cared more, but getting to shove this moron's face into a pillow as he fucked him was going to be the highlight of his day. "On your stomach." He growled, climbing off the bed to grab a condom and lube. He stripped down to nothing, giving himself a few hard jerks before pulling the condom on, lathering his fingers up with lube. 

“Okay.” Brad rolled over, raising his ass a little as he grabbed at the sheets in preparation. He was a little nervous, but mostly excited.

Cas slid his fingers down between his cheeks, slowly pushing one inside and moving, taking his time or this guy was going to shit funny.

Brad let out a soft whimper. “Cas...” he groaned, pushing back a little against his finger. It was a very strange feeling, but pleasant.

"Shh, just breath. Tell me if it hurts." His voice was low as he slid in a second finger, gently scissoring him open as Cas' cock twitched with want. He had to drag through this step to get to the good bit.

“Doesn’t hurt,” he mumbled, reaching down to stroke his cock to distract himself from the slight discomfort. He knew it’d be worth it.

Cas pushed in a third, keeping up a steady rhythm before pulling out his fingers entirely. He took more lube and lathered up his cock, pressing the tip at Brad’s entrance. "Tell me when." He leaned down to get a better grip on the bed.

Brad squirmed a little, pushing back slightly. He was aching to feel Cas. “Fuck...now. Need you,” he groaned.

Cas pushed in with a low growl, feeling the enveloping heat to be so good and tight. He pushed Brad further into the mattress, one hand on the headboard and the other digging into the sheets as his hips shoved Brad forward. He started off slowly, knowing exactly how this was going to go.

Brad let out a low groan, his nails digging into the sheets as he caught the pillowcase between his teeth. It felt really good. “Cas,” he whimpered, his eyes squeezing shut.

"Mm, relax baby," He breathed out, pressing kisses and bites along his shoulder to distract him from the pain. He picked up the speed a little, moving his hips to try and find that pleasurable spot.

He melted against Cas, his cries growing louder and more desperate as he ground against the sheets. “Oh my god...yes. Oh! Fuck me...” he groaned.

Cas pulled back to grab his hips, gripping his skin hard enough to leave bruises as he jutted his hips up into Brad's ass; he would get him off first, after all, he was a gentleman.

Brad felt his body begin to tremble beneath Cas. His back arched and he threw his head back as he came into his hand, moaning loudly enough for the entire floor to hear.

God he was loud. And not in that sexy way Dean was.  _ No, stop. Fuck _ . He couldn't help it. The thought of Dean, buckling under him, cock twitching as he begs for release. He rocked his hips harder and harder, letting out a low grunt as he came inside the condom and let his head fall back.

It took him a moment, but his slightly tipsy mind floated back to the fact he just fucked this guy and came thinking about Dean. 

Cas pulled out and shakily got off the bed, slipping off the condom and dumping it in the trash as he headed to the bathroom to clean up.

Brad rolled over onto his stomach, watching Cas walk to the bathroom and biting his lip as he admired his ass. “Wow,” he panted. He was extremely picky about who he had sex with and how it was done...but Cas far exceeded all his expectations.

Cas came back, a smirk on his face. He was satiated. Now how could he get rid of him?

"Mm, I promised you something in return for today and I have a friend who is close with the Arctic Monkeys. They are having a party tonight in west London. This is the address and password." He grabbed a scrap of paper and scribbled it down, tucking it into Brad’s hand. "That is if you can still walk."

“Really? Holy shit!” Brad could hardly believe this. This was the best weekend of his life. “I fucking love them!” He didn’t think he’d be lucky enough to bed Alex Turner. His streak was probably over. But a party would satisfy him. He reached over to grab his pants and placed the paper in its pocket.

“I know you travel around a lot and you’re probably leaving soon. But if you’re ever in London again, find me.” He leaned over to give Cas a kiss to show his appreciation, then carefully climbed out of bed, wincing. “Fuck!” Could he really go to a party? He’d try.

He got dressed as best as he could, then hurried out the door. “By the way, can you tell Dean I’m available for him too? And that I say thank you for all this? Seriously. The best bloody weekend of my life.”

"Sure. See ya," Cas said with a wave. Of course, he would try to fuck Dean too. Whatever. At least he was gone. Cas dug around in his side drawer, not minding the fact he was naked as he lit up a cigarette and relaxed against the headboard. Cas leaned over and picked up his phone, taking in a breath of smoke as he flicked through his messages before listening to a voicemail apparently from Dean, who clearly wasn’t sober.

“Hey...I uh, just wanted to say thanks for the pie. I assume that was you. It was a good pie. And the beer was good too, really got the taste of your cum outta my mouth. You know by giving you the day off, I thought you were just gonna rest or something. Not go fuck that dude from my party. I mean like, I don’t care. You can do whatever the hell you want. But that guy...you could do better, Castiel. I’m kinda embarrassed for you. Do you really have no self-respect? I mean you work for me...so...answers that question. Haha. But yeah. Thank you for the pie. I hope you’re having fun with that dude. His dick’s so small I bet you can’t even feel it. Haha. That’s what you get when you have no standards. You get bad sex. Was it bad? I’m gonna make you tell me all about it. Uh oh. I’m getting more beer. Fuck yeah. See you later. I hope you got super drunk beforehand. Or else...yikes. Okay. Okay. Bye, Castiel. Have fun on your day off! Or should I say, your day jacking off? HAHA.”

"Oh for fuck's sake." Cas rolled his eyes and ended the voicemail, tossing his phone on the bed and leaning back against the pillow.

***

There was a knock on the door of Dean's room, stating a loud, "room service."

Dean raised an eyebrow, standing up to answer the door. He was always cautious. So many fans tried to sneak into his room by pretending to be hotel staff. “Uh, hi. Are you here to take my cart down?” He asked, his eyes shifting to the phone in case he needed to call Cas. Wouldn’t that be embarrassing?

The girl was small, with large breasts and bleached blonde hair apparent by her dark roots. She had a clearly sprayed-on tan and was wearing heavy makeup. She had shorted her hotel uniform skirt as well. "Yeah. And my manager said to ask if you needed anything else. Apparently you are like...famous and stuff."

Dean chuckled. “I’m kinda famous, yeah.” Man she was cute. And almost exactly his type. He handed her his cart. “Well, what I need depends on how much time you have. You got other rooms to get to soon?”

She twirled her hair around her finger, giving him a bright smile. "Nah. My boss said your needs were usually specific and I could take my time," she answered, "but like, I don't mind. I could totally stay as long as you want me to." She bit her lip a little. He was hot; she definitely didn't need to go anywhere

Dean nodded. He’d normally come up with something smooth, a line to reel her in. But he was tired and hurt and just wanted an answer point blank. And it seemed like she was clearly flirting with him. “Awesome. You wanna have sex?”

"Really? Sure, okay. But I'm not, like, on the pill or anything, so you have to wear a condom. And I just got my bellybutton pierced. That won't matter, right? The clinic said I can't go swimming but said nothing about cum." She rambled on, shutting the door.

"And I ate like 30 minutes ago but I think I should be okay for sex. Having sex right after you eat doesnt matter, right? Oh! And I really only do anal stuff cause I’m saving myself for marriage and want to be like a virgin for my husband.”

Dean knew this was a mistake instantly, but as per usual, he wasn’t thinking. “Okay uh...it doesn’t matter if you’re on the pill if we’re only gonna do anal, but I’ll still wear a condom.” He sighed. What the hell was he getting himself into? But she was hot, and he wouldn’t have to listen to her talk while he was fucking her, hopefully.

“Just uh, sit on the bed for me? I’ll find a condom.”

"Okay, but like, the condom is mostly ‘cause my boyfriend totally would not be okay with me sleeping around and I think like if you come in me he might know? Like what if it comes out a bit later and he like, sees it, you know?"

She kept rambling, sitting on the bed and playing with her hair. "I like, want to be an actress, you know? I gotta have like a clean reputation." She laughed.

“You have a boyfriend?” Dean sighed again. It wasn’t like he had much of a moral code or anything, but this was starting to feel more and more like a bad idea. He wished he had Lisa. But he would see her the next day. Could he hold out that long? He didn’t think so.

He found a condom in one of the pockets of his suitcase and walked over, setting it on the nightstand for the time being. “Do you actually wanna do this or is it just because you were instructed to do as I asked? Because like...I guess I’d feel kinda shitty if that were the case.” So he had a bit of a moral code, but not much.

"Well like, you are famous," She said. "And super cute. So like yeah." She took her shirt off, fairly keen on getting to be fucked by a celebrity. "Do you like my tattoo? It's like, a butterfly for like, independence." She pulled down the cup of her bra, the butterfly a bright blue and it seemed to be swallowed by her breasts.

“Yeah. Very tasteful.” Dean smiled. He wasn’t really looking at the tattoo. “You got any more tattoos I should know about?” He asked, not caring at all that she only wanted to fuck him because he was famous. He was used to it.

"I got like, one on my back and one on my ass. If you wanna look?" She slipped the rest of her clothes off shamelessly, climbing up on the bed and getting on all fours to point them out. "I got like a crown on my tailbone and then I got a tattoo on my ass on my 21st birthday when I was really drunk that said ‘princess.’ Isn’t it cute?"

“Uh huh. Adorable.” Dean gave her ass a light tap, right over where it said ‘princess.’ He pulled off his shirt, not knowing why he’d asked. He’d just have to get her to stop talking and everything would be fine.

“Alright, come here.” He pulled her onto his lap, his hands running slowly down her body. She had a ridiculous figure, like an airbrushed magazine portrait, but in real life. His finger circled around her navel piercing.

She giggled and climbed onto his lap. "Oh my god, you know I have never hooked up with like, an older guy before," she said, not seeming to get the hint. "Your name is Dean, right? My name is Kandii. With like a K and two Is ‘cause like, I wanted my name to be original."

“Older?” Dean raised an eyebrow. “How old do you think I am?” He had to stop himself from rolling his eyes when she told him her name. He’d just focus on the tits in his face instead. He pressed his lips against the butterfly tattoo, letting his face nestled between her breasts. At least the tattoo was good for something.

"I dunno, like 30?" She said but was distracted as he squished her breasts and buried his face in them. She ran her fingers through his hair and ground her hips down on his lap. 

“Mm.” Dean didn’t bother correcting her, but he was seven years shy of 30. He reached down, unbuttoning his pants and tugging them down. He moaned softly against her chest.

For once, she actually shut up and it was replaced with gentle whimpers as he licked at her nipples. They were hard and sensitive, her hands pushing her breasts together.

“Alright, uh. Get on all fours.” He climbed back onto the bed, grabbing the condom and a bottle of lube.

She did as he asked, climbing onto the bed and getting up on her hands and knees. She knocked his phone off the bed, but didn't seem to care all that much as she pushed her ass back.

That accidentally dialed the most recent number he’d called...Cas’. But Dean didn’t notice.


	6. How May I be of Service?

The regret set in almost immediately after she’d left, but he didn’t care. He was still mad at Cas for reasons he couldn’t figure out.

“Ah, dammit. Where’s my phone?” Dean grumbled as she left. He felt like he needed a shower. Nearly stepping on it on his way to pick up his clothes, his eyes widened when he saw he had a message from Cas. He’d forgotten he’d left one for him in the first place. He pressed play.

"You know, Dean, maybe before you cast stones at me for the guys I choose to fuck, take a look at the teenage bimbos you have in your bed." There was a pause in the message as Cas took in a drag from his cigarette. "I rammed his ass so hard, that kid is going to have trouble walking, and I might fuck little dick screamers, but least I don't bang barely legal fangirls just to feel good about myself. And you are welcome for the pie. And you may have been able to get rid of the taste of me from your mouth, but no drunken whore will ever suck you as good as I did." The voicemail cut out.

Dean nearly dropped the phone again in surprise. He’d clearly pissed him off with how venomous his words were, but how the hell did Cas know already? He quickly looked around the room, paranoid, then checked his call history. His heart dropped to his stomach. He’d accidentally called Cas...and he’d heard. And now he probably looked like the biggest dick on the planet, even more so than he already was. He groaned and called Cas again.

Cas wanted to ignore it. He really did. He didn't want another show. He hesitantly answered in his usual flat tone. "Hello, how may I be of service?"

“I didn’t mean to call you,” Dean said quickly before Cas could change his mind and hang up on him. “My phone dropped on the floor while she was here and it must’ve dialed the number I called last. I’m not that much of an asshole.” He sighed. “And for the record, she works at the hotel, and is only like two years younger than me. Doesn’t matter. Can you just...come back here? I’m pretty sure I pissed her off and she’s a little whacko, so I don’t feel super safe in here alone.”

There was hesitation, a moment before Cas responded, and the only reason he entertained the idea was because it was his job; "Just give me a second to get dressed. I will be there in five," He said, hanging up and grabbing his clothes. 

He dragged himself to the bathroom and took a quick shower to get rid of the smell of sex and sprayed some cologne on. He then put on fresh clothes and headed upstairs, knocking on the en suite door.

“Thank you.” Dean clearly hadn’t prepared for the bodyguard to arrive. He should’ve cleaned up before he called Cas, but he hopped into the shower instead, eager to get rid of the remnants of Kandii. He’d never regretted sex with anyone before, so this was another new, uncomfortable feeling. He didn’t have time to get dressed by the time Cas knocked on the door, so he quickly threw on one of the bathrobes in the closet and let him in. He’d pretty much sobered up by then.

“Hey. So uh...interesting night for both of us, huh?”

"Mm, you could say that." Cas replied, his eyes meeting Dean’s for a brief minute before stepping into the rock star's en suite. "Must be a special kind of crazy to need a security guard," He stated as he looked around to make sure she hadn’t left anything behind.

“You wouldn’t believe me if I told you.” Dean chuckled and sat at the edge of the bed, eyes following the security guard around the room.

Cas leaned down and, using his pinky finger, picked up a lacy hello kitty g-string. Classy. "I assume these are not yours?"

“Uh...nope. You can just...Uh...throw those away...” Dean winced.

Cas dropped them in the trash can as he walked past. Well, at least he used protection. "Tell me." Cas had a slight smirk on his face. Hell, he was getting a slight kick out of this.

“First off, I really did not mean to call you. I didn’t even know I had until I got your voicemail. But uh...guess I deserved it after what I sent you.” He shook his head. “Fuck. She was really hot. Like, blonde, huge tits, probably fake but I don’t care. But my god...she wouldn’t shut up. I had to put my hand on her mouth. She called me old, had a bunch of trashy tattoos. Like one right on her ass that said ‘princess.’ And she only let me do anal because she’s ‘saving herself for marriage’ or some bullshit. And she had a boyfriend apparently. And like, it was fine. I got off. She didn’t because I was just kinda done with her. I dunno.”

Cas' serious face slipped and he burst out laughing, trying so hard to recompose himself. "I am so sorry for laughing at your situation but come on, you have got to laugh a little. Or you will just end up in a self-hating headspace. She was one lousy lay out of how many?" He asked, a smile still on his lips. "Don't take that shitty girl too seriously, Dean. And I know you were drunk when you sent me that first voicemail, so it's fine." He was still clearly amused, no longer upset about the voicemail. "Oh my god Dean, you are like, so big. I’m surprised you like, totally fit inside!" He mocked her voice, teasing Dean just a little.

“Shut up!” Dean groaned, grabbing a pillow and chucking it at his head. “Fuck you. I think I’m most upset that she called me old. Do I look old to you?” He sighed. “I can laugh about it. But you can’t. You just look like an asshole. Not every chick can be Lisa, I guess. She takes care of me...” he trailed off.

"Mm, but I am an asshole, Dean." He caught the pillow, the smile still evident on his lips. "You don't look old. She just- she's an idiot," He murmured, ignoring the Lisa comment. It hurt, even though it shouldn't. He shouldn't care who Dean fucked, but he did care. Just a little bit. He would have to get some headphones for the flight.

“But how about you? How was your evening with megadouche?”

"Hm? Oh, fine I guess, Cas murmured. "I got what I wanted out of it, so...And lucky him; I got him into a VIP party that's in west London tonight." Cas added, changing the subject.

Dean scooted over to sit beside him. “No, come on. I need more than that. I told you all about my awful experience. I was with the dude last night. I know he was...interesting. And how the hell did you get him into a VIP party?”

"He was awful. He kept asking about you, actually. He was so loud, my whole floor probably heard. He had never been fucked before so that was my own damn fault; I should have gagged him. The kissing was good when he finally stopped talking but the sex was, alright." He looked over at Dean briefly. "I know people.”

Dean chuckled. “Alright, so we both had bad nights. That means I can laugh at you too, huh? Since I’m also an asshole.” He smirked. “Ohh, you know people, huh? Look at you, Mr. connections. Maybe I’ll need your help getting into parties,” he teased. “It’s not like I’m a celebrity or anything.”

Cas rolled his eyes and shoved Dean gently. "Dumbass." He smiled a little, leaning back on his palms. He then sighed, rolling his head back. What a weird, fucked-up day this had been.

Dean rocked to the side when he pushed him, laughing. “So I think we’ve learned a lesson here, huh? Raise our standards.” He grinned a little bit.

"You can raise your standards, Dean; you can have anyone you want. I am traveling so much, that one night stands with dumb fucks is the best I can get."

Dean sighed. “That’s not true, Cas. You could get anyone you wanted too. You know me, first of all. And you’re...not so bad looking, you know?”

"Not so bad looking; I will write that on my resume." Cas rolled his eyes.

“Yeah...honestly, I’ve fucked a lot of girls like her, but not nearly that bad. “You know the worst part? Her name was Kandii. Spelled with a K and two Is at the end. Isn’t that awful?”

He couldn't help but chuckle at her name. "Honestly? For god’s sake, I have to try and get a look at this girl before we leave." Cas made his way over to the minibar. "Do you mind if I have a beer?" He asked, pulling out two. "Do you want one, or are you still fucked up from before?"

Dean laughed. “Sure. I’d love a beer. Drink to forget, right? Just uh...I’m still kinda only wearing a robe, so while you do that, I’ll get dressed.” Things felt a lot easier now with Cas. He wasn’t sure what had happened, but he was starting to talk to him like an old friend. He got up and went over to his suitcase, pulling out a pair of designer sweatpants and a t-shirt.

"Yeah, sure." Cas hadn't realized Dean was changing and immediately averted his eyes to instead focus on the beers. "Did you want to watch TV? I can order you something to eat," Cas suggested. He was hoping it would help Dean to unwind from his shitty night.

“Sure, sounds great.” Dean got dressed, putting the robe back in the closet and laughing softly at Cas. “You had my cock in your mouth earlier today and you’re still looking away when I change. You’re...interesting, Castiel.” He sat back on his bed, grabbing the remote.

"I- shut up!" Cas huffed, passing Dean one of the beers. His cheeks were dusted pink and he was hoping that it was just alcohol flush.

Dean smirked, accepting the beer and patting a spot on the bed beside him. “Come on, I’m just messing with you.” He started flipping mindlessly through channels.

Cas hesitantly sat beside him, taking a mouthful of beer and leaning back on his palm. He tried to ignore Dean, his eyes focused on the TV as he flicked through the channels mindlessly, his thumb circling the top of his beer bottle.

“Mm. You wanna order food while I find something? I’ll take a burger and fries," Dean requested, popping off the top of his beer and taking a slow sip.

"Are you alright if I order something as well?" He asked, leaning over to the hotel phone and placing an order for the both of them.

“No, Castiel. I’m not gonna allow you to have dinner.” Dean shook his head. “You don’t have to ask if you can order food. Just...order it.” This hotel had porn channels, but he knew that’d absolutely mortify Cas if he tried to play that. So he’d do it ‘accidentally.’ He kept flipping through, the numbers getting higher and higher until he stumbled upon it, his eyes widening. “Oh, god.”

He froze the second loud sex noises came from the TV, hurriedly ending the call, his cheeks aflame with pure embarrassment. "Dean, what the fuck? Give me the remote!" He all but tackled the rock star, trying to pry it from his hands.

Dean couldn’t help but laugh. “Chill out, chill! It was an accident. I’m just going through every channel! Goddamn.” He switched it off to a sports channel instead, not that he wanted to watch it.

"For fuck’s sake, only you would find the damn porn channel." He scoffed, taking a seat back on his side of the bed. “Sports, huh? Didn't pick you for a fan." 

“I’m not. Just...trying to get away from the porn.” Dean chuckled again. Cas’ reaction was better than he’d expected. He continued to flip through, finding the movies. “Movie? Or is that too long?”

"Good." Porn was something that Cas always felt embarrassed about, even more so with Dean seated next to him. "A movie is fine." Cas nodded, a relaxed smile returning to his face.

Dean nodded. “Ooh one of the Scary Movie movies is on. You ever seen those? They’re absolute garbage, and the best media I’ve ever seen.” He laughed.

Cas shook his head. "No, what are they about?" He asked curiously, tipping his head back and finishing off his beer.

“They’re like, parodies of classic horror movies. Really dumb, and fucking hilarious. And they’re not actually scary if you’re not into horror. In my opinion, it’s better to watch them high, but I didn’t bring anything this trip.”

"Thanks, I will make sure to bring weed next time I come to your hotel room." Cas chuckled, his eyes on the TV as it started.

Dean raised an eyebrow. “You have weed? Shit, I thought you were all uptight about that kinda thing, being a bodyguard and all...”

"I use it to help me sleep; sometimes my insomnia has me up all night. I would ever do it while I'm on the job. Although maybe I would working for you, because fuck, you are high maintenance," Cas teased. "I also smoke in general. But mostly just as a relaxing technique." He didn’t know why he was telling Dean these things he probably didn’t care about; he just...felt like something changed. Their awful evenings had left them in a state of vulnerability with each other.

Dean rolled his eyes, swatting at his shoulder. “Well, smoke with me sometime. That’d be fun!” He brought a couple of pillows closer, leaning back against them and offering the rest to Cas as he continued to sip his beer. “Whenever we get back to my house in LA, I’ve got all kinds of shit there.”

“Uh, yeah. Sure," Cas replied, hit with the realization that would never happen. He was only contracted for the length of the tour. Once they landed back in LA, he would be off to his next job. But obviously Dean didn't know, and that was okay. He didn't have to.

Dean smiled, resting with his hand behind his head. He sat up when there was a knock at the door for room service. “Oh, shit. I really hope they didn’t send up Kandii...” he muttered.

"I will grab it.” Cas hopped up and opened the door, met with a rather stern-looking brunette. He nodded his head to her and allowed her to wheel it in as she looked at the both of them in disapproval before leaving.

“Well geez. She might be the only person I’ve met with a stick farther up her ass than yours.” Dean laughed, uncovering the dishes and setting his burger on a tray on his lap. He set his beer on the nightstand and took a bite of the burger.

Cas rolled his eyes. "No wonder she gave you a disapproving look; you eat like a monster.” He chuckled, grabbing his own fries and burger and sitting beside Dean again. 

“The fuck does that mean?” Dean asked, dipping his fries in some ketchup. He smiled a little when he saw that Cas had ordered the same thing. Maybe they had more in common than he’d originally thought.

"You eat like you just got out of prison. Not sure if you hate that burger or you want to fuck it," He commented, gently lifting off the top of his bun to add fries to it.

“Funny. That’s kinda how I feel about you,” Dean replied without thinking, taking another bite of his burger. “Don’t know what you’re talking about, though. I’m just eating...” he saw Cas put fries in his burger and immediately copied him. It was a smart idea. 

Cas felt his ears burn and he threw a couple of fries at Dean. "You are so gross!" He brought the burger up to his mouth and took a bite.

Dean chuckled, picking them up from where they’d fallen onto the bed and ate them. “Thanks for the fries.” He reached over and grabbed his beer, sipping at it. “Mm. But come on, I know that’s how you feel about me too.”

Cas took another bite of his burger. He had never had this much interest in another guy before, One he wanted to strangle, but also fuck. But he wasn't going to give Dean that satisfaction. So he just rolled his eyes and ignored him.

“I’ll take that as a yes.” Dean grinned. It was fun getting under his skin. He set his empty plate back on the cart once he was finished eating and leaned back against the headboard to focus on the movie.

"Ugh, don't flatter yourself,” He muttered, finishing off his food a little while after Dean, before settling on the bed next to him.

Once the movie ended, Dean turned to look at Cas, clearing his throat. “Y’know, we both had mediocre to terrible sex tonight, right? And maybe a few months from now, it’ll be a great story, but for right now, I’ve got a Hello Kitty g-string in my trash can and I don’t find a single thing about that funny. I had my face buried in a blue butterfly tattoo that would’ve looked classier as a tramp stamp and a girl that was on the verge of calling me granddaddy while I fucked her ass. I don’t wanna have to ever do that again. And I know what you’re gonna say. It’s my fault. I could’ve gotten some other girl, like that brunette that just walked in here looking like she smelled the worst fart in history instead of plastic Paris Hilton, for example. Anyways, my point is, don’t you think I owe it to myself to erase that traumatic experience with good sex?”

Cas found it hilarious but that was something he kept to himself. And sex with Brad was...fine. But the douche named his penis and Cas was beyond done, not wanting to know the form of ridicule he’d receive if he ever told Dean that fact he’d left out.

When Dean finished his little spiel, it took a second for the gears turning over in Cas' head to click and he suddenly felt his blood run cold. Was Dean suggesting...? Surely not. "So, do you want to go to a bar, or....?" Cas took another sip of his beer, eyes on the TV. He swallowed, feeling his heart race a little. This was stupid. Dean was just another guy.

“I’m in my sweatpants. I’m not going anywhere for the rest of the night.” Dean laughed softly. This was becoming sort of a game. “I think you should call room service again and, assuming it’s not Kandii, I ask to fuck whoever brings it and you stand guard. What do you think?”

"If that's what you want," Cas said flatly, his once playful mood darkening. He stood up, dusting off his shirt. Of course, he forgot he was on the job for a minute and for a slight second, he thought it might be him. How foolish. "Do you have a type?"

“Well, I typically go for security guards, but since you made it clear earlier that that’s off the table, l’ll settle for anyone who isn’t saving themselves for marriage.” Dean smirked.

Cas made the call, gritting his teeth at Dean’s little jab at him. "I will stand guard as requested. Do you require anything else?"

Dean should’ve known that strategy wouldn’t work. He didn’t want to fuck some other hotel employee. But it was clear Cas was done with him, and he didn’t want to push too far and have him quit, so he’d do it. “No...” he sighed, defeated.

Cas stood by, having gone silent. If Dean had made any hint of a move on him, it might have been different. But he had made it clear. He wanted to fuck a hotel employee, so that’s what Cas gave him. "A reminder, Mr. Winchester. I will not be standing guard for you tomorrow. Jo has assigned David to keep guard instead," He said sternly, unmoving.

“Mr. Winchester? You’re suddenly so formal.” Dean tried to keep his voice light, but the tone between them had shifted so suddenly. Cas was back to acting like he was when they’d first met. “Okay. I’ll miss you.”

Dean switched off the TV and sat on his bed while he waited for her. He smoothed his fingers along the sheets, tapping them against the mattress. The longer he waited, the more he realized that he really didn’t want to do this. But what was he supposed to say? That this was a failed attempt at reverse-psychology that hadn’t worked because Cas was just as committed and stubborn as he was? And besides, hotel employees weren’t there to be at his disposal, not that he truly realized that. 

“Hey, uh...Cas?” Dean said after a long moment. “Could you...maybe just call and cancel?”

There was a pause before Cas answered. "If you’d like," Cas replied in his monotonous ‘professional’ voice, making his way to the phone to cancel Dean's request. He was tired and just a little bit too sober. The whole mood had dropped and now he just wanted to go. Leave and wallow in his own self-pity. "If you would prefer for me to officially call you Dean on duty, I can." He stated. "Would there be anything else you require of me tonight?"

Dean let out a long sigh in exasperation. This was torture for him. But he wasn’t going to just outright ask him. He could do that with anybody else, but with Cas...with...something that resembled more than just a desire for sex, he couldn’t. “Yeah, just call me Dean. I’ll start...calling you Cas from now on. I’m sorry.” That was the first apology he’d given in as long as he could remember. What was this man doing to him?

“I don’t require anything. But if you want to stay here and maybe...not act like you’re at work for a bit, I wouldn’t mind.”

This was just going to get weird. And weirder. And Cas felt so uncomfortable, he needed something that would break the tension and get them back to how they were, somewhere freeing. 

There was a moment of hesitation. A breath too long. Cas strode over to Dean and grabbed the front of his shirt, pulling him into a jealous, angry kiss to let out his frustrations. 

_Oh thank god_ , was all Dean could think as Cas grabbed him. It was enough to knock the breath out of him completely, but he didn’t hesitate in kissing back, his hands gripping at the fabric of the back of Cas’ shirt, bunching it up in his fists.

Cas straddled Dean's lap and pushed him back into the bed, his body alight with passion and an intense lust he just couldn't contain. He clawed at the sheets, a deep grunt ripping from his throat.

Dean let out a soft groan, more than happy to let Cas do whatever he wanted to him. He bit his lip as he looked up at him, placing his hands on his chest and sliding them down his body to pull at the hem of his shirt.

Cas sat up, fumbling a little as he slipped his shirt off and tossed it aside. He immediately grabbed Dean's shirt, pulling it off and meeting his lips again.

Dean placed his hands on Cas’ hips, lightly squeezing as he bit his bottom lip and tugged. His heart was racing, his pelvis raising to grind eagerly against Cas and he let out another low groan.

Cas had only started this with the intention of an aggressive kiss, but it soon turned into much, much more. He couldn't help himself. Not with Dean moaning under him. He dropped his hips, grinding down onto him with an eager groan, the friction making his jeans tighten. He lifted his hands to push through Dean's hair and pulled, the kiss moving from Dean's lips to down his sweaty neck, leaving open mouthed-kisses and sucking on the skin at the base of his neck. He bit down, leaving a rather obvious hickey.

“Cas...” The soft moan fell from his lips and he couldn’t stop himself. He tilted his head back, wrapping his legs around Cas’ waist and pulling him closer. “Fuck,” he breathed, all the tension from the evening culminating into this moment.

Dean saying his name didn't help, not in the breathy, desperate way he did it. "We shouldn't be doing this-" Cas murmured hurriedly against his skin, but had no intention of stopping, licking from Deans neck up to his earlobe, then catching it between his teeth and pulling.

“I don’t care,” Dean grunted out, soft, desperate cries pouring from his lips as Cas made him melt beneath him. “Fuck, fuck!” His hands slid up from his hips to glide along his abdomen and chest, feeling his heated, muscular body beneath his fingers.

Cas slipped his hands down, suddenly feeling a well of nerves building. _Fuck._ What if he wasn’t really good at sex? What if he was just...okay? What if it got awkward? What if Dean laughed? _Oh fuck_ \---all these thoughts crowded Cas’ mind for a moment, blood rushing to his ears and he tried not to show his nervousness as he stripped Dean out of his sweatpants. It shouldn't matter. Cas always was just there to get himself off. So why did he care what Dean thought?

Dean raised his hips again to help him take them off, his hands moving to undo Cas’ pants. He squirmed a little, eagerness welling up within him. He didn’t exactly know where Cas was going with this, but he was fine with anything. He just had this overwhelming urge to be close to him, a feeling he didn’t recognize.

Watching Dean squirm showed a level of vulnerability he hadn't seen before and he had this sudden urge. He wanted to fuck him, shove him into the bed and continue to make those needy moans pour from his lips. Cas leaned down to breath against Dean's ear, helping him push his jeans off as he pushed his clothed cock against Dean’s. "Ever been fucked before?” He growled softly.

A soft, involuntary whimper fell from Dean’s lips as he heard his question. He slid his hand into Cas’ boxers, lightly caressing his cock as he responded. “Mm. Pretty sure I’ve done just about every sex act you can think of. But that doesn’t mean I’ve been fucked good.” He chuckled lowly, helping him undress completely, then grinding his hips again. Fuck. That felt good.

Cas growled as Dean ground his cock up against his, his length hard and pre-leaking, a pearl of cum slipping down his dick. "Lube. Condom?" Cas asked, wondering if they were as easy to access as just being on the side table. He couldn't wait to have Dean screaming under him. That would be a sound he would never forget. 

And there was the one perk of his encounter with Kandii. Everything they needed was still in the drawer next to the bed. He wouldn’t have to get up and could just keep grinding against Cas. “Mm...top drawer,” he murmured, his voice slurred with pleasure as their cocks continued to slide against each other.

"Fuck, fuck-" Cas wasn’t going to last much longer if Dean kept this up, so he would need a distraction. He reluctantly pulled off Dean, standing up to grab condoms and lube. "On your stomach. Ass up," He instructed as he rolled the condom on, lubing up one of his fingers. It was a process for Cas. A rhythm. Although slightly more exciting, he hadn't ever known any other way. This was what happened when you were 23, no past boyfriends to speak of and only drunk Grindr dates between work since coming out at 21.

Dean nodded, Cas’ moans making him shudder as he obediently rolled onto his stomach and raised his ass in the air. He turned his head to sneak a glance at Cas as he prepared, another shudder running through his body. He couldn’t believe this was happening.

Cas wanted to blame the alcohol as he slid his finger between Dean’s cheeks and pushed it inside slowly, but he couldn't. He was sober, but fucked up on lust. What had Dean done to him? He moved his finger slowly still before pushing in a second, moving to kneel behind Dean as he slapped his ass with his free hand, scissoring him open. As he slid in a third, he leaned over Dean and bit along his shoulder blade, kissing along the skin.

Dean clenched around his fingers a little, letting out breathy grunts as he shoved the side of his face into his pillow, rocking his hips back. When he felt the slap, he yelped and his cock immediately twitched. “Fuck, Cas.” 

And then he felt the kisses, and his head started to spin. He wanted to roll over and grab Cas and kiss him senseless, feel the heat of his lips against his own, but he was in the process of getting fucked, and that was the point of this, wasn’t it? Not to get closer to Cas. Just to get off.

When he was sure Dean was prepped, he pulled his fingers out and coated them generously in lube, wrapping his hand around his hard cock. He lathered himself up, wiping his lubed hand on the sheets before climbing up behind Dean. He pushed his knees apart, pressing his tip at Deans entrance and pushed in slowly, letting out a deep, guttural moan. "Fuck, you are so tight. And warm. Fuck-" Cas growled, his voice dropping an octave lower. He leaned over Dean, one hand on his hip and the other gripping the headboard as he started off his slow, deep pulses inside him.

“Oh my god...” Dean had his breath knocked out of him and he struggled to stop his knees from buckling as soon as he felt Cas enter him. “Fuck...am I?” He groaned, hearing him talk like that drove Dean crazy. He pushed his ass back to meet every thrust, his head tossing back. “Faster, please...”

"Yeah. Fucking sexy." He moaned, his breath hot against Dean's neck. He would go faster; he just had to find that bundle of nerves that would have Dean coming and screaming for more. He rolled his hips, adjusting them bit by bit until he found it.

“Mmf...” Everything about Cas made him moan. His words, his hot breath, his perfectly timed thrusts and the grip of his fingers on his hips. Dean was done for. He let out a near scream when his prostate was struck, his ass clenching around him again as his breathing grew ragged.

“Fucking hell! Oh my fucking shit, Cas!” He howled, reaching down to cup his hand over his cock so he didn’t make a huge mess on the bed. “I’m gonna...gonna..OOH!” The most powerful orgasm he could ever remember having rocked through his body and he came hard into his awaiting palm, his legs trembling until they could no longer support his weight and he collapsed.

The second Dean started crying out in pleasure, his name caught between Dean’s teeth, he knew he was finished. He fucked into his ass harder, faster and the second Dean came, he let out a final moan and he joined him, his head dizzy as he filled the condom. _Holy fuck-_ he had never had a partner that made him want to come back for more before. But there Dean was, collapsed on the bed, hand full of cum, and the last thing he wanted to do was run out the door.

He probably shouldn't have, but he couldn't help himself. What did Cas love more than blowjobs, was the cum that came after. He caught Dean's wrist and licked his palm clean, sliding one of Dean's fingers inside his mouth for a moment, his tongue caressing the skin before pulling it out.

Without another word, Cas got up with a grunt to peel off the condom and clean up.

Dean rolled onto his back, his chest heaving as he watched Cas lick his hand clean. He nearly had an aneurysm when his finger was slid into Cas’ mouth, his spent cock twitching once more from aftershocks.

He watched him walk away, his heart thundering in his ears as his gaze turned to the ceiling. There were so many thoughts running through his head at that moment. And maybe it was because he mostly only had sex while drunk or high, but that was the best he could remember having.

After Cas had cleaned himself up, he took a moment to calm down. That was the worst thing he could have possibly done but holy shit, that was the best sex he ever had. He was still high from the pleasure, Dean’s moans echoing loudly in his ears.

He finally gathered himself enough to seem rather casual, trying to keep the really dumb smile from his face. He flopped down on the bed next to Dean. "Well, that was better than earlier," He breathed out. Better was a definite understatement. Incredible? Fucking amazing? World shattering?

“Meh,” Dean replied with a smirk, scooting over to rest his head on Cas’ chest. “Better than earlier really isn’t saying much, though. But you beat ‘princess’ ass tattoo for sure.” He chuckled, raising his head to meet Cas’ eyes.

“Thank you. You might be the first person to have sex with me for reasons other than my fame. And that uh...well, I didn’t think it’d make a difference, but if kinda does.”

"Better than meh." He rolled his eyes, nudging Dean gently. He was going to say something sarcastic, but the look on Dean's face meant he was serious. He reached down and laced his fingers gently with Dean’s, squeezing it just a touch. Weirdly, it felt more intimate than the sex they’d just had. "You are welcome," he murmured.

Dean couldn’t help but smile a little, glancing down at their hands. This was extremely weird for him, but not in a bad way. His free hand gently traced lines and shapes into Cas’ chest and he let out a soft sigh.

“Can we just go ahead and skip the ‘this is never gonna happen again’ conversation?” Dean asked. “Because we only lasted a few hours since the last time we said that. I’m pretty sure it is.”

"I will keep telling myself it won't happen again, but you are right." He sighed, letting his eyes fall closed. It was what it was. And he wanted to do it again and again, and keep telling himself it was harmless. That this meant nothing to him. But deep, deep down he knew that wasn't true.

“I just think that we both tried to distract ourselves today by being with someone else, and it sucked. But being with you didn’t suck. Well, it did literally, but that’s not my point.” Dean laughed a little. He could never pass up a crude joke like that. “So...what’s the harm in good sex, right? I mean we already have an excuse for being alone together. As long as we don’t act differently around other people, we’ll be fine.”

"Security guard with benefits. I understand, Dean; it's okay." He smiled softly, his eyelashes fluttering open as he tilted his head to look at Dean properly. He adjusted himself on the mattress a little, letting out a content sigh.

“Exactly.” Dean gave his hand another light squeeze, then instinctively leaned up to kiss him softly. “Mm. I’m gonna be walking funny tomorrow, I’ll tell you that. And the flight probably won’t help.”

It was weird to receive a gentle kiss like that, but Cas brushed over it. And Dean’s lips felt nice, no longer hungry, but instead affectionate. "Mm, and I will know it’s from me and that's hot. And this as well." He gently brushed his fingers over the wound on his neck.

“That is pretty fucking hot.” Dean smirked a little, tilting his head back. “Mhm. It’s too bad I can’t give you one. But you’re free to mark me up all you want. No one’ll ask questions.”

"And why can't you give me one?" He asked, moving to look at Dean properly. His blue eyes lifted to meet his green ones, his thumb dragging over the back of his hand gently.

“Mm, because you’d probably get in trouble if anyone saw you with bruises on your neck.” Dean felt his breath catch in his throat when his eyes met Cas’. They were a gorgeous, startling blue and he hadn’t really noticed before.

"It doesn't have to be on my neck." He said, caught up in Deans gaze for a moment before he snapped out of it and dragged his eyes away.

Dean bit his lip, continuing to trace small shapes into his chest with his index finger. “Mm. Alright. Where do you want it then?”

Cas hadn’t had a hickey before. But he wouldn’t tell Dean that. So instead he just answered, "stomach. Thighs. You choose." He stretched his hands back to link his fingers and dropped them beneath his head to sit up a little.

“Gotcha.” Dean slowly got up and crawled down Cas’ body, glancing up at him before taking his left leg and moving it out to the side. He lay on his stomach between his legs, finding the crease where his hip met his thigh and fitting his lips around the skin. He kissed first, then started to suck until a bright red spot appeared. 

Cas had never laid bare like this in front of anyone before. So naked, so open. He tried not to feel embarrassed at first, but any kind of thought fell out the window as soon as Dean kissed his skin. It was interesting, and hot, and pleasurable. _Fuck._ 'Hng-'' Cas breathed out just a touch.

Dean smirked, watching the expression on Cas’ face turn before he pulled back, his nose gently nudging at his cock. “Mm. You liked that? You want more?”

Cas swallowed thickly, panting as his heavy eyelids drooped a little. "Mm, yes," He breathed out lazily.

Dean moved to his right side, licking slowly along his inner thigh until he reached his hip, sucking firmly at the skin there for a few seconds. He traced his tongue over the hickey once he was finished, proud of his work.

Cas bit his lip, chewing on it as he lifted his hips just a touch. He reached down and skimmed his fingers through Dean's hair. "Feels good.”

Dean would cover him head to toe in hickeys if he could, his lips trailing up to a spot just beneath his rib cage on his side. He made another mark there, kissing every inch of skin he passed on his way there. He didn’t know what was happening to him, but he wanted to worship Cas’ body.

Cas melted, his fingers gently massaging Dean’s scalp. If this is what it meant to be friends with benefits, he was cool with that. He moaned out Dean's name softly, arching his back up just a touch.

Dean licked his lips as he pulled back to make eye contact with Cas once again. He was intoxicating, and the moans he let spill from his lips were almost too much for him to handle. “Now you’re all marked up by me and no one’ll ever know.” He smirked.

It was like their own dirty secret, being tucked away under a light veiling of clothes. "Mm-" Cas breathed out in response, his gaze dropping to meet Dean’s eye line. He had such stunning green eyes? Why was it only now Cas saw it? _Fuck_ he could lay here all night, letting Dean do whatever he wanted to his body.

Dean climbed back up to rest his head upon Cas’ shoulder. He almost never had a strong desire to be close with someone after sex, but this felt different for some reason. He felt a lump begin to form in his throat when they made eye contact again...his eyes. Dean could write a song about them. But he wouldn’t. He never wrote love songs. 

“Cas...” he trailed off, words he didn’t know how to properly articulate stuck on the tip of his tongue. “I don’t want to stop this.” He now had something he was afraid to lose. 

Cas gingerly wrapped an arm around Dean, his fingers finding a way to trace down the back of Dean’s spine. He let his fingertips linger over him, tracing mindless patterns over his skin. It was just sex? So why did he still not want to slip out the door and run?

Cas shifted a little, not expecting Dean’s words. "I-'' It took the usually articulate male a second to finish his trail of thought. "We don't have to," he finally managed to say. He hated to admit it out loud, but he would keep inevitably dragging himself back to Dean, whether he wanted to or not.

“Good.” A small smile formed on Dean’s lips as he curled up into Cas’ arms. “I’ll make sure you don’t get in trouble for this, alright? You don’t have to worry.”

He reached down, wrapping his hand around his cock and bringing his lips to Cas’ ear. “Oh! It’s so big...can’t believe it fit...” he mocked, then broke out laughing.

Cas smiled a little, not even bothering to roll his eyes at Dean’s stupid joke as he kept rubbing his back. It was so easy for him, he could just be like, ‘Cas is my new fucktoy.’ But how awful would this look? The hateful stares, the judgement. Getting a job after this would be near impossible if word spread that Cas was a gold-digging unprofessional.

"Hey Dean, I’m kinda tired," He lied, needing some time to think without what could only be the sexiest man alive spread out on top of him.

“Mm, okay.” Dean pulled back, curling his head back into the crook of his neck. “Did you wanna stay here tonight or go back to your room? I’m uh...I’m fine either way. Up to you.”

He should go back to his room. He knew he should. "I can stay here." He hated sleeping alone. He wanted to lay there and just relish in the added warmth, just for that night. Just to take it all in before he had to vanish when the sun came up.

“Okay.” Dean tried to hide the smile on his face. He leaned down to grab the blankets that’d been shoved to the foot of the bed and tugged them up, pulling them over both of them as his head returned to rest on Cas’ chest. This was nice, he had to admit.

He tried to ignore the feeling of warmth and murmured a soft “goodnight” before closing his eyes. He prayed for sleep or some kind of rest.

“Night,” Dean replied, stretching himself out across Cas as he slowly fell asleep. It’d been a weird day, both good and bad, and he was relieved it was over. And draped over Cas like this, it was the best sleep he’d had in months.


	7. Paris

Cas didn't sleep at all. He’d stayed up most of the night, drowning in thoughts and feelings he didn't quite understand. It was just past 5am when he slipped out from under Dean, got dressed in the dark, and swiftly made his way back to his own room.

He tried sleeping some more, but couldn't, so he instead tried to go for a run around 6 to tire himself out, but that didn't go as planned. No amount of exercise could quiet his mind enough to let him sleep. Luckily, it was his day off and Jo’s only instruction was that he was to meet them on the tarmac for takeoff at 11, So he packed up and showered, out of the hotel by 8 to hopefully find some shred of distraction.

He was at the tarmac early, and luckily the pilot recognized the scruffy, very tired looking male. He let him on early and Cas went up to the back and shoved in his earphones, hoping sleep would finally grace him.

***

Dean woke up to his scheduled alarm just after 8, rolling over and frowning when he realized that Cas was gone. He hadn’t expected it this time, and it hurt a little. But he had a plane to catch and get ready for, and he hoped it wouldn’t be awkward when he saw him on the flight. But he got the message. Their agreement was sex, nothing more. And he was fine with that. He should be fine with that.

He turned back to his pillow and passed out again, waking up a while later to the clock blaring 10am. “Oh, shit!” He was going to get yelled at, again. He knew it. He forced himself out of bed and into the shower, trying to distract himself. He didn’t know what he was going to say to Cas, but it was a Wednesday, so he didn’t have to see him much. But that meant time with the other security, including Jo. And she intimidated the hell out of him.

He then packed his things and got dressed, messily cramming everything into his suitcase and praying it would zip. He wore his normal airplane leggings and long t-shirt. He then put on a baseball cap and sunglasses as well and opened the door, finding David.

David was placed in charge of Dean in Cas’ absence, and he stood guard outside Dean's room, arms folded in front of his chest. He was in his mid-50s, covered in tattoos and could very clearly fuck someone up.

“Uh, hey. I’m ready.” He was always a little intimidated by the security team, but they were there for his benefit, he tried to remind himself, and if they were scary to him, they definitely were to his fans.

"Quite the sleep in this morning, Mr. Winchester," David said gruffly, offering to take his bags. 

“What can I say? I had a long night.” Dean smirked, heading to the elevators as he handed off his suitcase and backpack. The rest of his clothes and equipment were with his makeup and style crew, so he didn’t have to worry about much.

"Jo said to head straight to the airport; we will collect your belongings and meet you there. Would you like me to escort you to your limo?" He offered. He knew it was too early in the morning for Dean to attract unwanted attention between there and the lobby.

“Yeah, sure.” Dean sighed. He needed coffee, or something. His mind felt clouded, his thoughts more turbulent than the flight he was dreading. He was silent the rest of the way to the lobby and out the revolving doors, no longer bragging about his parties or conquests of the night before as he usually did. 

“Thanks.” Dean climbed into the limousine and stretched out along the seat. His mind automatically went to Cas, wishing he was in the car with him. He chewed his lip, willing himself to think otherwise.

***

Cas had given up once again, resorting to drawing mindlessly in his notebook. He didn't even think about it, his pencil just moving along the pages, when he realized he had drawn a rough sketch of Dean.  _ Ah fuck- _ what was wrong with him? He looked up as Jo and the other security detail got on, and he quickly flipped to a new page. She handed the updated schedules and shot Cas a dirty look. He was confused, but just assumed she was in one of her moods, so he brushed it off.

Dean’s limo arrived at the airport and he was escorted to the plane, his feet dragging. His eyes met Cas’ for a brief moment as he boarded and he felt a slight pang in his chest. What had he done wrong?

Cas' eyes dropped the second they made contact and he immediately knew Dean was in a mood as well. He averted his attention to his phone, flicking mindlessly through music as they took off, going back to his book.

Dean’s medication was waiting with a glass of water beside his seat and he gratefully took it, sitting down and shutting the curtain around him, wishing the rest of the world could be shut out with him. 

He closed his eyes, leaning back in his seat and trying to relax. It was a much shorter flight than the last one they’d taken, but he was still extremely nervous, and his tumultuous feelings regarding Cas weren’t helping.

***

When the plane landed in Paris, the dark dreary clouds that loomed above clearly reflected the mood of the passengers.

Dean sighed, opening his eyes as Lisa shook him awake and he was escorted off the plane. It was a dreary, gloomy day and that was exactly how he felt, but he wasn’t sure why. He was fed, fucked, and relaxed while on the plane, but he still felt horrible. He dragged his feet to the waiting limo and climbed inside, taking a handful of candy from a small, glass bowl in the cup holder.

It became clear to Dean that Cas was avoiding him. He’d probably realized this was all a mistake and Dean had made things awkward. He was afraid Cas was going to quit. He chewed his lip, hoping no one else caught onto his poor mood. He didn’t have an excuse to give them.

He had a performance that night. He couldn’t spend the day sulking, so he put on a fake smile, trudging up to his hotel room and throwing himself onto the bed. He was in a different country, but all hotel rooms looked the same. Too many reminders of the night before and he found himself missing his home, and the days before he met Cas, though that’d been less than a week ago.

He had to be at the concert venue in less than an hour, but Dean was still in bed, still in his plane clothes, refusing to move or get dressed or do anything. Security would have to break in and drag him out by his ankles. It wasn’t that he didn’t want to do the show. He loved performing, but he didn’t want to get out of bed. He felt like there was an invisible weight holding him there, pressing in on him.

His thoughts were interrupted by a loud bang at the door. "Dean!" Jo yelled. "You have a show in less than an hour; what are you doing?"

“Fuck off!” Dean called back, startled. He wanted the whole universe to just fuck off.

"Oh for fuck’s sake,” she grumbled through the door. She knew there was only one person who could get him to listen.

Moments later there was a, "Dean?" followed by a softer knock, this time accompanying a male voice. 

“What? You done avoiding me?” Dean snapped. He kept his face shoved into his pillow so his own voice came out muffled. “There’s a difference between ‘day off’ and ‘pretending I don’t exist,’ you know.” He got up reluctantly and opened the door.

“I’m not gonna miss the concert. I just don’t wanna fucking deal with Jo,” he explained as he let Cas in, looking out the door and down the hall to make sure she was gone.

"I wasn't...avoiding you," Cas muttered, his eyes lifting to meet Dean's. "You are acting like a baby. Go to your damn concert," he snapped, clearly annoyed.

“Oh, you weren’t? So me waking up alone this morning without even the decency of a note or a text message and then you looking away whenever I tried to make eye contact with you isn’t avoiding me?”

Dean unzipped his suitcase, stripping out of his plane clothes and into his leather pants as he spoke. “If you changed your mind or need some time away from me or whatever, just tell me. You’re the one acting like a goddamn baby.”

"I’m a casual fuck to you, Dean. Why the hell does it even matter?" He growled, brows furrowing. "I'm just the security guy you have random hook-ups with. So why do you care?"

Dean sighed. “It’s not an excuse to treat me like garbage. I’m still your boss.” He shook his head. “Whatever. I don’t care. See you tomorrow.”

He swiftly left his hotel room and headed down to the awaiting car, leaving Cas standing there with the door open. He didn’t have the energy to engage any further, and being on stage would cheer him up. It always did.

Cas' face fell. He hadn’t thought of that. He’d never done this before. It was all so new to him and he felt a well of guilt curling inside him for how he’d treated Dean. But that was his problem, he never thought. And by the time Cas went to say something, Dean was gone.

Before leaving, he took the notepad and pen on Dean's nightstand and scribbled, 

_ Call me. Hope the concert went well. -Cas _

***

Dean was right. He did feel better onstage. It felt like where he belonged, the bright lights and roar of the crowd. He took a minute to soak it in before he began.

“Good evening, Paris! Or should I say, Buenas noches!” Well...that was a bit embarrassing. But no one seemed to care. The audience took it as a joke.

The concert went smoothly, no security threats this time, and he was grateful that David didn’t have to tackle anyone off the stage. He was refreshed, adrenaline pumping through his body. It was almost as if he’d absorbed all the excitement from the crowd.

It came time for the after party and he hopped into the limo that’d take him back to his hotel room where things were being set up for him, wondering who would be put in charge of it this time, when lo and behold, he found David waiting for him, standing rigidly outside his door with a stern expression.

_ Great,  _ Dean thought. At least he wouldn’t be inside the room. He was feeling better, but still wasn’t exactly in the mood to party, especially when he found the note Cas had left on his nightstand. He quickly slid it into one of the drawers before the guests began to show up. French girls. Why wasn’t he more excited?

David checked all the girls, running through the usual procedure of making sure they had no recording devices or phones on them, then let them in.

“Bonjour, ladies.” Dean chuckled, sitting on the bed as they surrounded him. The party started as usual. He played a song, they drank, then the clothes came off and he was surrounded by each of them competing for his attention. And in his alcohol-induced haze, he almost forgot all about Cas. Almost.

***

In place of the usual concert, Cas had spent most of his day wandering mindlessly around Paris and didn’t return to the hotel until well after 8, pizza and beer in hand as he checked in and made his way to his room. 

He almost jumped when he heard someone call out, "Hey, Clarence, right?” He spun around and was met with a dirty-blonde woman in a biker jacket and all black. Her curls fell down over her face, and she had a seemingly tattooed smirk across her lips. It took a second for him to place her. Another one of Dean's security guards. 

“Oh. Uh, Meg right?" He asked and she grinned, taking the beer from his hand. 

"Mm, didn't think you would know my name. Winchester has been hogging you all to himself. Has he made you his new little pet yet?"

His stomach dropped but he did his best to make it seem like he wasn’t phased. "Can I help you?"

"Oh, Jo gave me the night off. So I thought I would spend it with you. Is this for me?" She took the pizza and brushed past him into his hotel room.

"Sure. Let yourself in." He muttered, closing the door with a sigh. He couldn't get any peace and quiet. 

They spent the rest of the evening together, talking in his hotel room, and it was weird, but he actually really liked her. They got along well; she liked some of the same music and had a similar shitty childhood. They drank beer, ate pizza and watched a rom-com, something Cas loved despite Meg’s whines about how awful it was. It was easy to forget about his feelings for Dean when he could instead immerse himself in someone else’s problems for a night. 

As it crept well after 10, he kicked her out. Cas curled up on the firm mattress and fell asleep by his phone, notebook cuddled to his chest. He would loathe himself in the morning for acting like a dumb kid with a crush, but for the time being, he’d finally welcomed sleep. 

***

Cas was up early once again. No rest for the weary. He got up and dressed to go for another run. Picking up his phone to check his messages, he found a missed call from Dean. He frowned, wondering what drunken mess of a message was left for him.

_ “Hi, Castiel. You said to call you...so hi. I had a fun party, oh man. Can’t wait to tell you about it. I had like...five pairs of tits in my face at the same tim-” _

The second Dean started talking about the naked women, Cas hung up and deleted it, pushing in his headphones. He went for a run, had breakfast and then he went back to his room and showered, dressed and by 8, he was outside Dean's room, taking over from David with a soft thanks. 

As it crept on 10 and Dean still hadn’t made any move toward coming out of his room, Cas slipped in to stand by the door. He gently closed it behind himself, his eyes falling upon the rock star who was shamelessly drooling all over his pillow. 

"Classy," He muttered, walking in and throwing a blanket over Dean's naked waist, then tidying up the empty bottles littering the floor from the night before.

Dean was woken up by Cas walking in and he slowly picked his head up, wincing. “Oh, hey. Did you get my voicemail? Or did I just dream about sending you one?” He slurred, rubbing his eyes, then sitting up, making the blanket fall off.

"I did. I assume you had fun,” Cas murmured, careful not to look at an exposed Dean as he gently dropped the bottles in the trash. He headed over to the nightstand and placed a bottle of water and aspirin on it for him.

“Yeah, I guess. Did you uh...happen to listen to the entire voicemail?” Dean asked, trying to keep his voice nonchalant as he grabbed a pair of boxers and tugged them on, then took the aspirin.

"No. After you told me about how many naked women you had in your room, I assumed the rest of the voicemail would just be bragging about your rockstar, party conquest so I stopped." He answered, leaning against the wall.

“Yep, that’s all it was,” Dean said quickly, thankful that he hadn’t heard any more of it, considering he vaguely remembered droning on like an idiot about missing Cas. “So you told me to call you...what did you wanna talk to me about?” He looked over at him, finding it borderline hilarious that even after they’d had sex, Cas still looked away.

Cas tucked his hands into his pockets, taking a moment to find his words. He’d felt so guilty all night, thinking he had really hurt Dean's feelings. But Dean had carried on like he usually did: women, drugs and booze. So why should Cas care? But he was going to be the bigger person. 

His eyes dipped to Dean. "I'm sorry I left without writing a note. I assumed with how many people filtered in and out of here, it wouldn't matter if I left." It was more of a backhanded apology, but it was the best Dean was going to get for the moment. Cas was pissed, and stupidly jealous for absolutely no reason.

“Apology accepted.” Dean shook his head. “But don’t tell me you wouldn’t do the exact same thing if you could. Everyone has needs and I’m getting so many mixed signals from you, I needed to distract myself. And if girls wanna throw themselves at me and make me feel good about myself, that puts me in control. It makes me feel good. But you act like a completely different person when you’re in bed with me from when you’re not. Make up your mind. You’re either in this or you’re not.”

"What do you want me to do? I’m here for you to fuck. Do you want me to throw myself at you? Grow attached to you? Just so I can look like an idiot who has a crush on his boss? I know how this works," He said, his voice sharp.

“No.” Dean tried to remain calm, not wanting the entire hotel to hear their argument. “You don’t have to throw yourself at me, but you don’t have to act cold to me either. There’s a middle ground, right? I get it. We’re both using each other and I’m fine with that, but you don’t have to be a dick. I like that you’re not obsessed with me, actually. It’s refreshing. But don’t berate me for enjoying the people who are.”

"Fine, middle ground, whatever." Cas was still angry and he was trying to stay calm. Because he wasn't sure if he wanted to punch Dean into a wall or slam him into the mattress, and that very thin, confusing line was what was truly pissing him off.

“Awesome.” Dean grabbed his phone, looking at his schedule. He was ready to drop the discussion. “I don’t have another show until tomorrow night, so it looks like we can be tourists another day. City of love, huh? How about that?”

"Mm," Cas hummed, needing a moment. He took a breath before answering, "I'm here to serve you, Dean. Whatever you want to do."

“God, why does it turn me on so much to hear you say that?” Dean chuckled. “What’d you do last night? Anyone interesting?”

"I didn't have sex with anyone, Dean. I just spent the night in my room, with Meg," He answered before half shrugging. 

Dean raised an eyebrow. The concept of being alone in a hotel room with a woman and not sleeping with her was completely foreign to him. “Wow. Sounds...fun. Glad you’re making friends.” He wasn’t sure what else to say to that. “But I’d be careful. I know you wouldn’t, but to the other security guards, that might look suspicious.” 

“So did you walk out of the room in the middle of the night, or did you tell her you were leaving?”

Cas shot Dean a dirty look. "She left my room. And you know what? She got up, said ‘see ya,’ and walked out. Imagine that, not getting offended because she didn't write me a note."

“At least she said goodbye and didn’t just casually slip out after you fell asleep.” Dean shrugged.

Cas glowered, grabbing a pillow and throwing it at Dean. "You are petty and impossible. God, you make me want to choke you." 

Dean put his hands over his face to shield himself, the pillow bouncing off of him and landing at his feet. “Yeah, I’m petty, but so are you. You wanna choke me? Go ahead. Then you can explain to Jo what happened to me. Unless you mean like...choking me in a sexy way. I’m all for that.”

Cas rolled his eyes. "Of course you are into that. Pervert," he muttered, scowling a little and moving back to lean against his wall. How was it Dean knew how to push all his buttons down at the same time? He was going to kill him before he had even had breakfast.

“So you don’t have any kinks, Cas?” Dean thought he looked sort of cute with the frustrated look on his face. “I bet it’d be so satisfying for you to choke me, though. And if me thinking that makes me a pervert, I’m a pervert.”

"Kinks? Like what?" He furrowed his eyebrows. He didn't experiment at all with sex. It was get in, get out. Nothing fancy. "And it would be satisfying, because then maybe you would stop saying shit that makes me crazy."

“Come on. Don’t tell me you’re vanilla. Like...using toys, being restrained in some way, being called certain names...I mean you spanked me the other night, so I thought you might be into stuff like that.”

Honestly, the spanking was weirdly a fluke. He tried it; it was hot and Dean seemed to like it. Cas clenched his jaw, embarrassed as he muttered, "none of your business." Of course Cas was vanilla. You could only taste what you had been given.

“How is it none of my business to ask what you like in bed if I’m having sex with you? Excuse me for trying to figure out what you might like. You’re so damn stubborn. Would it help if I told you what I’m into?”

Cas' nostrils flared. God, Dean was impossible and he had just stumped poor Cas with logic. "It- ugh. No. Because I don't want to hear your mile long list from tits in your face to someone pissing on you, okay? Not the best way for me to start the day," he said, hoping that it would sidetrack Dean enough to drop the topic entirely. He knew Dean would laugh at the fact he didn't know and he wasn't in the head space to go through that at the moment.

“Okay first of all, tits in my face isn’t a kink. That’s just being attracted to women. And second of all, gross. I’m not into water sports. But fine. Let’s not talk about the things that we like to do in bed. Sounds like a really healthy sexual relationship.” Dean sighed. “Could you order me some breakfast, please?”

Cas was being stubborn, he knew that. And he owed it to Dean, after all, he had upset him. "Fine. I will tell you. But if you laugh, I swear to god I will set you on fire, okay?" He said, letting out a hesitant huff.

“Strangely enough, that actually isn’t one of my kinks.” Dean chuckled. “Judgement-free zone. But I would still like some breakfast.”

"Fine." Cas moved over to the phone, placing an order for a continental breakfast; it seemed like something Dean would want. He hung up and took a moment before answering, "I-I don't know if I have any," he said quietly, not meeting Dean's gaze.

“Oh.” Dean considered his response for a moment, genuinely surprised. “That’s not what I thought you were gonna say at all. I’m kinda relieved, actually. I thought you were gonna tell me something super weird or gross that you were into. Not...that I wouldn’t be okay with that...but, y’know...” he trailed off. “That’s the best answer you could’ve given me, Cas. Because now I have the very fun job of helping you figure that out.”

Cas nodded a little. He hadn’t thought of it like that. He was curious about what kind of things there might be to try but he wasn't going to say anything. He was still embarrassed despite Dean’s reassurance, scratching his cheek a little and mumbling a soft, “thanks.”

“You’re welcome.” Dean smiled. “I’m shameless, Cas. I’m sure you know that by now. I may give you plenty of shit, but I’d never embarrass you. Especially about sex. I’m gonna figure this out with you. Of course, I don’t really have any...equipment with me. But Paris is kinda known for sex shops, so we’re lucky.”

"S-sex shops? Oh god, you aren't going to spend the whole day in them are you?" Cas breathed out. Surely, Dean wouldn't drag him from place to place looking at dildos. "Maybe, I could interest you with something else?" He offered. Hell, if he could entertain Dean, he may spare him the red-faced embarrassment of going into those shops.

“You’re interesting, Cas. You can pin me to a bed and make me scream for you, but act all shy and sheepish when I bring up sex toys.” Dean smiled. “No. If you really don’t want to I won’t force you, but they are fun. What’d you have in mind?”

Sex in general was something Cas was always shy about until he was caught up in the moment. "What I tell you, won't leave this room? Right?" He asked, chewing on his cheek.

“Of course not. What’s one more secret between us, right?” Dean scooted closer to him, intrigued. Cas looks really serious about this.

"You said I wouldn’t know what it's like to have people throw themselves at me and adore me, right?" Cas moved closer to Dean, looking down at the man on the bed. It took him a moment before he straddled Dean's hips, pressing his fingers into his shoulders, "I...before I was a security guard, I was, a...stripper."

Dean gulped, looking up at him with wide eyes. Instant boner. “You were...no fucking way. You? Mr. uptight prude?” His jaw dropped. “Sorry, sorry. That was mean. I just, wow. You’re full of surprises.”

"From the age of 17 I started, had to fake an ID, and kept going until I was about 20. Quite a long time really," He murmured. “I spent a lot of my teen years coke-fucked and naked."

“Geez.” Dean didn’t know what to say to that. But the more he learned about Cas, the more he liked him. “That’s quite a career change.”

Cas shook his head a little; he didn't want to talk about that. Instead, he took Dean's hand and gently hooked it around his belt buckle loop, sitting up a little to roll his hips back as the belt slid out from his denim jeans. He slipped the leather up and put it between his lips, biting down and eyeing Dean.

Dean placed his hands on Cas’ hips, letting out a slight grunt. “Fuck...that’s sexy. I’m not a stripper, but I’ve taken a bunch of dance lessons. So maybe I’d be good at it.”

"You think so?" Cas asked, now seemingly amused. "Should I teach you some moves? You might enjoy it." He whipped his belt against the carpet before discarding it entirely. "Might be fun?"

Dean couldn’t help but let out a slight moan. “Hell yes. But my breakfast’s probably gonna be here soon.” He gently squeezed Cas’ hips. “What was your stripper name?”

“Fuck no. I am never telling you that." He chuckled. "It was not a name I was proud of."

“Aw, come on. You tell me all this, but leave out the best part? That’s not fair.” Dean lightly tugged on his belt loops. “Mm. Too bad there’s not a pole in here.”

“Well, just know that I have a pink snap off g-string encrusted in diamonds with my ridiculous name on it." He felt comfortable enough to tell Dean that much, which he didn't know was something he would ever be okay with doing.

“I think I’m gonna have to see that sometime. Or just you in a g-string in general.” He slid his hands up to rest on Cas’ chest. “This might surprise you given my track record, but I’ve never fucked a stripper. So you’re very special.”

"Really? You are right. That's...very surprising. But you mean a stripper has never fucked you," He corrected, a small smirk on his face.

When he got into this, he got into it. He disregarded any prudish thoughts and his inner stripper, his sexually perverted self, surfaced. It was something he usually shoved down but , but right now, in front of Dean, he couldn't help it.

“Yeah, yeah. But that’s mainly because the only strippers I’ve talked to have been on duty and there are policies or whatever.” Dean scoffed. 

"Maybe I should fix that, then.” Cas smirked dangerously. “Wear that pretty g string and then fuck you in it."

Dean placed his hands on Cas’ shoulders, biting his lip. “I’d like that a lot. You bring it with you?”

Cas lived out of his duffel bag. So of course it was tucked into one of the deep pockets. "Yes. I did."

He climbed off Dean's lap and straightened up as someone knocked. Cas answered the door, wheeling in the food cart as the French hotel room attendant made eyes at Dean.

“Ooh.” Dean bounced a little on the bed in excitement. The idea of Cas in a g-string sent all kinds of thoughts running through his head. He waved flirtatiously at the attendant, taking the tray off the cart and opening the lid.

Cas thanked her and gently closed the door as she left all flustered and shy. Cas kept tidying while Dean ate, the mess of the room doing his head in.

Dean looked over at Cas as he started his breakfast, smirking a little while watching him clean. “Mm. Look at you go. Should get you in one of those sexy little maid outfits.”

Cas rolled his eyes. "You are honestly such a mess. How do all these empty bottles on your floor not bother you?" He huffed before standing up, pushing his fingers through his hair.

Dean shrugged. “I had a party last night, passed out, then woke up when you came in. Didn’t get a chance to do anything about it yet. Hop off my dick.”

Cas finished discarding off the bottles with a satisfied sigh. He then moved over to his spot and leaned against the wall as Dean ate, tucking his hands into his pockets as he took a moment to breathe.

It seemed like Cas had reverted back to his non-sexual persona. The sudden change was sort of striking to Dean. Once he finished eating, he wiped his mouth on a napkin and pushed the cart over to beside the door. Dean sat back on the edge of the bed, looking up at Cas expectantly. “You done being my housekeeper?”

"Yes." Cas answered. He hid a small smile. He wanted Dean to ask for it, to tell him what he wanted. Dean always wanted everyone else to do things for him, but if he wanted stripper Cas, he would have to ask.

“Alright then.” Dean patted his knee. “Get over here. Show me some moves.”

"Show you some moves? Or teach you some?" He asked, moving closer to Dean, "I can teach you; it's not too hard to learn the basics." He offered, gesturing for him to stand up.

“Sure. One sec.” Dean went over to his suitcase and pulled on a tightly fitted tank top. “Alright.” He stood in front of Cas, eager to learn.

"So let's start off slow, okay? Just a simple body roll. Watch.” Cas showed him his perfected body roll, his back and hips moving fluidly. “Lift your chin up, push your chest forward and arch your back, and let that movement continue down to your hips. Start with big movements until you get comfortable with it." Cas smiled a little, moving to give Dean space to try.

Dean nodded, tilting up his chin and rolling from his spine down to his hips. He felt kinda stupid, but he didn’t say anything to Cas. Of course, it looked hot when Cas did it. He tried it a few more times, moving to stand in front of the mirror so he could watch himself, one of his favorite pastimes.

"Here, you are being a little rigid. Be more fluid. You want to think sexy. Draw their eyes from yours to your chest and down to your belt," He told Dean, standing behind him. 

“Mm, maybe it’d be easier if you held my hips and helped me move.” He knew how to grind. This was similar, just not necessarily with someone behind him. But having Cas behind him would help. “It’s hard to be sexy if you’re thinking about it, you know?”

“I know." Cas moved to stand behind Dean, his eyes meeting him in the mirror. "Now try." He murmured, his fingers brushing over Dean's sharp hip bones sensually.

Dean let out a breath, raising his hands up and back to gently grasp the sides of Cas’ face as he rolled his body back, his ass pushing against Cas’ hips. “Like that?”

"Yeah," Cas breathed out, licking his lips and trying to remain focused despite how fucking hot that was.

“Okay, next move." He tried to stay on task. "Let’s try the Wine next. It's like you are hula hooping, but with a small hoop. So put your feet shoulder width apart, bend your knees a touch and rotate your hips in a circular motion."

“Sounds easy enough.” Dean stood in the position he was instructed, rotating his hips around slowly, then a little faster. “What do I do with my arms?”

"Emphasize your hips; draw attention to them with your hands. There is so much you can do but a good beginner step is to place your hands like this."

He showed Dean, moving close so he was almost pressed against Dean's back. "Now try again, nice and slow." 

Dean smirked a little and turned to face Cas, placing his palms on his chest and standing arm’s-width apart as he rotated his hips again. “Sexy?”

"Mm, sink into it. Yep, Now you are sexy. Trust me, you could be the worst at stripping but if you act like you know what you are doing, no one questions it." His gaze was on Dean's hips as he spoke. Yes. Very hot indeed. 

It really wasn’t too far off from what Dean did onstage, especially the confidence aspect. “I’ve got it.” He circled his hips again, slowly as he bent his arms, bringing himself closer to Cas.

"Alright, ready to step it up?" Cas breathed out a look in his eyes as he tried not to smile. "This one is called the Baby Maker. Move back." He smirked again, moving to lay on the floor. He positioned himself, shoulders on the floor, feet planted and his hips lifted in the air. He rolled his knees out and then together, pushing his hips out, eyes on Dean.

“Baby maker, huh?” Dean chuckled a little, standing aside to watch Cas. “Wow...I see why it’s called that.” He bit his lip.

“Okay. I’ll try it.” He lay back, putting his feet in the same position as Cas, and rolled his knees while pushing his hips out. It took a couple tries, but each one felt a little less awkward.

Cas sat up beside him, gently nudging Dean's hips to extend up a little more, "Mm, that's it. I can tell you, women will melt if you do that." 

“This is fun.” Dean tried it again, happy to let Cas guide him through it. “So who taught you all these moves?” He asked, sitting back up.

"My uh...sister actually." He said softly. "We aren’t really related, she just owns the club I used to work at. It’s a long story."

“Oh.” Dean nodded. He wasn’t going to pry. “Well, you’re very talented. Maybe you should’ve been one of my backup dancers instead of my security guard.” He chuckled.

"God no." He scoffed. "I am not a dancer. Not that graceful." He smiled a little, ruffling out his long hair a touch.

“Mm. I think you could be if you tried.” Dean smiled and walked back over to the bed, taking a seat.

Cas tsks, focusing on his original goal. "Well, for being such a good student, do you want a lap dance?"

“Hell yes, I do.” Was that even a question?

Cas took a moment to shake himself off, trying to get into the head space. He rolled his shoulders back and pulled out his phone. He scrolled through a few song choices and settled on  _ Cherry Pie _ by Warrant. That song was hot, full of base and right up Cas' alley.

"Sit." He pulled out the chair next to the desk and pointed, Dean quickly obeying.

Cas moved to stand a few feet back from Dean. He pressed play and dropped the phone onto the bed. His bright eyes met Dean's, and he started off simple, the Wine followed by a body roll, his fingers hooking under the edge of his shirt and slipping it off. He dropped to his knees, hands running from his neck, to his chest and down his muscular thighs. He kept his eyes locked with Dean's the entire time, crawling on his knees for a few beats until he was in front of Dean. 

Dean started to squirm a little in the chair, watching in total awe. He was hot, insanely hot, and Dean could hardly believe his eyes. As he crept closer, Dean felt his knees grow weak and he was glad he was sitting down, but his boxers didn’t do much to cover up his excitement.

Cas pushed the rock star's knees apart, sliding his hands up his thighs slowly and leaning forward enough to ever so gently graze his nose along Dean's crotch.

“Cas,” he practically moaned, unable to take his eyes off the man dancing in front of him.

Cas slid up and stood between Dean's legs. He slid his fingertips down Dean's arms and took his hands, lifting them up to Cas' shoulders. He glided his fingers down slowly, making sure Dean could feel every muscle, every curve in his skin. He gently let go of Dean's hands once they reached his pant line.

He then straddled Dean's waist, his ass barely grazing against the rock star’s thighs as he drew his hips in faster circles. He laced his fingers behind Dean's head, leaning close as he kept up the slow rhythm to the beat of the music.

This was one of the most erotic situations Dean had ever been in, and going by his daily life, that was saying a lot. He leaned back against the chair a little, unable to help but rock his hips against Cas’ in time with the beat.

Cas was such a tease, and he knew exactly what he was doing, knew that he was leaving Dean breathless and desperate with every motion.

“Fuck,” Dean groaned, looking up at him.

Cas slid off Dean's lap and settled between his legs, this had become less of a lap dance and more of something he used to give to his very well paying clients in private. He slid Dean's hips forward on the chair, pushing up Dean's shirt just a touch as he ran his tongue from boxer line to navel.

Deans’ entire body broke out into goosebumps when he felt Cas’ tongue on his heated skin. He’d been reduced to a panting, squirming mess, completely at the mercy of the man in front of him.

Cas hid his smile, moving to grip the back of the chair and lifting one of Dean's thighs to hook around his waist as he grazed his hips in small, rhythmic movements against Dean's boxers. 

“Fucking hell, Cas!” Dean groaned. He’d never received a lap dance like this before. “I must be one special customer, hm?” He teased, rocking his hips back against Cas’ and letting out a small moan. 

Cas slid Dean's thigh down, running his fingers up over Dean's skin. He didn't speak; it would break his rhythm and ruin the illusion.

He slid his shoes off and removed his jeans, taking his time as it left him in tight briefs that left little to the imagination. He slid himself to sit reverse on Dean's lap, hands on Dean's knees as he rolled his hips, his ass skimming over Dean's erection.

Dean watched wide-eyed as he started to squirm again. This was almost too much for him, his eyes greedily wandering all over Cas’ body.

He leaned back, placing his hands on Cas’ hips and letting out a soft grunt in pleasure when his ass rocked against him.

Cas let him touch; he didn't mind. He slid his hands from Dean's knees and onto the chair, pushing his hips back and keeping up that rhythmatic hip roll. 

The song died out and Cas slid to stand up. "Should I stop? Or do you wanna pay for another?" He purred out, a playful smirk on his lips.

Dean was still a mess, his heart racing as he slumped against the chair. “Fuck. What do I pay with? Of course I want more.”

"Shirt off," He instructed Dean. He knew how to leave his target audience hard and wanting more, most people just throwing black cards at him.

“Yessir.” Dean tugged off his tank top and tossed it onto the bed, sitting back expectantly, gnawing on his bottom lip.

Cas moved to another song, this one much more sexual:  _ Flesh _ by Simon Curtis.

Cas walked back over, hands on Dean's shoulders as he slid his fingers over Dean's hard chest, Cas' hips circling his thighs, real slow and sensual like the music.

“Mmf...” he looked up, making eye contact with Cas. He wasn’t sure how long it would be until he exploded, but he’d try to be patient.

He slipped off Dean's lap, sliding under his thighs and shoving them up to settle around Cas’ waist as he gripped the back of the chair, grinding and gyrating against Dean's ass. His free hand grasped Dean's thigh, leaning down to flick his tongue over his ear.

"Hold me down and make me scream. Lay me on the floor, Turn me on and take me out, Make me beg for more." He whispered the lyrics against Dean's skin.

“Cas...” Dean’s chest heaved. His hips rocked desperately back against him, his eyes closing as the lyrics were breathed into his ear. It was like an electric current was running through him, and he only hoped he could somehow find a way to unravel Cas the way he was being unraveled.

Cas slid down to kneel in front of Dean. He pushed Dean's thighs apart, hooking one of his legs over his knee, then wrapping the rock star’s thigh around his waist. He pushed up, his cock grinding against Dean's in a rolling rhythm.

“Cas!” Dean let out a sharp cry, gritting his teeth as he grabbed onto Cas’ broad shoulders, rocking his hips senselessly against Cas’. “Fuck, fuck! You’re gonna make me come if you keep this up...”

Cas grinned. Less than two songs and he had Dean in an absolute mess. He slid back, once again back on his knees in front of Dean, taking his legs and hooking them over Cas shoulders. He pushed his fingers into Dean's skin, tracing his muscular thighs. He then leaned forward, grazing his teeth over Dean's clothed cock, tracing his tongue from navel to over Dean's chest. Teasingly, stood, their lips almost meeting but not quite.

Dean huffed, his hips trembling as he gripped Cas’ near shoulder-length hair, tugging a little, but mainly trying to keep himself from toppling off the chair.

He went back to his original position: hands on the chair, grinding his cock into Dean's, knowing the rock star probably couldn't withstand any more relentless teasing.

“Mmf!” Dean leaned his head back, sliding his hands over Cas’ ass and pushing his body closer to him, grinding his hips eagerly. “Fuck, hnnnng. I don’t wanna make a mess in my boxers.”

"You don't want to cum for me?" Cas pouted just a touch, keeping up his slow pattern, rolling his chest in small movements on top of Dean. He lifted his hips up just a touch, twerking his ass down on Dean's cock, Cas' own cock grinding against Dean's stomach.

“I do. But can I take these off?” He bit down hard on his lip, reaching to grab onto his shoulders to hold himself steady as he continued to grind against Cas.

He had never wanted it before, but he wanted to watch Dean cream his boxers. But if he didn't want to, that which was fine. "As you wish." He pulled back enough to slip Dean's boxers off. 

“I don’t do my own laundry, so...” But Dean didn’t want to kill the mood, so that was all he said. He bit his lip as he watched Cas slide off his boxers.

Cas moved back how he was, rocking his hips on top of Dean's lap before breathing against his ear. "I’m here to serve you."

Deans’ hands wound in Cas’ hair again, shuddering at his words. That was all he needed to tip him over the edge, and he came all over Cas.

Cas smirked, pretty pleased with himself. He brushed his fingers over Dean's sensitive tip, lifting his hand to his lips to lick the cum off. There was something he loved about the salted taste.

Dean’s shoulders slumped against the chair, and he raised his hips as Cas cleaned him up a little, his cock twitching at the touch. “Mmf...that was insane, Cas,” he breathed.

"You enjoyed it?" That seemed to be an understatement. 

“Yeah, I enjoyed it, dumbass. I still can’t believe you’re a stripper, but you sure proved it.”

Cas stood up, moving over to flick off his music and throwing a smirk at Dean. " _ Was _ a stripper. And I was very good at my job," he bragged, brushing Dean's cum up over his chest. He would need to shower before he got dressed.

Dean’s eyes wandered over Cas’ chest and he licked his lips. “Now that’s a much nicer sight than if it all ended up in my boxers, hm?” He traced his index finger up along Cas’ chest.

His eyes followed Dean's finger as he brushed through the slick on his chest and pushed it between his full lips, Cas swirling his tongue around the digit, sure to make a little show of sucking on his finger before slipping it from his mouth.

Everything Cas did somehow turned Dean on. It was extremely frustrating. “How the hell do you manage to be so sexy without even trying?” He blurted out, his heart still racing.

"Practice. Lots of it." He answered. "Do you mind if i use your shower?" He asked, pointing to the bath en suite just past the bedroom.

“Go ahead.” Dean needed a bit to catch his breath. Normally, he was the sexy one, the one who took people’s breath away and drove them crazy. He wasn’t used to being on the other side of it.

Cas smirked a little. "Thanks." He stretched his arms out, letting out a pleased moan as he stepped inside the bathroom and partially closed the door. He slipped his briefs off and turned on the shower, taking the time to lather himself up.

Dean shook his head as he watched Cas go. He knew he was just going to continuously be tortured. He got out of the chair and pushed it back toward the desk, putting his boxers and tank top back on and waiting for him.

Cas took his time. The shower pressure was so nice and much better than his room. He climbed out, half-drying himself down and tugging his briefs on. He was towel drying his hair, beads of water still rolling down his chest and thighs. "Thank you,” he said as he headed back over to Dean.

“Yeah...no problem.” Cas might avert his eyes whenever Dean was changing, but Dean couldn’t look away. His mouth suddenly felt dry and he reached to grab a bottle of water from the fridge.

Cas picked up his clothes and slowly redressed, hooking his belt back through the loops and buckling it up. "Did you still want to go out? Do some sight seeing?" He asked Dean, curling his fingers through his wet hair.

“Uh huh.” Dean had to force himself to look away this time. “You uh...didn’t need any taking care of? Or did you...handle that in the shower?” He had no idea why he was so flustered suddenly.

Cas had never seen Dean flustered like this before and he was curious. It was arousing. "Dean?" He quirked a brow, moving closer as he tilted his chin up to meet his gaze. "Why are you so flustered?"

“Shut up. I’m not flustered.” Dean crossed his arms over his chest, refusing to give in. He hated being in this position.

"Naw, are you used to being in charge?" He asked with a slight head tilt. He sat down beside Dean, lifting him up and placing him to sit on his lap. Take charge. I won't fight you on it," Cas breathed out, eyes intense.

“God, you’re so irritating.” Dean sighed. He wanted to be stubborn and say that they should just leave, but he knew Cas wouldn’t care either way, or at least claim not to. He wrapped his arms around Cas’ neck, slowly rocking his hips forward.

Cas brushed his fingers over Dean's hips and settled on his thighs, his tongue pushing out over his lips as he let out a slow hum. "I didn't think you would want round two?" He murmured.

“Why wouldn’t I? Especially when you walk out of the shower half naked and dripping...” Dean shook his head

"Hm? Oh-" 

Dean leaned down and captured Cas’ bottom lip between his teeth, the young security guard letting out a soft whimper. Cas was always in charge, but he would try to let it go.

Dean lightly tugged, continuing to roll his hips against Cas’ as he captured his lips in a deep kiss, letting out a soft moan into his mouth. “Mm.”

Dean pulled back after a moment and asked point blank, “can I suck your cock?” He ached to taste him. 

Cas' lips were slightly swollen, his eyes half-lidded as he peered through his lashes at Dean. Cas had maybe had his dick sucked half a dozen times in his lifespan, mostly by drunken fucks who used too much teeth or had terrible gag reflexes. So, he was a little nervous; he had never enjoyed one before.

"Yeah, uh, sure." He swallowed thickly, clearing his throat.

Dean climbed off his lap, kneeling onto the floor in front of the bed. He places Cas’ knees over his shoulders and palms over his cock through his briefs before he tugged them down. 

“You sure?” He asked, looking up at Cas to gauge his reaction before he started.

Cas felt a little embarrassed at being on display, worried about being judged even though Dean had seen his dick multiple times now. He tried to relax, brushing his fingers through Dean's hair as he watched him. “Yes, please…”

Dean started at Cas’ thick thighs, licking over the bruise he’d made the other night that was already starting to fade a little. He was sure to fix that, sucking a new one in the same spot.

Cas pushed his hips down, letting out a soft moan as his skin was sucked and puckered, Dean marking him once again.

Dean glanced back up at him, amazed again at another sudden shift in Cas. He kissed his way over from his inner thigh to the base of his cock, his thumb brushing over the tip as he glided his tongue slowly down a prominent vein.

“Mm,” he hummed. “You’ve got such a gorgeous dick, Cas. You know that?”

_ Fuck that was hot _ . Cas moaned softly, his cock twitching in excitement just from Dean's heated breath. 'What? Shut up-" he felt his cheeks heating and he grumbled, refusing to meet Dean's gaze.

“What, I can’t compliment you?” Dean chuckled. It was nice being on the other side of things, getting to rile up and fluster Cas after everything he’d just endured. He reached the head of Cas’ cock, swirling his tongue around before sucking it slowly into his mouth. He bobbed his head, gradually taking more of him back.

"You are an ass-" he sucked in a breath, clenching Dean's head between his thighs as he arched his hips up just a touch. "Fuck-" he muttered, his eyelids fluttering shut. Of course Dean was good at this too.

He loved hearing Cas moan like that. His nails dug lightly into the flesh of his thighs as he took him to the back of his throat, bobbing his head faster. “Mm,” he hummed around his cock, his hands trailing down to lightly cup his balls.

Cas couldn't stop the swear words falling from his mouth as he pushed up into Dean's inviting mouth. He was so incredible and there were no words to explain the absolute pleasure that Dean was administrating. He whimpered Dean's name, thighs quivering.

Dean took him back as far as he could, then pulled halfway off before bobbing his head again. He hummed a little, letting Cas feel the vibrations of his lips. Every sound he made was beautiful and it only urged Dean on.

Cas squeezed Dean's head more aggressively, back arching as his toes curled. He wasn't going to last much longer.

"Dean, Dean, uh- ugh~" he was rather vocal, moaning loudly as he came hard.

Dean swallowed him down without hesitation, grunting softly at the taste. He pulled back and licked his lips, climbing back onto Cas’ lap. He leaned forward, whispering into his ear, “I really like the way you sound when you come.”

Cas flushed once again. “Shut up." He panted, rather embarrassed as he grabbed Dean's ass and flipped them over, pressing his lips intensely against Dean's. The taste of his cum still lingered on the rock star's lips, Cas carefully sucking on his tongue.

“That’s one way to make me...” Dean let out a soft moan, wrapping his legs around Cas’ waist.

Cas pulled back slowly, his eyes fluttering just a touch as he looked down at Dean. How was this the best sex he had ever had? The most intimacy he had ever felt with someone. He should go. He knew that he should. But he gave into his desires and just stayed where he was, staring down at Dean, their shared gaze intense.

Dean couldn’t help but smile a little, reaching out to gently comb his fingers through Cas’ hair. “Well, should we uh...get dressed and go do some touristy shit?”

"Do you want to go do touristy things?" He asked, leaning down to press slow, warm kisses against his neck. He hadn't ever felt like this before, and he would probably freak out about it later, but he was so enamored by Dean in that moment, he didn't resist it.

“Mm.” Dean tilted his head back, reaching for Cas’ hand and intertwining their fingers. “Maybe not right now.” It’d take a lot to convince him to leave his bed right about then. He sighed, his heart fluttering a little in his chest as he felt Cas’ warm lips on his flushed neck. He didn’t know what that feeling was, but it made his fingers and toes feel tingly.

Cas squeezed Dean's hand, pulling back to brush their noses together affectionately. He pressed kisses onto his wrist, down his forearm and over the crook of his elbow. He settled down, laying on top of Dean and resting comfortably. He didn't say anything; he didn't have to. This was....great.

Dean completely melted into Cas’ touch. He’d never experienced this level of affection before, from anyone. He wrapped his arms around Cas, trailing his fingers gently along his spine and holding him close. He could stay like this forever.

He closed his eyes, letting out a slow breath. It felt so good, Dean's fingers on his skin, mindlessly tracing patterns along his spine. He felt himself starting to fall asleep, and he wasn't going to fight it.

_ Maybe this time Cas won’t leave _ , Dean thought to himself in passing as he suppressed a yawn. He rested one of his legs across the back of Cas’ knees, continuing to gently trace along his back as his own eyes closed. He felt safe like this, safer than any other security guard he’d had had made him feel.


	8. Crepes and Cuffs

Dean gently shook him awake a little while later, groggy himself. “Mm...Cas. Maybe we should get up before someone comes looking for us. Not that I’m tempted to...but we’ve gotta be careful.”

Cas was sleepy, eyes squinted as he blinked up at Dean. The words finally converged in his mind well enough for him to think. "Oh, shit. Right. Sorry," he muttered, yawning and climbing off Dean. He picked up his clothes from their rumpled pile on the floor and promptly got dressed, clearing his throat as he glanced at himself in the mirror and combed his fingers through his sex-matted hair. 

“Mm. Don’t worry about it. It was...really nice, actually. And we’re in a locked hotel room. I’m safe.” He gave Cas a quick peck on the cheek before he got up, noting how cute he looked with his bedhead. He hadn’t yet had the luxury of watching Cas wake up first thing, so he’d enjoy this.

"I know, but I really should be paying more attention; that's dangerous for you,” he countered, looking over at Dean.

“And what happens when I go to sleep, or you leave the room? It’s okay. No one’s around,” Dean reassured.

"I know, I just-" he didn't know what to say. What was he supposed to say?  _ Oh, I don't want my fuck buddy to get murdered? _ Real professional. So he just nodded his head and smoothed out his uniform.

“I get it. No worries.” Dean reluctantly slid out of bed, walking over to his suitcase. He changed into a different pair of boxers and threw on some jeans and a t-shirt.

Cas wasn't sure what kind of things the rock star would like to do, so he was preparing himself for everything and anything as he waited for Dean. He glanced at the clock; it was ticking at just past 2:30 and Cas' stomach growled a little. He realized he hadn't eaten since early morning, so no wonder.

Dean glanced in the mirror, smoothing down his hair. He slid on his leather jacket and laced up his boots. “Alright. You wanna head to like, a cafe or something? I’d kill for some crepes.”

"Crepes? Yeah, sure. Do you have a place in mind?" He asked, peeling himself off the wall and heading for the door. He tugged it open, holding it for Dean as he gestured for him to go.

“No, but it’s Paris. I’m sure we could just walk down the street and find one.” Dean smiled a little, putting on his sunglasses and cap as he headed out the door and toward the elevators.

"I'm going to want my hat back eventually. Thief." He chuckled softly, an amused smile on his lips as he observed Dean in his all black hat. It hid Cas' messily styled hair and bad highlights that looked straight out of the 90s.

“Alright, well, you can have it back when I stop getting recognized in public,” Dean teased. “Or I can go and buy myself a beret. Do you think I could pull it off?”

"Oh, I would pay to see you in a beret." He chuckled again, pressing the button for the elevator and smiling at the idea of Dean trying to pull off some ugly tourist beret.

“I’ll buy one then. What color?” Dean smirked a little, heading inside the elevator and leaning against the wall. He pushed the button for the lobby.

Cas followed him in, tipping his head a bit in thought. "Green. If you were going to get a stupid beret, at least make sure it suits you."

“What, so I can look like the military?” 

"Maybe a little.” Cas chuckled, eyes slightly creased in amusement, the green was to match Dean's eyes.  _ God _ , what was happening to him?

Once they reached the lobby, Cas stepped out and made a quick sweep with his eyes. "The coast is clear," he said, clearing his throat and subconsciously letting his gaze wander across Dean’s face. 

Dean nodded, walking out the main entrance to the hotel and keeping his head down, his hands slipped into his pockets. There was a street lined with small shops and patisseries on the next block and he headed toward it. “Do you know any French?”

"No. Do you?" He asked, following closely behind Dean, a slight frown on his face.

Dean laughed. “Please. I can hardly speak English.” He looked around at all the shops, trying to find the best cafe. “I think we’ll be fine. Just was curious.”

"Mm, although I did hear that French people are rather rude to tourists,” Cas remarked, continuing his sweep of the empty street.

“Eh, well we’ll stick to the touristy spots where they’re used to people, I guess.” 

Cas’ eyes delved to a rather quaint cafe, just on the street corner. It had a bright blue awning and the front was lined with various flowers. "There? What do you think?

“Sure. Looks cute!” He walked to the front door, letting Cas do his security sweep before he walked in, a small bell jingling above the door frame to signal their entry. 

Cas ran through his usual routine, scoping out the area. Apart from the few small families and elderly couples, the cafe was rather empty.

"The safest place to sit is in that corner over there, but we can sit wherever you like," he murmured softly to Dean, trying not to stand too close.

Dean nodded, heading over to the corner table and taking a seat by the window. He didn’t think anyone would recognize him in here, so he took off the hat and glasses, setting them on the windowsill beside the table.

“Here.” He handed Cas his credit card. “Can you get me something with chocolate, please?”

Cas nodded and took the card. It was a little strange, Dean just handing this to him. It was a platinum card, the type he never thought he’d get to hold in his life, but he tried not to read into it. Dean trusted him because it was his job to be trusted. 

He glanced up at the menu and tried to decipher it as he went to the register. His French was awful and he relied heavily on his phone as he told the guy at the counter that he wanted two crepes: one chocolate and one strawberry. 

He then sheepishly sat back across from Dean, the owner rolling his eyes. "Shouldn't be too long.”

“Ooh la la.” Dean smirked. “Thank you.” He glanced out the window. It really was a beautiful view. He was sad he only got three days here, though it was longer than most tour stops. He’d have to come back someday, take the time to really enjoy the city.

"Have you been to Paris before?" Cas asked, sitting up a little as he peers around outside. It was...alright, not what he pictured Paris to be like, although granted, he was going off movies he had seen.

Dean nodded. “Yeah. I’ve toured all over, but never gotten to stay more than a few days at a time, so I haven’t gotten to see it super well. Just more the uh...underground scene, if you know what I mean.” He chuckled.

"Parties and bars?" Cas nodded, gently taking one of the napkins from the holder and folding it. He was a fidgeter. So it was better that he folded this napkin again and again rather than bite or pick at his fingernails.

“Yup. It’s pretty fun. Though I’m sure we both know the nightclub scene pretty well, huh? Not necessarily in Paris, but in general.” He sat back, gently drumming his fingers on the table. He couldn’t shake the feeling that this was sort of like a date, but he knew Cas was just doing his job.

"In general? Hm, I know the business side. Backstage area stuff. I mean, I mostly saw the inside of one club in LA,” He said, nodding a little. This was... odd, talking one-on-one with Dean, clothes on, outside.

“So you got your start in LA too, huh? Guess a lot of people do.” Dean smiled, looking up when their crepes were brought over. “Merci,” he said to the waiter, though that was about as far as his French extended.

Cas thanked the waiter, taking his crepe and nodding a little. "I grew up there. Well, not there exactly. Downtown LA. Mostly." He says, poking at one of the strawberries.

“I was born in Kansas, but moved there when I was a kid.” Dean never really liked to talk about his childhood, but Cas had divulged a lot to him, so he figured it was only fair. “My mom died...and my dad needed a change of scenery. So we moved. And well, you know my dad, right? John Winchester? More famous than I am.”

Cas stared at him for a moment before tentatively shaking his head. "No." He felt more embarrassed saying no this time around.

As if he didn’t already like Cas enough. Dean smiled. “Well, that’s humbling. Hope you can keep it that way. Trust me, you’re better off.” He sighed a little.

"Why do you say that?" He asked, poking at the crepe as his eyes remained on Dean.

“Because he’s a dick,” Dean replied plainly. “You know the type. Washed-up celebrity. Fame went to his head, so he became an alcoholic. Ruined his career.”

"Dean, I'm sorry. That does not sound like something that must be easy for you to deal with." he replied, brows slightly furrowed.

Dean shrugged, taking a few bites of his crepe. “I turned out fine anyway, didn’t I? Screw him. I really don’t give a shit.”

Cas didn't believe that he didn't give a shit. But he wasn't going to keep digging through Dean’s emotional crap, especially if he wasn't entirely ready to deal with it himself.

"Eh, you turned out okay." Cas smiled a little, hoping to lift Dean’s spirits.

“Thanks.” Dean snorted, continuing to eat. “But we don’t need to talk about my fucked up childhood. That’s a story for...well, probably never.”

Cas gently nudged his foot against Dean’s as a soft comfort, like he was saying “it’s alright.” He then went back to poking at his crepe. "So what got you into music?" He asked, diverting the topic.

“Well, my dad taught me guitar and piano when I was younger. My brother and I toured around with him until I turned eighteen and made a career of my own. I didn’t want to rely on him anymore and I needed money, so I started playing in coffee shops, then nightclubs. That turned into small venues, until I was noticed by a producer and offered a record deal. Found out my dad paid the guy to do it so I declined, kept performing until I made it on my own. And now here I am.”

"I'm glad you managed to make it on your own. And sorry, I should have clarified, has being in music something you have always been interested in? Or was it simply out of necessity that you continued in this line of work?" 

Dean shrugged. “Music’s all I’ve ever known. Grew up listening to the greats. Led Zeppelin, The Rolling Stones, Aerosmith, you know. I was kinda born into the life. Maybe I’d still be interested even if I wasn’t, but I don’t feel like I had a choice to be anything else. I mean, music’s what I’m good at. I write all my own songs. I love being onstage. I like meeting fans. It’s just...what I’m meant to do with my life.”

Cas nodded his head, his smile soft. "It's good. That you found something you feel fits you. It can be hard to find a job you love,” he murmured, finishing off his crepe.

“Mhm.” Dean pushed his plate aside when he was finished. “Since you taught me some dance moves today, maybe I could teach you a little guitar? If you’re interested, that is.”

"Sure, I do not know how good I will be, though." 

“Well, that’s why I’ll teach you. But it does kinda take years of practice, so I don’t expect you to be any good.” 

"Psh, thanks for the vote of confidence." He snorted, drawing himself to his feet.

“I was just trying to tell you I don’t have expectations. It’s for fun. Sorry. You taught me something you’re good at, so I thought I’d returned the favor.” Dean shrugged.

"Dean. I was being sarcastic. I apologize. My humor is... odd." He clarified softly, pushing in his chair.

““I’m learning that.” Dean rolled his eyes, “You ready to go?” He asked, picking up his hat and sunglasses and slipping them back on.

"Lead the way," he told Dean, gesturing toward the door.

“Alright, hear me out,” Dean started as they left the cafe. “I know you said no to this earlier, but there’s an entire  _ district _ of sex shops. Can we at least walk by? Window shop? I mean, that’s like Candyland to me.”

"Dean. I am here to accompany you. If you wish to go see a sex store, I cannot stop you." He shot Dean a fraction of a smile to reassure him. If Dean wanted to go, he would not resist.

“Well sure, but I don’t wanna make you uncomfortable or anything. It might be good for you if we went in, though. Just...looked around. Exposed you to some things.”

"I will tell you if it makes you uncomfortable." He stated, hoping it assured Dean that it really was fine.

“Alright, sweet. It’s just a few blocks down. Clearly, my team had my interests in mind when booking the hotel.” Dean chuckled, slipping on his hat and glasses, starting on his way and keeping his head down just in case someone was to recognize him.

"I think that's also why we are so close to so many bars," Cas mused, following close behind Dean and keeping his eye out. Luckily, it was still mid-afternoon so the streets were mostly packed full of older tourists.

“True. Maybe we can hit some up if there’s time tonight.” Dean grinned, reaching the strip. “It’s much cooler at night, when all the signs light up neon, but here we are. A bunch of sexy names I can’t pronounce!” He was the first to glance into the window of the first store and he chuckled to himself. No doubt Cas would be blushing instantly. A glass rotating display of multicolored dildos spun around, some of them lighting up.

Cas' eyes fell to the glass rotating display, his cheeks instantly heating. How were people not embarrassed to be around here? He shifted a little from foot to foot, his eyes widening in a mixture of awe and terror when one of them lit up and vibrated.

Dean couldn’t help but laugh. “You’re like a teenager. They’re just toys. Won’t bite you. Come on.” He led him down the street, each shop boasting brightly colored signs and toys, and extravagant outfits.

Cas shot Dean a dangerous look, nostrils flared as his cheeks stayed ablaze with embarrassment. He shyly looked at the stores, but mostly kept his eyes low. He hadn't ever been introduced to these things. He had never been open about his sexuality until about two years ago and even then, most people presumed he wasn’t interested in sex at all. 

“You’re gonna need more help than I thought.” Dean placed his hands on Cas’ shoulders. “Come on. We’re going inside one.” He pointed him in the direction of a shop called  _ Supermarche Erotique  _ and they headed inside.

"Eh? Oh, sure." He murmured, heading inside; it was full of cases of toys and costumes. He looked like a deer in headlights, not sure what to say or do.

Dean smiled. Cas was absolutely adorable when he was overwhelmed like this. “Okay. Here’s what we’re gonna do. You’re gonna look around the store, pick out one or two toys. I’ll buy them, and tonight you can use them on me. What do you think?”

"What? Dean! We are in public, keep your voice down." He puffed his cheeks and nudged Dean gently. "And I don’t...I wouldn't even know where to start." His eyes darted around the store nervously, like the dildos were going to jump out and attack him.

“No one else is in the store, Cas. Except for the employees. But they have to respect privacy.” Dean gave his shoulders another squeeze. “Well, is there anything you’ve ever been curious about?”

"No, I mean, I've heard of the basics, obviously. Butt plugs and dildos, vibrators, you know?" He said softly. "But I have never used them before."

Dean nodded. “They’re not that hard to use. And that’s why you can use it on me so you get a feel for it before you try anything for yourself. Just think of it like...trying a new food you’ve never had before.”

"On myself? I-I’m not a bottom, though.” Not that he had ever tried, but Dean didn't need to know that.

“You don’t have to be a bottom to enjoy and toys. And top and bottom are arbitrary anyway. But I won’t force you to do anything, obviously. You can just use them on me if you don’t want to on yourself.”

Cas seemed unsure but nodded a little. "Do you...let others use toys on you often?" He asked as he gingerly started looking around, trying not to focus on one particular thing for too long.

“Sometimes. I mostly use ‘em when I’m alone because I don’t tend to carry many around with me.” 

Cas nodded, stopping as he eyed the paddles. He had smacked Deans ass and that had turned him on, which excited Cas, surely this would be a very similar thing?

Dean bit his lip when he saw what Cas was eyeing. “Mm. You can try it out on your palm.”

Cas picked up the studded paddle that had _ slut  _ sprawled on it in curly letters. He slid it across his palm before giving it a firm whack. He smirked a little, doing it again. He liked it.

“Fuck,” Dean murmured under his breath. There was that confident, dominant Castiel he knew. “Nice, huh?”

"Mm, I like this. Can I have it, please?” He asked softly, looking at Dean as he gently bounced the paddle on his palm.

“Mhm. Whatever you want, Cas.” Dean chuckled again. That immediate switch back to shy and near childlike as if he was holding up an action figure instead of an object to spank Dean with surprised him.

He gently passed the paddle to Dean and kept looking, his eyes moving around the aisles. He wasn't sure if he was ready for playing with dildos or butt plugs but his eyes settled on a handcuff and blindfold set. Ridiculously fluffy but he found an interest in it, gently slipping his fingers over the silky blindfold.

Dean took it, tapping it against his palm a few times and imagining what it’d feel like on his ass. The idea of getting spanked, then having to cram himself into a pair of leather pants the next day wasn’t the most appealing thing, but he was still willing to do it.

He continued to follow Cas around the store, finding him eyeing the handcuffs and blindfold. “Ooh. You like those?”

"Yes, I....think it would be interesting to try." He gently brushed his fingers over the handcuffs, imagining Dean bent over, handcuffed as he spanked his ass. A total loss of power, that's what excited Cas. "Is that okay? Or should I select something else?”

“No, these are great! Like I said, whatever you want, Cas.” Dean smiled a little. He’d never had a regular fuck buddy like this before; hardly ever had he even had sex with the same person more than once.

"Then these are my selections," He stated with a confident smile. He gently handed over the duo kit to Dean, meeting his eyeline for a brief moment. He was excited and nervous all at once.

“Alrighty. You uh, don’t have to go up to the counter with me if you don’t want to.” Dean didn’t want Cas to feel any more embarrassed. He walked over, setting the items on the counter and keeping his head down on the off chance he might be recognized.

Cas looked around mindlessly, grateful that he wasn’t made to go to the counter. So many toys, so many options. He felt more and more intrigued; maybe embracing sexuality wasn't such a taboo thing here.

Dean paid for the items, folding up the bag discreetly and slipping it into his jacket pocket. “See, that wasn’t so bad, right?” He chuckled, starting out of the store.

Cas rolled his eyes. "Psh, honestly." His red cheeks were finally fading back to their natural color and he tucked his hands into his pockets as they ducked out of the store.

Dean gently nudged him on his way out the door, looking around the street before he headed away from the district. One store was enough, he thought. For Cas, at least. He could spend the rest of the day here.

Cas followed suit, making a beeline for the exit of this district when he caught the eye of a blonde. Her face lit up and she waved, hopping across the road to them.

"Well well, look who is out and about in Paris' sex district; Clarence and Winchester." She mused.

"Hello, Meg." Cas murmured, trying to keep his voice polite, but she’d caught them at the worst time possible.

“Clarence?” Dean asked, confused. That was an interesting nickname for Cas. “Well, you know me. Can’t go to Paris without checking this out and I have to drag Castiel wherever I go, unfortunately.”

Cas shot Dean a look at the last comment.

"Mm, you say drag but you have been hogging him all to yourself, Winchester. Is he your new boytoy yet?" She asked and it was Meg’s turn to receive Cas' look.

Dean crossed his arms. “My new boytoy? The hell is that supposed to mean? He’s my bodyguard.”

"Oh come on Dean. You bang anything with genitals and a heartbeat. There is a reason Jo usually gives you uggos for bodyguards." She raised her brows. "But Clarence over here was a desperate hire. Me and the other security detail have bets on how long before you bang him and he's fired. Sorry dude." She looked at Cas and shrugged.

Dean scoffed, genuinely offended. “If that were true, then why haven’t I tried to bang you yet, Meg? Or Jo? You’re both...not ugly. And even drunk, I’ve never made a move. I know my boundaries. I’m not some...brainless animal or something.” He sighed. “And even if I were to do that, that’s none of anyone’s business. Castiel can’t get fired unless I decide to fire him. And I can fire you too, so watch what you say about me. And seriously, why’re you calling him Clarence? I don’t get it.” He felt his cheeks heating with anger and he tried not to clench his hands into fists.

She snorted. "Castiel? Do you not realize that's a biblical name? The great Cassiel? An angel like this bub." She patted Cas' cheek and he scowled, "But Clarence is much more fitting. From the movie? It’s A Wonderful Life ? Little cutie pie." She dropped her hand and pressed her palm to his chest.

Dean looked dumbfounded. If anything, he’d try to accuse Meg of coming onto Cas. “I don’t know shit about religion. Never followed it. But if you’re calling this guy an angel? You clearly don’t know him.”

"I better get going." She smiled up at Cas. "See ya kids." She sauntered off, giving them a wink.

Dean snorted a little, watching her walk away. Once she was gone, he turned to look at Cas.

“Well, fuck. I guess I’m too predictable, huh?” He scratched the back of his neck. “But seriously, she doesn’t have a right to say that. I mean, I’ve never hooked up with anyone who works for me before.”

"Really, Dean, it's fine. I'm just a bodyguard. She's right. And even if you have, I don't care." He shook his head, not quite convincing himself of that.

“Yeah, you’re fine with it because she likes you,” Dean grumbled. “I’m just her pain-in-the-ass employer she talks about behind my back.” 

"Employees always talk about their bosses. It's nothing new,” he muttered.

“Oh yeah? Do you talk about me?” Dean chuckled, slightly amused.

“No. Anyway, where are we going next Dean?" Cas cut him off, having forgotten for a moment that he was on duty. Dean  _ had _ to drag him along. This wasn’t an outing as friends. Hell, even as acquaintances. It was a celebrity and his bodyguard. He wouldn't say anything negative about Dean, in front of him or not. He just needed a minute to remind himself for the hundredth time that he was just Dean's employer. Nothing more. So he shouldn't care what Dean said or thought, right?

Dean continued walking until they neared the hotel. “I dunno. My mood’s kinda killed now...”

"Back to the hotel it is," Cas stated; he wasn't really in a talking mood himself. Both of them were quiet as they stepped into the lobby and it was already beginning to grow dark outside. Dean removed his sunglasses and placed his hat affectionately atop Cas’ head before making his way to the elevators.

He then pressed the button for his floor and stepped out once it’d arrived. He fished his key out of his pocket and unlocked the door to his room, kicking off his shoes and hanging up his jacket.

“Did I say something wrong?” He asked after a moment, noticing Cas’ shift in demeanor.

Cas followed behind Dean, keeping his distance. He stepped out of the elevator and did the general sweep. As Dean spoke again, Cas answered with another "No." He stood by the door. "Would you like me to order you dinner?" He asked, changing the topic.

“Yeah, fine.” Dean took the bag of what they’d bought out of his pocket, concealing it beneath several layers of clothing in his suitcase. He took a seat on the bed, looking up at Cas. That conversation with Meg had really shaken him, but he didn’t know why he was so irrationally angry.

"What do you want?" Cas asked, making his way to the phone, flicking through the menu for a minute before tossing it onto the bed near Dean.

Dean glanced at it halfheartedly. Everything was fancier here. But at least this menu was in English. “I guess I’ll have the New York strip steak, side of mashed potatoes. And uh, why not some wine?”

Cas pushed the number for reception, calling and placing Dean’s order. “It will be here in twenty minutes,” he informed him, then took his post against the wall, arms and ankles crossed. 

“Thanks,” Dean murmured, unsure of how to alleviate the obvious tension in the room. He’d likely make it worse by saying something, so for once in his life, he remained quiet.

Cas would wait until Dean had eaten and then he would go back to his room and mope in there. There was no reason to, but Meg had ruined whatever they had going. So now Dean was quiet and Cas was annoyed. Hopefully some sleep would help.

This was their problem. They were both too stubborn to communicate how they felt, or be open with each other. So it led to these long stretches of awkward, painful silence. “You not hungry?” Dean finally asked, an innocent question he hoped would at least alleviate some of the silence.

Cas refused to be vulnerable and tell Dean what he was feeling, mostly out of fear of getting laughed at. "I will eat when my shift is over. It is unprofessional to eat on the job," He muttered, his cold eyes falling on Dean.

“I think we’re a little past that stage by now, but fine.” It looked like Cas wouldn’t be staying any longer than he had to that night. And Dean had been looking forward to getting to use their new toys. Oh well.

"You made it clear you are unfortunately stuck with me. I don't want to ruin the rest of your night with my presence." He commented flatly.

“What? Cas—no. That’s not what I meant by that.” Dean sighed. “I meant unfortunately for you...it was a joke.” Not that he thought Cas would believe him, but he was telling the truth. “You honestly think after all this that I don’t like being around you? I could just request a different security guard.”

Cas took a moment to think, his eyes on Dean. "Do you mean that? I don't know, just sometimes it feels like you just, tolerate me. Which is fine I mean-" he shrugged a little.

“Yes, I mean it.” Dean pinched the bridge of his nose. This conversation was creeping dangerously close to talking about feelings and he shifted uncomfortably in his seat. “I don’t just tolerate you. I wouldn’t keep asking you to stay longer than you have to if I did.”

Cas could tell this conversation wasn't going to last much longer so he picked up the closest pillow and threw it at Dean. "Idiot," he muttered, knowing throwing pillows at him would become a habit. But he was grateful for what he said.

“Thanks.” Dean held his hands up to shield himself from the pillow, watching it bounce off his palms and land back on the bed beside him. “Sit?” He asked, patting the mattress.

Cas moved over to Dean and sat beside him, feeling a lot better. "Heads up, I'm eating half your steak,” he joked, nudging him.

“Order your own damn dinner.” Dean shook his head. “Honestly, Cas. So unprofessional.” He clicked his tongue disapprovingly, but couldn’t help the smile that escaped. He liked this much better, the banter.

Cas cracked a smile, glad that the awkwardness had subsided. "I can show you unprofessional." His smile twisted into a smirk.

“Oh yeah?” Dean raised an eyebrow, shifting a little on the bed. He placed his hand on Cas’ thigh and affectionately squeezed.

Cas moved quickly, grabbing Dean and lifting him in a flurry, tossing him onto the bed and climbing on top of him. He met Dean’s lips in an intense, heated kiss.

“Mmf.” Dean was caught by surprise. A rush of arousal went through him and he held onto Cas’ shoulders, returning his kiss.

Cas reluctantly pulled back, staring down at Dean. "Very unprofessional," he murmured, shifting on his palms as he leaned down again. This time the kiss was a little slower, deeper. Cas' tongue explored Dean’s mouth, taking his every taste he could.

“Cas...” Dean grunted against his lips, letting his tongue flick across Deans’ as his hands slid down over his ass. He hated how little it took for Cas to get him worked up.

It was easy to get caught up in Dean. His lips, his scent, the way his big hands ran down Cas' rather slender frame and cupped his ass. He moaned softly, refusing to break the kiss as he grabbed Dean's waist, sitting up on his knees and pulling the rock star up with him.

Dean shifted, wrapping his legs around Cas’ waist and sitting himself up on his lap. He wrapped his arms around his neck, catching his bottom lip and lightly sucking. “Mm.” He couldn’t get enough.

Cas slipped his hands under Dean's shirt, caressing his skin with his fingertips as he pulled back, nipping at Dean’s jawline.

There was a knock at the door and Cas immediately pulled away, stumbling to his feet in a lust filled daze as he tried to straighten himself up and fix his hair.

Dean cleared his throat, muttering under his breath as Cas had to pull away. He stood up, smoothing the sheets back on the bed and giving himself a quick glance in the mirror to make sure he didn’t look suspicious.

Cas moved to the door and pulled it open to reveal the same woman as yesterday delivering the cart of food. She bobbed her head and left, the bodyguard letting out a soft sigh of relief.

“Mm. She’s hot, don’t ya think?” Dean chuckled a little as he brought the cart over to the bed, using it like a table to start on his dinner.

"Oh yes, the middle-aged scowling woman who brings you your food is hot." Cas rolled his eyes.

Dean shrugged. “What can I say? I like brunettes.” He shook his head at Cas, taking the bottle opener provided and popping the cork of the wine bottle.

Cas flopped on Deans bed beside him, his eyes on the ceiling. He was tired, but he felt...happy? Weirdly. He hadn't ever had a prolonged amount of time without a sense of dread.

“Mm, you wanna be a little more unprofessional and have some wine with me?” Dean took a sip straight from the bottle between bites of his steak.

"Classy Dean, give me the bottle." 

“Who do I have to impress here?” He laughed. 

Cas looked over at him and stood up, ruffling out his hair. He grabbed the bottle from Dean’s hand, finding the wine glasses and pouring the rock star one. "Do you plan on leaving this hotel room again tonight?” The answer balanced on whether he would have a glass or not.

Dean accepted the glass instead, shrugging. “That depends on whether we’re having sex tonight or not.”

"Good to know basic manners are the tipping scale of whether sex is on the table or not." 

“No, I meant about if I plan on leaving the room tonight.”

"Then I won’t have wine just in case you go out." He leaned against the wall and shrugged. “So, if you were trying to impress me, what would you do?" He asked, curious.

Dean took another sip. “Hmm, I dunno. Probably not drink from the bottle directly. I don’t know what impresses you, Cas.”

"Come on. You see me in a bar, you wanna fuck me, what would you do?"

“Well...I wouldn’t have to do anything if you didn’t live under a rock and knew who I was. I’d just wink and say ‘hey, I’m Dean.’ And you’d say ‘I know’ and that’s all it would take.”

"Ugh." Cas pulled a face. Dean really never had to work for anything. "Lame." Cas said, putting the bottle of wine on ice.

Dean laughed. “You strike me as the type of person who knows who they’re interested in. And no amount of cheesy pick-up line or flirting could sway you. You’d take a look at me, or any person really, and know within the instant whether you want them or not. If you decide you don’t, nothing I could say would change that. You’d find everything I tried on you annoying. Am I right?”

"With your cocky _ everybody loves me _ rock star persona? Yeah. I would." Because it wasn't genuine. It wasn't Dean. It was fake and painfully so.

“But I must’ve done something right, huh? I mean, I didn’t use my fame because you don’t care, and I’ve been able to get you in my bed.”

"I guess." Cas half shrugged. He wasn't really listening anymore anyway. Dean was on his little tyrant of cocky disposition and Cas wasn't going to slow him down.

“Alright then. You asked.” Dean finished his dinner and placed the cover back onto the plate, pushing the cart away from him and toward the wall.

Cas peeled himself from the wall and pushed the cart outside the room, leaving it for the workers. He made his way back inside but he was unsure whether he was going to stay or not. The night had gotten...weird.

“Are you back to being professional now?” Dean asked when he returned. “Could I get like, a schedule or something? So I’m prepared?” He snorted.

"If you require one, ask Jo,” he replied, too annoyed to pick up on Dean’s sarcasm. “I’m your bodyguard, not your day planner." He thought there was more depth to Dean. More than just...this. but he was starting to think he was wrong.

“Oh, I don’t think I should ask Jo about that.” Dean shook his head. “Never mind.” He was going to get whiplash with how quickly their dynamic kept changing.

He eyed Dean; what was this exactly? Friends? Coworkers? Employee-boss? What the hell was this to Dean? He knew this wasn't the right time to ask, considering for a second there it all felt fine, until dinner came and once again things went downhill quickly. Was it when they had conversations that things soured? Surely not; he loved talking to Dean at the crepe cafe and enjoyed being around him in Paris. It was definitely Meg that threw him. It ruined whatever they had going. Cas was now overthinking and crabby. "Sorry. Just tired." He murmured. 

“It’s fine. If you wanna leave, you can. I don’t really feel like going anywhere else tonight.” Dean lay back, resting one of his hands behind his head. “And I’m not kicking you out either. You’re welcome to stay. But if you wanna leave, you’re relieved of your duties for the day, so to speak.”

"Do you want me to stay?" Cas asked, tilting his head just a touch. That was the question. Was this really all it was going to be? Or could they actually be friends?

“I mean...yeah. But you said you were tired, so I’m not gonna force you.” Dean sighed a little. Of course he wanted Cas to stay, but he didn’t want to look desperate or needy.

"Why don't you just say yes?" Cas sighed, pulling on Dean’s foot as he sat at the end of the bed again. "If you want it. It's that easy." 

“Fine.” Dean rolled his eyes. “Yes, Cas. I want you to stay.”

"You are an idiot." He shook his head, sitting on the end of the bed. "Would you like to watch TV?" He offered as a calming alternative to talking.

“Sure, but I can’t really understand the guide. It’s all in French.” Dean switched the TV on, starting to scroll through the channels.

Cas slid his shoes off and crossed his legs on the bed, his eyes on the television as he pressed his elbow into his knee and chin on his palm. He dazed out, the blur of French unrecognizable to him.

Dean was fine with whatever he’d put on. He switched on the subtitles so he wasn’t completely lost. It was some soap opera type show. But it didn’t really matter what was on TV. It was just an excuse to be close to Cas. So he scooted over, resting his head on Cas’ shoulder.

Cas blinked a few times, turning to look at Dean properly. It took a few moments for him to process but once he settled into the idea, he gently reached up and combed his fingers through Dean’s hair slowly.

Dean smiled softly, letting out a contented hum. This was weird for him, but even weirder, it felt comfortable. Like his head was made to fit right on Cas’ shoulder.

Cas wasn't used to affection like this; it was very rare for him but he didn't hate it. If anything, it was weirdly soothing and Dean seemed like he was comfortable, or else he would have already bitched about Cas' bony shoulder.

“You’re warm,” Dean murmured, the lazy smile stuck on his face. Maybe things were better when they didn’t talk, when they instead simply existed in each other’s company.

Cas gently massaged Deans scalp, weirdly finding this more intimate than when they fucked. There was a domestic bliss about it, a comfort. No arguing or stubborn misunderstandings. This was easy.

“Mm.” Dean continued to hum, one of his hands reaching up to stroke the light stubble across his chin.

Cas’ eyes closed as he leaned into Dean’s touch, sliding his hand down to massage Dean’s back gently, and nuzzling into Dean’s messy hair.

Dean nearly melted, picking his head up slightly and tilting Cas’ chin down to meet his lips in a soft, affectionate kiss.

Cas slid his free hand up through Deans messy hair as he was met with a soft, tender kiss. Which they hadn't shared before. This was different. And it made Cas' heart race just a touch.

Dean sat up a little, not breaking the kiss as his arms snaked around Cas’ waist, pulling him closer. He felt a lump in his throat, but he ignored it.

Cas tugged him close, letting out a pleased sigh as he was pulled up against Dean. His arms wrapped around his neck, blood pumping as he straddled his waist to hold him close.

Dean pulled back slightly to catch his breath, but remained pressed against Cas, his chest heaving a little. He looked up into his eyes, and he swore his heart stopped for a second. What was going on with him? “Cas...” he breathed.

"Yes, Dean?" He asked, his voice soft.

“Mm, I uh...I dunno...” Dean had hardly realized he’d said Cas’ name. A slight heat crept into his face and he willed it away, confused. He’d never acted nor felt like this around someone before.

"Dean." A smile crept over Cas' lips, "are you blushing?" He chuckled lightly, cupping Dean's cheeks and kissing his nose gently.

“What? No. Pffft. Shut up.” Dean laughed a little when Cas kissed his nose. It felt...good. This type of intimacy was all new to him.

Cas found it cute and so very human. He leaned down and met Dean’s lips in very gentle, short kisses. It felt...amazing. He felt giddy and warm and excited.

Dean wrapped his arms around him again, a smile on his face through each gentle kiss. “What’re we doing?” He asked softly just before he met Cas’ lips again. He really didn’t know.

"Does it matter?" Cas asked, not wanting to overthink it as he met Dean in another kiss. He gently rolled them forward to lay Dean flat on his back, lacing their fingers together as he kept up the gentle kiss.

“No,” Dean replied without hesitation, letting Cas guide him. He gently squeezed his hand, his other pushing up the back of his shirt so he could glide his fingers along his spine.

Cas shivered a little under Deans touch, pulling back from his lips to kiss along exposed patches on his skin. He slid his free hand down to caress along Dean's thigh slowly.

Dean tilted his head back, gently tracing down his spine, then back up. He shifted beneath Cas, wrapping one of his legs around his waist. It was such a light, blissful feeling he was experiencing, a sensation he didn’t want to end.

Cas halted at Deans neck, his hand relaxing against his skin. His head was dazed but he knew this was a really dangerous line he was walking. He knew this feeling. This was one he had only felt once before and he knew he was falling for Dean. Despite their petty stubbornness, there was a chemistry that reeled him in.

“Mm...” Dean hummed again, intoxicated by his kisses and gentle touches. “This is really nice, Cas,” he murmured, encouraging him to continue. Was this what it was like? Having a crush? The thought made him feel dizzy.

He felt himself getting attached and he hated it. He wasn't sure if he should keep going or not. He swallowed, pulling back to look at Dean properly, uncertainty in his bright eyes.

“Everything okay?” Dean murmured, sensing his hesitation. This was new territory for him, all the confidence he typically had in the bedroom gone out the window.

"I dont know." He was honest, his voice soft. "Should we keep going?" He asked. He knew Dean felt whatever was going on between them at that moment. It wasn't passionate or angry, no tearing of clothes or rough bites on skin.

“I’d like to. Do you wanna keep going?” Dean reached up, gently smoothing down Cas’ hair. He wasn’t sure what ‘keep going’ meant exactly, but he knew that he didn’t want to stop.

Cas swallowed thickly and nodded a little, his hands falling to Dean's shirt. He pushed it up, eyes on Dean as he explored a little. He slipped down and pressed a slow, open-mouthed kiss on his chest, running his tongue over his nipple.

Dean let out a soft grunt, slipping his arms through the short sleeves and sitting up slightly to pull it off. He lay back down, arching his back a little. That felt really good.

He moved over to Dean's other nipple, caressing it between his full lips as he unbuttoned his shirt and slid it from his shoulders. He tossed it on the floor, moving down further. Over his chest, his rib cage, grazing his teeth over his hip bones.

Dean became a squirming, writhing mess beneath Cas, almost practicing the body roll he was taught before as each part of his torso raised, then lowered as Cas moved down it. His fingers trailed over his bare back, sliding over his muscular shoulder blades.

He undid Dean's pants and slid them off from around his hips, his fingers caressing his now bare skin as he had Dean naked in front of him. 

"Can I fuck you?" He asked, his voice low and quite serious as his eyes lifted to look at Dean.

“Yes,” Dean replied breathlessly, raising his hips a little. “The toys are under my clothes in my suitcase if you wanna use ‘em.” He bit his lip, his body flushed with excitement.

"Next time," he replied, slipping out of the rest of his clothes. This didn't feel like the right time to spank Dean; the mood was too, different for that. Instead, he wanted to hold Dean, fuck him hard and slow.

“Okay.” Dean couldn’t help but squirm a little, his lip sucked in between his teeth. 

Cas reached over to the side table where the condoms and lube were and he fumbled a little, pulling them out. "Do you need to be prepped?" Cas asked, one hand caressing Deans hip as his ice blue eyes fell to him once again.

“Not as much as last time, but a little.” He nodded. He enjoyed the feeling of Cas’ fingers thrusting inside him.

He coated his fingers generously in lube, adjusting Dean's hips and nudging his thighs apart. He watched him, sliding two digits between Dean's cheeks and pressed them into his hole, pushing slowly. "Tell me if it hurts," He murmured, his voice soft and caring. 

Dean let out a soft gasp, pushing down against Cas’ fingers. “Mmf,” he grunted. This felt so different from the last time Cas had done this, much more intimate, though he couldn’t quite figure out why.

He leaned over Dean, pressing kisses down his neck and scissoring his fingers inside, stretching him out slowly. He groaned a little, his cock alert and pushing against Dean's thigh as he marked just below the rock star's collarbone. "Tell me when you are ready," he murmured, pushing in a third finger.

Dean leaned his head back, moans spilling from his lips as he grabbed handfuls of Cas’ hair and tugged. His hips rocked forward and he clenched around his fingers. “Ready,” he groaned.

Cas growled lowly as his hair was tugged, pulling back to watch Dean as his tongue swiped over his bottom lip. He pulled his fingers out, grabbing a hold of the condom and tearing it open, sliding it onto his shaft. He generously coated it in lube, giving a few solid pumps. He would have usually already flipped his partner over so he could fuck them without having to look at them but this time..This time he wanted to watch Dean’s face as he fucked him, watch him come.

He hoisted Deans thighs up, positioning himself and sliding in with a slow moan, his eyes on Deans face.

“Cas...” Dean tossed his head back, grabbing onto him and pulling him close. His eyes squeezed shut for a moment as he got used to the feeling, then slowly opened them, looking into Cas’ eyes. He hadn’t expected this. Every other time, Cas was rough with him, took what he needed and got to the point. But this time, it was like he wanted Dean to enjoy it too, not that he hadn’t before, but there was something nurturing in his eyes he hadn’t seen last time.

He leaned down and pressed a soft kiss to Dean’s lips, his eyes fluttering closed as he thrusted slowly. He moaned against his lips, feeling a well of emotion that he had never felt before. His stomach clenched, body flushed with heat as he kept up the even pace, his thrusts hard.

Dean slid his hands down Cas’ back, digging his nails into his flesh and slipping his tongue into Cas’ mouth. Every nerve in his body felt struck by lightning. He raised his hips a little, grinding his cock against Cas’ abdomen and letting out another whimpery moan into his mouth.

His hands grasped at every part of Dean he could reach; thighs, hips, ass-one hand wound around Dean’s cock, stroking quickly. He pulled back, panting against Dean’s swollen lips as his tongue flickered out to caress along his bottom lip, pushing deeper inside.

“Cas!” Dean cried out, his hips bucking and his cock giving a firm twitch in his hand. “Fuck,” he groaned, his hips rocking faster, more eagerly until he felt he was about to explode. “I’m close...” Just a little more.

"Good." He breathed out, feeling his own orgasm fast approaching. With their breaths mingled just a touch, he pulled back just enough to moan, Dean's pleasured face pushing him over the edge. He came with a loud moan, covering his mouth with his free hand.

Dean clenched around his cock, leaning down and biting into Cas’ shoulder as he came. His body shaking, he clung to him. “Holy shit,” he murmured.

Cas let out a groan as Dean bit into him, his fingers now rubbing his waist slowly as he cuddled him close. "Yeah," Cas agreed, breathless and panting.

Dean laughed softly, burying his face in the crook of Cas’ neck as he tried to catch his breath. “That was amazing, Cas,” he murmured, unwilling to let go of him.

Cas settled down on top of Dean, resting his cheek on his hair and nuzzling a little. 

"It was," he murmured. Different, but fucking amazing. How was that the case? What made Dean so different? He annoyed the hell out of Cas sometimes, but this came so easily.

Dean slid his hands gently over Cas’ hips and up his back, enjoying the feeling of their bodies pressed together, warm and a little sweaty. He felt he could stay like that forever, and though it was Cas’ job to protect him, he thought this was the best way in doing so.

He cuddled Dean close, wanting to stay wrapped up in him all night. His fingers pressed into his waist and nuzzled into his hair; but this was crossing a very dangerous line. "Dean," Cas said softly, hoping for a touch of reassurance that this wasn't such an awful idea.

“Hm?” Dean continued to gently stroke his fingers down his back, his lips reaching the skin on his neck and beneath his chin to kiss lightly. Anywhere he could reach.

_ Fuck _ that felt nice. So soothing. Cas murmured a soft, “nothing” as he enjoyed the pecks, the affection curling inside him and he felt butterflies in his stomach. He closed his eyes, gripping Dean's waist.

“Mm, okay.” Dean continued, tracing from his lower back up to just beneath his neck, his lips pressed against his pulse as he breathed deeply. “You wanna stay the night?”

Cas should go back to his room; staying here would make things complicated, but he was so comfortable and he really was exhausted so he reluctantly peeled himself off Dean to go wash up and strip the condom off. 

After a few moments, he came back and climbed under the sheets. "Yes,” He murmured softly.

Dean waited the agonizing few minutes as Cas left for an answer. He didn’t expect him to say yes, didn’t think that anything had changed between them, that whatever he’d just experienced with Cas only existed in his mind. But Cas  _ did _ say yes. So maybe it wasn’t just in his head.

“Yay!” Dean smiled, holding his arms out.

Cas grinned and rolled his eyes, bundling him up and curling him into an affectionate hug under the blankets. He leaned over and flicked the light off, his face burying into Dean's warm neck.

“Mm. G’night, Cas.” Dean closed his eyes, gently stroking his hair until he fell asleep, cuddled up against Cas.

Cas stayed up for a few hours, silent as he rubbed Dean's waist, cuddling him close. It was well past 2am when Cas finally fell asleep. This time, he didn't sneak out; he didn't feel an urgency to. He wanted to stay curled up with Dean well into the morning.


	9. Dean's "Girlfriend"

Dean woke up later the next morning, surprised and happy to find Cas was still there. So maybe...this did mean it wasn’t all in his head.

“Hmm...you stayed,” he murmured, his voice thick with sleep as he rolled over.

Cas grunted as he was pulled from his sleep, rolling over and gently pressing a pillow onto Dean's face. "Shh, sleep," he grumbled

“Mm, stop it. I’m up.” Dean swatted the pillow away, yawning. “Gotta perform tonight.” He curled back up to Cas, unable to recall the last time he’d felt this genuinely happy.

Cas grunted again, rolling over and squinting at the time. "Oh, shit." He realized he’d really fucked up. He shouldn't have stayed, shouldn't have fallen asleep next to Dean like that. He climbed out of bed quickly and pulled his clothes on, trying to smooth out of his hair while half asleep.

“Hey, why’re you in such a rush now?” But Dean thought he knew the answer. Reality had set in and Cas was ready to flee, go back to being ‘professional.’

"I need to shower and get dressed. Dean. I'm supposed to be your bodyguard starting, an hour ago." He huffed. "If anyone caught me staying here overnight, I would lose my job in an instant." He sighed softly. He didn't regret staying with Dean; he just hated the fact he had no self discipline or control around him.

“Uh huh. Well, you’re fine. Everyone knows I sleep in. And you’re where you’re supposed to be, with me. You’re doing nothing wrong.” Dean chuckled. “But go shower. I’d ask to join you but it looks like you’re back in business mode, so I won’t bother.”

Cas took a breath, letting out a relieved sigh.. Dean was right. He was here; he was safe. Cas was technically where he was supposed to be, even if the context was unconventional.

His eyes lifted to meet Dean’s. "Well I'm here to serve you, so if you require someone to wash your back..." he trailed off with a shrug. 

“I like the way you think.” Dean smirked, slipping out of bed. He headed into the bathroom. Luckily, the showers were big enough for two people so they wouldn’t be cramped.

Cas stripped back out of his clothes and climbed into the large shower, turning on the warm water full blast, letting out a happy sigh as it hit his cold body.

Dean was quick to join him, sliding the glass door shut behind him. He stood partially beneath the shower head, wrapping his arms around Cas’ middle.

Cas leaned back against Dean's chest, his fingers sliding up to brush through the rock star’s damp hair slowly. "You excited for your show tonight?" 

“Mm.” Dean smiled contentedly. “Yep! Last one in Paris, then we fly out tomorrow. It’s been a little exhausting, so these days off are nice.”

"I can imagine," Cas murmured. Next they were headed to Rome which was exciting. Yet another place Cas had never visited.

Dean nodded. “I wish we could stay in one city for more than a day or two. I think the three days here is the longest on the trip. But maybe I’ll come back some day on my own time, when I’m not touring.”

"Sounds like a good plan." Cas tipped his head towards Dean and turned in his arms to look at him properly. "Before you find out from someone else, like Meg or Jo, I just thought I would tell you my contract is for as long as you are on tour." He brushed his fingers over the nape of Dean’s neck.

“Oh. Okay.” Dean crept a little closer to him, trying not to react strongly to that sudden statement. “But you can renew the contract if you want to, right? I mean, I always need security. But I guess you might get bored looking after the same person for days on end.” He sighed a little. There was one month left of his tour.

Cas smiled , massaging gently at the base of Dean’s neck. He knew that wasn't going to happen. He already had a job booked for after he came back to LA.

“Maybe that’ll be a good thing then. We can still be friends? And you can’t get fired because you won’t be working for me anymore.” Dean shrugged. He wasn’t sure how sustainable this relationship was. So like the tour, he’d enjoy it while it lasted.

Cas also knew that wasn't going to happen. Dean liked the convenience of him and he was fine with that. Well, he wasn't. But he would need to be. "Hey, I'm getting a little cold so I’m going to hop out. Would you like breakfast?” 

“Uh, sure. You don’t wanna like, shampoo your hair or anything?” Maybe Dean shouldn’t have asked that. Maybe Cas wasn’t interested in keeping in touch once his contract was up.

“I should probably wash myself or else you might bitch that I smell later.” He smiled a little but honestly, that tension had dragged them back to an uncomfortable depth.

Dean rolled his eyes, taking the bottle of body wash and handing it to him. “Here. I’ll stop distracting you. Sorry.”

"Mm, keep those hands to yourself." He squeezed some of the body wash into his hands, then lathered up and began rubbing himself down.

Dean did as he was told, but his eyes still wandered. He didn’t know why, but Cas lathering himself up, running soapy hands all over his body, was extremely hot. He turned away, squeezing a little shampoo in his hair and massaging it into his scalp before he rinsed it off.

Cas let out a happy hum, rubbing down his shoulders, chest and arms. Hips and thighs. He stepped a little closer. "Would you like me to wash your back?" He murmured.

“Please.” Dean leaned forward a little, pressing his palms against the tile. He couldn’t look at Cas anymore as the urge to grab him and pin him to the wall was growing too strong.

Cas poured the liquid soap into his palm, his fingers rubbing together to form bubbly suds. He moved closer to Dean and started off slowly, massaging the soap into his back and between his shoulder blades.

“Mm...That feels nice, Cas.” Dean poked his ass out playfully, leaning back a little as Cas worked over his back.

Cas smiled again, working his way down Dean's back, taking his time. Hips, waist, ass; squeezing. Massaging. Working over him slowly.

Dean let out a soft sigh in pleasure. Cas’ hands were heavenly against his warm, damp skin. When they reached his ass, he bent over a little more, stretching his back out and keeping his palms flat against the wall.

Cas tilted his head a little, his smile twisting into a pleased smirk. Having Dean like that, palms on the wall, ass out was definitely spank bank material. He leaned over Dean to gently breathe against his ear, "would you mind doing me?"

“Mm, not at all.” Dean shivered despite the warm water. He stood up straight, turning around to face Cas. Biting his lip, he took the bottle of body wash from him.

"Thank you." Cas turned around, rolling his shoulders back a little and shaking his arms out. He was toned, clearly working hard on his back and ass; tanned, and smooth.

Dean started at his shoulders and slowly worked his way down, running his hands greedily over every muscle. “Goddamn. I need to hear your workout routine sometime,” he murmured.

"Mm, maybe working out together is an option,” he replied, eyes closed as he let out a pleased hum under Dean’s touch. It felt good.

“You mean more than we already do?” Dean smirked, indulging himself and letting his hands cup Cas’ firm ass and lightly squeezing.

Cas let out a pleased growl. He usually wasn't the one on the receiving end of an ass squeeze, but now he knew why Dean liked having his ass squeezed and smacked. It felt great.

Dean slid his hands down to gently caress his thighs, then moved back up. “Alright, all clean.” He chuckled, stepping back to rinse the soap off of himself.

"Mm..." Cas moved closer, grabbing Dean's hand and sliding it over his stomach and down between his legs. "Are you sure you got everywhere?" He asked, his eyes on Dean.

Dean bit his lip, his eyes trained on Cas as he watched him move his hand down his body. He stepped closer, a little leftover body wash still coating his hand. He backed him to the other wall, a smirk on his face.

“Mm, guess I did miss a spot. And the most important one, no less.” His fingers curled firmly around Cas’ cock, maintaining eye contact as he started to stroke him.

Cas did his best to contain a smile but man, that felt good. He jutted his hips out to grind into Dean's hand, his lips parted in a soft moan as he leaned into the wall. His head fell back against the tile, eyeing Dean.

Hearing Cas moan like that made Dean shiver again. He moved his hand a little faster, stepping closer and placing his other hand on the wall above Cas’ head.

Cas felt his breath escape him, his eyes glued to Dean as his mouth ran dry. He spread his legs just a touch, his body flushed with heat as his whole body pressed into the tiled wall in a desperate attempt to hold himself up.

"Fuck, Dean--" he panted, lips parted as his hips pushed up into Dean’s welcoming hand.

Dean watched him closely, starting to pant a little himself. He ran his thumb along the head of Cas’ cock, his own twitching a little.

“Yeah? That feel good?” Dean purred, encouraged by the sounds he was making.

"Yes, yes-" he whimpered, eyes fluttering closed. When anyone’s full attention was on Cas, he got a little flustered and he could get loud. "Please don't stop, Dean," he begg, pushing his hips up into Dean's welcoming palm.

Watching Cas all flushed and noisy like this was almost too much for him. He did as he was told, working his hand faster, as his other grasped at his hips to hold him steady.

Cas panted, his l face contorting to pure bliss as he felt his orgasm welling inside him. "Dean, Dean I’m close-- please, please let me come--" he pleaded

“Mm. Come for me, Cas,” Dean urged, his nails digging slightly into his hips as he worked his hand diligently.

He let out a loud cry, muffling it the best he could by biting down on his hand as his heavy eyes fell upon Dean, blown wide with lust as he came. 

Dean wished he could’ve heard him in full, but the muffled cry was still delicious. He pulled back, bringing his cum-soaked fingers to his lips and licking them clean. “Mmf.” His other hand stayed on Cas’ hip to keep him from falling over.

Cas’ thighs shook and he almost passed out watching Dean lick the warm cum from his fingers. Cas hazily pulled Dean in for a kiss, arms around his neck as he did his best to steady himself.

Dean smiled a little against his lips, holding his waist firmly as he kissed him back, the taste of Cas still on his tongue.

Cas pulled back, his forehead pressed against Dean’s, his heart racing. "Shall I serve you now?" He breathed out.

“You say that so formally.” Dean chuckled, reaching up and brushing his fingers through Cas’ dark hair. “Yes.”

"Mm, but isn't it hotter that I do?" He tilted his head back, a smile playing on his lips. 

“Fuck yes.” Dean ran his tongue out over his lips, leaning back against the wall.

"With my mouth or hand?" 

“Don’t care. Whatever you wanna do.”

Cas knelt down in front of Dean, starting off with slow, long pumps. He flicked his tongue out, caressing his tip and sliding the muscle against his slit as his hand picked up speed.

Dean let out a breath, extending his neck and leaning his head back while pushing his hips forward. “Mmf, Cas...that feels good.” He knew just how to touch him.

Cas slipped down a little further, his tongue tracing the vein under his hardened cock, his fingers sliding over in a very gentle yet precise movement, riling Dean up the best way he knew how.

Dean glanced down at Cas, letting out a breathy moan. Watching his tongue flick over his cock was very erotic and he cursed under his breath. “Fuck...”

Cas glanced up at him, more than pleased at his reaction as his free hand slipped up to cup and massage Dean’s balls, moaning as he sucked on Dean's tip. His hand and tongue worked faster.

Loud, gratuitous moans spilled from Dean’s lips, echoing around the shower walls. Cas worked him perfectly, unraveling him slowly until his breath caught in his throat. “Close...” he choked out.

He slid Dean's full length between his lips, working him quickly in hopes of milking Dean for every offered drop. 

Dean yanked on Cas’ hair, his hips bucking forward. He cried out loudly, his security guard’s name spilling from his lips as he came hard into his mouth. He was glad that the water from the shower was loud enough to mostly drown out the sound.

Cas swallowed smoothly, pulling back and lapping at Dean’s length, letting out a soft, low moan.  _ Fuck, _ the noises Dean made when he came were always absolute perfection. He drew himself to his feet as he licked his lips, his hands finding themselves to sit on Dean's hips 

Dean panted, leaning against Cas and relying on him to keep from falling over. “Fuck, that was good.” He laughed softly, resting his head on his shoulder for a few moments until he’d caught his breath.

“Whew. We should uh...probably get out of the shower.”

"I'm sure you would like to get to rehearsal sooner rather than later," Cas murmured, combing his fingers through Dean’s wet hair

“More like have to.” Dean sighed. If he could, he’d just spend the rest of the day in this hotel room with Cas. He leaned in, giving him a slow, sweet kiss before he shut off the water.

Cas melted a little, pulling Dean close as he met his lips in a fluttering pace. He peeled himself off of him slowly, his fingers tracing Dean's chest momentarily before he climbed out and patted himself down with one of the clean towels.

Dean sighed again, climbing out and drying himself off. He didn’t know when the next time he’d get to do this with Cas was. He had a concert, then they were flying to another city. And in a month, he may never see Cas again. And that really bothered him.

Cas reached for his clothes and pulled them on. Once his jeans were securely buckled around his waist, he checked his phone and almost died when he saw five missed calls from Jo. He excused himself and hurried to call her back as he slipped from the bathroom.

He was berated the second he answered his phone, her voice loud as he stammered out an excuse for not picking up.

Dean quickly blow-dried his hair, then went over to his suitcase to get dressed. His eyes trailed over to Cas, frowning a little when he saw the look of alarm on his face. He’d leave him be.

Putting on a pair of jeans and a t-shirt, he sat at the edge of his bed, deciding to call up his own breakfast.

Cas kept murmuring soft apologies, Jo giving up and finally telling him what she called for. He was being reassigned for today. He asked why and she launched into another speech about how she is the boss and unless he wants his ass on the first flight home, he will be down at the stadium in an hour.

He hung up with a sigh and his eyes fell on Dean. "I'm being reassigned for today. David will be your bodyguard," he murmured, displeased.

“Are you fucking kidding me?” Dean groaned. He didn’t understand why Jo was acting like this. He knew her well enough to know that Cas was being berated over the phone, and for nothing. “Can I talk to her? She has to listen to me.”

"Won’t that seem suspicious, Dean? What reason do you have to keep me as your bodyguard?" Cas asked, letting out a soft sigh.

“Uh...because you’re scheduled to be with me today. And she knows I don’t really like David, but we keep him because if he scares me, he sure as hell scares everyone else.” Dean shrugged. “If she can get all bitchy at you with no explanation, I can do the same to her. Isn’t this all supposed to be to take care of me anyway? I’m the one paying for all this shit.”

"I know, I just..." Cas trailed off. He didn’t want to cause issues or make anyone’s life harder. He was sarcastic and blunt, but he was also rather like a wallflower most of the time, a complete yes man.

“You’re not gonna get in trouble, Cas. And I may not even be able to do anything, but I at least deserve to know what the hell’s going on. Oh, and I ordered breakfast. Enough for two.”

Cas nodded a little, fidgeting with his shirt. He was nervous about Dean making his call but stayed silent as he waited for Dean to call and get it over with.

Dean placed his hand on Cas’ shoulder and lightly squeezed, trying to reassure him.

“Hey, Cas...tiel told me about some schedule changes today? What’s going on?”

"Oh, hello, Dean!" Her voice was soft and upbeat, almost like an entirely different person had just called and berated Dean. "Yes, I need Castiel to help with front house security tonight, so I have assigned you, David."

“Why can’t David do it instead of Castiel?” Dean rolled his eyes at her cheery response. She always acted fake around him.

"Castiel is a younger man, much more active. I would rather have him front and center with your security." She says, "if you would rather someone else as your bodyguard for tonight, I am willing to volunteer?"

Dean chewed his lip. He knew he couldn’t get Cas out of this without looking too suspicious. So now it was about if he’d prefer Jo or David looking out for him for the night. So he decided to answer with another question.

“Don’t you have more important things to do than supervise my party tonight? If you don’t then, fine.”

"I can do my job whilst protecting you Dean," she replied sweetly. She really was laying it on thick.

“Uh huh. Alright then. You’re on Dean duty tonight.” He chuckled. “See ya in a bit.” He hung up, turning to look at Cas.

“Looks like I’m getting babysat by Jo tonight. Aren’t I lucky?”

“Mm, have fun with that." Cas couldn't help but wonder about what Meg said; did Jo really have a crush on Dean? "I need to go. I will talk to you later; good luck at the show." Cas shot him a warm smile, shoving his shoes back on and making a quick escape out of the hotel room and towards the stadium.

“Okay. I ordered you breakfast...but I guess I can save it. Thank you.” Dean chewed his lip as he watched Cas leave. Maybe this space would be good. He was already becoming too attached to him.

He accepted the breakfast cart when it arrived and sat down to eat it, alone.

***

Jo turned up right on time, her blonde hair pulled into a loose ponytail and wearing her usual black shorts that rode about mid-thigh and a tight-fitting black shirt. She knocked on Dean's door. "Dean, it's Jo. Can I come in?"

Dean got up and answered the door, wiping his mouth with the back of his hand to remove the stray chocolate muffin crumbs from his breakfast.

“Hey, what’s up?”

"Just wanted to check to see if you needed anything before I started my shift," she responded, fluttering her long lashes and giving him a smile.

“What, like a handjob?” Dean teased, pushing the breakfast cart out to the hall where it was out of his way. “Nah, I’m good.”

She looked alarmed at first before he clarified it as a joke. Relieved, she nodded her head a little and plastered that bright smile back onto her face. She then stepped inside the room and stood to the side, taking guard.

Dean winked at her before heading into the bathroom to get ready. Maybe he didn’t have the same rapport with her as he did with Cas, but he could still mess around plenty. He washed his face, then brushed his teeth, giving himself a once over in the bathroom mirror before walking out and over to Jo. “So, when do I have to be at rehearsal?”

"The concert starts at 6 so rehearsal is at 2. Giving you a break in the middle," she informed him, her fingers clasped in front of her as she looked over him.

“Awesome. So I’ve got another two hours before I have to be there?” Dean asked, taking a seat on the edge of his bed.

"Yes." 

Dean grabbed the remote, switching on the TV. “You wouldn’t happen to know any French, would you? Can’t figure out any of these damn channels.” He sighed.

"I know a little. What would you like to watch?" She asked, moving closer and holding out her hand for the remote.

Dean passed it to her and shrugged. “Don’t care. Just not whatever these weird ass soap operas are.” He chuckled.

He missed Cas, already. There was no denying it. The two hours with him would go by quickly, but now, he was stuck with Jo and French TV.

She flicked through and settled on a football game, passing him the remote. She stayed close by, watching him, "I like football, I used to play a little in high school." 

Dean raised an eyebrow at her. He didn’t really like sports that much, but he wasn’t going to say anything. That didn’t surprise him at all, though. And he wondered if she was saying this to try and impress him.

“Oh, cool,” he replied casually, sitting up a little. At least this didn’t require French to understand what was going on.

She fell silent, moving her gaze to the tv and watching. She felt a little stupid. Why did she have to say that?

Dean glanced over at her again. “What is it with you bodyguards and standing there stiffly like someone’s gonna bust in the room and murder me at any second? You can like, sit down if you want. There are cameras in the hallway and a deadbolt on the door, so no one will catch you off guard.”

"My job is to protect you. Does Castiel slack off on the job and sit with you?" She asked, her bright eyes trained on him accusingly.

“No,” Dean replied quickly. “Hence me saying ‘you bodyguards.’” He shrugged. “There’s just...nothing to protect me from right now, but whatever.”

This was going to be a lot more painful than he thought. He had to be extremely careful with his words.

"If you would feel better, I can leave and return when you are ready to go?" She offered. Jo wanted to stay, continue her attempts at awful conversation, but he was the boss. What he says goes.

“Oh, so it’s not safe for you to sit down, but it’s safe for you to leave the room entirely?” Dean shook his head. “You can stay. It’s just...kinda creepy to have you standing there.”

"It's not professional of me to sit down on the job. But you’re free to dismiss me if you find it uncomfortable," she clarified.

“Alright, whatever.” Dean sighed. He just didn’t want to be alone to his thoughts, even if that did mean being in the company of Jo. It wouldn’t be too long anyway. “You can keep standing there.”

She nodded, hanging around close by and making the occasional attempt at conversation albeit it lacking any substance.

Dean got up and switched off the TV once it was time to head out. He slid on his boots, jacket, then sunglasses and started out the door. It was then that he noticed how tight Jo’s shirt was and he smirked a little.

“That a regulated uniform you’re wearing?” He asked in passing on his way to the elevator.

She followed a few steps behind. "Sh, yes, sir. I make sure all my employees are in their correct uniforms, including myself." Although her shirt was pushing it, her shorts were even more. 

Dean’s eyes slowly trailed down to her legs, then back up to her face, nodding with a hint of a sly smile. He’d probably die if he ever saw Cas in shorts like those.

“I see,” he replied easily. “Well, I approve.” He stepped inside the elevator and pushed the button.

She grew a little sheepish and smiled, following behind him. She was happy with that statement, finding herself a little shy and flushed under the sort of compliment. Anyone else she would have hit for directing that kind of comment her way, but Dean on the other hand...

“You wanna ride in the limo with me?” Dean asked. It would likely be awkward, but again, he needed a distraction so he’d stop thinking about Cas. The last thing he needed was for them to get found out because he couldn’t keep himself together.

"Really? Sure." She perked up, her smile bright as they made their way out of the elevator and on the way to the limo. She had seen the way Cas received special treatment, maybe this is how Dean was with his bodyguards?

“Yeah. Y’know, it makes me feel safer.” Dean returned her smile, walking out the main doors from the lobby and hopping into the awaited limousine. As per usual, he stretched out across one of the long seats.

She climbed in after him, sitting across from him. She then closed the door and the driver set off. "So, what do you usually do with your security in here? I have always been curious."

“Mm, I’m afraid that’s classified information.” Dean smirked. He did nothing but sit in the limo, sometimes talk, but this was an opportunity to tease Jo and he’d take it.

“Why? What do you think I do? I’m sure you’ve got theories.”

“I do have my theories, but no proof," she stated, glancing at Dean. She would eventually prove that Castiel was up to no good and the earlier she could fire him with cause, the better.

Dean sat up a little, leaning forward and resting his chin in his hands, his interest piqued. “Oh yeah? Like what?”

"I'm sure you are well aware of your own reputation, Dean, although I do hope that’s not the case here." 

“My reputation?” Dean chewed his lip, looking displeased and a little offended. “I don’t think a limo’s the most suitable place for that. It’s a short ride and the driver’s right up there in front of the partition.”

She half shrugged. There were plenty of things he could do in the back of a limo. "I'm sorry if i have offended you, Dean."

“Do you not like Cas very much?” Dean asked, brushing off her apology. “I don’t get why. You know the high turnaround rate of my security guards. I’m picky. But I like him. So that must mean he’s doing a good job, right? He handles my parties, does everything I say, and shows up whenever he needs to.”

Dean sighed. “He didn’t answer the phone this morning because I made him go complain about my breakfast being late,” he lied. 

"He isn't a good fit with this team. I’m glad I only signed his contract for three months. I wouldn't want to extend it further." But it wasn't that he wasn't a good fit. He was gorgeous, and she felt threatened by him. "I'm sure we will find you someone better." Jo nodded firmly. 

“How isn’t he a good fit? I just told you I liked him. He does a better job than anyone else I’ve ever had. Don’t think you’re gonna find anyone better, honestly. But I know he’s leaving after this tour.”

"He doesn't get along with the team. I can't have that. And yes, he is." She was glad he already found another job, but she would get rid of him sooner if she could.

“Uh huh.” Dean didn’t believe a word of it, but he played along. “Well, I’m sorry he doesn’t seem to be getting along with the team. But you’re a professional, Jo, right? So I’m sure you wouldn’t let petty things get in the way if I like him working for me.” He smiled.

She opened her mouth to say something, but she was absolutely speechless. She was fuming, her nose wrinkling just a touch. "You are right," She murmured, but she was reeling inside.

“Good.” Dean went back to stretching out across the seat, his eyes still on her. “Don’t worry. I still think you’re the prettiest.”

Jo’s cheeks flushed; she was still too flustered to speak, her eyes dragging to stare out the window.

Dean chuckled. His suspicions were confirmed. She absolutely did have a crush on him. Now, he just needed to exploit that to make sure Cas kept his job for as long as possible. Maybe it was a little cruel. After all, Jo did a lot for him. But if she was going to be petty and try to get Cas fired over feelings, he wasn’t above stooping to her level. 

When the limo pulled up to the venue, she stepped out first, taking a glance around at the thousands of fans that were already lined up, waiting for the venue to open in a few hours.

Dean kept his head down as he walked out, standing close to Jo and waving at the fans who could see him. He was thankful for the barricades as he was led around to the back entrance to head to the stage.

Jo kept close to Dean, shooting the fans warning glances as she dragged her way out to the stage. She kept her distance, mostly just staying out of the way so Dean could rehearse in peace.

Dean made it backstage, removing his sunglasses and jacket and setting it on the chair of his dressing room. The speakers and his guitars were all set up for him, and he grabbed one as he made his way onstage to start the rehearsal. He lost himself in his performance. He always treated every rehearsal like it was the real deal, having any available team members stand in the front row to act as his audience. But Cas wasn’t there.

Jo was more than happy to watch Dean rehearse. She loved his music and the way he played. It was hypnotising to her and she often only listened to him. Every other music was dull in comparison; she felt like each word was written just for her.

Meanwhile, Cas was miserable. He was stuck outside, on the sidelines made to watch fans in case they tried anything. It was boring. And with the soft patter of rain, he was less impressed. It dampened his hair and shirt, making him look like a soggy puppy. But he could hear Dean rehearsing, and that made him smile a little.

Dean went backstage again once he was finished, changing into his performance clothes. He was back in the leather pants and t-shirt that would come off after the first or second song. Taking a seat in his chair, he sat for his makeup.

Cas was moved to the front lines to help search bags and ask the standard questions as each excitable fan was filtered into the venue. Cas missed Dean, he wished he could watch him get ready rather than being stuck outside and rained on.

Once Dean was all set to go, he waited backstage while the opening band performed, sipping from a can of beer and lounging around on the couch.

When it was time for him to go onstage, the lights dimmed, then went up and the crowd roared. He’d gotten better at his introduction since the last concert. “Bonjour Paris! Who’s ready to fuckin’ rock?” 

Once the fans were settled in, Cas' job was simple. He went on break and had two hours to kill while the concert played out. Cas wanted to go in and watch, but he knew with Jo lurking around, it might seem a little suspicious. So after a dry, tasteless dinner, he went out to look around the venue a little more. The good thing for sure about being stuck outside despite the gloomy weather, was most definitely the view of the city.

Jo stood nearby, her eyes glued to Dean as he started on his usual concert ways and she felt a little smug about the fact that she could be backstage while Cas was stuck elsewhere.

Dean was about halfway through the first part of the show when it happened. A fan jumped on stage, clearly very intoxicated and reaching out for him. Now he really missed Cas, but he knew someone else on the team could handle it. He stepped back, pausing the concert as per usual to wait. He wondered if he’d ever get through a performance without this happening.

Jo was the first one to respond, although nowhere near as quick as Cas, hurrying out to try and move the clearly drunk fan away from Dean and towards the side.

“Ooh, Dean has a girlfriend!” The drunken girl exclaimed, noting that Jo didn’t look like a security guard at all.

And that was why he needed Cas. For the first time in his life, he was mortified, publicly, and he bolted offstage, wanting nothing more in that moment than to be in Cas’ arms. But he couldn’t.

"Ma'am, I'm asking you-" The situation violently changed as the crowd fell into an uproar over the comment, the girl reaching and pulling Jo’s hair, whaling on her as Jo let out a cry, gritting her teeth. It was a tussle and it took three security guards to pry the fan from Jo and take her outside.

By this point, the fans weren't having it, screaming, throwing things, Jo running off stage in tears as security did their best to help with the situation. But what could they do without Dean? 


	10. "Classy"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Song lyric creds: All Our Own by Radio Company 
> 
> This chapter is a bit shorter than usual, but the next one will be back to normal length! Thank you everyone for your kudos, comments, and continued support of this fic. Each one means a lot and keeps us going.

Hearing the commotion inside, Cas stepped in and peered around. He saw Jo, all the security, but no Dean. How was this not their priority? Regardless of what happened. The young male hurried around, softly calling out Dean’s name as he looked for him.

Dean had slipped into the bathroom, locking the door and leaning against the wall. His heart was racing and his hands felt all tingly, in a bad way. It felt like he couldn’t breathe, that the walls were closing in on him. He didn’t know why he’d been so shaken by that comment, but the way the crowd responded was enough to make him want to run. It was going to be a PR nightmare, and he wasn’t ready to deal with it.

Upon hearing Cas’ voice, he was pulled back to reality, his hand trembling slightly as he unlocked the bathroom door and poked his head out. “Come here!” He urged, shutting it again before anyone else noticed.

Cas was bewildered at whatever was happening, rushing to Dean’s side and looking utterly confused as he was locked inside. "What happened? Are you okay?" He asked, looking over Dean.

Dean threw his arms around Cas, burying his face in the crook of his neck. “Fuck!” He groaned into his shoulder, on the verge of tears.

“I’m fucked, Cas. The whole world’s gonna think Jo’s my girlfriend. This is gonna be a nightmare to clean up. And the fans are going crazy out there. I-I don’t know if I can go back out there. That bitch! This is exactly what she wanted!”

"Oh- alright okay." Cas could find out the details later. He wasn’t sure how long they could keep the crowd waiting. He rubbed Dean’s back soothingly.

"They think you have a girlfriend? So what? Prove them wrong. Fans believe their idols before anyone else. You are good with the ladies. Charm them, invite one up on stage and serenade her. You are Dean Winchester."

Dean didn’t feel much like himself, but Cas was right. “I needed you today,” he admitted. “Spending it with Jo was...not great. And she’s hellbent on getting you fired. But look what fucking happened when she was put in charge of me and not you. This never would’ve happened if you were guarding the stage.”

He sighed. “I don’t wanna go back out there.”

Cas peeled himself from Dean and cupped his face, making him look at him properly, "Dean. Look at me. This is your show. If you want to cut it short, you can. Or if you want to take some time, gather yourself and get back out there, you can. Nothing can alter what happened right now on that stage. But it's your choice what happens from here."

Dean nodded slowly, already feeling much calmer just by looking into Cas’ eyes. He swallowed thickly, then cleared his throat. “Alright. I’ll try.” He pulled back, glancing at himself in the mirror. He looked like a complete mess, the makeup running down his cheeks and his eyes red and puffy. He couldn’t go out like that.

"Alright. Okay, just, wait-" Cas dug through his bag, pulling out a makeup kit. He carried all of Dean's emergency supplies, and considering he used to work in a strip club, he was a boss with a makeup brush. "Sit." Cas pointed to the sink. He moved closer, in total concentration as he wiped his eyes and got to work.

“What would I do without you?” Dean mused, taking a seat on a small stool in front of the sink as instructed and letting Cas fix his face. Once again, he was extremely impressed by him. It seemed like there was hardly anything Cas couldn’t do.

Once he was done, Dean took a look at himself in the mirror. He looked normal again, the puffiness in his eyes covered by concealer.

“Thank you.” He stood, pulling him in for another tight hug.

As he was curled into another hug, Cas was surprised, but glad. He cuddled Dean close, pressing his nose into his neck and letting his eyes close for a moment. "Welcome."

Dean pulled back slowly, giving himself another glance in the mirror. He was still shirtless, but he didn’t want to go back onstage that way now.

“I’ll see you after the show.” He kissed Cas’ cheek before leaving the bathroom.

Cas nodded, making his way from the bathroom, and hurried off to find where everyone had gone. He found David, who announced that Jo had gone back to the hotel which was best, and Cas was resuming his role as bodyguard. They had called in backup for when the show was over just in case as well.

Heading back toward the stage, Dean grabbed his microphone and guitar and faced the crowd, feeling much more confident now.

He raised the mic to his lips. “Alright, folks. Some crazy shit when down tonight, huh? But you were promised a concert tonight, and you’re gonna get one. I think we should clear the air a little bit first though, right? Before TMZ eats me alive.”

“I know at a lot of my shows, some people have a little too much to drink and try and come up onstage. And that’s dangerous for me because I don’t know what they’re gonna do. So we have security take them away. That woman you saw up there tonight is Jo. She’s the head of my security team, and  _ not _ my girlfriend. I don’t have a girlfriend, alright? Not that it’s anyone’s business anyway.” He sighed.

“But since people seem to be so eager to come up on stage tonight, why don’t we do that? I’m gonna pick two of you.” He looked around at the cheering crowd, a wide smile on his face. “Randomly by seat. So uh, let’s see...B13 and L22 come on up. Bring your tickets as proof.”

Cas had found his way to stand off to the side, smiling softly at Dean’s little speech. He was proud of him. The Dean on stage was far different than the red-faced Dean crying in the bathroom. 

"Mm, isn't he handsome?" Meg cooed from behind Cas and he almost jumped, feeling a somewhat flush of guilt.

"Shut up. Why aren't you doing your job?" He hissed.

"I'm on break~" she answered with ease. He narrowed his eyes, not quite believing her.

When Dean announced he was bringing people up on stage, the security team checked the girls’ tickets before letting them through. Cas stayed on hand by the curtain just in case.

“Now I’m gonna sing a new song for you all tonight. Not that you’ve earned it...but, I’m feeling generous.” Dean chuckled, switching to a wearable mic so he had his hands free. He extended his hand to dance with one of the girls brought onstage as the band started to play.

Cas tried to stand stiff, professional, as Meg was lurking around like a bad smell. His eyes were trained on Dean to watch his performance, ignoring her as she chattered on mindlessly.

“This one’s a little slower than what I usually play, so bear with me.” He spun one of the girls around, then took a turn with the other, a smile on his face as he sang into the headset mic.

_ “Listened to yesterday. Long before the way it has become. And it all came down to you. I don’t really know the way. Played out stranger than it seemed. But what went down came true. Like an all day dream.” _

Cas was moved by the song; it was much more his speed than Dean’s other music. Slow and full of emotion. Meg gave up grovelling for attention, wandering off.

He leaned against the stage wall, his eyes glued to the performance.

_ “I don’t want to be the one to say it’s wrong when the heavens open and a new day comes along. I know I would rather be together alone in a big top circle and a world we can call our own. It’s all our own.” _

Dean sang through the rest of the song, giving each girl a kiss on the hand before letting them return to their seats.

He switched back to his hand-held mic, waiting for the applause to finish. The crowd completely ate it up.

Cas felt a sense of ease. Dean did such a great job smoothing over the situation. He could have wallowed and bailed out, but he stayed for the fans. And that was admirable.

The rest of the concert played out relatively smoothly and Dean walked off stage after the encore, thoroughly exhausted. He sat on the couch in his dressing room, chugging down a bottle of water.

Cas hurried after Dean, doing his best to keep up and just keeping shy of running into him. When he flopped on the couch, chugging water, Cas smiled a little. "You handled that situation very well. You should be proud of yourself." 

“Thanks.” Dean smiled back at him, crushing the emptied water bottle in his hand and tossing it to the trash can. He made it in that time. “I hope I fixed things.”

"Mm, only time will tell," Cas answered, shifting a little in the doorway. "Would you like me to organize your hotel room for the after party?" He asked, unsure if Jo had even begun preparations before she left.

“Yeah, please.” Dean sat up, looking over at him. “If Jo’s up for it, she can be on duty for the party tonight, so you don’t have to. You can rest, then meet me in my room afterward?”

"Jo is pretty beat up; I'm sure it's not wise for her to attend your party. And I'm well aware of what goes on. I will be fine." 

Dean sighed. “Well, this is kind of her fault. She wants to get you fired, but she just proved tonight that you’re a better guard than she is. But we don’t have to get into that right now. I’ll uh, we can talk about it later.”

"If you wish." He really didn't want to call and organize an orgy party for Dean. It wasn’t at all the way he wanted to spend his night, but he had to do his job.

"I will be outside the door if you need me," He told Dean, gesturing as he started to make phone calls.

“Thank you!” Dean called out as Cas left, taking the moment to change out of his stage outfit. It was his last night in Paris, and he wanted to do something a little different. His parties were infamous for being tasteless, so he wanted to try something a bit classier, at least...to start out with, so he went to his wardrobe and pulled out a full black suit and tie, changing into it.

Cas hung up and let out a sigh, letting his head fall back against the wall. What fucked-up mess had he gotten himself into? He grumbled to himself, waiting for Dean to finish getting ready and join him.

Dean adjusted his tie, smoothing his hair back in the mirror before meeting Cas outside. “I thought I’d do something a little different this time, what do you think?” He smirked.

Cas looked up at Dean through his lashes and almost dropped his phone. Dean always looked good, but there was something about a suit that brought a level of class. "Uh, good." He cleared his throat, trying not to appear flustered.

Dean chuckled. He had an idea Cas liked it a bit more than he was letting on. “Thank you.” He headed out the back entrance of the venue and toward the awaiting limo, climbing inside.

Cas pushed his phone into his pocket, scolding himself for acting like a child as he hurried after Dean. He climbed into the limo and closed the door firmly. "Drinks and champagne are organized for your hotel room; do you require anything else?"

“Nope. That’s perfect, Cas. Thank you. You really saved my ass tonight.” Dean stretched out, thinking back to what Jo accused him of in the limo. And ironically, that was the one thing he was innocent of. But it sure gave him ideas.

“Y’know, Jo asked me what happens when I bring security into the limo. Isn’t that funny? Never thought to do anything in here before.”

"Hm, surprised it hasn't crossed your mind to be honest. Considering that was my fear when I first started being asked to ride in here with you," Cas told him, his eyes out the window.

“Really?” Dean raised an eyebrow. People apparently thought a lot less of him than he realized, even Cas. “I wouldn’t...do that, Cas. I mean, now maybe. But not when I hardly knew you.”

"All I had to go off is what others told me. Reputations can be exaggerated, especially when hearing things from multiple people. With all the...companions...you have come and go from your hotel rooms, they speculate without asking." Cas turned his attention back to Dean. "I know better now."

Dean nodded. “I get it.” He sighed, leaning back against his seat and looking at Cas. “I think Jo’s just jealous. Of you. She says you don’t get along well with the team but I think that’s bullshit, right?”

Cas half shrugged, "I get along okay with them. I'm just with you most of the time, so." He tilted his head a little. "Does it matter?"

“Yeah, because it means she lied to me.” Dean grumbled under his breath. “She goes on and on about you not being professional, then pulls this shit. It’s ridiculous.”

"She doesn't like me, Dean. It's obvious she wants me gone. It really doesn't matter," he muttered. He was used to this.

“Well, it pisses me off. It seems like you’re the only one around here who actually gives a shit about my safety. Everyone else is just...trying to keep their job, or trying to get close to me and it seems like it doesn’t actually matter what’s best for me. I know that’s the norm in this business, but if the whole point is to keep me safe, this kinda defeats the purpose.”

"We care about your safety, Dean; that is our job. We just don't care about each other. It’s cutthroat for top jobs like this."

“I know. But what I want isn’t being considered at all. It’s not your fault and I’m sorry I’m complaining, but I was put at risk tonight because Jo has a personal vendetta against you and that’s not okay.”

"Perhaps making a complaint to her boss will have her reprimanded," Cas suggested, leaning back against the leather seat.

“Oh, god. Going to the agency’s a nightmare. You haven’t met Crowley yet, have you?”

Cas shook his head.

“But I guess I will if I have to,” Dean continued. “I think she’s gotten her punishment for the night though, and if she doesn’t learn her lesson after that, well, I’ll do it.” Dean pinched the bridge of his nose.

“Anyway, this conversation derailed, but I was gonna ask if you wanted to make out in the limo. Since the idea was put into my head now...”

Cas wasn't particularly in the mood, but he thought it might be a good distraction for the night he was about to endure. Plus, Dean looked damn good in his suit. He tugged the rock star over to his side of the limo by his tie, pulling him into a deep kiss.

“Mm.” Dean smirked a little, taking a seat beside Cas and wrapping his arms around his waist. He couldn’t believe he hadn’t considered this before. He felt stupid. After all, sex was the main way his brain operated. He licked across Cas’ lips, gently squeezing his hips.

Cas sat up, hiking up his pants just a touch to comfortably straddle Dean’s hips. He pulled him closer, his hands wrapping around Dean’s neck. This felt...exciting. The windows were tinted and the partition was rolled up, but he still felt the slight thrill that came with a risk of being seen. He let out a pleased sigh, squeezing Dean’s legs with his thighs.

“Mmf,” Dean grunted, slipping his tongue into Cas’ mouth. He moaned softly, reaching up to lightly tug on his hair. His heart raced a little, his back pressed against the warm leather seat as he gave himself to Cas.

Cas growled lightly, devouring Dean’s mouth as his hair was pulled, a deep moan rumbling inside Cas' chest. He bit Dean’s bottom lip, his arousal surging as he tugged lightly with his teeth. If they had more time, he would’ve bent Dean right over the seat and taken him, taken out all his frustrations for the night and possibly even tire him out too much for his party. He craved being alone with the rock star for the rest of the night, but he knew that he couldn’t. He couldn’t let himself sink further into the hole he’d been digging with Dean. 

Dean panted a little, pulling back once he needed to breathe. “Fuck,” he murmured, looking into Cas’ eyes. “This is so hot...”

Cas nodded, his eyes searching Dean’s as his comment snapped him back to reality. His thumb dragged across the bottom of Dean's lip slowly. With his heart racing, he did his best to try and regain his composure. His eyes fell to the window; they were almost back to the hotel.

Dean let out a breath. It drove him crazy when Cas did that and he flicked his tongue out, licking across the tip of his thumb.

“Plenty more where that came from, alright?” He smiled, keeping Cas close to him until it was time to get out of the limo.

Cas smiled a little, pulling back entirely as he climbed out of the car. His fingers pushed through his hair as he was met once again with the rain. It seemingly matched his mood.

Dean hadn’t realized it’d been raining, too distracted with everything else going on. He groaned as he stepped out, running as quickly as he could into the hotel lobby to avoid getting his suit wet. He smoothed it down once inside, pressing the button for the elevators.

Cas jogged to keep up with him, clearly unimpressed. "You aren't going to melt, Dean. Don't be dramatic." He scowled a little, brows furrowed in disdain.

“Yeah, but this tie is silk. Can’t get it wet.” Dean held the elevator door for Cas, reaching over and brushing his fingers through his slightly damp hair. “Mm. Grumpy and wet is a good look on you.”

"It's a tie." He seemed exasperated. He didn't know what that meant and he wouldn't be able to tell the difference between silk and sateen. He blinked up at Dean and formed a slight pout.

Dean chuckled, gently tilting up Cas’ chin and planting a soft kiss to his pouted lips. He pulled back as the elevator dinged and the doors opened to his floor. He turned, straightening his jacket as he walked down the hallway to his room.

Cas felt himself swoon a little and he had to catch himself. His frown returned, following Dean out of the elevator and toward the hotel room.

Dean unlocked the door and walked inside, flicking on the lights. “Alright, uh, guests are supposed to be here in about fifteen minutes. Should be enough time to set up.” The cart of champagne and glasses was already waiting outside the door.

"I will help set up, but..." Cas hesitated for a moment. "I’m staying outside." 

“Okay,” Dean agreed. He wasn’t going to fight Cas on this one, knowing it was a bit of a sensitive issue. And he’d done this hundreds of times with the guard outside the door and been perfectly fine. He was still close enough that Dean could yell if he needed help.

Cas nodded, fixing up for the party before stepping out and closing the door. He let out a slow sigh. He just wanted to go back to his room. Why did he have to do this? Why was he even annoyed about it?

Dean waited for the guests to arrive and Cas to check them over before he opened the door and welcomed them in. He knew there’d likely be some questions he had to answer after the concert tonight, and he wasn’t looking forward to that. So he started with the drinks this time, passing everyone a glass of champagne as they entered.

He went through his usual routine, drinking and socializing and playing a few songs for them. He didn’t drink nearly as much this time as he did typically, learning from his past mistakes. And he wanted to be conscious enough to spend time with Cas afterward.

He felt a little guilty, having Cas stand outside silently while he partied. He knew it was Cas’ job, and Dean did these parties for his fans. Even though he did enjoy them a lot, it still felt off to him. He tried to ignore the feeling, to have fun despite the voice in the back of his mind berating him, but it was hard to shake.

Cas was like a ghost when it came to his job. He moved quietly and he was someone that could be looked over by mistake. He sat against the wall outside Dean’s door, a small notebook in hand as he kept himself distracted, writing and sketching whatever came to mind.

Dean got bored and ended the party a little earlier than he normally did. He wasn’t sure what was going on with him. Maybe it was due to the craziness of the day, but he wasn’t feeling it. He got dressed, making sure everyone else was clothed and had their belongings before he turned the lights back on and opened the door, bidding everyone a good night.

Cas peeled himself from the wall, pushing his notebook into the pocket of his jacket. He lifted his eyes, meeting that of a cute brunette. She was pretty. He wasn't one for women but he couldn't help it. He smiled sheepishly. She was a little tipsy but kept exclaiming how handsome he was. She took out some paper from her handbag and scribbled her name and her phone number underneath.

Once Cas had made sure all the guests had safely gotten to their cars, he tucked her phone number into his pocket and thanked her even though they were leaving the next day. But it’d done enough to boost his self-esteem and give him the spark of energy he needed to finish handling Dean.

Cas made his way back up, entering the hotel room. "Anything else you need?"

Dean was still in his suit, his tie haphazardly draped around his neck and the buttons done up incorrectly on his shirt. He smiled when Cas walked in, then shook his head.

“Nope. Just your company, if that’s okay.”

"Not really up to fucking you tonight; I’m tired. I’m just going back to my room if you don't need me," he replied, exhausted

“You don’t have to fuck me. I’m uh, good to go in that department for the night. But I thought maybe you’d want to stay and just, rest here? I mean, it’s so much effort to go  _ all  _ the way to your own room when there’s a comfy bed right here, isn’t it?”

"No, I don't want to sleep on your orgy bed, thanks." Cas zipped up his jacket. 

“My orgy b-” Dean didn’t know what to say to that. Why was Cas acting so bitter?

"See you in the morning," he said, closing the hotel room door and heading down to his own room. He refused to be Dean's emotional buffer.

“Fine.” He watched him leave, absolutely regretting not drinking that much during the party. He felt like he needed it now.

Dean had managed to get out of his suit in time not to ruin it and sat in his underwear on the floor of the hotel room, sipping straight from a bottle of leftover champagne. Maybe it was directly to spite Cas, as he’d called drinking from the bottle “classy” sarcastically. Or maybe he just felt like further self-sabotaging after the previous day had gone downhill so quickly. He ended the night puking into the toilet, then dragging himself back into bed and curling up on his “orgy” sheets.

When Cas woke him up the next morning, he felt like someone had driven a blade through his head.


	11. Pushing Buttons

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is pretty much just smut. (But it's important to the plot. We promise!) Enjoy

Cas tidied Dean’s room after waking him, placing an aspirin and bottle of water on the bedside table for him. He stood near the bed, looking down at him with pity in his eyes. "Take this. Your breakfast will be here at ten."

Dean reached out and grabbed the pills, taking them and sipping the water, then pulling a pillow over his head to drown out the light. He didn’t know why he always did this shit.

Cas made his way to the curtains and shut them, throwing a disappointed look Dean's way. Why did he always do this to himself?

“At least I made it to the toilet,” Dean grumbled, rolling over onto his back, but keeping the pillow shielding his face. “Fuck. Can you make it any darker in here?”

Cas rolled his eyes. "Good job not choking on your own vomit," he muttered, flicking off the room lights to shroud them in darkness.

“Thank you.” Dean sat up, blinking a few times. The darkness made it easier to exist at the moment. “How was your night?”

"I stood outside your door all night and then went to bed; thought that was pretty self explanatory. I assume you drank more after I left?"

“Mm, maybe a little bit. I didn’t have anyone else to talk to, and champagne never judges me, so...” Dean shrugged, carefully climbing out of bed, but his entire body ached.

"A champagne hangover. Of course." Cas tucked his hands into his pockets and leaned against the wall, tipping his head back to watch Dean through the darkness.

“Yeah, it’s what was available.” Dean shrugged, putting on a pair of sunglasses and flicking the lights back on. He looked absolutely ridiculous, wearing a pair of boxers and sunglasses, and his hair a complete mess.

Cas couldn't help but laugh a little. "You gonna board the plane like that?"

“Yes,” Dean replied in a blunt, monotone voice, crossing his arms. “And y’know what? I’m still gonna get laid.” He stuck his tongue out, hobbling into the bathroom to splash some cold water on his face.

"Oh yes, your plane hooker. I forgot." He rolled his eyes again at Dean’s childish behavior, letting out a low sigh. How did their conversations always reach a petty level?

“Don’t call her that.” Dean frowned, drying his hands on a towel before leaving the bathroom. “She doesn’t get paid to have sex with me. She’s an actual flight attendant. We just...worked out an agreement a while back.”

"Sorry. Flight attendant with benefits." Cas didn't open his eyes, much too tired. His head was throbbing and he just hoped his sore throat would be gone soon; this weather just threw him off. 

“Sure, yeah. But you should be thanking her. I don’t do well on planes. I’m terrified of them and she helps a lot.” Dean walked over to his suitcase, slipping out of his boxers and pulling on the pair of leggings he always wore for flights, paired with an over sized white t-shirt with the sleeves cut off.

"Mm, I will be sure to thank her for sucking your dick next time I see her.” Although he had no idea that Dean was scared of flying. He always seemed so confident.

Dean rolled his eyes, though of course Cas couldn’t see behind the glasses. “You do that.” He crossed his arms, walking over to sit back on the edge of his bed.

Cas was more stubborn than Dean; he could stand there in total, awkward silence all morning without batting an eye.

Dean got up as soon as his breakfast had arrived, opening the door and pulling the cart in. He ate in silence, not so much as looking in Cas’ direction as he sipped down two cups of coffee and ate a stack of pancakes. He felt better after that, but still kept the glasses on. He didn’t know what was going on between them, what caused such sudden animosity. He never could tell where they stood with one another.

Cas had wandered off into his own little dreamland. He was exhausted, and he was tempted to ask someone to fill in for him, but with Jo on temporary suspension, he wasn't going to ask Meg to cover.

Dean finished his breakfast, then got up and pushed the cart over to the wall to be dealt with later. He retreated to his bed, staring up at the ceiling, his hands behind his head.

“Cas,” he said after a moment in a hoarse voice, eager to end the uncomfortable silence that looked between them. “Are you excited for Rome?”

Cas pushed the cart outside, his eyes falling to Dean, his blue eyes boring into him. "I suppose. You?” He asked, his answer short and impersonal. All he wanted was to crawl back into his bed in LA.

“Come on, it’ll be fun! Another city with great food to be a tourist in. We can go around the city on my day off again.” Dean tried to liven the mood, even if Cas wasn’t having it.

"...Alright," Cas answered slowly, his voice low as he watched Dean. Was this a game to Dean? It felt like it was; see how far along he can drag the poor security guard until he breaks him. Or was Dean really that oblivious to what he was doing?

“Someone’s super grumpy today and I’m the one with the hangover.” Dean chuckled. “You can sleep on the plane. I won’t bother you.”

"Mm." Cas was unsure if he should say something at all but he was already in a bad head space, so, fuck it. "I will no longer be your bodyguard during your parties. David will be taking over." He hadn’t asked him, but he figured if he slipped him some cash on the side, he wouldn't ask questions.

“Oh. Okay.” Dean was caught a little off guard by the statement, but even he knew better than to push too far with Cas at the moment. “I know they run kinda late. Sorry about that...”

"That's not my issue with them.”

“Oh. Then what is?” Dean asked, oblivious. 

“Would you like any help packing your luggage?" Cas asked, dodging the question completely. His eyes fell to the mess of clothes on the floor.

“Yeah, please.” 

Cas started clearing up the floor, scooping up the clothes and shaking them out, then rolling them up carefully and placing them in his suitcase. It took him a moment to properly articulate what he wanted to say.

"I-" he wrinkled his nose. "I don't want to waste my night, standing guard and listening to you bang a bunch of barely legal jailbait-looking drunken fangirls."

“Waste your night? It’s your job, Cas. You’re getting paid to do this and it didn’t seem to bother you before.” Dean sighed. “And they’re not that much younger than me anyway.” He felt offended again, that everyone, Cas included, thought there wasn’t much more to him than this.

Cas couldn't argue with that; he couldn't argue without explaining that he was a little jealous. He wanted to spend time with Dean without it being work. Without having to stand guard as he gang-banged his groupies. So instead, he just clenched his jaw, relaxed, and took a minute before murmuring. "You are right. I’m sorry."

“But it’s fine. I don’t wanna make you do something you don’t wanna do. I don’t need to understand why.” Dean went over to his suitcase, double checking that everything was packed before he zipped it up.

Cas took the bag, placing it by the door before resuming his stance and zipping his jacket up. He knew that all he’d be doing on the flight would be sleeping or drawing. If he could drink, he would.

Dean looked over at Cas, glad he had the sunglasses so he wouldn’t know he was staring. He chewed his lip, met yet again with an awkward silence he didn’t know how to break. It seemed like every time he tried, things only got worse. 

Cas knew he was being stubborn, and he knew that if he wanted to bring about a pulse of normalcy back to their relationship, whatever the hell it was, the awkwardness needed to go. And words always made things worse.

Especially since anytime they spoke, Cas would feel himself turning into an idiot with a crush, mooning over Dean and wanting to learn more. He wanted to tell Dean how excited he was for Rome. To go see the Vatican, the art museums, poetry halls. Go see musicians play in the park and eat street food. But if he did, he wouldn't be able to stop. He wouldn't be able to stop falling for Dean. So he needed to step back, to stop talking to Dean. And the best way he knew how, was sex.

So he walked closer to Dean and tilted his chin down to Cas' level, pulling him in for a kiss. It was slow, waiting for Dean to respond to it.

Dean was surprised. Cas seemed far more likely to storm out the door in a huff or continue to pout and look away from him than to walk over and kiss him, but he wasn’t complaining. He scooted forward, gently cupping one of his cheeks as he slowly kissed him back. This was better, the kind of silence he preferred.

No talking. No thinking. Just...being. Cas got lost in it, his hands dropping to Dean's waist as he rubbed slow, purposeful circles down his hips, his tongue pressing against his bottom lip.

Dean felt that similar flush of heat he’d experienced back in the limo, his hands reaching up to lightly tug on Cas’ hair as he’d discovered how much Cas liked getting his hair pulled. His lips parted and his tongue ran over Cas’, his body breaking out in goosebumps.

A soft, involuntary moan slid from Cas' lips, and he pressed his body impossibly close to Dean’s. He ground a little against him, searching for silent answers as he slipped his fingers up to caress along Dean’s waistband.

Dean couldn’t help but smile a little against his lips. There was that moan he liked to pull from him each time. He untucked Cas’ shirt, sliding his hands up his muscular abdomen and chest as a moan fell from his own lips.

Cas slid one hand down the front of Dean’s boxers, wrapping his fingers around his length and moving slowly, rhythmically. Dean’s moan urged him further. He bit down on his bottom lip and tugged it out 

“Hnnng,” Dean groaned, pushing his hips forward as he unzipped Cas’ jacket and pulled it off his shoulders. His hands slid down to his belt, unbuckling it and sliding it through the loops. He practically devoured Cas’ mouth, tugging down the zipper of his pants and sliding his hand into the gap, brushing the back of his hand over his underwear.

Cas felt his body quiver, every nerve ending lit up with pleasure under the dizzying kiss. He reluctantly pulled his hand out of Dean’s boxers, stripping out of his jacket, shirt and pants, then toeing off his work boots. Now left in socks and briefs, he met Dean's lips once again, bruising them with the intensity of a deep kiss as his fingers pushed back down the rock star’s boxers.

Dean grimaced from the lack of touch, his eyes greedily running over Cas as he stripped, something he knew he was good at. He scooted against him, moaning into his mouth as he cupped his hand around his briefs, massaging him through the thin fabric before he slipped his hand beneath the waistband.

Cas’ fingers slid slowly over Dean's length, caressing and tracing its shape as he ground up into Dean's heated hand. He pulled back reluctantly, eyes lidded with lust. "You're not expecting anyone, right?" He asked, knowing no one from the security team was on this level.

Dean let out another satisfied groan, rocking his hips eagerly. “No,” he breathed out, his chest heaving a little. He wanted Cas so badly in that moment, and even the brief pause felt like torture to him.

"Good.” That meant Cas could be as loud as he wanted without fear of getting caught. "So how do you want it, Dean?" He asked, pressing open-mouthed kisses along his jawline as he ground against him some more, shuddering a little as he finally got some friction.

Dean leaned his head back, continuing to moan as he considered Cas’ question. “Mm, can you just keep grinding against me? I don’t want my ass to hurt if I’m gonna be sitting on a plane for a few hours.” He chuckled.

"Mhm." Cas answered, wrapping an arm around Dean's waist to pull him closer. He rolled his hips up against Dean’s, their cocks pushing together through the thin fabric. Cas whimpered a little against the edge of Deans jaw, his cock pre-leaking against the cotton.

“Oh, fuck...” Dean groaned, grabbing at the back of Cas’ neck and pulling him closer as he rolled his hips forward. He leaned his head back, his hand clasped firmly on the back of his neck as the other rested on his hip.

Cas pushed Dean back a little to get more leverage, hoisting him up on the nightstand and not minding the clatter of the lamp. They remained intertwined, almost like they would be if they were grinding in a nightclub. Cas pressed his forehead into Dean's shoulder, his movements becoming more erratic against Dean as he let out loud moans, unfiltered and unrestrained.

This was one of the hottest things Dean had ever done. He leaned back against the wall, pushing his chest against Cas’ and wrapping one leg around his waist. Hearing Cas moan like this without holding back was a treat and it made his cock twitch violently in his boxers. He knew it wouldn’t take much more, pressing his cheek against the side of Cas’ head and yanking roughly around his hair.

"Fuck, fuck-" he moaned, his body shaking. Cas knew he wouldn't last much longer either. He quivered, crying out as Dean ripped at his hair. He gave a few more hard, uneven thrusts before coming into his briefs against Dean.

Dean was close enough to be able to feel the warmth of Cas’ release pressed against him. He gripped him tightly, continuing to rock his hips as hearing his final moans pushed him over the edge. He came in his boxers, just like Cas wanted him to that last time. “Holy fuck,” he breathed.

Cas struggled to catch his breath, licking his full lips as he looked down at Dean’s boxers with a dizzy gaze. "Fuck that's hot." He panted.

“This what you wanted, Cas? Me to cream my boxers like a fucking teenager?” Dean chuckled, keeping himself wrapped around him so he didn’t fall over. His eyes trailed down Cas’ body and he smirked. “And you match.”

"Mm, very much so," he breathed out, his eyes on Dean’s face.

"Isn't it hot?" Cas added, his fingers trailing down his thighs slowly. He dropped to his knees in front of Dean, taking his time as he took the cum-soaked boxers between his lips and sucked.

“Extremely...” Dean trailed off, leaning his head back and letting out a soft moan. “Fuck...now that’s even hotter.” He gripped the edge of the nightstand, pushing his hips out as he felt the heat from Cas’ mouth against his spent cock.

Cas sucked for a little while, his fingers tracing along Dean's thighs, up and down slowly, the cum gathered on the ridges of his mouth as he pulled back to look up at Dean. "Hope that was okay." 

“Okay is an understatement.” Dean chuckled. He sucked in a breath when he saw the leftover cum on his lips and he nearly fell off the nightstand.

“You uh, got a little something...” He smirked, leaning in to kiss him.

Cas massaged Dean’s thighs slowly, kissing him back with a sense of eagerness. He flicked his tongue into Dean's mouth, pulling back just enough to nudge his nose against Dean’s.

Dean was completely breathless, his heart racing in his chest as he remained closed to Cas. This was it for him. He knew he liked Cas, and that was dangerous. He couldn’t fall for his security guard. So he’d handle it how he always handled his feelings, by ignoring them. His sunglasses had long fallen off by them and he’d hardly even noticed. Clearing his throat, he put his hands on Cas’ hips, smiling a little.

“You wanna quickly hop in the shower to clean up?” Dean asked. That wasn’t at all an excuse to get to see him naked and dripping wet again, totally not.

"Good idea." Cas stripped his underwear off and did his best to clean off the cum, tossing the briefs in the wastebasket. He stretched out, making his way to the bathroom and turning the taps on, climbing under almost immediately.

Dean chewed on his lip, not shy at all about letting his eyes wander down Cas’ body. He followed behind, discarding his boxers and joining him beneath the warm water. He let out a contented sigh, placing his hands on Cas’ hips.

“Kinda wish we could fuck on the plane so Lisa wouldn’t have to,” he murmured.

"Mm." Cas didn’t say anything further. For a second, he forgot. He forgot that he would have to spend the plane ride listening to Dean and Lisa. Instead, he closed his eyes and rinsed his body off. "Did you want lunch before you board?" He asked, switching back to work talk and stiffening a little.

Dean watched how the warm beads of water rolled down Cas’ perfectly toned chest and he bit his lip. He’d never felt gayer. It took him longer than normal to answer the question, distracted. “Oh. No, I uh...I can eat on the plane.”

Mm, it felt so nice. Cas tipped his head back, running his fingers through his own hair slowly and letting the water drip down over his body. He brushed his fingers down, rubbing off the cum from his stomach and thighs as he looked at Dean. "Can I have the bar of soap?"

“Uh...yeah.” God, this was better than porn. Dean couldn’t take his eyes off Cas, completely dazed. He reached over and grabbed the bar of soap, handing it to Cas. “You need any help?”

"Would you mind doing my back?" He asked, passing Dean the bar of soap and turning to face the wall. He placed his palms on the tile much like Dean had the day before and spread his legs a touch.

Dean wondered if Cas was doing this on purpose. He must’ve been. “Of course.” He cleared his throat, lathering his hands in soap, then setting the bar down. He slowly worked his hands down Cas’ back, starting at his shoulders.

Cas let out a pleased moan, relaxing into Dean's welcoming touch. "Feels good," He murmured.

“Yeah?” Dean smirked a little, gliding his hands down every inch of Cas’ back until he reached his ass. He gave extra attention to it, making sure he was thoroughly cleaned.

Cas grunted a little, rolling his shoulder back as Dean worked down his body further until his hands were cupping his ass. He straightened up and turned to face him.

"Thanks." He detached the shower head and rinsed down his very wet body, his fingers tracing along his own chest.

“Uh huh...” Dean took a step back, practically drooling. He couldn’t help himself. It was like he was watching a cologne commercial or something. Cas definitely had the looks of a celebrity, even if he wasn’t one.

Cas kept his eyes on Dean, curious. Why was he looking at him like that? Maybe he should spray him with cold water. Although it was flattering to have Dean practically drooling over him, so he decided to keep going, eat up the attention.

Dean hardly realized he’d been staring, lost in his own little fantasy world. His eyes were trailing all over Cas, drinking in the sight of his perfectly sculpted body. There was no denying his crush by that point, even if he wouldn’t admit it.

Cas tipped his head to the side, massaging his own neck with his hand as his eyes fell shut. He let out a low, breathy moan. He hadn't put on a show for someone in a while, but surely having Dean in a daze was a good sign.

Cas was doing this on purpose. Dean knew that now. He had to be. It was like he was doing everything in slow-motion, the way that movies portrayed a hot guy taking off his shirt or something. He stood back against the wall, enjoying the show and the moan he could practically feel between his legs.

"Would you mind washing my chest?" Cas asked, feigning total innocence as he peered at Dean with his piercing eyes through dark lashes.

“Uh, not at all.” Dean stepped forward, trying to collect himself as he lathered his hands up with soap again and pressed his hands against Cas’ chest, almost a little too eagerly rubbing the soap across his body.

Cas watched Dean carefully, his eyes tracing his movements. His blue eyes were boring into him, observing mostly

Dean took his time to admire Cas’ muscles, running his hands over every ridge and valley. He worked down to his abdomen, then across his hips, gently rubbing small circles into his skin with his thumbs.

"What are you thinking about?" Cas' voice was deep, low, as if he was demanding to hear Dean’s thoughts rather than asking. 

“Mm, not much. Just...thinking about how sexy you look right now.” Dean took another step closer to him, reaching a hand up to brush through his damp hair. “And if you know what you’re doing to me right now...”

"Tell me what I'm doing." He had an amused smile on his lips, head tilted just an inch back as Dean ran his fingers through his wet hair.

Dean sighed. “I don’t know how to explain it, Cas. But the way you’re looking at me...the way you’re running your hands over your body and the way you’re letting the water drip down you...fuck. It’s hot.”

He pulled Dean a little closer. "It's strange you find me so attractive. You meet so many models and yet, you are stricken by me showering." 

Dean reached out and gently cupped the side of his face, genuinely surprised by Cas’ statement. “You have no idea how gorgeous you are, do you? You could be a model if you wanted, Cas. You’re right up there with them.”

He felt a flush of embarrassment, opening his mouth and closing it again, speechless. "Ah, thanks," he breathed out, a smile tugging at the corner of his lips.

“I’m serious.” Dean joined his other hand so they framed his face and he tilted his head up a little to look at him. “You must know. I mean, you were a stripper. I’m sure people told you that all the time.”

"It's a little different, I mean..." It was Dean telling him. It was someone he had...feelings for. His heart was hammering in his chest, his ears thumping as he stared into his hypnotically green eyes.

“How’s it different?” Dean found it adorable how flustered Cas was becoming. There were so many different sides to him he seemed to be able to switch back and forth between so quickly.

"It's you,” he said softly. He didn't want to keep explaining himself, so he drew Dean in and kissed him, slow and passionate, taking Dean's hands and sliding them down his hips and resting them on his upper thigh.

“Oh.” Dean was still a little confused. As far as he was concerned, Cas couldn’t care less about Dean’s opinion of him, but maybe he was wrong. The kiss immediately shoved those thoughts away, his hands gently running up and down Cas’ thighs as he moaned softly against his lips.

"Mm..." Cas hummed in response to Dean's soft moan, his arms wrapping around his neck as he held onto him tightly, their bodies pressed together as Cas slowed the kiss down to a teasing pace, his tongue caressing Dean's lip as if tempting him.

Dean slid his hands around to gently cup his ass, squeezing at the firm muscle as he let out another moan. “Mmf, Cas,” he groaned, his voice taking on a pleading tone as he parted his lips. So much for a brief shower.

_ Fuck  _ that was hot---he wanted to fuck Dean senselessly, pin him against the wall and just have him buckled and screaming. But with Dean unwilling to bottom, he still craved that intimacy. He pulled back, his eyes trained on Dean.

"I want you to fuck me,” Cas said sincerely. He had never bottomed before, but he felt a sudden, overwhelming lust and wanted Dean as close as he could get him. And if that meant bending over for him, he would.

“Really?” Dean was surprised. He hadn’t thought Cas would ever let him top, and he was okay with that. “Are you sure? I mean, your ass is gonna be sitting on the same plane.” He of course was more than willing to do it, but he didn’t want Cas to regret it later.

"You don't want to see me shifting on the plane? Knowing your dick had me begging for more." He brushed their noses together slowly.

“Mm, sure I do.” Cas knew how to get to him, and it was an extremely tempting offer. “Have you ever been fucked before?” Dean asked softly, pressing a few slow, short kisses to his lips.

"No," he murmured, his gaze on Dean’s as he pressed their bodies together. "Do you want to be the first to stretch me wide open?"

“Hell yes.” Dean ran his thumb across Cas’ bottom lip, his other hand trailing down to wrap around his cock. “Here? Or you wanna go do this on the bed?”

Cas let out a pleased moan, pushing his hips up into Dean's hand. “Here. On the bed. On the floor. On the couch. Wherever you want me," he breathed out, his head falling back against the tiled wall as he eyed Dean.

“Wish I could say all of the above, but I don’t think we have time for that right now.” Dean chuckled, stroking him slowly. “Mm...what if I bent you over the sink?” His mind was running rampant with filthy scenarios.

Cas’ cock perked up at the idea and he nodded quickly in excitement. He growled, his fingers clawing a little at his hair. "Yes! Yes." He pressed his lips to Dean’s neck, licking along the skin.

Dean let out a breathy moan, tilting his head back as he reached over with his free hand and shut the water off. He grabbed the handle to the glass shower door and slid it open, stepping out carefully as he was walking backwards, keeping Cas plastered to his body. His heart raced in excitement. He wasn’t used to being dominant, but he loved it whenever he did get the chance.

Cas never, ever submitted to anyone. He was the dominant one. The one who made people beg and scream, but being submissive for Dean sounded like something he couldn't pass up. He bumped into the sink, climbing up on the porcelain and wrapping his legs around Dean’s waist

Dean kissed him hard, grabbing onto his thighs and holding them up. Grunting, he pulled back after a few moments of indulging himself, breathing heavily as he locked eyes with Cas.

“Get on your stomach. I’ll be right back.” He headed out of the bathroom, going as quickly as he could and ignoring the fact that he was still dripping wet.

Cas was panting and scrambling for Dean, to taste more of him, to feel him so as the rock star pulled away he let out a wanton noise.

He nodded breathlessly, climbing off the sink shakily and turning around, bending over on his stomach like instructed.

Dean returned in record time with a bottle of lube and a condom. He knelt down behind Cas, nipping at his ass and dragging his teeth slowly down one of his cheeks. “Mm...fuck. I love your ass.” He gave it a light tap, then parted his cheeks and flicked his tongue out over his hole.

Cas panted, his knuckles turning white as he gripped the side of the sink. He let out a moan as Dean licked along his ass, his forehead pressing into the glass. His legs were shaky. He’d never felt someone’s tongue that intimately before.

Dean gave a few more slow, long licks before pulling back. He could eat his ass properly another time. He coated a finger in lube, starting off very slow as he gently eased it inside of Cas, his other hand dropping to stroke his cock so he’d be more relaxed.

Cas’ breath was fogging the glass. He was grinding his teeth and clenching around the strange, intrusive feeling of his finger inside him. His thighs tightened, trying to focus instead on Dean jacking him off. 

“I know it feels a little weird at first, but it’ll feel good soon, I promise.” Dean slid his finger in up to the knuckle, then eased it out halfway before sliding it back in and twisting a little. Cas was so tight. He massaged the head of his cock as he prepared a second finger.

“Take a deep breath for me. If it hurts too much, let me know.” He gave the back of Cas’ thigh an affirming pat before he nudged his second finger in, moving slowly and taking his time.

Cas grunted, now understanding why his partners needed so much prepping before he fucked them. He prayed this was worth it, breathing out slowly, in and out, just like Dean’s fingers. "Im fine," He grunted.

Dean scissored his fingers, waiting until he had both knuckle deep before he coated a third in lube and eased it in. “Good, you’re doing great.” He thrusted all three slowly, going as deeply as he could.

The pain slowly curled into an interesting feeling of being stuffed full. His legs spread a little further and Cas leaned into it, soft moans pulling of from his lips. "I'm ready, I'm ready," he breathed out. 

“There we go.” Dean smirked a little, sliding his fingers out. He opened the condom and rolled it on, applying a generous amount of lube. He placed one hand on Cas’ hips and used the other to slowly guide himself inside of him, moving a little at a time until he was about halfway, his thumb lightly massaging into his hip bone. “How’s that feel?”

Cas was surprised how gentle Dean was. He felt a swell of appreciation and sudden affection. He tensed slightly as Dean pushed in but, it wasn't as bad as he was anticipating. He jutted his hips back slowly, letting Dean sink in the rest of the way.

“Fuck, you feel so good,” Dean grunted as he began to thrust, each one slow but deep so Cas could feel as much of him as possible. He was so shocked by Cas’ request to do this that he wanted to make sure he didn’t regret it, and that it was possible he’d be willing to do it again.

Cas was relaxing into it, his short gasps turning into moans as he lifted his palms from the sink and pressed them into the glass, "Yes, yes, Dean. Just like that," he breathed out, pushing back.

Dean smirked, beginning to move faster as he searched for the spot that’d make him explode, slightly changing up the angle each time he thrust in.

Cas sort of understood why people enjoyed bottoming but it wasn't that---“Fuck! Fuck,” Cas cried out, his vision exploding in white as he clawed his nails on the mirror, struggling to stay standing. "Dean--" Cas was loud, his moans unfiltered as his body shook.

He’d found it. And the moans Dean received were more than reward for his efforts. “Mm, I’ve got you.” He held his hips up a little, pressing himself against Cas to try and hold him steady as best he could. He knew this was a very precarious position and probably not the most comfortable for Cas, but it was spontaneous. He continued to thrust, harder and faster now that he’d gotten the hang of it, striking his prostate each time. 

The mirror became clouded by Cas’ breath, his blunt nails scratching at the counter and he drooled a little, his eyes falling to the mirror to watch Dean fuck him from behind, which admittedly, was the hottest thing he had ever seen.

Dean caught him staring in the mirror and winked at him, reaching forward and running his hands down his muscular back as he kept the quick, even pace with his thrusts, moaning loudly.

Cas felt his cheeks flush in embarrassment at getting caught and he swallowed thickly. While trying to focus, his mind wandered over to something he had seen in porn before and he suddenly had the urge to try it. His cock twitched with each hard thrust and he knew he was close, but he didn't want it to be over already.

"Stop, stop-" Cas panted out, trying to straighten himself up a little as he wiped the drool from his mouth.

“Huh? Okay.” Dean halted his thrusts, a little confused. “Everything alright, Cas?”

"Yes, yes, I want to try something. Lay on the floor." He pointed to the fluffy mat in front of the shower, then shakily stood up and brushed his fingers through his hair as he tried to catch his breath.

Dean nodded, his heart still racing as he lay back onto the bath mat, looking up at him expectantly. His eyes trailed hungrily over his body, his cock aching from being denied after being so close.

Cas straddled Dean's lap, pressing his palms into his chest. He hadn't ever done this before, but  _ fuck  _ did he have an urge to ride Dean just so he could watch his face when he comes. He slowly sat up and sank onto Dean's cock with a groan, starting off a little jagged as he tried to find the right angle and rhythm. 

“Oh, fuck!” Dean cried out, reaching forward to grab at Cas’ hips as he sank down onto him. His hands slid slowly up his body, nails raking down his chest as he urged him closer. His back arched a little as he met Cas for every thrust, his hips bucking.

Cas quickly got the hang of it, enjoying this much more as he fucked himself onto Dean. He leaned down, meeting his lips in a heated, intense kiss as he ground his cock against Dean's stomach.

Dean cried out again, louder this time and grasping desperately at Cas. Moans spilled out and into Cas’ mouth, his breath catching in his throat. A few more thrusts, Dean meeting Cas’ hips each time, and he came hard, his legs trembling.

As Dean came, it only took a few more strokes of himself before he spilled across Dean’s stomach. He cried out loud, panting heavily as he shakily rode out his high

Dean shifted, gazing down so he could watch a Cas coat his stomach. “Fuck,” he groaned, grabbing onto his hips again as he tried to catch his breath.

Cas leaned over Dean, pressing his palms into the bathroom mat. Their eyes met and his stomach clenched, heat flushing his body. "Wow..." 

“Mm...wow is right.” Dean was still panting, his eyes searching Cas’. “I uh, didn’t think you’d be into that, but I’m so glad you suggested it. Fuck...you gonna be okay on the plane?”

"Mm, me neither." He leaned down a little further and brushed his nose against Dean’s. "Maybe not, but perhaps it might bring you a secret joy to see me uncomfortable from this."

Dean let out a soft, contented sigh, nodding. “I think it will.” He chuckled, reaching up and gently stroking Cas’ face. “I guess that shower was kinda pointless.”

"For you maybe, but I can clean you with my tongue if you wish," he murmured, pressing his thighs against Dean’s rib cage gently.

“Yes, please.” Dean bit his lip, his eyes still wandering all over Cas. He was trying to process what had just happened, not fully able to believe it.

Cas slid him out slowly. He was in a trance, pleasure bound as he slipped down to lick along Dean’s stomach. He cleaned up the pool of cum, eyes trained on Dean’s face. He would overthink this later, but right now, he only wanted to draw pleasure from Dean.

Dean let out a soft grunt in satisfaction, holding onto Cas’ hair. “Mmf...god, it’s hot watching you do that.” He licked his lips, shifting slightly beneath him. “How do you feel?”

He finished, sitting up to look at Dean properly. "Fine, I suppose. I haven’t stood up nor tried to sit down just yet," Cas replied, his fingers slowly skimming over Dean’s thighs.

“Good point.” Dean smiled lazily. If he wasn’t lying on the floor, he could stay like that forever, he thought. “Mm...can we move over to the bed?”

"Mm, lets go." Cas climbed to his feet, wincing under the pain as he held his hands out for Dean to help him up.

Dean accepted his hands, wrapping an arm around Cas’ shoulder and heading out of the bathroom. He plopped down on the bed, holding his arms out.

Cas slid into Dean's embrace, pushing him down so they both lay flat, cuddled on the mattress. Cas was sore but satisfied, his body exhausted. "I wish we could stay here," he whispered against Dean’s heated skin.

“Yeah, that’d be nice.” Dean pressed his cheek into Cas’ shoulder. “But Rome will be nice too. We can fuck all over Europe, hm?” He smirked, reaching over and taking his hand, lacing their fingers together.

"That is true." Cas quirked a small smile, rolling over to look at Dean properly. "Might be nice." He squeezed Dean’s hand, feeling a sense of vulnerability he had never felt before.

“Mhm.” Dean pressed a kiss to Cas’ warm neck, right against his pulse. “How long until we have to go? I don’t feel like moving.”

Cas glanced over at the clock. "Still got about an hour." He murmured, letting his eyes fall closed. This was nice, intimate. No obligations, just...bliss.

“Good.” Dean smiled a little, the hand that wasn’t holding Cas’ tracing lazily along his chest. “I still can’t believe you let me fuck you. That was so fucking hot.”

Cas smirked a little. "Never thought I would ever let anyone fuck me, but I guess you are right, top and bottom are arbitrary." His free hand brushed down over Dean’s arm affectionately.

“Mm, I guess I’m just very special then.” He laughed again softly. “But yeah. I mean...it’s kinda boring if you only do one sex position all the time. And you can ‘be a top’ and still bottom sometimes. It doesn’t really mean anything.”

Cas half shrugged. "Never really done it with one person more than once, so it doesn't bother me all that much,” he replied, not looking at Dean.

Dean nodded. “Yeah, me too. I don’t really have sex with guys that often anyway. But I’ve done both depending on what the other person wants. Don’t really care either way.”

"Surely you have a preference; for having such a macho personality, you sure are a slut for getting fucked from behind," he teased a little, adjusting himself on the bed.

Dean rolled his eyes. “I like what feels good. And both feel good, in different ways. And this is gonna sound corny as fuck, so please forget what I’m about to say, but what turns me on the most is knowing my partner is enjoying themselves.”

"I feel the same way; it's not corny." He squeezed Dean's hand, brushing his fingers over the back of it. Considering he loved pleasing Dean. He loved it when he cried out in pleasure, squirming and pleading, his loud screams; it was all like music to him.

“Mm, good to know.” Dean let out a soft sigh, resuming his light kisses up the side of Cas’ neck. “Especially you. Knowing I can break through that tough, business-like exterior and make you fall apart...fuck.”

Cas felt a soft flush of warmth. He felt butterflies in his stomach and tried not to seem too phased by Dean's words, but he really was smitten. "You just push down all my buttons at once," he answered smoothly.

“That’s all I ever aim to do.” Dean chuckled, kissing up to his earlobe and lightly nibbling before transitioning over to his jaw.


	12. Dysfunction

"If you keep that up, we are never going to make it to your flight," Cas murmured, feeling a flush of new pleasure curling inside him.

“Now that’d be something impossible to explain.” Dean found himself laughing again, his fingers trailing over and lightly caressing Cas’ hips. “You want me to stop?”

"No," he breathed out, lifting his free hand to graze through Dean’s hair slowly, grabbing a chunk and clenching, then letting out a low moan. He could have stayed there forever, relishing in Dean’s touches and affection.

Dean couldn’t help but smile, continuing to trail kisses over Cas’ face until he reached his lips. Both hands slid up to cup his cheeks and he rolled partially on top of him, kissing him deeply.

Cas let out a very soft gasp, his fingers dropping to trace down Dean’s spine. He lifted his left knee up, loving the warmth. He ignored his racing heart, the kiss slow and something that would linger on his lips for a long time.

“Mm...” Dean hummed softly, pulling back momentarily to catch his breath. His eyes locked with Cas’ and he swore his heart skipped a beat. Ignoring it, he leaned down and captured his lips again.

It was lazy and slow, each kiss sweeter than the next. Cas feared he was going to get a rash from Dean’s stubble, but it would be so damn worth it.

Dean slowly pulled back, biting his lip as he met Cas’ eyes again. His heart was pounding and he was panting, just from kissing him. “Fuck, alright. I hate to say this, but we should get dressed before someone comes to warn us it’s almost time to go.”

Cas nodded but didn't initially make any attempt to move. He wanted to stay with Dean, spend all day fucking him and kissing him, laying in this state of bliss and affection. His eyes stayed locked with Dean’s for a moment, lost in a daze before he squeezed Dean's hips gently and slid him off.

"Good idea." He climbed out of bed and hisses, the pain hitting him again. _ Fuck _ , okay. He began pulling his clothes on, face scrunched a little.

Dean rolled onto his back, his eyes trailing over Cas as he watched him dress. He couldn’t help but feel a little guilty when he saw him wince in pain. But Cas had done the same to him a few times now. “I can let you borrow my neck pillow to sit on if you want,” he offered. “It helps.”

Reluctantly, Dean climbed out of bed and put his plane clothes back on, just a pair of leggings and the t-shirt with the sleeves chopped down to his ribcage.

"I should be okay." He smiled softly toward Dean, tucking his shirt back in and buckling his pants up. How was it that Dean looked hot in his plane attire? He gestured with his finger for the rock star to come closer as he smoothed out his hair.

“Alright.” Dean smiled at him and walked over. “Please don’t give me a boner. There’s no way to hide it when I wear this.” He gestured toward the thin, stretchy material of his leggings.

"Mm, tempting but I suppose I will try to behave." Cas smirked, sliding his fingers through the deep cut sides of Dean's shirt, and tracing his rib cage slowly as he dipped down to leave an open mouthed kiss on his neck.

Dean let out a soft sigh, placing his hands on Cas’ hips and tilting his head back. “Mm...that kinda tickles.” He inched a little closer, glad for the contact.

"The kiss or the touch?" Cas breathed against his neck, licking along his skin slowly and to the crux of his ear.

“Touch...mmm.” Dean pressed himself flush against Cas, shivering a little. This was becoming dangerous again. But he didn’t want to pull away.

"We should go," Cas murmured, pulling Dean closer and slipping his hands to lace behind his back as he nibbled on his earlobe.

“Fuck you,” Dean grumbled, squeezing Cas’ hips. He’d riled him up again, and definitely on purpose. “Once we get to the new hotel room, I’m gonna be all over you,” he warned, pulling himself back and turning to grab his suitcase.

"Mm, I'm alright with that." Cas smirked again, tapping Dean’s ass before pulling back to grab his own bag and slinging it over his shoulder. "Do you want me to carry that for you?" He offered, gesturing toward Dean’s suitcase.

“I’d say yes, but you don’t need any additional pains in the ass.” Dean laughed, poking his ass out playfully as Cas touched it. “I’ve got it.” He pulled it off the dresser and wheeled it to the door, pulling it open and heading to the elevator.

Cas rolled his eyes and followed him, smoothing out his hair and regaining his professional stance, drawing a few steps away from Dean.

Dean smirked at him once they were in the elevator. Watching Cas shift to professional mode...turned him on. But he behaved himself because now they risked someone seeing. He stepped out at the lobby and gave his luggage over to one of the handlers, letting himself be escorted into the limo.

Cas rolled his head back, cracking his neck and keeping his eyes forward. He was on the job and had to be professional. He did his usual scan when he stepped out of the elevator, following Dean to the limo. With a nod to the driver, he gestured for Dean to climb in and he followed suit, sitting opposite him. It was going to be a long ride, so he pulled out his iPod.

Dean slid into the seat, stretching out comfortably as he always did. His gaze shifted over to Cas and he smirked. “Whatcha listening to? You got any of my songs on there?”

"I told you I hadn't heard of you before so why would I?" Cas chuckled, scrolling through to settle on one of his favorites.  _ I Don't Want to Miss a Thing  _ by Aerosmith.

“I dunno. Thought maybe you could’ve added some.” Dean shrugged.

"Dean, I have an iPod and no laptop, no chance of adding anything." Cas shook his head, pulling out his notebook. “Come on, distract yourself, we are gonna be in here for over an hour.” 

“I don’t bring anything to distract myself with.” Dean pouted like a child, annoyed Cas had his headphones in. 

Cas raised his eyebrows at Dean. "You don't carry anything around to play with?" He asked, flipping to a free page. He was a bit hesitant, but he passed his pen and notebook to Dean, "Here."

“Uhh...no. Except what’s already attached to my body.” He smirked, accepting the notebook and pen from Cas. “Thanks.” He didn’t really draw, but it might be a good time to work on writing some lyrics, if Cas didn’t mind him tearing out pages when he was finished.

Cas clicked his tongue in disapproval, then leaned back against the leather seat, getting comfortable. He hadn’t slept well the night before, so he was going to try his best to catch some before he sat on the plane. His eyelids fell closed and he soon drifted into a light sleep.

Dean tapped the pen against the lined paper as he thought about what to write, leaving nothing on the paper but dotted specks of ink each time the tip met the notebook. When Cas fell asleep, he grew curious, wondering how he filled his notebook. He set the pen down and quietly flipped it to the beginning, finding some poems he didn’t bother to read, until his eyes fell upon a drawing of his face. It was pretty well done and he was surprised. What couldn’t Cas do?

That made him more interested in the poems and he flipped back again to read over them. They were all romantic, or depicted longing and he chewed his lip. Cas had said he’d never been in a relationship with anyone before. Could the poems be about him?

Cas had filled the book with pages of sketches; intertwined hands, eyes, poems and lyrics he had written. Romantic, somber, love and loss. Unrequited love and darkness. Sketches of people with no faces mostly, but there was one he’d drawn the night before from memory without even thinking, of Dean. It was almost like his whole heart was in that book, even if he didn't realize it himself.

Dean knew this was a huge violation of privacy and Cas would probably never forgive him if he found out Dean had gone through it. But he couldn’t help his overwhelming curiosity and wasn’t it Cas’ fault for giving him the notebook in the first place? Dean would never give Cas his personal notebook, if he had one. He was too disorganized; all his songs were written on napkins and those cheap hotel notepads and sometimes his own arms when he had nothing else. But it worked well enough.

Cas slept until they reached the airport and only noticed when the car pulled to a stop. He stirred awake, squinting as he peered at Dean and yawned. 

"Sorry," he muttered, not meaning to sleep the whole trip, as he tugged his earphones out.

“Hm? What’re you sorry for?” Dean quickly flipped to an empty page in the notebook. He’d spent the drive examining every single page and realized he’d written nothing of his own.

“I uh...feel asleep myself after a bit,” he lied, closing the notebook and handing it back to Cas with the pen between two blank pages. “Couldn’t think of anything to put in the notebook, so I just dozed off.”

"Oh, good." Cas smiled warmly and took the notebook, tucking it back inside his jacket. He then scooted out of the limo and pushed the door open, waiting for Dean to join him as he slung his backpack on.

Dean nodded, ignoring the slight twinge of guilt in the back of his mind. He knew he had a lot to think about, and was almost glad for the long plane ride so he could try. He stepped out beside Cas, knowing he needed to act natural or else Cas would catch on immediately. He was a singer, not an actor despite the few commercials he’d been in, but he could pull this off.

“How’s your ass?” He murmured.

Cas looked over to him, still in a cheerful mood. "Fine. Thanks. Now shut up." He chuckled, his eyes falling back on the plane. "Did you want me to sit up near you again or would you like your time alone to sleep?" He asked.

“Uhh...” Dean wasn’t sure how to answer that. He wanted Cas near him, but he also wanted to think about what he’d seen in the notebook. And he was sure Cas didn’t want to hear him with Lisa. His refusal to be his security guard during the parties was starting to make more sense now. “Don’t know if I’ll be able to sleep, but it’s up to you,” he finally replied, climbing up the steps and into the plane.

Cas nodded. Something was a little off with Dean; he seemed...quiet. A little reserved. It took Cas a second and he almost tripped up the stairs.  _ Oh shit- _ maybe Dean had seen his notebook? His blood ran cold and he contemplated throwing himself off the side of the plane to save the awkwardness, but maybe he was over thinking it too much? He sat down in the seat Dean usually insisted he sat in.

Dean took his seat, gratefully swallowing the Xanax placed there for him and he closed his eyes, leaning back as he waited for the rest of the team to settle into their seats. He glanced over at Cas, smiling a little. “You might wanna put those headphones back in.”

It took Cas a second to snap out of his trance, but when he did he was pushed back into reality. He looked at Dean in confusion for a second, before his eyes fell on Lisa and it clicked. A well of hurt washed over him, but his stoic expression gave nothing away as he pushed his earphones back in and his eyes closed, turning up the music until the volume hurt his ears.

As the plane started down the runway, Lisa drew the curtains around Dean’s seat and walked over to him, a smile on her face. “Hey there, handsome. Excited for Rome?”

“You bet.” He grinned as she dropped to her knees in front of him and he relaxed against the seat, closing his eyes. Involuntarily, his mind wandered back over to Cas’ journal, to the drawings and words he’d read, and this almost felt like...cheating. How could he do this with Cas right beside him? And he hoped Cas knew it was because the two of them couldn’t do anything on the plane. There were too many people around.

After a few minutes, Lisa pulled back and climbed onto his lap instead. “Something on your mind?” She asked, slowly unbuttoning her shirt.

“Huh? Oh, no. Just tired, I guess.”

“Okay.” She took his hands and placed them on her chest as she adjusted herself and began to ride him.

He let out a grunt, trying to focus on her, but he was too distracted, his mind wandering to the two of them earlier in the hotel room, and the guilt settled deeper into his stomach.

“Are you sure you’re alright, Dean?” She asked after a few more minutes of trying.

“I’m fine,” he insisted. “Can we switch places?”

“Sure.” She climbed off his lap and he got up, having her lay back against the seat and he got on top of her. He thought he could focus better this way, since he was the one in control now, but still, all he could think about was Cas.

A few more minutes and she gently eased him off of her. “Dean, this isn’t like you. Should I be worried?” She frowned a little, reaching up to stroke his cheek.

“No, no. I’m fine. I just...I’m gonna head to the bathroom for a minute.” He got up and re-dressed, walking down the aisle and into the bathroom.

Confused, Lisa fixed her clothes and peeked through the curtain at Cas, hoping maybe he’d know what was going on. “Hey.” She gently tapped his shoulder. “Sorry to bother you. Castiel, right? But did anything happen that might’ve upset Dean recently?”

Cas was lost in his own world, almost asleep when he felt someone tap his shoulder. He jumped a little and pulled out his earphones, turning to see Lisa. He looked over at her in disdain, although he knew it wasn't her fault. He took a moment before answering, "not that I know of. Although I am just his security guard, so he wouldn't tell me if he did."

“Okay. I’m just, a little concerned. I know he has anxiety about flying, but we’ve never had this problem before. I know you probably don’t want to hear about this, so I won’t get into detail, but he seems...distracted today. I thought I’d let you know so you can keep an eye on him. He’s in the bathroom right now, but I don’t really know what to do. If I can’t keep him relaxed on the plane, he’ll have a panic attack.”

"So? You couldn't get him off. Maybe he is bored of you," Cas snapped, now annoyed. It took Cas another second and despite his annoyance, he remembered how Dean was at the concert when he panicked. He stood up and brushed past her, making his way to the bathroom. It was only a few steps away. He knocked on the door. "Dean?"

That stung a little, but Lisa brushed it off. She wondered why Cas was so irritable, though. Wasn’t it his job to keep Dean safe? She got up and walked to the kitchen area of the plane, making Dean a drink. Maybe that would help.

“Can’t a guy take a piss in peace?” Dean grumbled, though that wasn’t why he was in the bathroom. He slowly cracked the door open and looked at Cas. “What?”

"Oh good, you aren't dead," Cas said flatly, "Lisa was worried you would be sobbing in the bathroom. What, couldn't get it up for the flight attendant?" He asked, rolling up his earphones. "Seems you hurt her feelings."

“Shut up.” Dean groaned, crossing his arms and leaning back against the wall of the bathroom. “I’m just tired. I had a party last night...” he lowered his voice. “...and sex with you all morning. Did I really hurt her feelings?” That made him feel even worse. This wasn’t her fault. But he couldn’t tell Cas that, let alone her.

Cas half shrugged "My job is to make sure you don't have a panic attack or overdose in the bathroom. I’m just your security guard." Cas unwound his headphones again, prepared to leave. 

Cas’ coldness to him was off-putting. And maybe that was part of the problem. There was never a medium moment with him. All his time spent with Cas was either pure bliss or torture with no in between. And he didn’t know if he could continue to live like that. But what was he supposed to do? After all, Cas was right. He was just his security guard.

Dean wasn’t known for being particularly intelligent, especially when it came to emotional intelligence, but it suddenly dawned on him. Cas wasn’t acting cold because he wanted to be an asshole to Dean or because he was just doing his job. He was jealous. And Dean had known that before. That was where the guilt came from. But he hadn’t truly acknowledged it.

“Cas,” he said after a moment, keeping his voice low so no one else heard. “I need a distraction while I’m on airplanes and I’ve tried a lot of things. Knocking myself out with medication, watching movies, listening to music, eating, talking to people...you name it. The only thing that works for me is sex. And now that’s not working either and I...” he found himself choking on his words. “I don’t know what to do.”

Cas was surprised, considering Dean was about as open with his emotions as a padlocked box. So the fact he was displaying his feelings so blatantly was..different. But he knew panic attacks were oncoming and hard to handle, so he had to be gentle. 

Cas immediately softened. "I'm sorry, Dean. I was being rude. Look, I know plane rides for you are stressful. But if Lisa-" it took him a second to swallow the jealousy enough for him to finish his sentence, "...helps you, why does finishing matter? You can touch her without finishing, and it should keep you distracted."

Dean nodded. Being able to finish wasn’t the problem. It was the guilt of being intimate with someone else. But again, he couldn’t tell Cas that. “You’re right. I just don’t wanna make her feel like she can’t get me off or something. I mean...it doesn’t matter. She’s not my girlfriend. She works for me. But uh...sex with people who work for you gets complicated. Feelings get in the way sometimes. And I...don’t want to hurt her. Because I care about her. A lot.” He met Cas’ eyes for a moment as he made that last statement, swallowed hard, then glanced down at the floor. 

“I’m gonna go before anyone gets suspicious. Thank you.” He gave Cas’ shoulder a light squeeze, then left the bathroom, going back to his seat to find Lisa waiting with some cocktail recipe she’d invented.

Feelings get in the way. Because Dean cares for her. Of course he did. She was pretty. Just his time. Hell, she was a flying sex angel for him. And Cas was just convenient. He didn't say anything, just dropped his eyes to the floor. He didn't bother going back to his seat; he had some stuff to work through, so instead he stayed in the bathroom.

Dean took a sip of the drink she made and smiled. “I like it.” He set it in the cup holder. “I wanna try again. But something different this time? I want to pleasure you instead.”

“Oh. Okay.” Lisa was surprised by that suggestion, but wouldn’t complain. “Whatever you want, Dean. I’m here to serve you.”

That’s what Cas always said. An ache settled into his chest and he bit down on his lip, tugging the curtains closed again as he lay her back against the seat and slid his hand up her skirt.

Cas didn't return to his seat at all. He felt a sense of numb anger. At Dean. At himself. Why did he let himself fall for Dean? Even a little bit? He was his boss. It was totally unprofessional. And he let himself get hurt. By opening up and being vulnerable. He knew this was something he couldn't keep doing. He couldn't keep letting Dean touch him; he couldn't keep pretending he was fine with being used like this. Hell, he’d let Dean be the first person to fuck him. He felt like an idiot for seeing more in him than what was on the surface.

He washed his face in the sink and sat up the back next to Meg. She didn't say anything; she could tell he wasn't in the mood for it. So instead, she just took his hand and squeezed.

Dean noticed Cas didn’t come back to his seat and he chewed his lip harder, the guilt starting to resurface. This wasn’t going to work, and the only way to fix it was to tell Cas the truth. But he wasn’t sure he could do it. He still wasn’t sure what this was. Feelings...were so confusing to him and he needed more time, but he was only distancing himself further and further from Cas in the process.

Cas fell asleep again, feeling sick. He drifted in and out, speaking to Meg in his moments of consciousness. They decided he needed rest once they landed, so she was going to cover the show that night. She didn't mind, especially if that meant grinding down at Deans nerves a little for fun.

As the plane ride dragged on, Cas was finally awake enough to talk to Meg. She was a good distraction from the day, talking to him about how excited she was for Rome and that she couldn't wait to show him a museum on their shared day off. Was she asking him out on a date? He couldn't tell. But as long as it was a distraction from Dean, he didn't care and agreed.

Meg pushed an earphone in his ear, showing him some show he had never seen from the nineties. He was a little confused and she teased him about it, making him smile a little. He was quick to catch onto what was happening and eventually relaxed into it, hoping it would help time pass so he could get his ass off this damn flight.

Dean sighed and pulled back from Lisa. He had her get up and sit beside him. “Look...this...isn’t working. But it’s not your fault. I don’t want you to think that. I...” he chewed his lip again. It’d be good to get this off his chest, and he knew Lisa wouldn’t tell anyone.

“Cas and I have been sleeping together. And it’s been...tricky. I snooped and read his journal today and found out he has feelings for me beyond this arrangement we have. And I felt horrible about sitting here having sex with you while knowing he likes me. I don’t know what to do. I’m pretty sure I might have feelings for him...but I’ve never really experienced this kinda thing before. So I don’t know how to tell.”

Lisa just looked at him and laughed, relieved to say the least. “Oh my god. Dean, you’re such an idiot. If you think you like him, then you probably do. Just...talk to him. It’s not that difficult.”

“Yeah...but, could this really work? I mean, he’s my security guard. And after the tour, he’s leaving.”

“He’s leaving because he has no reason to stay. Give him one. And after the tour, he won’t be your security guard anymore. So won’t that solve the issue? He can just come along as your boyfriend.”

“Boyfriend?” The word made Dean’s stomach twist into a knot. “Uh...I don’t know if he’d want that.”

Lisa sighed. “You’re useless. You’ll never get what you want if you don’t go after it. I’m sure this industry has taught you that lesson over and over again. You care about him, Dean. I just heard about this situation a few seconds ago and I can tell. The fact that you feel guilty about having sex with me?” She poked his chest. “There’s a heart in there. I knew there was. And wouldn’t it be nice if Cas could be your mile high club partner? Not that I don’t enjoy the title, but you’d be happier with him.”

“I guess you’re right...but how do I tell him?”

“That’s up to you. You’re good with words, Dean. Use them.”

“Thank you for listening to this. I just...didn’t want you to think you were doing anything wrong. You’re always amazing.”

Lisa smiled. “You’re such a sweetheart. Cas is gonna be a lucky guy, you know? I’m rooting for you.” She kissed his cheek and got up. “Finish your drink.”

Dean did as told, using the rest of the flight to formulate some kind of plan for telling Cas how he felt. This succeeded in distracting him enough and before he knew it, they’d landed in Rome.


	13. Breathe

Having landed in Rome and Cas being sick, Jo was in a much better mood as she ushered the security off. Cas went with the others to the hotel as Jo peeked her head around Dean's curtain.

"Hey, uh, bit of a security change; Meg will be accompanying you for today. Good luck at the concert. I will see you there." She didn't even wait for him to respond before fleeing from the plane. 

The cocky, leather-bound blonde sidled up to Dean, a permanent smirk on her face. "Well, well, well. I'm your new bodyguard for today; try to contain your excitement."

Dean wasn’t surprised to hear Cas had bailed. It only encouraged him to carry out his plan. But did the punishment have to be dealing with Meg all day? He’d rather have Jo, and that was saying something.

“Awesome,” he replied. “I guess you gotta get in the limo with me then.” Since that had become his new tradition.

"If you insist. Everyone else already left anyway. But I already bagged the room next to Castiel, so I'm in no rush," she said, pushing her hands into her pockets. "After you." She gestured toward the exit.

Dean rolled his eyes. “Yeah, good luck with that. You know he’s gay, right?” He headed off the plane and out to the awaiting limo. He’d been looking forward to spending the day in Rome with Cas, preferably naked, but it looked like that wasn’t going to happen.

"When I'm done with him he will be at least bi. Trust me.” She grinned. "Gorgeous piece of ass, been looking forward to tapping that since Paris." 

“Gross.” Dean stretched out across the seat, looking over at her. “You can get in trouble for that, you know. Better hope no one reports you for fucking a co-worker.” He physically felt a little ill at the idea of Cas and Meg together. He hoped Cas had more sense than that.

"Co-workers fuck all the time. As long as we dont bang our employers," she answered, pulling out her phone.

“As long as you don’t get caught,” Dean corrected, looking at her with pure disdain.

"Plus, I have a date with him on Thursday, so maybe he isn’t as gay as you hoped." Meg smirked, ignoring his reply. 

“Is he aware that it’s a date? Or did you just invite him to go somewhere with you?” Not that he cared. He just wanted to get that stupid smirk off her face.

“Why do you care?" She asked pointedly. "Date, outing, same thing." She crossed her arms, leaning back against the limo seat. "Are you jealous? Does someone have a crush on their security guard? Or are you just territorial?"

Dean scoffed, crossing his arms in imitation. “I don’t care. I just don’t want you going around saying shit that isn’t true. You two can do whatever the fuck you want. I’m no snitch. I just don’t like rumors and lying. That’s what can ruin this team and I kinda need that not to happen.”

Meg’s smirk stayed in place but she didn't say anything, her eyes falling out the window.

Dean ignored her the rest of the way to the hotel room, perfectly content to sit in his bed all day and pout like a whiny child. He missed Cas, already.

Meanwhile, Cas had barely dragged himself to his bedroom, pushing the door open and collapsing on the bed. He slid his shoes off and wriggled, shedding his clothes down to his boxers before caccooning underneath nice and snug. He felt sleep overcome him quickly and soon, he was out.

Dean was brought up to his room on the top floor, met with yet another luxurious suite. But this time, it had a jacuzzi on the balcony. So maybe he could sit and pout in there instead of his bed. But again, it wasn’t the same without Cas. Once his suitcase was brought to his room, he took out a pair of swim shorts and changed into them, stepping out to the balcony and climbing in the hot tub.

Meg followed behind obediently, quiet for once as she did her job. Reaching the room, she stayed by the door and let him flounce off and do as he pleased.

If it was Jo or Cas, he would’ve invited them to join him. He knew Jo would decline his offer and Cas would accept. It had become a bit of a game with him to see which of his security guards would bend which rules. But he wasn’t going to ask Meg. His guess was that she’d say no because she didn’t want to be in a tub with him, not because it was against the rules. He sat back, turning on the bubbles and staring at her. At least if he was going to be miserable, he’d do it in style.

"Keep staring at me like that Winchester and I would say you wanna bang me," she told him without blinking. She liked pushing boundaries just for giggles, especially if it meant she could annoy him just a little.

“I have zero standards, but I still wouldn’t bang you,” Dean shot back. He closed his eyes instead, stretching out his arms and letting them rest across either edge of the tub.

"Well that's rude," She muttered, leaning back against the wall as she pulled out her phone to message Cas, but finding no response.

“Do you want me to want to bang you?” Dean asked, confused. This was a weird conversation.

She lifted her gaze and pulled a face. "I would rather fuck myself with barbed wire. Thanks.”

“Talk about rude,” Dean grumbled. 

He was such a weird dude. "You this awkward with everyone or am I a special case?"

“You’re the one making it awkward, sweetheart. I’m just sitting here.” He drummed his fingers along the edges of the tub, eyes still closed.

"Dear god," She muttered to herself, praying he would let her off early so she could vanish from the painfully weird situation. She didn't need to see him marinating in the hot tub.

“Look, I don’t want you to be here as much as you don’t want to be here, but apparently I have to be babysat at all times because I can’t be alone in a hotel room during the day. It makes no fucking sense. But whatever.” Dean sighed.

"You can dismiss me early, dumbass. The reason the security guards stay with you even in your hotel room is because you haven't given them the okay to leave." She rolled her eyes. "You are in charge."

“Huh. Well I’ve told Jo to go before and she said she had to stay. So...this is news to me. But fine. You’re dismissed.”

"Because she is hoping you would fall in love with her. It's so sad." She shrugged. "See ya." She waved her hand and exited the room.

“What the fuck?” Dean sighed. He couldn’t let Meg get into his head. That was what she wanted. But Cas and Jo and all this...it was too confusing.

Dean’s phone buzzed and he groaned, not wanting to leave the tub. But maybe it was from Cas. So he grabbed a towel and stepped out, going over to his phone. It was a video message from an unknown number, sent in a group text to him and Jo. Curious, he hit play. The lights in the room were dark, and it wasn’t easy to make out at first, so he turned up the brightness on his screen and squinted. As soon as the picture came into focus, he felt like he was going to throw up. He immediately recognized the room as the hotel he’d just left in Paris. And the two figures rolling around on the bed were unmistakably Cas and himself. But how was this possible? He had security in place to make sure no one could sneak a camera into his room. From the angle, it looked like the camera had been mounted onto the ceiling or somewhere high up on the wall on the opposite side of the room from his bed. It was no amateur job. 

***

Jo was in her room, hair let down and was about to take a bath when her phone buzzed. She lifted it, opening it from the unknown number. She played it, brows furrowed as it took her second to work out what was going on.

An immediate well of rage boiling up inside her, she quickly called Dean. 

He was glad Meg had left, to say the least. This was his worst nightmare come true. Maybe someone had snuck a camera in during the party? He couldn’t think of any other way. His phone rang and he nearly dropped it, his heart racing. 

He paced back and forth across his hotel room, his hands shaking uncontrollably as he slowly raised the phone to his ear. The walls felt like they were going to suffocate him and this war far worse than any airplane panic attack. He needed Cas more than anything in that moment and the additional fear that he’d never see him again started to seep in.

“Uh...h-hi, Jo,” he answered, his voice broken and trembling. He could hardly hold himself together.

"You got it too." She sighed. "Conference room downstairs in ten. Bring your boy toy." And just like that, the call ended.

“Fuck!” Dean threw his phone at the wall after she hung up, his eyes stinging with tears. He didn’t know what to do. Cas hadn’t been sent the message, so he had no idea what was going on. He quickly scrambled over to retrieve his phone, glad it hadn’t sustained more than a shallow crack along the screen, and it still worked fine. He called Cas, praying he’d pick up.

Cas lazily rolled over and answered his phone. "Dean, I'm sorry. I really am not feeling well...." 

“This is an emergency, Cas. Uh...Jo needs to meet with us in ten minutes.” Dean still felt sick to his stomach and he was scrambling to get out of his bathing suit and into real clothes as he spoke with his phone between his ear and shoulder. “Someone...took a video of us. In the hotel room in Paris. And uh...sent it to me. And Jo. I don’t know how the fuck it happened, Cas.” Tears stung his eyes and each word he spoke choked him. 

Cas felt his stomach drop and he was immediately on edge; a flush of horror chilling him down to the bone. How? How did that happen? He scrambled out of his bed and pulled his clothes on. "Wait there." He hung up and ran up to the elevators, jabbing at the button. He impatiently walked around, jumping in the elevator and barrelling out of it to Dean's room. He banged on the door, calling out Dean’s name, his heart racing in a state of pure panic

Dean flung the door open, looking like he was on the verge of collapsing. He quickly shut it behind him, his eyes wild. “Cas...I-I don’t know what to do. You’re gonna get fired and-and I...” his voice broke. “I can’t lose you.” That last part came out hardly above a whisper. It was a war with his throat to get the words out and his brain could barely string together a sentence. 

"Dean. Okay, stop. Breathe." He took Dean's face in his hands. He knew his job was fucked, there was no repairing what he did. But he could calm Dean down. Bring him back to earth. He met his eyeline. "Breathe."

“I don’t know how the fuck this happened, Cas!” Dean placed his hands on his shoulders, trying to breathe as he was told. In and out. In and out. His throat loosened and the ache in his sinuses subsided a little as he looked into Cas’ eyes, an ocean of reassurance and calm. “Maybe I can convince Jo. I dunno. As long as it doesn’t leak anywhere else...fuck.”

"Look. What's done is done. You can't change that. Did you just get the video or was there a message attached?" He asked softly.

“It was just the video...from some random number. I don’t know, Cas. This could get on the internet and it could ruin my whole career.” Dean was still trying to breathe, getting himself worked up all over again. “We have to go meet Jo.”

"Look. It hasn't leaked. I don’t have any messages on my phone. But right now, Jo is the last priority. You need to breathe, and just....be here with me for a second, alright? Your mental health comes first."

“My mental health.” Dean snorted, nearly hysterical by that point. “It’s over, Cas. We’re fucked. I told you...I can’t lose you. You’re the best damn security guard I’ve ever had and...I...” he trailed off, unable to say anything else.

Cas couldn't get him to shut up and breathe, so he did the only thing he could think of and kissed him softly, trying to ground him. 

Dean latched onto him, wrapping his arms around his neck and kissing him like it was the last time he’d ever do it, because he was afraid it might be. His heart still racing, he pulled back when his lungs screamed for air and his eyes met Cas’ again.

“Thank you. Okay...uh, let’s go.”

Cas was taken aback, the breath knocked out of him. This day was a rollercoaster of emotions. He pulled back to catch his breath. "Lead the way."

Dean wanted to hold his hand as he walked out of the room, but decided that wasn’t a good idea. If there was any time to remain professional, it was now. He headed into the elevator, steeling himself. “Tell me it’s gonna be okay, Cas. Please.”

Cas smiled a little and squeezed his shoulder. “It will be okay." 

***

When they reached the lobby and stepped out, they were greeted by a rather steely Jo. "Castiel. Alone. First." She pointed to the conference room. He knew how this was going to go, and he knew he wouldn't see Dean again. So he didn’t look at him, simply slipping past.

Dean nodded, taking a seat on one of the plush couches outside. He could hear his blood roaring in his ears, but he hung onto Cas’ words, that it would be okay, and he kept repeating it over and over in his head until he believed it. After all, what had they truly done wrong here? Loved each other? Did he love Cas? No. It was too soon to think that. But he thought that he could someday, if ever given the chance.

She spoke low and dangerous, mostly to make sure Dean couldn't hear. She spoke about how he had ruined Dean's career and his own, that he would never work in this industry again, how he was just Dean's boy toy and he would get bored of him soon. The slams came one after the other, the taunts rolling in Cas' mind. 

"You are fired. Go. And if you even look at Dean on your way out, I will tell everyone what you have done. Understand?"

Cas numbly stood up, his mind foggy and dizzy. He wanted to cry; he had been so stupid and reckless to believe that this arrangement with Dean could’ve worked out. He steeled himself and turned on his heel, leaving the conference room and making a point not to look at Dean as he got in the elevator to go pack his stuff.

Jo stepped out, her attitude shifting to something soft and concerned. "Come in, Dean."

Dean’s heart sank when he saw Cas leave the room. He didn’t have to ask to know it was over. So this is what it felt like, getting your heart broken, losing someone you care about. It was an ache deep in his chest, a heavy, empty feeling that made him drag his feet as he stood and walked into the room, taking a seat in a chair in front of a large wooden table.

"I know this is scary for you, but rest assured we will have this sorted." She shut the door gently. "We won't let this slip-up ruin your career, so don't you worry. And it appears it hasn't been linked to the press." 

“So what? Cas takes the fall for this and gets fired and you’re just gonna sweep it under the rug?” Dean really didn’t want to be having this conversation. Yes, he was terrified about this getting out, but losing Cas was somehow worse.

"Yes. He is your security guard. His job is to protect you. And he failed," she replied plainly.

“He didn’t fail, Jo. If you wanna talk about failure, how about the girl that attacked me last show? How well did you handle that? And Cas, who wasn’t even assigned to me that night, found me in the bathroom and convinced me to go back onstage and finish the show when all I wanted to do was run. None of the other fucking security guards could do that for me. You can’t fire him. Please, Jo.”

"He's a security liability. If he is distracted on duty, you could get seriously hurt, and I'm not risking that so you can keep your boy toy. Sorry, Dean. I'm not changing my mind on this."

“He’s not...my boy toy.” Dean sighed, drumming his fingers on the table as he tried to think of a possible solution. “So who’s gonna take over for him? Please don’t say Meg. She’s the fucking worst.”

"Apologies." She bobbed her head, glad he’d finally dropped it. With some luck, she would be able to shake him completely. "David. Or me. Whoever you prefer." Her options were limited until they got back to the states.

“You’re really gonna volunteer yourself after what happened at the concert? You’re over the little meltdown you had now?” Dean chewed on his lip. “Fine. I’ll take you. But I’ve got one condition. Don’t fire Cas completely. You can take him off as my security guard, but he already flew all the way here. So can you get him a job in one of the lower tiers?”

"Look, it's not ideal, Dean. But we are limited on staff till we get back to the states. And we don't want rumors to spread and we are short-" she sighed, contemplating for a moment. Maybe she would just have to keep crushing Cas and hope he’d leave of his own accord.

“Exactly. You’re limited on staff, so why get rid of one? Please, Jo. This isn’t easy on me either, you know. But I know you didn’t like Cas, so I’m sure this news is great for you. Congratulations.” Dean glanced down at his hands, his fingers continuing to tap at the wooden table. “I’d owe you one,” he added after a moment, hoping to sweeten the deal.

Jo let out a soft sigh; she couldn't ever say no to Dean. Just look at him; he was like a soft, dough-eyed puppy. And he was desperate. Whether it be fear or something else, she couldn't tell. "Fine. Fine."

“Thank you.” Dean got up and pushed the chair in. “Do you think you could trace the number that sent the video? I wanna figure out who did this. Can’t exactly go to the cops about it, but I want to know.”

"Of course, Dean. I will do what I can." 

“Uh huh.” Dean would do some investigating of his own later. After all, it was pretty easy to find phone numbers on the internet. “If we’re done here, I’m going back to my hot tub. But I guess you  _ have _ to come with me, right? For my safety?”

"Yeah. I mean, yes of course." She scrambled to her feet and shot him a bright smile, fixing her hair up a little. She followed him, probably a little more eager than she should be.

Dean walked to the elevators, shaking his head. He was sure Cas would know what to do. But he didn’t think he’d be able to get in touch with him, so he was on his own this time. When he got back to his room, he changed back into his bathing suit and grabbed his phone, climbing back into the balcony jacuzzi.

Jo stood by the door, mostly keeping her eyes averted, but they would occasionally fall onto the half naked Dean with lustful intent.

Dean opened up the message, typing the phone number into the White Pages online. A name came up, to Dean’s surprise. He’d thought this would be much more difficult, that the number would be better encrypted. But no. It belonged to a Bradford Daniels. From London. Smirking a little to himself, he texted the number.

_ Hello, Brad. You wanna start by telling me how the fuck you got a camera into my hotel room? The damage is already done. Game over. _

_ *** _

Cas didn't know how he’d ended up here. Drinking with Meg in a bar. But he needed it. Finding that Dean had feelings for Lisa, having a video of him and Dean sent to Jo, and getting fired was a lot to take. And the more he drank, the more he spilled; he cried a little, the drinks getting heavier and his mind becoming more and more clouded.

Cas barely made it back to the hotel before he completely blacked out. Six whiskey shots and countless beers had him puking and then after that, nothing.

***

Brad had received a reply and was surprised, not expecting any further trouble. How the hell did Dean know who he was? He replied,  _ Mum’s the word. _

_ Cut the bullshit. I’ve already found your name. Do you wanna find out what else I can find on you? Or are you gonna tell me the truth? _

Dean looked up at Jo. “Hey, could you fetch me a beer?”

_ Find out whatever you want. No $$$ and I'm not talking. _

Jo nodded and opened the mini fridge, taking a beer out from one of the shelves. Her expression was soft as she popped the cap off and handed it to him.

“Thank you.” Dean took a sip, then set it on the edge of the tub. He glanced down at his phone and rolled his eyes. He wasn’t surprised. But money was something he had plenty of, fortunately.

_ Fine. How much do you want? _

_ $10,000. I'm sure that's nothing to you. Moonridge bar at 10pm. Come alone. _

Dean snorted. This was incredibly shady and he didn’t exactly carry that much money around with him, but he could figure something out. Now the question was how to get away without a security guard.

_ Fine. Don’t be late. _

Dean set his phone down and picked his beer back up, taking a few more sips. His eyes trailed over to Jo and he contemplated whether he should tell her about this or not, then ultimately decided against it. She’d never let him leave alone. So he’d have to sneak out.

Jo felt her stomach clench as he looked at her, giving him a warm smile as she played with her hair. How could he even look at Cas when she was clearly so much prettier?

This was better than Meg. At least Jo liked him, a little too much. But she could never be Cas. Once he finished his beer, he climbed out of the tub and wrapped a towel around his waist, heading back into the room and closing the glass screen door.

“Hey, I’m gonna take a shower...so I guess you can go.”

"You don't want me to organize your dinner? Or help you with anything?" She was way too eager to please, but she wouldn't fight him further if he said to go.

“I’m not all that hungry. It’s been a long day, Jo. I think I’m just gonna shower and call it a night. Maybe watch some TV until I fall asleep. You don’t need to be here for that.”

"Alright. Just call me if you need me,” she replied with a nod, turning around and making her way out of his hotel room and back to hers. With some luck, she would have him all to herself in no time.

“Will do.” As soon as she left, Dean hung up his wet bathing suit to dry and climbed into the shower, formulating a plan for the evening. He’d transfer some money from his bank account and go to an ATM, then a currency exchange if he couldn’t get the money in American dollars. It was difficult to think that only this morning, he was showering with Cas, and now he had to do it alone.


	14. The Truth

When Cas woke up, it was around 9pm. His head was spinning and he felt vomit pooling up inside him. He fled to the closest bathroom and threw up the empty contents of his stomach. He clung to the bowl, praying for death.

Dean climbed out of the shower and got dressed, putting on a pair of black jeans and a black hoodie, his ‘sneaking around outfit’ . He put on his sunglasses as well and slid his phone into his pocket. There was an ATM across the street from the hotel and he left through the back stairwell so he wasn’t seen. Walking over and reading the instructions, he groaned. He could only withdraw €250 a day. And the banks were all closed by then. Shaking his head, he went to the bar anyway, hoping to explain the situation. 

Brad showed up, making no effort to conceal himself at all. But he could spot Dean, and with a smug smile, he slid into the booth opposing the rock star.

Dean removed his sunglasses, meeting Brad’s eyes. “Oh, you’ve gotta be fucking kidding me. It’s you?” He recognized the man from his London party. 

"Well who did you think it was, honey?" Brad smirked. 

Sighing, he fished the €250 out of his pocket and slid it over to him. “Look, this is all I can get at the moment. It’s 10 o’clock at night and nothing’s open. I can get to a bank tomorrow, but this is what you’re gonna get for now. So start talking.” 

Brad wasn’t happy about it, but he knew that Dean’s hands were tied. So he accepted. “Fine. What would you like to know?” 

“Let’s see here...why the fuck did you put a camera in my hotel room? How did you even manage to do it? Why are you following me around Europe? And why are you trying to blackmail me?”

"Because I was asked to. I work for a security company. I was paid better than my normal salary, and hell, getting into your room when I already had an access key was easy." He shrugged a little.

Dean’s eyes narrowed. “Who paid you? And why?”

"That blonde on your security. Uh, Jo something? And I don't know why. I just did what I was asked, and got paid." 

Dean clenched his fists. Of course Jo was behind this. His blood was boiling. “Are there cameras in my room now? Do you have access to it?”

"No. I did my job in Paris. But I have free tickets and passes here in Rome so I thought I would go with some friends.”

“How much is Jo paying you?” An idea began to form in Dean’s mind. If she wanted to play dirty, he’d do the same. “I’ll pay you double to come back with me and install a camera in my room.” 

"Pay me another 5 and you got yourself a deal." He grinned. He was happy to oblige, hell, this was the most fun he’d had in ages.

“I’ll pay you when it’s done.” Dean handed him his room key. “I’ve gotta go see if I can figure out this bank situation, but I’ll meet you there.” He got up, putting his hood and sunglasses back on.

"Alright. Sounds like a plan." Brad got up from the booth and made a beeline for a cab. He snooped around for a bit once he arrived at Dean’s room, but finding nothing interesting, he just set up the cameras.

Dean stayed back at the bar and made a few phone calls, drumming his fingernails impatiently on the table. Luckily, it was only 1PM back in LA, so he got ahold of his bank quickly to explain the situation so his card wouldn’t get frozen. That was the last thing he needed.

Dean met him back at the hotel room a little while later, removing his sunglasses and hat. 

“Hey, so uh, this should go without saying, but this money I’m giving you is also assurance that you’re not gonna leak the footage anywhere and you’re gonna delete it, right?”

"Of course. I have no interest in pursuing this any further. Otherwise, I just look like a dick who leaked a sex tape," he muttered.

***

Cas peeled himself off the tiles and washed his face before realizing that this wasn't even his room. But he was naked. Oh god---he seemed to snap out of his daze quickly, peeking out of the room. _Oh fuck_ \---Meg? _Seriously?_ Ugh, he couldn't remember it anyway. Well, bits and pieces maybe, but nothing he really wanted to relive. He collected his clothes and as if to marry his shame and pity, he found he had left a drunken voicemail for Dean. Thank god he would be gone in the morning.

***

Now that Dean knew there were cameras in the room, they were easy to spot and he couldn’t believe he’d missed them before. But he guessed they couldn’t be found unless someone was actively trying to find them. Satisfied, he asked, “do you really need it in hard cash? That’s gonna be a pain in the ass for me. I could just send it to you electronically or something.”

Brad sighed. He really didn’t want to leave a trail. But he supposed he could set up a throwaway account. “Fine. God, you rich people are so high-maintenance.” 

Dean rolled his eyes, sitting back on the bed while he waited for Brad, then sent the rest of the cash. He didn’t even want to ask why Brad wanted it in American money, hoping he wasn’t going to follow him back to LA after the tour. 

“Alright, we’re done here. I really hope I never have to see you again. But enjoy my concert, I guess.” 

“Hey, me neither. You are a dick, but; hell you made one hell of a sex tape with that security guard of yours. If you wanna see it, here. Brad took a small flash drive out of his pocket and handed it to Dean. “That’s the only copy. Promise.” He shrugged and waved goodbye as he left quickly. 

“‘Course you watched it, you sick fuck!” Dean called out after him. He groaned. He sort of did want to watch the tape, but not now. It was too soon and he knew it’d only hurt. He deadbolted the door and changed out of his clothes, changing into a faded t-shirt and a pair of sweatpants .

Climbing into bed, he picked up his phone and called Jo.

Jo picked up only on the second ring, eager as always. “Hey! Hey Dean. Do you need anything? I can come back to your room?”

Dean cleared his throat. “I can’t sleep. Dunno what’s going on, but I’m feeling kinda paranoid here. Would you mind staying at least until I fall asleep?”

"Oh sure! Of course! I will be there in a second." She hurried, changing back in her uniform. She headed up to his hotel room and enthusiastically knocked on the door.

Dean hung up and pulled off his t-shirt, deciding to go for just the sweatpants. They were a little loose on him, so they hung low on his hips. He got up and unlatched the door, pulling it open for her. “Hey, thanks. I know it’s kinda late, but I can’t sleep. I’ve had a rough day...”

Her eyes ran over him and she felt flustered almost immediately. He was gorgeous and godlike and her jaw almost hit the floor. "Hey, uh, sure. I can stay for as long as you need."

“Thanks.” Dean closed the door behind her and walked back over to his bed, climbing in. “But, listen. It’s not gonna help me sleep at all if you just stand there and stare at me. So would you mind sitting with me?”

"Oh! Uh, sure." She nodded, shifting a little as she wandered over and gingerly took a seat on the edge of his bed. "Uh, here?" She asked.

“No. Take your shoes off and sit next to me. I won’t bite. I just...it’s easier for me to fall asleep if I’ve got someone beside me.”

"Same. I hate sleeping alone," she replied, although that wasn't entirely true. She slipped her shoes off and sat up next to Dean as requested.

“Thank you.” Dean rolled onto his side facing her. “Can I talk to you about something?” He asked softly.

She peered down at him, completely entranced in his beautiful doe-like eyes. "Of course, Dean, anything," she told him without hesitation.

“Look, I uh...know about your crush on me.” He propped his head up a pillow to look at her properly. “And I think you’re beautiful. But you’re so strict and you’ve got all these rules, so I can’t kiss you like I’ve been wanting to.”

She swore her heart had just leapt up to lodge itself in her throat. She couldn't believe he was telling her this and she was so flattered. "I um...I mean- Castiel was nothing. I'm in charge; I can do whatever I want," she breathed out. Apparently, him telling her she was gorgeous meant that any kind of morality went out the window.

Her words hurt a little bit, but he ignored it. He was on a mission. And he wasn’t lying after all. He did think she was very pretty, on the outside, at least. His mouth curled into a small smile. “So you can be a rebel sometimes, huh? Never woulda guessed.” He sat up and tenderly cupped her face in his hands, drawing her in to meet his lips.

She leaned into him, her hands immediately falling his chest as she felt her heart swell and heat flood immediately between her legs. Was this finally it? Would she finally get to sleep with Dean?

Dean smiled still against her lips, his hands reaching up so he could gently glide his fingers through her hair. “Mm,” he hummed, letting the kiss deepen as he flicked his tongue out across the seam of her lips.

She shook a little in excitement, her fingers grazing down his chest as she shamelessly pushed her hips down to grind against him.

Dean let out a light grunt in satisfaction, slipping his tongue into her mouth as his hands slid down to fit around her waist.

"Please, I want you inside me, Dean. I’m so wet; I want you to pull my hair and fuck me like a dog," she whimpered, looking at him with desperation in her eyes. 

“Mm.” Dean pulled back and looked at her, incredulous. He couldn’t believe the words that’d just come out of her mouth. Tightly-wound, no-nonsense Jo was begging him to fuck her.

“Uh...okay. I thought we were gonna go a little slower than that. But...yeah. Sure.” He cleared his throat, thrown a little off his game by that sudden request, but determined to keep up his suave appearance. He leaned back into her, pressing his lips to her neck and trailing kisses as he slid his hands up her shirt and pulled it off.

She had been dreaming about this for years and now that she had him pinned down to a bed, she was not letting up. She wanted him to fuck her; hard and fast. Anything sure beat her vibrator.

Dean took a deep breath. He did feel bad about this. He knew he was taking advantage of the fact that she was into him, but this whole situation was messed up. And he didn’t feel bad that she’d ruined his first chance at happiness and possibly Cas’ career. She deserved this. And he wasn’t going to let anyone but her see the tape anyway. It was just to scare her.

He pulled back, looking up at her as he slid her shorts and panties down. “Alright. How do you want me?”

She helped him strip her bare, her eyes on him as she swallowed thickly. "Fuck me however you want," she breathed out. She would do anything to please him, sexually or not.

“Okay.” Dean took her off his lap and got up. “Lay down, I’ll be right back.” He walked over to his suitcase and opened the small pocket on the side, taking out a condom.

Jo lay back against the bedsheets, her heart pounding as she stared up at the ceiling. She smiled a little to herself. She’d done it. Now with Castiel out of the way, she could have Dean all to herself.

Dean kicked off his sweatpants and walked back over, straddling her hips. He had her watch him take the condom out of the wrapper and roll it onto himself. He lowered himself down, to rest between her hips, holding her legs open and guiding himself into her with a groan.

Dean rested his head in the crook of her neck, beginning to thrust. He was normally pretty vocal himself in the bedroom, but he kept it to low grunts every now and then and tried to ignore how whiny she sounded when she was crying out.

This was perfect to her; she felt her orgasm fast approaching and she gasped, her stomach clenching. She cried out, coming loudly and clenching around his cock as she had a dry orgasm, her hands dropping to claw at the sheets.

Dean didn’t finish, but since he had the condom on, he could pretend. As soon as she came, he let out a groan, waiting for her to settle back down before he pulled out of her and quickly got up and went into the bathroom.

She let out a pleased sigh, gripping at his shoulders and all but holding him hostage there for a moment. "That was amazing, Dean," she breathed out, reluctantly letting him go.

Dean murmured something unintelligible in reply, taking a moment to collect himself in the bathroom before he returned to her and climbed back into bed.

The second he climbed back into bed beside her, she scooted close and cuddled up to him, her arm across his chest and her head resting on his shoulder.

Dean sighed, letting her hold onto him and he wrapped his arms around her waist. “Can I ask you for a favor?” He murmured, glancing down at her.

"Of course Dean, anything," she replied with a soft smile, letting out a pleased sigh of contentment.

Dean let out another sigh. Here it was. “Can you get Cas his job back, please?”

"Dean, I thought we went over this. He can't be your personal security guard. He risks your wellbeing. If that video leaked, it would have destroyed you. I'm not taking that chance." 

“Okay, but he got fired for having sex with me, right? And you just had sex with me. So how is that fair to him?”

"No, I fired him because it was caught on tape. What if it got leaked?" She tip-toed around the question, but she one-hundred percent got him fired because he’d slept with Dean.

“And whose fault is it that it got caught on tape, Jo? Can you tell me that? Because there’s no way some random fan would be able to just sneak into my room and install cameras.”

She felt her hands get a little clammy, her stomach clench in guilt as she feigned innocence. "Fans are crafty, Dean, I don't know." 

Dean’s eyes bore into hers. “I don’t like being lied to, Jo. Brad told me you hired him. Neither of you cover your tracks well. He sent that video from his personal phone number and he was very easy to find, sold you out for the right price. So you were trying to get Cas fired on purpose. Why? Did you think you’d get to have me instead? Why would I ever want to be with someone who’d do something so cruel? Maybe I would’ve considered it before all this...but not now.” 

"Oh, please Dean. I have been with you for what? Five years? You haven't looked at me twice, but he was with you for barely five minutes and the way he looks at you-" She looked like she was going to cry. "Cas is a liability. He puts you in danger-" She sat up, blanket pulled over to cover herself.

“Jo...I think you’re more of a liability than he is. You can’t fire someone because you’re jealous of them. Cas made me really happy, and if you actually cared about me, you’d want the best for me. I didn’t want to do this, but I didn’t see any other choice. Brad came back here and installed cameras again, so I’ve got a video of us tonight. I’m not gonna leak it anywhere or show it to anyone, but I have it. And if you give Cas his job back, I’ll delete it.”

"I'm not jealous. Not of that hippie looking fuck up with a drug problem." She screeched, getting out of the bed and pulling her clothes on. He had her in a checkmate and she clenched her teeth; _fuck._ All she could do was pray that Cas was already gone so Dean couldn't have him back. 

"Fine. Asshole." She spotted the camera and grabbed it, smashing it against the floor, then throwing part of the remnants at him. She turned on her heel, making sure to slam the door as loudly as possible on her way out.

Well...that could’ve gone better. And he did feel a little guilty. He knew that what he did was fucked-up, but he wasn’t sure what else he could do. He was desperate. After she left, he picked up the broken pieces of the camera with a sigh, tossing it in the trash. He wasn’t sure what would happen after this, if she’d stay on board or quit, but he didn’t really care.

Jo went back to her room, crying mostly out of guilt and heartbreak. She knew she’d fucked up badly.

***

It was creeping around to midnight and a very hungover Cas was dried out from puking, his eyes heavy and he was sick of being unable to sleep. He brushed his teeth and grabbed his coat, deciding to go for a walk to the 24 hour diner down the block from the hotel. He needed to think and make somewhat of a plan on how to get back to the states.

Dean should be happy, right? But he felt shitty. Sighing, he put his sweats back on and called Cas, hoping he’d pick up.

Cas peered down at his phone as it buzzed, his heart clenching. He reached to grab it but he remembered Jo’s words and forced himself to decline the call. Dean didn't care. And Cas wasn't going to keep feeding into Dean’s fantasy and ruin his career further.

“Fuck.” Cas wasn’t going to pick up, was he? He had to text him.

_Cas, please call me. I got your job back. And I really need to talk to you._

Cas accepted the coffee from the waitress with a small “thanks,” the overall aura he was giving earning him a sympathetic smile from her. He sipped, letting the terrible, burnt flavor wash away the night. His phone buzzed again, and he reluctantly read the message. He frowned. He’d already had a bad night, why not make it worse? He simply sent back the address of his diner.

Dean sighed upon reading the response. He really didn’t want to leave the hotel again, but for Cas, he’d do anything. He got up, changing into his ‘sneaking around’ outfit that he’d worn to meet Brad and checked his phone. It was nearly 3 in the morning, probably not the best time to be alone outside, but he didn’t care. He snuck out the back entrance again, plugging the address into google maps on his phone, and walking there.

He spotted Cas sitting in one of the booths as he arrived and walked over to join him, removing his hood and sunglasses. “Hey...geez. What happened to you?”

Cas was picking at some breakfast food, lost in a daze when he heard Dean's voice. It took him a second to realize, registering what was said to him. "Lost my job, my career and apparently my self respect and worth so..." he muttered, rolling the mug over his palm. "Got really fucking wasted and did some shit im not proud of."

Dean reached out to take his hand. “Well, you’ve got your job back, but I don’t know what I can do about the rest. But hey, I’ve been there. We all have. It’s okay. I’m the king of getting wasted and doing dumb shit.” He chuckled. “And honestly, I’m not proud of some stuff I’ve done tonight too, and I did it sober.”

Cas pulled his hand back so Dean couldn’t touch him. "I don't want my job back. I don't even want to know what you did to get it back," he replied, rubbing his forehead.

“No, you don’t wanna know. But why don’t you want it back, Cas? What happened?” Dean retreated his hand, letting it settle awkwardly back in his lap.

"Look, Jo was right. I would just rather go home. I'm sure they will find you a good replacement," he answered, avoiding Dean’s gaze. 

“You didn’t put me in danger, Cas. And I wasn’t...using you for pleasure. I...” Dean gritted his teeth. “This is all Jo’s fault. She set us up. She hired someone to install cameras in my room. She wanted you gone because she’s jealous. Don’t let her win.”

"But what if this had been someone else that caught us? What if you got hurt because I wasn't engaged in my job? Look, that's all kinds of messed up, but why do you want me back as your personal security guard anyway? You will find someone else, alright?" 

“You’re good at your job. You’re the only security guard I’ve had that I genuinely like being around, which is kind of important, because they have to be around me constantly. I don’t think I will find someone else.” Dean chewed his lip. “If you really don’t want to work for me anymore, maybe I can get you a job on the team that doesn’t require being alone with me. I just...want you around still.”

Cas really didn't have the disposable income to fly home, so his choices were limited. He would have to keep working. He would just need to keep his distance, and stop letting Dean suck him in and continue hurting him. He needed to get over him. 

"Alright,” he finally complied. 

“Thank you.” Dean’s eyes lit up. “You have no idea how much that means to me. Thank you, Cas.” His smile faltered a little. “But this means that we can’t really hang out anymore without another guard present. Like...I thought we could explore Rome together tomorrow. Maybe they’d make an exception, unless you have to work.” He sighed. This was going to be complicated now.

"Tomorrow is my day off. So you will have another guard taking care of you. I don't think hanging out would be a good idea. Plus, I'm sure someone else would enjoy your company."

Dean looked down. So it didn’t matter what his job was. Cas didn’t want to be with him anymore, didn’t have any interest in pursuing this further and he had to accept that. But he had to get this off his chest before it drove him mad.

“Okay, Cas. So we’ll stop this...arrangement. But I need you to know something because I don’t think you understood what I was saying earlier on the plane. When I was trying to tell you about how having feelings for someone who works for you is messy, I wasn’t really talking about Lisa. I couldn’t bring myself to tell you at the time, but I know that I have to now. If I’m gonna lose you, you need to know the truth. So...I like you, Cas.”

It took Cas a second, his brain whirring before halting in his mind _. What?_ He blinked a few times before he narrowed his eyes. "Wait, what? Why?" He furrowed his brows in confusion.

That wasn’t the response he was expecting. “Umm...I don’t know why, Cas. I don’t think there’s ever an explanation for these things. I just, do. And I thought you deserved to know because I don’t want you to think I’ve just been using you.”

"So you like fucking me?” Cas asked, needing some kind of clarity. "You...don't really know me, Dean. I know about you, your family, your music, the fact you hate plane rides and have a thing for brunettes. The fact you suck at dancing and eat like you were just released from prison. You love a good time, but mostly because you hate being alone. You don't think you are worth much, giving everything you have to strangers. You crave attention and the spotlight and use sex to help fill a void you can't explain." 

He realized he was rambling and quickly fell quiet, letting an awkward silence befall the two of them as Dean sat there dumbfounded, struggling to find the right words to say. He had watched Dean, always. He knew his little ticks, his quirks and the way his nose scrunched up in disdain. The fact that he thought of tomato sauce as a vegetable. He knew about his alcoholic dad and strained relationship with his brother.

"I will be on your team because you need a set of hands. But that’s all," he eventually replied. He liked Dean, so very much. But he didn't want Dean to only like him out of pity or because he liked his dick.

“But you don’t really know me, Cas,” Dean started once he’d gathered himself enough to speak. 

“You’ve known me for a little over a week. And you know the things I’ve shared with you. You’re perceptive, so you pick a lot up, but there are things about me you can’t possibly know because I’m still learning them about myself. I do like having sex with you, but it’s beyond that. I feel safe when I’m around you, and not just because you’re my security guard. It’s a kind of safety I don’t feel with any of the other guards. And I know I’ve fucked up, but that’s because I’m not used to this. I’ve never felt this way before and I don’t know how to handle it and I’m kinda terrified, honestly. And you’re right. I don’t know you beyond the fact that you’re just as damaged as I am, if not, more, and in the past, you gave your heart away to people who don’t deserve it, so now you shut everyone out because you’ve decided feeling nothing is better than feeling pain. But I know that you feel, that you draw and you write and you’re goddamned talented at it. And I’m sorry for snooping...I know I shouldn’t have looked through your journal, but I couldn’t help myself. I’m used to all the private things I write being broadcasted to millions of people so I didn’t think about how private it was. But remember that song I performed at my last concert after you calmed me down? I wrote it about you. Because that’s how you make me feel, Cas.”

"Wait, you read my journal?" His mind seemed to have stopped there. He flipped through the hundreds of stupid things he wrote and drew. His heart was all over the pages. Dean. It was full of Dean. His eyes, his lips, his face. Poetry, lyrics, stupid doodled hearts like some kind of dumb teenager. He wasn't angry at Dean; he couldn't be. He was the one who handed him the journal willingly. His cheeks almost climbed to being as red as the tomato sauce, his whole face blazing with utter embarrassment. He was an idiot. The rest of Dean’s heartfelt words would hit him later, but in that moment that stupid journal was all he could think about

“I did...I’m sorry.” Dean glanced down at the table, hoping he hadn’t just made everything worse. “I’m sorry, but I’m glad I did it. Because it solidified for me what having feelings for someone is like. And if I had a journal, you’d be scribbled all over it. But I don’t. I just write songs. And I’m supposed to debut a new one after every few shows because I’m working on a new album...but all I can write now are romantic songs. And I’ve never really written songs like that before and I don’t know how my fans are gonna respond to it, but I write what I feel.”

Cas searched Dean’s eyes for some sort of mockery or lie, but he was genuine. And Cas wasn't sure if he was terrified or excited, and he was in a hungover daze and his headache was clawing at him. This was all so much to process, but all he knew that he wanted was Dean’s comfort. He seeked his arms, his affection.

He grabbed Dean's collar and pulled him closer, "Dean. I’m going to have to ask you to shut up and kiss me," he breathed out, losing any kind of self control in that moment.

“I can do that.” Dean couldn’t conceal his tired smile as he leaned over the table and cupped Cas’ face, kissing him deeply. If that kiss they’d shared before meeting with Jo earlier was a kiss goodbye, this one was a kiss hello. All the relief and desperation he felt at having Cas close to him again poured into it.

Cas felt himself melt. His fear had drained away, relief washing over him and finally, his tired body relaxed enough until he felt like he could just fall asleep in the diner. “We should go back to the hotel," he murmured. 

_We._ The word made Dean smile. 

“Okay.” Dean pulled back and slid his sunglasses on again, putting his hood up. He took out his wallet and paid for what Cas had ordered, then offered him his hand. It had been a crazy day, but he was glad it was ending with Cas by his side. And he knew he’d made the right decision.

Cas was going to insist but he was honestly too tired. He pulled Dean close, squeezing his hand gently. He didn't want to speak, he just wanted to clear his mind and sleep this night off. But at least he could amuse Dean. "I fucked Meg. I think." He pulled a face as they left the diner. 

Dean laughed, leaning over to kiss his temple. “I fucked Jo. You wanna pretend today never happened?” It wasn’t easy navigating back to the hotel. One of them was extremely hungover and the other was wearing sunglasses in pitch black, but somehow they managed.

"I don't know which is worse," he breathed out, making his way into the lobby and wincing in annoyance. _Fuck_ it was so bright in there; he hated it.

“God, me neither.” Dean shook his head. “Here.” He took off his sunglasses and handed them to Cas, going over to the elevators and pressing the button. His hand still firmly gripped with Cas’, he leaned back against the wall once the elevator arrived.

Cas was appreciative, moving closer as the elevator closed. He knew no one would be around anyway; it was just dragging up to 4am. He leaned closer and pressed a soft kiss to Dean’s lips.

Dean smiled, holding the small of Cas’ back and pressing him close to his chest. Adrenaline was the only thing keeping him going at that point. Exhausted was an understatement. He stepped off the elevator once it reached the top floor and led Cas down the hallway to his room. He kept the lights off as he walked inside, removing his shoes and his hoodie and tossing them to wherever they landed in the darkness.

Cas leaned into him for a moment before retreating, squeezing Dean’s hand gently. He sleepily made his way to Dean’s room; all he could think about was falling asleep in his arms, kissing him slowly. He nudged open the door and removed his shoes, belt and jacket, yawning and dropping them aside.

Dean shut the door behind them, shrouding the room in complete darkness. He stripped to his underwear and felt his way around for the bed before climbing into it and waiting for Cas.

Cas slipped out of his jeans and shirt, feeling around sleepily for the bed and falling half on top of Dean, not that he minded. He pulled himself up, burying his face in Dean’s neck and relaxing into his embrace.

Dean let out a soft “oof” when Cas landed on him, but he was fine. Gratefully, he wrapped him up in his arms, pressing his lips blindly to any part of Cas that he could reach.

“Goodnight,” he murmured, gliding his fingers through his hair.

Cas let out a soft, muffled reply as he comfortably fell into a warm rest, shrouded in so much warmth and happiness that he swore he could have died right there and been content with it.

Dean quickly fell asleep himself, his body completely worn out. And with Cas’ warmth pressed against him, it wasn’t hard to be lulled to sleep.


	15. The Morning After

Dean woke up late, groaning and rubbing his eyes as he sat up to look at his phone. It was almost one in the afternoon. He groaned softly, looking over at Cas.

Cas was still asleep, cuddling Dean's pillow and drooling a little on it, his too long hair flopped in his eyes as he murmured soft nonsense in his sleep.

Dean smiled. Cas was an adorable sleeper and he looked so peaceful. He quietly tiptoed out of bed to get a glass of water and some aspirin. Cas had taken care of him after so many drunken nights. It was now his turn.

When Cas finally stirred, he sat up, grumpy and sporting a peacock-esque hairdo, squinting at his surroundings. 

“Mornin’ sunshine.” Dean chuckled. “Or should I say afternoon? There’s water and painkillers right beside you.” He was sitting on the other side of the room, eating a cinnamon roll he’d gotten from the a la carte breakfast in the lobby. There was an extra one on the table wrapped in a napkin.

"You are the worst," Cas hissed, not impressed by the light as he vampirically slid back under the covers, refusing to re-emerge in fear of his head combusting.

“Aw. Come on, sweetheart.” Dean set his pastry down and walked over to Cas. “I drew the blinds for you. Not sure how to make it any darker. You’ll feel better if you take this now.” He put the pills in his hand, gently nudging the mound of blankets that was Cas.

Cas poked his head out from under the covers, now distracted from the pain. "You haven't called me that before,” he murmured, taking the pills from him thankfully and downing them.

“I haven’t? Oh.” It had just sort of slipped out without Dean realizing. “Sorry. Do you not want me to call you that?” He took the empty glass from Cas once he was finished and set it down, gently rubbing his back through the covers. 

Cas broke into a small smile. "I like it." He took the cinnamon roll and picked at it. "Thanks. I mostly just have a headache; the diner food last night helped a lot."

“Oh, good.” Dean smiled back, climbing into bed again with him. “I know how it goes, believe me. Some painkillers, greasy food and maybe a nice shower are all you need. And some kisses.” He wasn’t sure what had come over him, but he felt extremely affectionate toward Cas.

Cas felt like he was going to be all but cooing and smitten with Dean if he kept up with his soft, affectionate behavior. "I will only take a shower if you come with me." 

“Damn, if you insist I guess I will.” Dean chuckled, reaching over and smoothing down his fluffy hair. He’d never had anything remotely this close to a relationship before, and they hadn’t really discussed what this was now, but he was going to start treating Cas the way he deserved.

Cas smiled a little more, pulling Dean closer and kissing him lazily, still a little sleepy. He felt his body warm immediately under Dean's lips and he ached to remove the previous night’s drunken mistake.

“Mm.” Dean couldn’t stop smiling, holding onto him and returning his kiss sweetly. “Did that work? Do you feel better?” He teased, gently nuzzling their noses together.

"A little, maybe if I taste you it might help," he breathed out, a mischievous smile creeping out over his lips.

"I still haven't gotten to choke your kinky ass yet and those toys in your bag are going to such waste." 

Dean shifted a little, biting his lip. “Mm...I’ll let you use ‘em on me whenever you want.” His tongue playfully flicked across Cas’ lips. “I’m more than happy for us to stay in this room all day fucking last night’s mistakes out of each other.”

"Mm, no better way for me to take out my jealousy of Jo than fucking you until you can't walk." Cas smirked a little. "You better have lots of lube and these walls better be soundproof." 

“If it makes you feel any better, I faked my orgasm with her.” 

Cas repressed a laugh, "that bad huh?" He murmurs, pulling back to watch Dean curiously.

“Mm. It wasn’t terrible. It just...wasn’t you.” Dean pressed another kiss to his lips. “Would you be interested in watching our sex tape, or is it too soon?”

Cas wanted to know how he’d gotten the full video, but he didn’t ask. "Mm, show me. I’m curious." 

Dean got up and took his computer out of his suitcase, inserting the flashdrive he’d gotten from Brad. “Technically, this has everything from the Paris hotel room.” He booted it up and got back into bed, wrapping his arm around Cas as he scrolled quickly through hours of footage until he found the start of them kissing.

Cas hit pause on the video, looking over at Dean. "I was...contemplating telling you this at all, as it is embarrassing, but when I fucked Brad, the only way I could get off was pretending it was you." He mutters

Dean stiffened a little at the mention of Brad. He’d almost forgot Cas had fucked the guy. He now wondered if he should even tell him. It might make him feel worse. He pushed the thought down. “Really? That’s sweet.” 

"Idiot,” Cas scolded at Dean’s dumb comment. "Keep that up and I will push you off the bed," he muttered, his eyes falling onto the laptop screen. He blinked a few times, mostly focused on screen Dean.

“Shh. No talking during the movie.” Dean rested his head on Cas’ shoulder. The quality was surprisingly good and he could hear as well as see, and he wasn’t sure which turned him on more. He leaned back against the pillows, setting his laptop on his knees as he watched. He’d never seen himself have sex before. He thought he’d be more embarrassed, but watching the two of them undress and touch each other was pretty hot.

Cas rolled his eyes; of course Dean was into the free porn of them. He continued to watch, his fingers gently grazing through Dean’s hair.

“Mm.” Dean’s heart sped up as he watched Cas begin to fuck him. There was no denying they had chemistry and this was way better than any porn he could find on the internet, though of course he was biased.

Cas gently nuzzled into and bit at Dean’s skin, not all that interested in the video. He had never really liked porn, even if it was of himself and Dean. But he could feel the rock star’s body stiffen with arousal which intrigued Cas.

"Are you enjoying it that much?" He murmured against Dean's skin. "Are you going to come from just watching?" He teased, grazing his teeth up Dean’s neck and tugging at his earlobe gently.

Dean whined. “Come on, this isn’t doing anything for you? Really?” He sighed. “Too bad there weren’t cameras in the bathroom. Could’ve watched me fucking you.”

"Not really, but I know it's getting you a little worked up and flustered which is turning me on," he mutters, pressing his semi against Dean’s back.

Dean shifted a little, reaching back and sliding his hand into Cas’ boxers. “Mm. Come closer.”

Okay, maybe Deans moan’s in the video were getting to him; a little. The sounds of his skin against Dean’s, watching Dean’s face as he was fucked and the explicit noises spilling from his lips...it was truly a sight to see. He scooted forward just a touch, grunting a little as he slipped his hand in front of Dean to palm at his crotch.

“Mm.” Dean pushed his hips eagerly into Cas’ hand, his erection tenting his boxers. He kept his eyes glued to the screen, watching the rhythmic movements of Cas’ hips as he thrusted in and out of Dean. It was near hypnotic. His hand curled around Cas’ cock and he began to stroke him as he watched.

Cas’ eyes were drawn back to the screen, his fingers stroking Dean off to the same rhythm as in the video. He had to admit, he was getting off on it. He never thought porn would; he showed little interest in it, but perhaps if Dean was a pornstar, he would never leave his room.

“Mm...fuck. This is turning you on, isn’t it?” Dean smirked, raising his hips a little. Dean onscreen was about to come and he shuddered as he watched, picturing the sheets staining with his release. He couldn’t help but moan a little, his hand working faster.

Cas growled in response, jutting his hips down a little. He brushed his thumb over Dean’s tip. "More. Is there more?" He asked as more of a demand than a question. 

“Uh...yeah. There should be. Hang on.” Dean was finding it hard to focus with Cas touching him like that. He scrolled through one-handed until he found himself on his knees sucking Cas off. “Ooh, this is hot.” He bit his lip, settling back in to watch as his hand returned to stroking him.

Cas focused on screen Dean, aroused as that Dean choked himself on screen Cas’ hard cock. Cas stroked Dean a little faster.

“Oh...fuck, fuck!” Dean’s cock twitched. Watching himself swallow Cas down while Cas was stroking him now was almost too much. “I’m gonna come,” he warned, his hand trying to match the pace Cas was setting.

Cas could feel his own orgasm creeping up, but he wasn't quite there yet. "Come-" Cas growled, watching his screen self shoot his load down Dean's willing throat.

That last shot was the end for Dean and he moaned out as he came hard, spilling into Cas’ hand. He breathed heavily, making sure he kept his hand working diligently over Cas. 

"Enjoy your orgasm." Cas tugged Dean's hand from his cock, knowing they had all the time in the world to play. 

Dean watched Cas in awe, shifting against the bed as he tried to catch his breath. “Fuck...” He watched his cum dribble down Cas’ palm and over his wrist and Cas licking it all up. “God...fuck. That’s hot.”

"You are so enamoured everytime I lick you or my hand clean." He chuckled, pressing a kiss to Dean’s shoulder. "I can't help it; you taste so damn good."

“Mm...because it’s incredibly sexy.” Dean leaned over and paused the footage, turning his full attention to his former security guard. “I want you to come on my face.”

Cas felt himself stiffen, blood rushing to from.his face down to his achingly hard erection. "Come-" Cas trailed off, his voice thick and dark with lust. There was so much he could do, but at that moment, all he wanted was Dean on his back jacking him off. "lay on your back." Cas growled in demand.

“Yessir.” Dean bit his lip, laying back and looking up at Cas eagerly. He tugged at the waistband of his boxers, urging them off.

Cas slid his boxers off, his tongue running out over his lips as he straddled Dean's chest, his ass hovering above his stomach. He took Dean’s hand and pushed it up over his hard cock. "Jack me off," he demanded, his voice dark.

This was the sight of his dreams, having Cas’ cock positioned directly in his face. He didn’t have to be told twice, his hand wrapping firmly around his cock, pumping him hard and fast as his other hand slid down to caress his balls.

Cas growled, leaning his palms against the wall above the headboard as he watched Dean. He was alive with pleasure, each nerve on edge. "Just like that," he breathed out, thighs shaking as he felt his orgasm dangerously close.

Dean smirked, shifting beneath him as he rubbed his thumb along the head of his cock, stroking the beads of pre-cum he leaked slowly down his shaft. “Come for me, baby,” he urged, making sure to hit every vein and nerve as he stroked.

Cas cried out mid stroke, his whole body tensing as a wave of pleasure slammed down onto him and he came, painting Dean’s face. He kept his eyes open, panting heavily as he looked over Dean’s face with a lustful gaze.

Dean closed his eyes and opened his mouth, letting out a shudder as he felt Cas’ warm release coat his face. It felt good, and he flicked his tongue out to clean the spots around his lips, tasting every drop of him that he could.

“Fucking hell, Cas. That was the hottest fucking thing...” he panted.

Watching Dean eagerly licking the warm cum from his face was definitely an image he wanted committed to memory. "Yeah..." he breathed out, agreeing. He would do it again in a heartbeat. He climbed off Dean’s chest, scooting down to lay next to him.

Dean smirked, pulling Cas into his arms and kissing him deeply so he could taste. “We have to do that again,” he panted, his hands wandering down his back.

Cas moaned into Dean's mouth, his hands racking down his side as he pulled the rock star close. He leaned into it for a moment before withdrawing, reaching for a tissue on the bedside table and cleaning the rest of the cum from Dean's face.

Dean chuckled a little. “What, didn’t wanna lick it off?” He teased. “I always love a good facial.” He smirked again, tangling his legs with Cas’.

"I prefer the taste of your cum." He rolled his eyes following Deans second comment, thoroughly amused. "You are an idiot." He reiterated, pressing soft kisses along Dean’s jawline.

“Mm. Sorry I can’t get my own cum all over my face. Would if I could.” Dean grinned cheekily, tilting his head back and sighing in content.

"It would be an impressive feat," Cas murmured, his fingers gliding up Dean's chest, adoring his smile.

“You wouldn’t have me any other way though, would you?”

"What do you mean, Dean?" He asked, his voice soft.

Dean melted against Cas’ touch. “Mm. You like that I’m an idiot. It’s part of my charm.” He laughed. 

"I do; you are so frustratingly perfect and I love it." His fingers traced over to caress Dean’s jawline. 

“Mm, I’m far from perfect, but thank you.” Dean closed his eyes, relaxing as Cas continued to gently touch his face. He was so glad he’d gone to the diner and confessed. This was where he was supposed to be, in Cas’ arms.

To Cas, Dean was. Annoyingly so. He was so arrogant and cocky and stubborn and charming and childlike and gorgeous and somehow; Cas found himself falling in love with him. Cas leaned in close and pressed a soft, lingering kiss to his lips.

Dean beamed, continuing to glide his hands gently up and down Cas’ back as he reciprocated his kiss. “Thanks for giving me another chance,” he murmured. “I’m gonna do it right this time.”

"It was all just a misunderstanding; you have nothing to apologize for," he reassured, his expression soft as he caressed Dean’s waist and back, unable to pull his hands away.

“No, I mean it, Cas. I’m gonna stop having sex with other people. I’m gonna give you my full attention as much as I can. I want you. I want to be with you. I know that now.”

"Wait, you are?" Cas asked, genuinely surprised. He wasn't expecting that; Dean was...Dean. people expected a party. He couldn't take that away. "Dean, you don't have to do that." 

“I want to, Cas. It’s not enjoyable with anyone else anymore. You know what happened on the plane.” Dean sighed. “I’m still gonna have my parties and all. I can’t disappoint the fans. It’ll just be drinking and talking though.”

"If you say so." Cas laced ther and squeezed. "I’m all yours," he said softly, nudging his nose against Dean’s cheek affectionately.

“Mm, good.” Dean grinned. He turned and kissed Cas’ cheek, loving how the warmth of his face felt against his lips. “So that said, later this evening, do you wanna go out with me? Rome’s got so many fancy, romantic restaurants. We’ve gotta try at least one.”

"You’re asking me out?" An amused smile played on his lips. "Sure! I would love that. Then I can see how slick and sauve you are on a date."

“Yes, I am.” Dean grinned. He leaned in again, kissing him slowly. “Mm. Just you wait. I’m gonna spoil the crap outta you. The best wine and pasta money can buy.”

"Mm, sounds like a fun night out." Cas chuckled. He was so excited, but he had never been on a date before, so he was a little stunned on what to wear, how to act; and that's when the nerves started creeping in.

“Mm. You’re gonna love it.” Dean grinned. “I promise.” He gently squeezed Cas’ hips. “When’s the last time you went on a date?”

And that's when the dreaded question was asked. "Uh..." He wasn't sure whether to lie so he didn't look like a complete newbie, but with Dean looking at him once again with his doe-like eyes, the answer just slipped out. "Never." 

Dean grinned. “Really? Me neither. Wow...this feels so much more special now. Pressure’s on, huh?” He chuckled, cupping Cas’ face. “God...you’re fucking adorable. Should’ve asked you out ages ago.”

"Really?" Cas was surprised; Dean always gave off a playboy attitude, but there really were no expectations if neither of them had done this before.

“Yeah. Never actually dated anyone. Just kinda...hooked up.” Dean shrugged. “I guess you’re the same then?”

“I mean, there was one girl, Hannah." He smiled a little, playing with Dean's hand. "Seniors in high school. She was my first time. I guess we dated but we were more like friends; she knew i was gay before I did and broke it off." He shrugged a little. "She was sweet and we stayed friends, but after graduation that was it."

Dean smiled. He’d never really gotten to go to school like a normal kid. He and his brother were homeschooled by a tutor his father had hired while on the road. And it sucked. “That’s really cute. I’ve never actually dated anyone either. Anything in the news about me having a girlfriend or whatever is fake. One girl will put her hand on my knee at an awards show and suddenly we’re a couple.” He rolled his eyes.

Cas chuckled. "Just be glad they only caught the girls with their hands on your knee," he teased lightly, a warm smile across his face. 

“Yeah, no kidding.” Dean laughed. He was young, but he’d already lived a life full of crazy stories, many of which he couldn’t wait to tell Cas about, but in due time.

Cas leaned in again, unable to keep his hands off Dean. He had never felt closer to someone, his fingers sliding through Dean's hair and pressed their foreheads together.

“Mm.” Dean smiled brightly, tilting his head up to kiss him again. “You wanna hop in the shower with me?”

"Mm, we can try. But every time we do, we come out kinkier than when we went in." He smirked a little, meeting Dean's lips again.

“I can’t help myself. You just look so goddamn sexy with water dripping down your muscles.” Dean ran his hands slowly down Cas’ chest.

"Mm, you like me putting on a show?" He smirked again. "Speaking of, we are in this city alone. We can sneak out and go to a strip club. I can give you a proper show." Cas’ eyes glistened with mischief. 

“Oh, fuck...” Dean practically drooled at the idea. “Can we make that part of our date? Mm...I wanna get into all kinds of trouble with you.”

"Mm, I will put on that tear-away g-string just for you. I'm sure you would enjoy knowing it's under my clothes."

“Hell yes I would. Mmm.” Dean started trailing kisses down his neck. “Does this mean I finally get to find out your stripper name?” He asked excitedly. Slowly pulling back, he got up and held his hand out for Cas.

Cas groaned and took Dean's hand. "It was a facade mostly; my VIP clients called me angel." He prayed that would be stuck and not the following as he climbed to his feet. "My name was Diamond Dan." He huffed in annoyance. "I hated it."

Dean laced their fingers together, leading him into the bathroom. “Angel is adorable. But why the fuck was your name Diamond Dan? You’re not...named Dan...”

"I lied on my application and said my name was Dan." He smiled sheepishly. "So that's what I was stuck with."

“Oh, man. That’s hilarious. I love it!” Dean grinned, laughing as he switched on the water. “I won’t call you Dan, don’t worry. But I might call you Angel.”

"I'm okay with you calling me Angel; it will help me get in the mood," Cas replied, climbing into the shower and running his head under the water.

“Mm. Good to know.” Dean got in after him, wrapping his arms around his waist and pulling him close. “You’re a very interesting person, Castiel. You never fail to surprise me.”

"There is a lot you will find out about me; I just apologize in advance for some of it. I'm sure Jo will take it upon herself to say crap about me."

“Something tells me we may not be seeing very much of Jo anymore. She called me an asshole and threw broken pieces of a camera at me.” Dean shook his head. “Guess I deserved it though. But anyway, I don’t care what I find out about you. I’m sure I’ve done just as bad, if not worse.”

"Geez, I'm curious, but I also really don’t wanna know." He looked concerned, his nose wrinkling. "After this shower, I am going to go back down to my room and get dressed, alright?" 

“You don’t wanna spend the whole day naked with me?” Dean teased, giving his ass a firm pat. He wouldn’t mind spending the day like that.

"It's creeping onto 4 o’clock." He chuckled. "We slept through the day." He grazed fingers through Dean’s wet hair, enjoying the touches.

“Ah, shit. Really? I’ve got no concept of time.” Dean laughed, his hands not leaving his ass. “I guess I’ve gotta get ready too then.”

"Mm, does that mean I get to see you in a suit again? Fuck, that's quite a look." He bit his lip. 

“Do you want me to wear the suit again? I totally can.” Dean grinned. “I’ve got more than one.”

"Mm, what colors have you got?" He asked, his voice low, imagining just how handsome he would look.

“I’ve got the classic, and then the same jacket but with a black shirt. Red shirt, navy jacket, navy shirt, brown jacket...and a fuckload of ties. They’re not all in my suitcase, but I can get them from wardrobe.”

"Why do you have so many suits, yet dress like a bum all the time?" He chuckled with a soft “tsk.”

“I don’t dress like a bum.” Dean scoffed, giving Cas another tap on the ass for that comment. “I just like being comfortable.” He shrugged.

"Mm, although you almost lost your shit last time your tie got wet." He laughed, content with teasing and riling up Dean. 

“Yeah, because it’s silk, Cas. That stains.” Dean sighed. “I care about fashion when I want to. Most of the time, I don’t want to.” 

Cas chuckled. "Anyway, can you wear a black jacket with a black shirt and skinny tie?" He asked, his eyes bright with excitement. He had a thing for a classy, all-black look.

“Yes, I can. I’ll wear whatever you want. What’re you gonna wear, gorgeous?”

"I have a suit in my bag. Luckily, there is an iron in my room." 

Dean shook his head. “You keep a suit in your bag? Cas...for a gay guy, you know nothing about fashion. No offense.”

Cas tilted his head a little, peering up at Dean. "No one ever taught me. Gabe tried, but I honestly dont have the money to afford it anyway.

“You don’t have to have a lot of money to have a good sense of style. It’s just about having the right eye for things.” Dean shrugged. “But I can teach you. If you want. First thing is not to crumple up a nice suit in a bag. Hang it up. Put plastic over it to protect it.”

Cas pulled a face. "And where am I going to put it? I’m a security guard, not a pimp.” He laughed, smoothing down his shoulder-length hair.

“Oh, god. Okay...you’ll learn.” Dean sighed.

"I have to go get dressed and pick something up; should I meet you back here at 6?" He asked, eyes on Dean.

“Yeah. I’ll see you then.” He smiled, pulling him in for another slow kiss before letting him go.

Cas hummed, pleased and not really wanting to go but, he had a date. He pulled back reluctantly and tapped Dean’s as s on his way out . He then dried himself off and got dressed, heading out to run a few errands first.

Dean waved goodbye to him, staying in the shower a bit longer to relax. He was going on a date with Cas. He could hardly believe it. He washed his hair and his body, then got out and blow-dried his hair. He briefly wondered if he could get one of his stylists to fix him up, but Cas didn’t have one, so he’d do this on his own.


	16. Fortune Favors the Bold

Cas was on his way back to the hotel when he saw a sign for a barber shop. He had caught his reflection in the mirror and knew he had to do something to tame his hair.

The guy was fairly cheap and he did a great job; Cas hardly recognised himself. With his now soft 5 o’clock shadow and properly styled short hair, he actually looked...good. He left the guy a tip and headed back up to his room. He worked on carefully pressing out his suit and dress shirt, hanging it up as he took a proper shower and was careful not to wet his hair.

After the shower, Cas patted himself down and put on his usual cologne and aftershave, which he hardly wore these days but figured it was a special occasion. He dressed in the navy blue suit that Gabriel had given him which, because he didn't understand the value of it, he just carted it around with him wherever he went. He wore his work boots because hell, it's not like he had anything else, and smoothed out his hair a little. He checked the time; it was creeping onto 6 and he gave himself a final checkover before heading up to meet Dean.

Deanslid on his robe and put his sunglasses and hat on in case any fans were by the hotel, because that clearly made him unrecognizable. He went down to one of the rooms that kept his wardrobe and was let in to go through it, picking out an outfit as Cas requested. He settled on a black Gucci jacket and belt and gold cufflinks with black Dior pants, shirt, tie, and shoes and a green Rolex Submariner watch. 

Dean got dressed back in his room, proud of himself as he took a glance in the mirror. He put on a dab of his designer cologne, then slid his sunglasses back on, a little giddy as he heard Cas knock on the door.

He answered it, his jaw dropping as soon as he saw Cas. “Uh...hello, sir. Are you sure you have the right room? I’m expecting Castiel Novak.”

Cas jumped a little when Dean answered the door, giving him a shy smile. "Shut up, dork." He chuckled lightly, looking over Dean shamelessly.

"Mm, you look so god damn sexy in that suit,” Cas purred out softly, his fingers brushing up to pull the sunglasses down a touch.

“And you...cut your hair. You don’t look homeless anymore.” Dean laughed, pulling him close. “I could just rip that suit off right here, Angel.” He smirked. “You look absolutely incredible.”

"Yeah well..." he was going to try and come up with something smart but he flushed, his cheeks burning as he accepted Dean's nickname and compliment without rebuttal. "Thanks.” He murmurs, his eyes on Dean.

“Mhm. Where’d you get such a nice suit from? Is that...a Valentino? Damn. I’m impressed.” He gently ran his fingers over the hem of the jacket, admiring the material. 

"Uh, I think so. Gabriel gave it to me as a 21st birthday present," he replied, his smile lightening, 

Dean nodded. “An uh...I like the haircut, but it gives me less to pull on now.”

"Mm, true but maybe you can just grab onto other parts of me instead." 

He gently tugged on Cas’ tie. “I can still pull on this.” He pulled back, trying to control himself. “You ready to go?”

Cas grinned. "See? You don't need my hair." He took Dean’s hand and tugged him towards the door before Cas had the chance to just lock him in the bedroom and strip him bare. "So, Mr. Suave, where are we going for dinner?"

“Mm, some place I can’t pronounce. It’s got a months’ long reservation list, but I got us a table in exchange for concert tickets. We might get some cameras pointed at us while we’re out, so just prepare yourself for that. But otherwise, it’s gonna be a super fun night.” Dean guided him out down the hall and toward the elevators, lacing their fingers together.

"Well then, do you think it's wise for us to be holding hands? I mean, that's what got us here in the first place. I'm sure you don't want the possibility of us getting caught." 

“We’re still just in the elevator. Let’s enjoy it for a few more minutes and I’ll let go when we get to the lobby.” He leaned over and kissed Cas’ cheek, catching a whiff of his cologne. “Mm...you smell really good.” He pushed the button to the first floor, taking every precious second of that ride to enjoy touching Cas.

"Okay." Cas relaxed, tugging Dean closer by his belt loops. He nuzzled his face into his jaw. "You like it? I only wear it for special occasions." 

“It’s intoxicating...mm.” Dean wrapped his arms around Cas’ neck, pulling him in for a kiss before the elevator doors opened.

Cas kissed him slowly, deeply, taking in Dean's taste for a moment before the doors dinged and he pulled back from Dean like he had been zapped. He had a sheepish look on his face, almost like he had been caught with his hand down his pants.

He stepped out of the elevator, making a beeline for the exit of the hotel.

Dean chuckled at him, reluctantly slipping his hands into his pants pockets to avoid the temptation to hold his hand. He adjusted his sunglasses and headed out the revolving doors that led out of the hotel.

Cas pushed through the doors, taking in the cool air and heavy smoke that Rome seemed to offer. He glanced around and noticed a few people staring. Was there something on his face? No, maybe they were looking at Dean instead.

Dean was used to the stares by then, keeping his head down as he walked. “It’s not far from the hotel, so we won’t have to walk much. Just ignore them,” he told Cas.

Castiel nodded, hurrying after Dean down the crowded street. He kept glancing at Dean; he couldn't help it. Even tucked in shades with a serious gaze and with his head bowed down, he looked adorably handsome.

They finally reached the restaurant and Dean pulled the doors open, letting Cas in then following behind him. He walked up to the hostess stand and lowered his glasses, speaking softly. “Uhh. Table for two, Winchester?”

The hostess nodded. “Right this way, sir.” She led them down to a small, candlelit table by the window, overlooking a river.

Cas was not as subtle, his eyes wide in awe as he looked around the restaurant. He had only seen these kinds of places in movies.

When his attention was drawn back, he followed after Dean like a puppy and slipped into the seat, a bright smile on his face. "Wow! This view is amazing," he gushed.

Dean grinned, pleased by how impressed Cas was with the restaurant. “I made sure we got the best table in the place. Nothing but the best for you.”

Cas felt himself flush a little and he wrinkled his nose at Dean. "I would be fine even in a shitty diner, as long as I'm with you."

Dean melted, his eyes sparkling. He wanted to reach out and hold Cas’ hand, but it’d have to wait. He picked up the menu instead, looking through it. “Hmm...it’s a shame I don’t really speak Italian either, but I think I can get by.”

"Oh, I would love to see you try," Cas mused, leaning his chin on his palm as he watched Dean intently, enamored by him.

“I don’t think you do.” Dean chuckled. “How bad would it be if I went to this fancy restaurant and just got spaghetti with marinara sauce?”

“Mm, not that bad because I am quite tempted to do the same myself." Cas grinned. "Besides, I have always wanted to try pasta in Rome," he said wistfully.

“Let’s do it. But we’ll get some nice wine, of course.” Dean laughed. “Do you know anything about wine?”

"I know there is red wine and white wine. You could swap out the labels on cheap wine for expensive wine and I honestly would never know.” He was a simple man, not used to the finer things.

“Mm. Okay. Well, tonight I’m gonna expose you to the world of fine Italian wines. There’s a sampler option where the restaurant will give you their five most popular to try.”

"Five seems like a lot of wine. If I fall face first into my pasta, you will have to carry my drunk ass home.” He chuckled lightly, his fingers gently flicking at the expensive card stock of the menu.

“They’re not full glasses, don’t worry. But I have no problem carrying you home.” Dean smiled. When the waiter returned with some bread and olive oil, he placed their order. 

Cas picked up the bread with a soft frown and took a bite, eyeing the olive oil as he tried not to laugh at Dean’s adorably awful Italian.

“You think you could do better?” Dean asked, breaking off a piece of the bread and dipping it in the olive oil before taking a bite.

"Oh no, surely I would get tongue tied," He admitted, squinting a little as he followed suit, but the oil dripped a little on his chin. He chewed thoughtfully. "Hm, not as bad as I thought it would be.” 

“Mm. Hang on.” Dean leaned forward with a napkin and gently dabbed at the excess oil on his chin. “There ya go.” He sat back, smiling at Cas. “I think it’d be really sexy to hear you speak in another language.”

Cas watched Dean, a little flustered as he got up close. "I speak a little Latin?" He offered out like a hand in the dark as he slightly tilted his head to the side.

“Ooh, really?” Dean raised an eyebrow. “That’s unusual. So many things I’m learning about you, Cas.” Dean’s lips curled into a smirk.

"Would you like to hear me speak some?" He asked, glad that they were in a fancy place that had rather elaborate place settings so he could brush his feet against Dean’s and no one could see. "Audaces Fortuna Juvat." His voice was low and sure as he breathed out the words with passionate ease.

Dean bit his lip, shifting a little in his seat as Cas spoke. “Mm...that’s hot. What does it mean?” He tore off another piece of bread, using it to distract himself.

"Fortune favors the bold," he answered. "or my personal favourite: Estne volumen in toga, an solum tibi libet me videre?" He breathed out, glad they weren't alone, or he would have Dean pinned down as he spoke in Latin, which he could tell was already affecting Dean a little.

Dean flicked his tongue out over his lips, letting out a soft breath as Cas’ low voice uttered the Latin words, breathy and just above a deep whisper. It sent shudders through him. “And...what’s that mean?”

Cas smirked a little, of course knowing a phrase in another language that was dirty and out of date. "Is that a scroll in your toga or are you just happy to see me?” His eyes creased up in amusement, laughing lightly at his own joke.

Dean chuckled. “That’s funny. I bet it was a great pick up line in ancient times, huh?” He glanced up as the waiter brought over their wine sampler and he picked up one of the glasses.

“Alright, so we’re gonna share all five of these. I don’t want to get drunk tonight, for once.”

Cas' smile softened and he nodded. "Alright, you try that one and I will try...this one." He circled his hand over the options before he picked up one of the red wines, pulling it closer and sniffing. It smelled nice. He took a sip. It was smooth and delicate, not sharp and bitter like the wine he was used to.

Dean nodded, picking up another red one. He swirled it around in the glass a few times before raising it to his lips, smelling it, then sipping it. “Mm. Tell me you can’t taste the difference between that and cheap wine.” He chuckled, setting it down.

"I can,” he admitted, taking another sip. He liked this one, "It's a lot better, less...dry and sharp," he answered, rolling the glass stem between his fingertips slowly.

“Mm. It’s supposed to go down smoother.” Dean smiled and took a drink of water before he set his glass down and picked up another one, going through the same process of swirling, then sniffing, then sipping. He felt so dignified, even though he’d only been legally allowed to drink for two years. Though it was five years here in Europe.

Cad followed Dean's movements, although his were a little shaky as he placed his glass down and tried another. This time it was a white. Sweet. "I like this one too."

“Mm. I probably can’t pronounce any of the names. That’s how you know it’s good wine.” Dean chuckled, sliding one of his glasses over to Cas. “Here, trade. And remember to save some for when the pasta gets here.”

"Okay, okay." Cas grinned, swapping their glasses over and taking a sip. He placed the glass down and attempted to pronounce the name but it came out more like a slurred string of incoherence. He chuckled, amused by something so trivial. Okay, so maybe the wine was going to his head a little.

Dean laughed. “You need to be cut off already? You’ve only had a few sips.”

"I'm not tipsy. I'm pleasantly buzzed. And I blame you; you put me in a ridiculously good mood.” 

“My bad. I’ll stop putting you in a good mood from now on.” Dean shook his head.

Cas smirked a little, nudging Dean with his feet. 

Dean rested his chin in his hands and leaned forward, admiring Cas and how adorable he was as he sampled wine. “How do you do that?” He asked, not meaning to say that aloud.

Cas looked perplexed. "Hm? Do what?"

“Huh? Nothing. Just...don’t know how you manage to be adorable and sexy at the same time. It’s confusing for me.”

"It's a special skill,” he mused. He wanted to reach out and touch Dean, hold his hand or caress his cheek, but with the risk of getting caught, he instead nudged Dean’s foot with his, a soft, adoring smile on his lips.

Dean nudged back, setting his glass of wine down as the waiter brought over their entrees. And Dean thanked him in his poor Italian. “Grazie.” He grated some Parmesan cheese onto his pasta, feeling fancy as hell as he twirled the authentic noodles around on his fork several times before taking a bite.

Cas thanked him in English softly; he wasn’t going to attempt any kind of Italian in fear of looking like an idiot. He watched Dean, although he skipped the cheese to try his hand at just the noodles. He swirled it around, scooping up a decent amount and pushing it between his lips. It was good-- _ really _ good.

“Not your average boxed spaghetti, huh?” Dean asked with a smirk. “Doesn’t get any better than this right here.” He took another bite, grabbing one of the glasses of wine they hadn’t tried yet and taking a sip.

“Mm...here. The white pairs nicely with the pasta. Try this one.” He passed it over to Cas.

"You sound like some kind of connoisseur. Do this often?" He chuckled, taking the offered glass and sniffing it first before taking a sip. 

Dean laughed. “Nope. But if there’s one thing I’ve learned it’s if you pretend to know what you’re talking about with enough confidence, people will believe you.”

"You don't have to pretend when it comes to me," Cas reassured, a small smile on his face. 

“Sometimes I just pretend because it’s fun for myself.” Dean shrugged. “If I can be some sophisticated guy who knows all about Italian wine pairings for a night, I’ll be him. And besides, it’s easy. You just say buzzwords like tannins, or oaky or discuss the state of the grapes the wine came from and people will think you’re the shit.” He took another sip of water, then took another one of the reds, sipping it, then another bite of pasta.

Cas rolled his eyes, having no idea what the fuck tannins were. Of course Dean enjoyed playing pretend. And it seemed he was halfway decent at keeping up the charade. 

"Wait, do I put food in my mouth then sip?” Cas asked after a moment, a little confused, his nose slightly wrinkled as he looked at Dean for guidance.

Dean shook his head a little at Cas’ naivety. It was adorable. “Just treat it like a normal beverage. It doesn’t have to be in your mouth at the same time.” He refrained from making a crude joke. 

"Okay, okay." He tried it again; it was nice. But he still preferred the red wine. "I like this one better." He plucked it out of the line up and took another sip. Yep, Dean would have to fight him for the rest if he wanted it.

“Mm. You can’t go wrong really. They’re all good.” Dean gently pushed his plate away once he’d finished, very tempted to burp but deciding against it. He was sophisticated now.

Cas finished off the pasta quietly, his eyes lifting as the waiter came back to collect their dishes. Cas wiped the sauce from his lips with his napkin, looking over at Dean who had a little sauce above his lip. He wanted to reach out and wipe it away but was met with solemn reality. "Dean, you have a little..." he gestured towards his lips.

“Huh? Oh, thanks.” Dean flicked his tongue out over his lips to get rid of it, relaxing into his seat. His eyes met Cas’ and he stared for a little too long, met with the overwhelming urge to kiss him. But he could control himself. He’d be able to soon.

“So, did you wanna order dessert here, or?”

"Well you see, I was thinking about dessert." Cas rested his elbows up on the table, lacing his fingers together as he leaned forward with a slight smirk, his voice low enough so only Dean could hear him. "I heard Rome has beautiful chocolate mousse and I may have a craving to strip you down, slather you in it, and then lick every inch of you clean with my tongue."

A shudder ran through Dean and he nodded slowly. “Yeah...let’s do it. I’ll ask for the check then.” He bit his lip. “Is this going to be before or after you put on a strip show for me?” He asked, his voice dropping to hardly above a whisper.

"After. Because this pink g-string is riding up a little and I would like to take it off sooner rather than later," Cas murmured, looking over Dean with a smirk as he brushed his foot over his ankle.

“Oh...I-I see,” Dean stammered, squirming around in his seat. Cas knew what he was doing, riling him up in a public place and it was almost a relief when the waiter brought over the bill and Dean took out his wallet.

Cas' smirk dissipated into an innocent smile as the waiter came to the table, the ex-security guard thanking Dean for dinner. He prayed Dean had thought smart and packed his wallet full because it was always more fun to dance when he could pull notes out of...places.

Dean got up once he’d paid, putting his sunglasses back on and starting out of the restaurant. “No problem. Trust me. Plenty more where that came from.” He grinned, his hands sliding into his pockets once again to resist the urge to hold his hand.

Cas slid out of his seat and thanked the waiter again, before hurrying out after Dean. "Mm." He wanted to make a comment on how he would make up for it later, but the teasing and sexual comments had to be withheld until they were in private again.

Dean started down the street that led to the clubs. Buildings flashed and glowed with bright neon signs and he grinned. “So, how are we gonna find an empty one we can use?”

"We just need to know the right people and strings to pull." He tugged out his cell and dialed Gabriel who picked up in a hurry, gushing and cooing over Cas. He waited for her to pour out her excitement and explained that he would call her later but for now, he needed a favor.

With the request, she had a lot of questions but obliged, saying she would get the ‘deets’ later. She told him to head up to a place called Exotica. They had VIP rooms that could be booked at a moment’s notice and for the right price, no questions would be asked. She told him she would sort it out and just to use his name at the door. He thanked her and hung up. "Done." He grinned. "Come on; we need to find a place called Exotica."

“Oh, wow, okay. Who was that?” Dean asked as he looked at the various signs. “You’d think I’d be able to find the right people for this, but you handled it. I’m impressed.”

"Gabriel." He smiled warmly. "She knows a lot of people in this industry, so it’s not a surprise she was able to pull something like this off." 

“Wait, Gabriel is a  _ she _ ? I know you talk about her a lot, but I never actually put that together,” Dean admitted. 

Cas nodded, his eyes settling onto a flashing sign that had  _ Exotica _ in bold, flashing pink. “Yes. In her industry, no one takes women seriously, so she gave herself a man’s name and it just sort of...stuck.” 

“Wow. Well, I’d love to meet her sometime. She seems pretty cool.” Dean looked up at the sign in awe, giddy excitement washing over him. 

"Perhaps some day.” Cas reached over and squeezed Dean’s shoulder.

“Okay, lets go." Cas slipped across the road, eyes bright as they reached the doorman in a matter of minutes.

"Novak." The man nodded, pulling back the velvet rope to let them in.

The place was packed with patrons, beautiful female dancers sliding up and down the poles, the air thick with money, smoke and sex.

“Huh. Well, I’m impressed.” Dean smiled, following Cas excitedly. No one would judge him in here. There were no cameras and other celebrities didn’t care about paying too much attention to him when he was around.

“Mm. Seems exactly like my kinda place.” Dean chuckled as his eyes scanned the room.

"Exactly your type of place," Cas murmured, taking Dean's hand and tugging him toward the back room. He mentioned his name again to the security, and they led him to one of the large VIP rooms that were hung with heavy curtains, leather seats, dim lighting, and a bar fridge.

Dean grinned, removing his sunglasses and slipping them into his suit pocket. He pulled the curtains back and looked around wide-eyed. “Shit, Cas. This is awesome...I should be the one taking you to cool places like this.” He chuckled. “But man, points to you.”

He slid off his jacket and hung it up on a hook beside the door, taking a seat on one of the couches. “Get your ass over here.” Dean beckoned him forward with his index finger. “I want a taste before you start the show.”

Cas grinned, happy that he could do something like this for Dean. He couldn't afford an awful lot, but he had plenty of connections. As Dean called him over, he felt a flood of relief. He had been craving Dean all night. In a few strides, he was straddling Dean's lap, devouring his mouth.

“Mm.” Dean’s hands slid over his ass and he squeezed, pulling Cas’ body flush against his.

“Fuck,” he murmured, pulling away briefly to catch his breath, his heart racing. “You taste better than the most expensive wine I could buy here.” Dean indulged himself for a few more moments, one of his hands sliding into Cas’ jacket to wrap around his waist, licking his mouth open and sucking on his tongue.

Cas grabbed at every inch of Dean, his hands settling in his hair and tugging a little, the compliment making him flush. "I could say the same about you," he panted, his back arching forward as he allowed Dean to suck on his tongue, a moan ripping shamelessly from the depths of his chest.

Dean raised his hips, his pants already starting to feel a little tighter as he listened to Cas moan. It took all the willpower in the world to pull away from him again, grasping his bottom lip between his teeth and giving him a final tug.

“Okay, okay. We’ve got all night to do that. And trust me, we will. But I’m dying to see you in that g-string.”

"Fuck, yeah I know," he breathed out, sucking in air and reminding himself to breathe. He took one last look at Dean before prying himself off his lap. "Alright, alright, ready for a show?" He grinned.

“I was born ready, handsome.” Dean smirked, scooting over to the edge of the couch and taking his wallet out of his pocket.

"Getting paid for a dance am I?" He mused, finding a song on his phone and placing it down on the table. He stripped out of his suit jacket, tie, boots and socks, leaving him in his dress slacks, button-down and belt. He adjusted the lights a little, taking a moment to put himself into the proper headspace. He decided he would opt for a little roleplay first. His whole demeanor shifted to something sensual, driven by sex and money and Dean was his customer. He moved closer to Dean, eyes trained on him as he took a hold of his tie and pulled him closer.

"Hello, handsome, you can call me Angel. Heard you requested me for a dance?" He purred out softly.

“I asked for the sexiest man in the building and they pointed me to you.” Dean smirked, shifting on the couch as he watched Cas undress. He hadn’t even started his routine yet and already Dean was growing antsy. He wasn’t sure how much of this he could withstand before he broke. He knew there was a shift in Cas instantly. This was no longer his date for the night. It was a stripper he’d paid to have the evening with. Dean fumbled, pulling two €20s from his wallet and tucking them into Cas’ shirt pocket.

"Something special huh?" He asked, his fingers tracing over Dean's tie slowly, his eyes locked with the rock star’s. "Do you have a song preference? I have a feeling you like older styled rock, maybe something sexy?  _ Pour Some Sugar on Me _ ?" He pulled on his tie. 

Dean bit his lip, nodding eagerly. “Oh fuck, yes! Perfect song.” He leaned forward a little, licking his lips. “You got any rules, Angel? How well do I need to behave myself?”

"That depends on how well you pay, and you can touch me anywhere your heart desires," he breathed out, giving Dean a playful wink. He pulled back, making his way over to his phone. Purposely bending over more than he needed to, he selected the song and pressed play. He started off slow, his hips swaying to the beat of the music as he let himself get lost in the rhythm.

Dean let out a soft groan as Cas bent over, getting ready to empty his wallet completely. Castiel was incredibly hot, almost too much so for his own good and Dean beckoned him closer, dangling another bill between two fingers.

Cas moved closer to Dean, his fingers drawing over his cotton shirt and down his chest. He unbuckled his belt, pulling it from the loops and snapping it out. His eyes were trained on Dean as he discarded the belt, straddling Dean’s thighs. He slowly unbuttoned his shirt, his hips swaying and dropping rhythmically over his thighs, but not quite touching him.

Cas rolled his chest, shedding out of the cotton shirt and pushing it off. He twisted it up and wrapped it over Dean's neck, his arms circling his shoulders as he pulled Dean close enough for him to feel the radiating heat of his bare chest.

Dean slid the bill into Cas’ pants pocket, letting out a long breath as he straddled his lap. He was sure Cas could feel how hard he was already and he was sweating right through his shirt. He reached down and unbuttoned it, letting it hang open so their bare chests could press together.

“You’re so fucking hot.” Dean slid his fingers through Cas’ hair, enjoying the slow movement of his hips.

Cas slipped his hands from around Dean’s shoulders and slid them down his chest, his fingers caressing each hard line. He leaned forward to breathe against Dean’s ear, "and you are so very hard."

“Can you blame me?” Dean asked, his voice breathy as his hips rolled slowly against Cas’.

He drew himself back to his feet, his fingers sliding down over his hips. He then turned his back to Dean, unbuttoning his pants and sliding them down around his ankles. He kicked them away, the g-string riding up high between his toned cheeks. Cas bendt forward, his palms flat on the carpet for a moment before he slid up, his fingers tracing his calves, knees, and inner thighs, then snapping the string.

He slowly turned back to face Dean, the pink g-string leaving very little to the imagination with the word  _ Diamond _ in rhinestones scrawled over the crotch.

Dean nearly collapsed on the spot. Seeing him in a g-string was better than he could’ve imagined and he couldn’t tear his eyes away.

“Fucking hell...” Dean motioned him forward again, watching the way he so expertly danced and slid his hands all over his body. It was intoxicating and there was no doubt in his mind that Cas was popular when this was his job.

Cas slid to his knees in front of Dean, his legs spread apart as he continued swaying his hips, running his hands up Dean's thighs and urging them open. He leaned forward, brushing his nose down Dean’s chest and towards his waistband, tugging at his belt with his mouth. He nudged Dean's belt loose with his teeth, undoing it and pulling it free from the confines of his pants. He maintained eye contact with Dean, looking at him through his dark lashes as he dropped the leather from his lips.

“Careful that’s Gucci–” but the words were swallowed back by a soft gasp. He pulled out a few more bills from his wallet, reaching down and folding them into his g-string. He felt as if his pants were about to burst open.

Cas leaned forward. "Material things can be replaced," he purred, "but the image of me doing that will last forever." He pulled himself to his feet, taking Dean's hands and urging him to stand.

He lifted Dean’s hands above his head, his fingers caressing down his arms, toward his ribcage and his waist, his fingertips circling over his hip bones as he continued to dance sensually, dropping himself into a squat before sliding up to stand again, inches from Dean and almost chest to chest.

“Well I can’t argue with that...” Dean bit his lip, standing obediently as Cas took his hands. He couldn’t peel his eyes away from the dancer. Every moment, every touch was designed to arouse Dean and it was working.

“Oh my god,” he breathed, undoing the cufflinks on his shirt and sliding them into his pockets before he pulled it off completely, tossing it over to the leather couch.

Cas slid his hands back up and turned Dean around, his fingers sliding over his back muscles and down to cup his ass for a moment. He never would have done that with a client, but Dean on the other hand...

He took Dean's hands once again and nudged him forward so the rock star's palms were flat on the leather seat, his hips jutted out. Cas ground against his ass, movements slow and feather-light, his fingers tracing over ridges of his waist.

Dean was in a state of pure ecstasy, letting Cas move and touch him like he was as malleable as a piece of clay. He pushed his ass out against him, leaning forward onto his palms and letting out a soft groan.

“Yes...” he panted. Just when he couldn’t be more overwhelmed by Cas, he cranked it up a notch.

Cas slid his hands through Dean's hair and yanked his head back, rolling into Dean in time with the music, his hips grazing over Dean's ass momentarily as his fingers slipped from the knots of his hair and down his back slowly. He braced himself, grabbing Deans waist and hoisting him up so he could settle between his legs and grind a little more.

Cas only did a few rolls of his hips before placing him down and tugging him back to standing. He trailed his fingers over Dean’s waist and moved to stand in front of him. He leaned back on one palm, almost like he was sitting on the leather couch, legs spread as he continued to perform, his body rolling in sensual waves. His eyes met Dean’s, lips slightly pouted and a glaze of sweat sheening over his entire body.

Dean’s breath was heavy, his own body slicked with sweat despite not moving nearly as much as Cas was. He’d seen strippers before, had his fair share of lap dances, but this was the best show he’d ever gotten in his life and he eagerly padded Cas’ g-string with more bills.

Cas grabbed Dean's waist and urged him closer. He stood up, his nose grazing Dean’s. He then climbed up onto the leather seat, taking Dean's hands and lifting them, tracing them down his chest slowly. He slid Dean's hands over his waist, hips and to his inner thighs.

He hopped down, pushing Dean back onto the couch as the song ended, then climbed back up to straddle his waist. Giving Dean a smirk, his fingers caressed his hair, and massaged his earlobes. He was close enough that Dean would be able to feel his heat and smell the cologne and sweat.

"Did you enjoy your dance, handsome?" He asked, his fingers slow and rhythmic.

Dean felt like he was hypnotized, limply obeying Cas’ every move and letting the occasional moan spill from his lips whenever his hands made contact with Cas’ heated skin. Every movement was erotic, bordering just along the line of a typical lap dance customer and a lover and he was enthralled by the whole thing, especially when his hands were moved along his inner thighs, dangerously close to touching him.

And when Cas ended up on his lap, Dean was stuffing every last bill from his wallet into the waistband of his underwear. It couldn’t be comfortable how much he was carrying now, but it was sure as hell hot to look at.

“I don’t have the vocabulary to come up with a word that describes just how much I enjoyed that, Angel,” Dean replied breathlessly.

Cas tipped Dean’s chin up, his thumb pushing along his bottom lip slowly. His eyes moved from Dean's lips, then back up to look at him directly, another small smirk on his face. He tugged on the ribbon that held his g-string together, slipping it off and letting the bills fall to the floor, then balled it up.

"Open," he instructed, eyes back on Dean's lips as he slipped the still warm g-string into Dean's even hotter mouth. He was now completely naked, eyes on the rock star. 

"Such a good client. My favourite by far," he praised, his voice low and heavy with lust and his eyes half lidded.

Dean’s eyes trailed slowly down Cas’ body and watched with awe as he removed the g-string, the money raining down on the floor like confetti.

Obediently, he opened his mouth and when Cas pushed the panties into his mouth, he let out a muffled moan. “Holy fuck,” he tried to say, but the words weren’t anything legible.

He nodded instead, reaching down to unzip his dress pants.

"You know, I would usually charge extra, but you have been so very generous and you are so very needy, aren't you, baby boy?" He purred softly, sliding off Dean's lap to settle on the floor in front of him.

"So hard, all for me?" He feigned innocence as he tugged Dean’s pants to his knees and stroked him through his boxers.

The nickname had Dean shuddering and he nodded his head slowly. ““Mm...thought I was gonna be your sugar daddy, but I’ll be your baby boy. Whatever you want me to be. I’ve already emptied my wallet for you, Angel. But I’ll give you more...all the money you want.” He glanced down at Cas, parting his legs eagerly as his cock gave a jump against his touch.

"Not necessary," he breathed out. "Not if my baby boy is already so worked up." He freed Dean from his boxers, wrapping his hand around his hardened cock, his thumb milking the tip as he licked at the head slowly. 

Dean gasped, his cock giving an eager twitch as Cas finally touched him.

"Mm, you taste so good. May I?" He asked for permission. "if you say yes i will let you cum on my face." He offers.

“Yes, please...” he groaned. Never before had he gone through so much foreplay without being touched, and if Cas had kept up the dancing just a little bit longer, he would’ve come completely untouched. That’s how much of an effect he had on him.

"You can be both. But something tells me you would submit under me without a breath of hesitation." He ran his tongue over Dean’s velvety tip, his fingers slowly stroking his hardened cock. It was slow and purposeful. "Mm, so beautiful," he murmured, leaning down and swallowing Dean's cock.

Dean leaned his head back, letting out a loud, unabashed moan as his fingers wound through his now much shorter hair. “Fuck...fuck. I’m gonna come!” It really didn’t take that much as he’d already been so worked up.

"Are you going to come on my face, baby boy?" He pulled him from between his lips, stroking him quickly. "Mark me as yours? Make me your Angel? Come on, baby---"

“Yes...” Dean panted, his chest heaving. “You’re my dirty little Angel...” He let out a grunt as his cock began to leak and he jutted his hips forward, painting Cas’ face with his release and god...it was the hottest thing he’d seen all night. And there was stiff competition.

Cas opened his mouth, tongue out as he put on a bit of a show as Dean painted his face. His fingers slid down his face, pushing the release he caught between his lips and sucking his fingers.

Dean collapsed back against the couch, a complete wreck as he watched Cas. The show apparently wasn’t over. “Fuck...” he muttered, at a complete loss by how incredibly hot Castiel was.

"Mm, your orgasm face is so beautiful; how is it you could be that handsome?” The compliments flowed freely, Cas leaning in to press soft kisses on Dean's thighs as he rode out his high.

“I could ask you the same question,” Dean breathed, his heart still hammering in his chest. Each kiss made his nerves ignite and he groaned softly. “Cas...come here,” he urged.

Cas climbed to his feet and moved closer, sitting on Dean's lap. "Hey, you know that was for fun, right?" He gently cupped Dean’s face.

"I don't want a dime from you. I don't want your money. Ever," he murmured, brushing his thumbs over his cheekbones. "I just want you."

“Mm. I know. But you have to let me spend my money on you, though. That’s what I do.” Dean trailed his hands slowly up Cas’ thighs, looking into his eyes.

"You are welcome to, but I don't want to be your stripper. I want to be...equal to you. These performances are fun for me, and I miss them, but I only want to do them for you." He combed his fingers up through Dean's hair slowly. "Although raining money was definitely fun." He chuckled, leaning forward to press a soft kiss to Dean’s lips.

Dean nodded, wrapping his arms around Cas’ waist and holding him close as they kissed. “Mm. You don’t work for me anymore. We are equals. And you’re not my stripper. You’re my...boyfriend who strips for me sometimes.” He smirked. “I mean...if that’s what you wanna be, of course.”

“You want me to be your boyfriend?" He asked softly, his spine stiffening a little. His heart was racing, his fingers massaging his skin as he considered the question.

The moments between him asking and Cas answering were agonizing, but when he said “yes,” Dean gave him the biggest grin and hugged him close. They had a lot to decide, but it could wait. For now, he was just going to enjoy being close to Cas.

Cas couldn't help but smile, resting his chin on his shoulder as he cuddled him close. "How is it you make me so happy?" Cas murmured, his arms wrapped around him.

“I dunno, but you make me feel the same way.” Dean glided his fingers through Cas’ hair. “I can’t get over how short it is now. I mean, I love it. You just look so different.” He chuckled.

"You sure you like it? I mean, it will grow back. I just felt like a change." He pulled back to look at Dean properly.

“I love it.” Dean gently stroked his hand across Cas’ cheek. “I don’t care what your hair looks like, honestly. You could make anything look sexy.” He smiled. “But you look more mature like this, cleaner.”

Cas chuckled, taking Dean’s hand and pressing a kiss to his palm. "I could grow my hair out to my waist and become a hippie; change my name to Moonshine and only speak in limericks," he joked.

Dean shook his head. “You’re something else, Cas. But you’d still probably look sexy. Don’t push your luck though.” His hands returned to Cas’ waist. “Mm. So this mousse...are we gonna come back here and do that, or go back to my hotel room?”

"Maybe your room, because you have a shower there and I have a feeling the mousse will be extremely messy.” He leaned down to press his lips against Dean’s again, absolutely enamoured.

“Good idea.” Dean wrapped his legs around Cas’ waist, kissing him deeply and getting lost in it. He didn’t want to stop. His hands slid down to cup his ass.

Cas let out a soft moan, squeezing his thighs against Dean's sides. "Dean..." he breathed, wrapping his arms around the rock star's neck and pulling him closer.

“Hm?” Dean smirked a little, his nails lightly dragging over the curved, toned flesh. It was impossible to keep his hands off Cas, his head dipping to press his lips to his pulse on his neck.

"More," he begged, unable to get enough of Dean. His legs squeezed Dean's waist, his blunt nails clawing at him desperately. His whole body was on fire, the once slow build crawling up to a needy longing.

“What do you want me to do?” Dean asked softly, his hands trailing down to glide over the backs of his thighs. He gently sucked on his pulse point, letting his teeth graze over the spot.

Cas let out a whimper, his cock twitching against his stomach as all that built up tension stirred within him. "Touch me. Dean, please." His voice was quiet and whimpery. 

This was far different from the Cas that had just stripped for him and Dean couldn’t decide which version he preferred. He gave him what he wanted without hesitation, licking his palm, then sliding his hand down to wrap against Cas’ cock. He pumped him slowly, looking into his eyes. “Is this what you wanted, baby?”

“Yes, yes, yes-" he breathed out, submission coming to him easily as his eyes stayed glued to Dean. He chewed on his lips, not holding back with the obscene noises like he usually did. He was moaning loudly, unrestrained as he let pleasure take over.

“God, you sound so beautiful,” Dean praised, his thumb brushing over the head of his cock. He wanted Cas to moan for him like that every single time. He worked him a little faster, loving the way he throbbed in his hand.

His head fell to Deans shoulder, his legs shaking as his orgasm came fast and hard. "Dean- Dean, I'm coming, I'm coming!" He panted, giving an earth-shattering moan as he gripped Dean’s skin, his seed coating Dean's stomach as his moans died out to a whimper. His thighs tensed, body aching with pleasure.

Dean milked him through his orgasm, letting out a grunt as he glanced down at his stomach. “Fuck...” The way Cas cried out his name as he came made his whole body shiver and he shifted beneath his weight.

Smirking a little bit, Dean traced his finger over the pool of cum and raised it to his lips, licking it clean. “Mm.” He continued the process, not breaking eye contact. “You taste so sweet,” he murmured once he was finished, licking his lips.

Cas hadn’t seen Dean do that before, purposefully seek out his cum to taste it. He was speechless, swallowing thickly as he stared in utter awe. 

"Dean." He pulled him into another kiss, this one less desperate, more driven by the affection he felt. He knew he had fallen for Dean, fallen hard. There was no more denying that.

Dean grinned, pulling Cas close to him again. His fingers slipped up through his hair as they kissed, marveling at how soft it was. Breathless, he put his hands on his shoulders, locking eyes with him and taking a moment to appreciate his beauty. He was in total awe.

Cas pulled back to look at Dean properly, entranced in their world, his fingers sliding up to brush over Dean’s features slowly. He could stay like that forever, lost in Dean’s beauty. Instead without thinking, he recited a poem to Dean that he’d written just for him, his voice soft:

_ “I would give my life to you  _

_ Even if you called me a fool  _

_ I would risk it all for you  _

_ Because life is good when it’s just you  _

_ Your hand brushes mine  _

_ And it’s like all the stars align _

_ And I cannot imagine  _

_ A more perfect moment in time  _

_ But please believe every word I say  _

_ Whispered late and in the dark  _

_ Your lips warm against my skin  _

_ Your fingertips finding their mark  _

_ I’ll be your angel  _

_ If you catch me when I fall  _

_ You’ll be my long lost lover _

_ Who triumphed over all  _

_ And please believe every word I say  _

_ Whispered like wind through the trees  _

_ When I say your kiss is like sweet honey  _

_ And I’m one of a thousand eager bees  _

_ I would give my life for you  _

_ Even if you wouldn’t do the same  _

_ I would give my all to you  _

_ And you’re the only one to blame  _

_ Your lips brush mine  _

_ And it’s like all the stars align  _

_ And I cannot imagine  _

_ A more perfect moment in time  _

_ Because that moment is spent with you.” _

Dean’s heart fluttered as he listened to Cas, his eyes soft and filled with wonder and amazement. He leaned up, pressing a slow kiss to Cas' lips once he was finished. “That was beautiful! Did you write that?”

"Mhm," Cas replied. He felt a little stupid, considering he had never read any of his poetry out loud before, let alone to someone like Dean, but in the moment, he felt compelled to do so.

“I loved it.” Dean grinned, shifting a little beneath him. “You know...I was thinking...and that poem you just shared solidified this idea...but I might have a different job for you. What if instead of working on the security team, you became a co-songwriter?”

Cas had always dreamt of going to college, becoming a famous poet. But his teen years made that dream fall flat. And now with Dean offering him this, it felt...right? But as always, Cas was a little skeptical.

"Dean, come on. I'm not a songwriter. I’m a security guard. No one wants to hear that."

“No, you come on. I feel bad about reading your journal, but you had some amazing material in there. And of course, we don’t have to use any of that. That can remain private. But you’re so talented. Why waste your creativity by doing security? I can tell where your passion is. And you’ll receive some recognition for it. Plus...I could really use your help. I write all my lyrics and music by myself and my agent keeps trying to push me to sing all these songs written by other people because I can’t crank my own out fast enough, but I don’t wanna do that. I want to put out genuine content, not whatever’s gonna make more money or top the charts.”

"You really think I'm good?” he asked, his voice soft as he watched Dean. He was so incredibly private about the things he wrote. His fingers brushed down to gently massage Dean's shoulders. "And you aren’t saying this because you are in a sex-dazed euphoria?"

“Yes, I do. And I’m sure.” Dean chuckled. “But if you don’t believe me, you can submit some stuff to my agent and see what she thinks. You don’t have to give me an answer tonight. Just...something to think about.”

"Okay." Cas nodded, deciding he will think about it. It was a big thing to commit to and he wasn't sure just yet. His eyes shyly met Dean’s again, his smile soft. He almost regretted sharing the poem, only because it was a raw part of his heart. "Dunno 'bout you, but I need a drink."

“A drink sounds wonderful.” Dean chuckled and took Cas off his lap, then got up, heading over to the mini fridge to see what was there. And of course, he had to bend down to check. “What would you like, beer or something stronger?”

Cas caught himself staring at Dean and pulled his eyes away. "Stronger," he answered, climbing off the couch to distract himself. He tugged on his pants, not minding the panties and slipped the belt back into place. He moved on to his buttoned shirt, his tie crooked as he pulled it back on.

“Getting dressed again?” Dean asked as he took out a bottle of Frangelico and two glasses. He made his way back over to the couch and sat down, biting his lip. For some reason, watching Cas dress was just as hot as watching him undress.

"Well I am not going to just lounge around nude, Dean," he replied with a raise of his eyebrows, his fingers making quick work of buttoning up his shirt. He took one of the glasses from Dean with a small smile. "Shot me." 

“I was going to. We’re alone.” Dean set the bottle down as he picked up his boxers and slid them on, then poured Cas and himself a shot, raising his glass to toast. “We can’t get fucked up on this though, okay? Still have to walk to get the mousse, then make it back to the hotel.”

"As you wish." Cas tipped his head back and downed the sweet beverage, letting out a pleased hum as he rolled his head forward, holding out the shot glass in a silent request for another.

“Mm.” Dean tipped it back, pouring them each another one. “Hey, you wanna do a body shot off me?” He asked with a small smirk.

"If we do that, I can guarantee we are going to get fucked up and pass out here," he answered smoothly. He knew how quickly it would escalate.

Dean laughed. “Yeah...alright we’ll wait for the hotel then.” He poured them each another, then put the cap on the bottle.

Cas shot it back with a content sigh, making his way over and flopping on the seat near Dean, stretching out a little. What a night so far.

Dean grinned over at his now-boyfriend. “Should I take this bottle back with me?” He asked with a small laugh. “I can hide it in my coat.”

"You have plenty of booze in your hotel room; I'm sure we won’t need another," Cas mused, reaching out to lace his fingers with Dean’s.

“No such thing as too much booze, babe.” Dean gently squeezed his hand, pulling him closer. He set the bottle down and climbed up onto Cas’ lap, clasping his hands together behind the back of his head.

Cas chuckled, adjusting himself under Dean as he allowed his fingers to explore and caress every inch of him. Thighs, hips, stomach, waist; every move feather-light and full of adoration. "I could stay like this all day," he murmured.

“Mm...and I’d let you.” Dean hummed softly in approval, resting his head in the crook of Cas’ neck and enjoying his affectionate touches.

Cas drew his fingers up to trace along Dean's back and along his spine slowly, each touch more intimate and slow than the last. "I really like you, Dean. I haven't ever been this happy before.” 

“I really like you too,” Dean murmured, pressing his lips to Cas’ neck as he spoke. “You feel so good.” He pressed himself a little closer, knowing it would be nearly impossible to get himself to leave that room, even if it was only to head to another place to be alone with Cas.

Cas leaned his head back on the couch, letting out a gentle sigh. They weren’t leaving the room, not ever if Cas could have his way. His fingers massaged Dean's thighs slowly. "Do you have a condom?" 

“Mm. I should have one in my wallet. Hang on.” Dean leaned over as far as he could without getting off of Cas’ lap, just barely able to reach the Givenchy leather wallet he carried around. He grabbed it, rifling through the pockets until he produced a condom and handed it to Cas. “Always come prepared, right?” He smirked. “Holy shit. That would make such a good slogan.”

Cas rolled his eyes. "You are an idiot. But you are my idiot." He tilted Dean's chin down and kissed him softly, slowly. Each move tender and fluttering over Dean’s skin with ease.

“Mm. I’m honored to be your idiot.” Dean chuckled, shifting against his lap and letting his eyes close as he was kissed. He couldn’t get enough of Cas’ mouth, wanting to sit there kissing him forever. And the soft, gentle way Cas did it made him melt.

The kiss was slow and intimate, his fingers slipping to under Dean’s knees and flipping them so he was on top. His lips immediately found Dean's neck, tracing every pulse with his tongue.

Dean let out a low grunt, reaching up and pulling Cas’ tie off again, letting it hang loose around his neck as he undid the buttons. There. That image of him was incredibly sexy and Dean licked his lips. “For fuck’s sake. It’s like I’m staring at the cover of a men’s fitness magazine.”

Cas felt his cheeks flush, tensing a little as he murmured a “thank you” at the compliment. He then slid his shirt off. Dean had been right; he wasn't sure why he’d bothered with clothes when he was just going to take them off again. He slid down to Dean's collarbone, kissing down his chest slowly.

“Mm.” Dean bit his lip, arching his back and raising his chest as Cas kissed him. It was cute when he blushed, and again there was that immediate shift from sexy to adorable that made his head spin. “You’d better get used to these compliments. I’m not gonna stop.”

"I don't think I ever will." He pushed Deans boxers back down, soft kisses pressing over his jutting hip bones, nipping at the supple skin as his nails dragged Dean’s thighs. "You are so delicious."

Dean let out a few deep, breathy moans. “Mm...fuck. I want your lips all over me, Cas. Make me yours.” He grunted, his legs shaking a little when he felt Cas’ nails on his thighs.

Cas didn't move from his hip bones, starting there. He was a little sloppy at first, but soon left a decent trail of hickeys down to his thighs, each movement slow. He wanted to have Dean quivering and begging to be fucked.

“Mmf...fuck. Yeah...just like that.” Dean let out another moan, raising his head and glancing down to admire Cas’ work. His cock began to ache with need and he raised his hips eagerly.

Cas slipped his head down between Dean’s legs, taking his balls into his mouth and sucking, massaging them with his hot tongue.

“Cas!” Dean cried out, his hips bucking upwards. “That feels so fucking good...” he reached down, tugging at the ends of his hair. “Please. I need more. I want to feel you.”

Cas reached between his own legs, stroking his cock quickly. He sits up, his free hand grabbing Deans thigh and lifting it up. He spat onto his palm, stroking himself. Leaning over him, he tore open the condom, rolling it onto his cock, then pushed inside Dean slowly. He reached down and heatedly kissed Dean’s lip, a moan slipping from his throat as he bottomed out.

“Mmmf!” Dean raised his hips eagerly, letting Cas move him as he pleased. He watched him stroke himself with wide eyes, his legs quivering with anticipation. He grabbed onto him, pulling off his shirt the rest of the way and bringing him flush against his body, moaning into his mouth.

“Cas...” he breathed out, his legs wrapping around his waist.

Cas continued to kiss him slowly, his fingers sliding up to intertwine with Dean’s and pushing their palms into the leather seats. He rocked his hips, slow and rhythmic. He was shaking with pleasure, his body alight with so much passion and care for Dean.

Dean let out a soft gasp, his lips molding to Cas’ as he gently squeezed his hands. This felt much more intimate than previous times and moans spilled from his mouth and into Cas’. This was the perfect way to end their night.

Cas pulled back from the kiss, his forehead pressing against Dean’s. Their breath mingled together, heated and quick as Cas murmured affectionate praises about how beautiful and amazing Dean was.

Dean’s heart was a puddle. He drank in every word of praise, every deep thrust. His movements against Cas became more eager, his cock throbbing, trapped between their abdomens. He knew then, looking deeply into his eyes as Cas made love to him, that he was in love. He wouldn’t let him go if his life depended on it. And he wanted to tell him, to let this beautiful, amazing man on top of him know how he felt, but all he could say was, “fuck...I’m gonna come!”

Cas was lost in Dean's gaze, his heart caught in his throat as every praise and affectionate word; Latin, English, Spanish, all poured from his lips adoringly as he fucked Dean. No, made love to Dean. He hadn't ever felt like this before, but this was deeper than sex. It was exciting and terrifying. And when Dean exclaimed that he was going to come, all Cas could reply with was a soft grunt.

Dean tilted his chin up, raising his head to capture Cas’ lips again. He let out a loud moan into his mouth, his thighs squeezing around his waist as he came hard across their stomachs. He saw a flash behind his eyes and his whole body seemed to convulse, shaking as he experienced an orgasm more intense than he’d ever felt. It was like he could feel it in his very soul.

Cas felt Dean seize up and come, his thighs quivering as he rode out his intense orgasm. Cas soon followed suit, painting the inside of the condom. _ Fuck _ , he was Dean incredibly gorgeous, his moans irresistible.

Dean gasped for breath, biting his lip as he listened to Cas come. “Mm...Christ, Cas. We aren’t leaving this room tonight are we?” He chuckled.

Cas grinned lazily, his fingers caressing Dean’s thighs slowly. "No. Definitely not." He chuckled, pressing slow kisses over Dean’s neck.

“Oh well. We can always get that mousse another day. But I do have a concert tomorrow night.” Dean chuckled, having almost forgotten why he was in Rome in the first place. He tilted his head back, enjoying the gentleness of Cas’ kisses.

"Mm, well maybe I should wait in my room until your party is over, cover myself in mousse and you can imagine it slowly melting over my naked body." Cas smirked down at him. 

“Mm...I’m gonna be imagining that for a while now.” Dean licked his lips, pulling Cas in for another slow, deep kiss.

Cas smiled , leaning down to return the kiss, his tongue lazily caressing against Dean’s as his fingers slid down his tense thighs and up again over his waist.

Dean grinned, letting his eyes fall closed and simply enjoying Cas’ touch. He relaxed against the couch, holding him on top of him.

Cas kept up the gentle, rhythmic touches. Soon enough, his breathing slowed and sleep finally washed over him in a calm wave. He slipped into a peaceful rest, content with being snuggled on top of Dean.

Dean held Cas close to him, lulled to sleep by his gentle touches. He wasn’t sure how long the room was theirs, and didn’t mean to fall asleep, but he was too comfortable, too safe resting beneath Cas’ warm body.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you enjoyed Cas' poem. Initially, we were going to have Cas quote some song lyrics, but I (Moose) decided it would have more meaning with an original poem. So I wrote one. I'm not much of a poet, so this was a bit of a challenge for me. But if you enjoyed it, I'll include more in the future!


	17. Destroyed

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for your patience, everyone! I hope to be back to regularly updating again. - Moose

When Cas woke the next morning, he was still in a dreamy, love-filled daze of the world consisting only of Dean and himself. He smiled sleepily as he sat up, pressing a kiss to Dean’s chest.

It was only when he was awake enough that his brain tipped over and he went into a panic. _Fuck, fuck!_ They had been out all night. Cas toppled off Dean, scrambling to pull his clothes on “Dean-" Cas hissed.

“What, huh?” Dean groaned, rubbing his eyes sleepily and pouting at the lack of contact as Cas climbed off of him.

He sat up to see him scrambling to get dressed and his eyes widened. “Oh, fuck. What...is it morning? Shit!” He slid off the couch and found his clothes, tugging them on and smoothing them down as nicely as he could. He hadn’t expected to be doing the walk of shame, but walking from a sex club to his hotel in broad daylight with his ‘security guard’ would not be a good look.

“Cas...fuck. This isn’t good. How the hell are we gonna get out of here without people noticing us on the street?”

"Look, I may not be your bodyguard anymore, but I will be damned if I let you get caught out for this. Get dressed and call a car to meet me on Fifth," he instructed, hurrying to pull his clothes on.

Dean nodded, patting his pocket for his phone and looking around in a panic when he couldn’t find it. He dove into the couch, feeling around until he’d grasped it. It had fallen behind the cushion and he sighed a little, quickly calling for a car.

“Okay, Uh. It’ll be here in ten minutes.”

"Alright. How do you think you would do climbing out a window and running?" Cas asked, dead serious as he watched Dean for a response.

“Uh...in this suit? I can try...but I may not go very fast.” Dean slid his phone back into his pocket and did another sweep of the room with his eyes to make sure he hadn’t left anything behind.

"That's fine." Cas smoothed out his hair, then checked his pockets to make sure he had everything. "Are you ready?" He asked, doing his mandatory checks as he glanced out the door. The coast was clear.

“As I’ll ever be.” Dean sighed, stepping out of the room. Luckily, it was closed now so no one was around. And no one had bothered to check last night and kick them out. “Okay, so how are we gonna climb out the window? Am I gonna have to get on your shoulders or something?”

Cas chuckled, as amusing as that would be to witness..."No, dumbass. Usually places like this have windows in the bathroom. Won't be too hard to climb onto a lid and climb out.” He did another sweep before quietly making his way to the far south of the room, where from the layout, was the most possible place where toilets would be.

“Oh, god...this whole thing just sounds like it’s gonna ruin my suit. I shoulda brought a change of clothes or something.” Dean sighed, walking down the stairs and toward the back of the club until he found a sign for the bathrooms and motioned Cas over.

Cas followed Dean down the steps and into the bathroom. He scanned the room, and just like he thought, there was a window. He climbed up onto the toilet and pushed it open, peering out; no people. It seemed to be down a back alleyway . "Stay here, I'm going to go out and check to make sure no one’s nearby, okay?”

“Okay.” Dean chewed his lip in uncertainty. 

Cas hoisted himself up and gracefully jumped out the window. It wasn't too high up so he wasn't worried about hurting himself. He dusted himself off and jogged to the end of the block. The streets were still rather barren and luckily Rome's overcast weather had people still sleeping in. No reporters, no cameras, that was good. He hurried back and called out, "coast is clear!"

Dean stepped up onto the toilet lid very carefully, his legs wobbling slightly as he climbed up onto the window, sitting on the edge and not so gracefully sliding down once he’d gotten the okay. He winced, looking behind himself to make sure he hadn’t ruined his suit at all. “Shit. I feel like Spider-Man.”

Cas stayed close to the window as Dean fell out of it. He helped dust Dean off. "After this, you are going to wish you were. Fifth is only about two blocks away. We can either split up or go together, whatever seems less conspicuous."

“Hang on.” Dean reached into his pocket and pulled out his sunglasses, sliding them on. “Okay. I say we should split up. It’d be better if we don’t run, because that’ll just draw more attention.”

Cas patted Deans cheek. "I will head out first; that way if I see any paparazzi, I can give you a signal to hide."

Dean nodded. “I really want to kiss you right now, like we’re some couple in an action movie about to break for a mission, but we probably don’t have time for that, so…”

"You can kiss me in the car." He smiled a little, setting out first and waving quickly.

Dean chuckled, watching Cas leave the alley. It truly did feel like he was in some sort of spy movie, sneaking around in his suit and sunglasses like an honorary man in black. Giving Cas a bit of a head start, he walked down the alley and peered around, crossing the street as he didn’t see anyone and making his way to Fifth.

Cas walked rather briskly, stepping off onto the curb and sighing in relief as he saw the car. He climbed in, settling back on the leather seats.

Dean walked around to the opposite side a few minutes later and slid into the seat, removing his sunglasses and combing his fingers through his hair as he looked over at Cas. In a deep voice, he said, “ah, Mr. Novak. You’re right on time.” He leaned forward and grabbed Cas’ tie, pulling him closer. Just against his lips, he murmured, “so glad you could make it.”

Cas was relieved when Dean climbed in and his ridiculously cute voice had him grinning and laughing. "How could I be late to see such a handsome face?" He muttered, leaning in to kiss him.

Dean smirked, curling Cas’ tie around his wrist. “Fair point.” He let go and cupped his face instead, kissing him deeply and only pulling away when he needed to breathe.

Cas leaned into Dean, not caring about the fact they smelled of sex, sweat and booze. He didn't care that they had morning breath or were exhausted. He pulled him closer, arms around his neck as he kissed him lazily.

“Mm...” It wasn’t a long ride back to the hotel, but Dean wanted to make every second count since he wasn’t sure how much time he’d get with Cas once they returned.

Dean pulled back slowly, brushing his nose gently against Cas’ as the car pulled up outside the hotel.

"Okay, come on. We need to make sure we can sneak you back in," Cas murmured, reluctantly pulling back. He scooted to the door of the limo, then immediately froze, seeing the last person on earth that he wanted to see at that moment.

"Oh no." His panicked eyes fell back to Dean. "Crowley is here." He was the head boss. Above Jo. Someone Cas had only met once and prayed he would never have to meet again.

“Fuck.” Dean’s eyes widened. Even he was afraid of Crowley. He carefully stepped out of the limo and straightened his tie, his glasses sliding back on.

“Okay...Cas, I’ll uh...handle this.” He cleared his throat, keeping his head down and hoping by some futile measure that he’d go unnoticed as he entered through the lobby.

Cas felt such a flush of doom and worry as he slid out of the limo, his body tense and his heart racing. He stepped into the lobby and just as expected, Crowley's dark eyes fell on him first. 

"Well, well, look what the cat finally dragged in. Mr. Winchester, Mr. Novak, please join me in the conference room." His voice was smooth, but ultimately laced with poison.

Dean let out a sigh. This was Jo all over again, but a thousand times worse. He was going to develop PTSD from that damn conference room. He shuffled his feet as he walked in, muttering every swear word under the sun beneath his breath, then took a seat.

Cas felt his nerves bubbling up and he so desperately wanted to flee, but he forced himself into the conference room and sat down, his heart almost exploding out of his chest. Crowley unbuttoned his stiff suit jacket and closed the door behind them.

"So, I am sure you know where this is headed, gentlemen." He took a seat across from them and his eyes fell on Cas, who refused to look up from the table.

"I received a call yesterday evening stating that my security team had....misplaced Mr. Winchester. But I see that he did have supervision after all." His voice was slow, his words careful and concise.

“Misplaced me? Crowley, I’m not some kid that ran off or something. I’m fine. No harm done.” Dean wanted so badly to reach over and take Cas’ hand, but he kept them in his lap, fidgeting.

"You hired my services to keep you safe. Guarded. But I see now that although we have had great success in protecting you up to this point, our new little recruit has become a security threat. He will be terminated from my agency as well as Jo. She is a liability to our work and instead will be replaced.”

Dean pursed his lips. He wondered if he should just agree to it, but that meant Cas would have to accept the songwriting job and he wasn’t sure he wanted to do that, so he’d fight. “But I am safe. He was with me the whole time and nothing happened. And good that you’re firing Jo. You know what she did to me?”

"I am well aware of what she did," he stated firmly. "She has been punished accordingly." His jaw clenched for a moment, Cas shivering. "And I have heard Castiel has been quite the drama-stirring employee. I think it is best to let him go. He is my employee, and I think he is a risk." His eyes fell on Cas and he nodded numbly, unable to think.

Dean knew he couldn’t win this, so he hung his head and removed his sunglasses, slipping them into his pocket. “So who’s gonna be their replacement?”

"All employees have been let go except for Meg. She was the only one who alerted me to what happened. She will be taking Jo’s position and you will have a new security team in place for the show tonight." 

“Oh my god. Crowley, are you fucking kidding me? You can’t fire everyone, but keep Meg. She took advantage of Castiel, you know. She’s horrible. I’ll just find a new security company if Meg is gonna be the one in charge.”

"Do you have proof of this?" Crowley asked, knowing full well that neither of them did. "And your concert is in a few hours, Mr Winchester. While I implore you to explore security options, I assure you that you will not find ones with this short notice."

“No, sadly Jo didn’t have cameras installed in his room too. But man, maybe that would’ve been useful,” Dean replied angrily. “Why would I make that up? It’s bullshit that I should even need proof for that.”

"Dean. It's okay." Cas reached out, his voice soft as he brushed his hand over Dean’s shoulder momentarily.

"I will clean out my room," he told Crowley. 

"No need, Castiel." He gestured towards his bag in the corner of the room.

Cas panicked a little, wondering who had packed it. He climbed to his feet and hurried over, crouching by the bag and his heart sank. His journal had been torn to shreds and the extra cash he had hidden was gone. _Fuck_. He sank to his knees. He had just ruined his career, put Dean in harm’s way because of his stupid, narrow train of thought, and now he’d lost everything.

“No. This is fucking unacceptable, Crowley.” Dean rose to his feet, pointing at Cas. “Look what you’re doing to him. Who went through his things like that? You wanna talk about fucking unprofessional? Why don’t you take a look at the people you’re hiring. Yeah, maybe Castiel messed up, but I coerced him into it and he was just doing what I asked of him. You fired Jo. But you’re keeping Meg who makes it her mission to piss me off every chance I get and who had sex with him when he was drunk. I refuse to work with her.”

Crowley stood up, calmly making his way over to Deans side of the table. He contemplated hitting Dean but considering it would leave trace evidence, the thought was brushed aside. "I do not work for you. I may give into your childish whims and petty ways, but considering I am being paid by someone else, I would suggest you stop pushing it. Who did you think was paying for your security, boy? It's not your accountants," he snapped.

“Crowley, I just want to know who packed Cas’ things? Was it Meg?” Dean gritted his teeth. He was on his last grain of patience and even if it accomplished absolutely nothing, he was still going to be stubborn and difficult. 

"Dean, please." Cas sighed, trying to get him to stop talking before he potentially made things worse. He was broken up, his heart on the floor and sadness pouring out of every pore of him. He needed to find somewhere to stay, and he needed a minute to cry. But it wasn't going to be in the conference room.

"Thank you for the opportunity, Mr. MacLeod." He bobbed his head politely, hoisting his bag up and leaving the room.

"I suggest you get ready for your concert, Mr. Winchester," Crowley stated firmly.

“Yeah, go fuck yourself.” Dean huffed and left the room, sunglasses back on. He went to the elevators and rode it up to the top floor. What had started as the perfect night had spiraled downward so quickly, and he was in no way in the mood to put on a concert, but he’d never let down his fans. Once he got to his room, he undressed, hanging up his suit to be taken for dry-cleaning, then hopping into the shower. He wondered if Cas was going to show up at the concert, and while he wanted nothing more than to run to his side, he also knew it would be best to give him his space. 

Cas barely made it out of the hotel before he started to cry. His lack of sleep and violation of his property, piled onto shame and humiliation had pushed him over the edge. He fought the silent tears away, ignoring passing patrons. He found an alleyway, out of the prying eye of the public, and let himself fall apart.

When Cas finally scraped himself off the cool cement, he brushed himself off and headed downtown. It took a while and when he finally reached a comfortable motel, he paid the overly expensive room fee with the little money he had left and took the key, making his way in. He showered, cleaning the previous night from his mind. He wanted to see Dean’s concert but he had no ticket and hell, security wasn't going to let him in. So he did some searching around on his phone and found a fan site where he could pay a fee and watch a life feed of the concert.

Dean got in his awaiting limo to the concert venue, his head down the entire time. He didn’t want to talk to anyone, look at anyone, exist too close to anyone. He was beyond pissed, and he missed Cas. Once he arrived, he was taken through a brief rehearsal, then wardrobe and makeup, until he was onstage. He quickly switched to his performance persona, no longer the Dean that was fuming and in distress, but the crowd-pleasing rockstar who was playing for thousands. It was his only way of making it through, compartmentalizing. 

“Buona Serata, Rome! How we feeling tonight?” He kicked off his first song as the audience cheered and he prayed that just this one time, no one would jump onstage.

Cas shot Dean a message although he wasn't sure if he would get it before going onstage. _good luck tonight, Dean_ . _I know you will be great._ It was short, but he knew how the rock star could get and wanted Dean to know that he was still very much on his mind. He then sat back and watched the concert, Dean not much more than a hard to make out blur with how far away the camera was, but he didn’t care. 

Dean went offstage for his quick break, taking a moment to drink some water. He was still in performance mode, energized from the adrenaline of being onstage. His phone was lying on the vanity in his dressing room, lit up with a notification. He quickly grabbed it, a soft smile forming on his face when he saw it was from Cas.

He chewed his lip as he typed, giddy like a teenager texting his crush. _Thank you. Wish you were here. Can I see you afterwards?_ ❤ 

Cas felt his phone vibrate, his heart racing with excitement as he saw it was a message from Dean. He wanted to hold him, to cuddle up to him and tell him what a beautiful performance he did but he wasn't sure that was a good idea. Dean surely had fans to see. And he couldn't face the shame of going back to that hotel. Even if it was for Dean. Was he really a danger to him? A distraction?

Dean hadn’t heard back, but he had to go onstage again, so he left his phone and got mic’d up. He played his new song, the one he’d danced with fans to at his last concert, but danced with one of the back-up singers instead this time. The crowd completely ate it up, and flowers were thrown onstage instead of a wild fan. Dean liked Rome. He picked up a couple and brought them backstage once the concert had ended.

Cas loved Dean's newer song the most. It felt more...him. Genuine and open, and seemingly the crowd loved it. And it was good to see Dean in brighter spirits than when he first got on stage. He had been so tense and short, very professional but now he was back to the way he usually was when he performed. Careless and happy. Cas sent Dean another message. _“You know, that new song of yours is my favourite. You looked so happy singing it. And I could tell even though I could hardly see your face._ It was a little nudge to let Dean know he had been watching.

Dean was quickly ushered back into the limo to head to the after party he’d nearly forgotten about. He pulled out his phone, smiling when he saw he had another text from Cas.

_So you were watching the concert? How? I’m glad you like it...you’re the main inspiration for it. Told you I couldn’t write sappy songs like that until you brought it out of me._

_Logged onto a fansite, apparently for a price I can watch you play live._

_You paid to watch a livestream of my concert? Cas. You should’ve just come. I would’ve made sure you got in backstage._ Dean shook his head.

_I’d really like to see you tonight. I can come to you. Just tell me where you are and I’ll be there after my party_.

Cas didn't know what to say. That he would feel like a burden? A fanboy? He also couldn't bear the thought of running into Meg. He sighed softly, responding reluctantly with just the address of the motel he was staying at along with the room number and where he’d hidden the key outside.

_Thank you. I’ll be there in a few hours. Don’t fall asleep on me. ❤ ❤ ❤_

Dean stepped out of the limo and into the hotel, going up to his room where the party had been set up for him. Jo had made him paranoid, afraid that whoever had brought in the champagne had also installed cameras, but he couldn’t see any. So he greeted the fans as they walked in and poured their drinks, making sure he went light on the drinking himself so he wasn’t too out of it to see Cas later.

Cas climbed out of his bed and made his way over to the duffle bag that he had been avoiding. He gently unzipped it and it was like his heart fell out all over again. It was a journal that was gifted to him, so it had sentimental meaning. He gently smoothed out some of the pages but others were ripped, wrecked beyond recognition. All his feelings for Dean, the things he had drawn and written; each page with Dean's eyes were especially ruined, water having made the pages fall apart and turn to nothing but a gluggy, wet mess. About an hour in, his vision blurred and he just couldn't deal with the trainwreck anymore. He threw the journal out, refusing to look at it any further.


	18. Chocolate Mousse

Dean went through the motions of his party, trying to make it as pleasant an experience as possible for his fans, but he wasn’t fully present. He played a few songs, took some selfies, danced, then said goodnight. A few complained, saying that the party wasn’t at all like what they were expecting, but he simply told them the rumors about how his parties went weren’t true. He hoped he could soon shake that part of his reputation. 

Once they were gone, Dean changed into his normal clothes and went to the sink, filling a glass with water and placing the flowers he’d picked up onstage in it. He grabbed his sunglasses and jacket and looked around, knowing Meg was right outside and it would be more difficult to escape than the last time. So he’d have to go out a different way. He quietly opened the balcony door and stepped onto it, making his way down the fire escape. This might’ve been the scariest thing he’d ever done as he was on the top floor and terrified of heights, but he eventually made it to the bottom, the small glass with flowers having spilled in his jacket and the glass dropped and shattered, but the flowers were still intact and that was all he cared about.

He broke into a run on the street, heading to the closest restaurant that was still open and ordering a large container of mousse to go. He then checked his phone for Cas’ address and plugged it into his phone. He could walk there...but he wanted to run, to get there as fast as he could. So he did.

Breathless, he arrived in front of Cas’ motel and grabbed the hidden key, unlocking it and stepping inside.

Cas had picked himself up and climbed back into bed. He was shirtless, his hair tousled and his sweatpants low on his hips. He was half-sprawled under the sheets, watching mindless videos on his phone as he heard the doorknob rattle. He placed his phone down and sat up, the sheet pooling around his waist.

Dean smiled a little as he walked in, setting what he’d brought down on the table and making his way over to Cas.

“Hey, baby. I brought you a few things.” Cas looked like he’d just gone through a messy break-up and the sight of him was heart-wrenching to Dean. He kicked his shoes off and climbed into bed with him, pulling him into his arms and hugging him tightly.

Cas managed a smile, his heart skipping when Dean called him ‘baby.’ He hugged him back, having missed their intimacy already. The warmth of his body, his comforting smell. He leaned into it before reluctantly breaking away. "How was the party?" He asked softly.

Dean shrugged. “It was fine. They weren’t happy that I wouldn’t have sex, but I think they still had a good time.” 

"You know you can have sex with them if you wish, Dean," Cas replied softly.

“I know. But I don’t want to. I’ve always felt kinda gross afterwards. Like...they want me because I’m famous but they don’t actually respect my body.” Dean shrugged. “That’s too heavy a subject for right now, though.”

Dean smiled a little and got up, retrieving the flowers that were now a little crushed and wilted, and the container of mousse and brought them back over to Cas.

“I think the two of us can have a much more fun party if you’re up for it.”

Cas’ eyes immediately lit up. "Oh, these are beautiful," he murmured. He had never received flowers before.

“They were thrown onstage tonight and I thought you might like them,” Dean explained. 

“I do, thank you.” Cas grinned. “ What’s in the box?” 

Dean smirked, opening the box to reveal a container of chocolate mousse.

Cas sat up to peer into the box, bursting out into a fit of laughter. "Mm, and what do you plan to do with that?" He asked, although knowing full well.

Dean opened the lid and dipped his finger into the spongy chocolate and wiped it on the tip of Cas’ nose. Smirking again, he leaned forward and licked it off. “Mm...damn. This is good.”

Cas laughed and nudged Dean back, straddling his waist and pinning him down to the cheap mattress. “Gimme that.” He took the chocolate container and scooped out a decent fingerful. He slid it between his plush lips with an elated, soft moan.

Dean bit his lip and looked up at Cas, shedding his flannel and tossing it to the ground. He placed his hands on his hips, watching him suck the mousse form his fingers. “Fuck...if that’s not one of the most erotic things I’ve ever seen.”

Cas grinned around his fingers, pulling them from his mouth with a soft pop. He tugs Dean to lay down properly, dipping his fingers into the mousse and smearing it over Dean’s chest slowly. "Mm, now that is sexy." he murmured.

Dean glanced down at his chest, then back up at Cas. “You’re gonna have to clean that up now.” He smirked.

"I’m okay with that." Cas pressed his chocolate-covered fingers against Dean's lips, pushing them inside his mouth slowly. He took his time, his fingers caressing his tongue and rubbing against the inside of his cheek. He growled, pulling them out slowly and wiping the rest off on the cheap sheets. He then dipped his down, starting off slowly as he licked and sucked the melting chocolate mousse from Dean's smooth chest.

It didn’t take much for Dean to become a squirming, panting mess beneath Cas, moaning around his fingers as he licked them clean and raising his chest. He reached down, undoing his jeans and raising his hips to push them down, giving Cas more room.

Cas sucked on Dean's nipple, giving it all his attention as his fingers lifted Dean's waist, giving him room to move as he needed to strip out of his clothes. He moved over to Dean's other nipple, licking and nipping at the bud slowly.

“Oh, fuck...” Currents of pleasure coursed through Dean’s body and he pushed his chest up, moaning as Cas licked and sucked on his nipples. “That feels so good,” he gasped, gently tugging on Cas’ hair.

Cas was pleased he had found another one of Dean’s weaknesses, the sensitivity of his hard nipples. Cas could have played with them all night, rolling the bud gently between his teeth, his tongue caressing them as he slid his hand down the front of Dean’s boxers, stroking him a few times.

Cas hardly had to touch him for Dean to submit completely, but this was a whole other level. Needy, involuntary moans spilled from his lips as he begged for more. “Please...” his voice was a weak, quivering whimper.

Dean's pleas had Cas hard and preleaking. He growled again, reluctantly pulling back and reaching for the mousse. He slipped Deans boxers down so he was completely naked and took it upon himself to coat Deans cock in the cool chocolate. He hummed happily at his work, leaning down and kissing the tip, then slowly lapping up the mousse.

The combination of the cold mousse on his skin with the warmth of Cas’ tongue made his body tremble and he raised his hips, moaning in pure bliss. “Fuck...fuck! How does it taste, Cas?” He panted, his cock twitching.

Cas let out a pleased moan at the question, swallowing down Dean’s cock. His tongue caressed the skin, lapping up the mousse and sucking hard, swallowing the chocolate liquid. His hands squeezed Dean's thighs, relishing in the taste.

Dean bucked his hips, rocking himself forward into Cas’ mouth until his pleasure overcame him. With a loud grunt, he came, spilling between Castiel’s lips. “Mmf...couldn’t help myself,” he breathed, his hips still shaking.

It was unexpected and Cas choked a little, but was inevitably pleased with himself, pulling off as Dean’s cock softened between his lips. "Mm, seemingly so. Didn't realise how sensitive your nipples are." He smirked a little like a kid with a new toy.

“Me neither.” Dean bit his lip, reaching for the mousse container. “Switch places with me,” he requested, sitting up a little.

"Alright." Cas chuckled, slipping off his sweatpants so he was naked for Dean, stretching out on the bed and his bright eyes lifted to meet the rock star’s. He felt such an unspoken level of trust and affection towards Dean.

“Mm.” Dean bit his lip as he sat up, his eyes trailing over Cas. “Don’t know what’s more delicious: you or the mousse.” He smirked, straddling his hips and dipping his finger into the container. He smeared chocolate across Cas’ lips, then leaned down, kissing it off of him.

"I would like to think me, but that mousse really is delectable," he murmured, a smile on his lips as Dean covered them in the frothy chocolate. He let out a relieved sigh as their lips met, melting under his touch. Something about Dean’s kisses always had him weak.

“I think it might be a tie.” Dean chuckled, gently sucking on Cas’ bottom lip before he smeared more mousse down his neck and across his collarbone, dutifully licking up every drop. He shifted his hips to rest along Cas’ thighs so he had his whole chest uncovered, tracing a line of chocolate from the center of his clavicle down his stomach to just above his cock. He cleaned him right up, enjoying every second of it.

It didn't take long for Cas to come completely undone, each moan louder as he squirmed under Dean, his hard cock straining against his stomach, begging to be touched. If Dean kept this up he would come, completely untouched.

Dean couldn’t get enough of the way Cas moaned for him, his lips sucking along the strip of skin he’d just licked over, making a line of hickeys along his abdomen. “Mm...look at you,” he breathed, reaching down to smooth his thumb over the head of his cock as he felt it hard against his stomach.

“Time for my favorite part.” He crawled down between his legs, holding the container beneath Cas’ cock and dipping it directly into the mousse with a small smirk. He set it aside after Cas was completely submerged and ran his tongue along the underside before it dripped onto the sheets.

Cas was flushed, his whole body shaking with pleasure. His eyes were squeezed shut, unable to look at Dean out of fear he would cream himself before he was sucked off. He gripped the sheets, jaw set in desperation. The cool mousse made him whimper, which was quickly followed by a moan, falling apart completely. "Dean-" he cried out, panting heavily.

Dean smirked, licking the mousse off his tip before swallowing him down as far as he could without choking. “Mm...” he hummed around his shaft. Cas always tasted good to him, but this was even better.

"Fuck, Dean- Dean-" he breathed out, his hands moving to brush through Dean’s hair and tugging it.

Dean slipped him out of his mouth, looking up into his eyes to watch the ecstatic expression on his face. “Come for me,” he urged, then sank back down, bobbing his head quickly.

Cas looked down at Dean, his eyes desperate and he cried out, coming into his mouth. He panted heavily, his body shaking as he got lost in a dizzying high of pleasure.

“Mm.” Dean swallowed his release eagerly, then slowly pulled off, looking into his eyes. They were both sticky messes at that point, but he didn’t care; he crawled up on top of Cas and pressed a kiss to his cheek. “You know, I was thinking about doing that to you the whole concert,” he murmured.

"You were?" Cas smiled, a well of warmth and love swell over him.

"Kiss me," he said softly, turning to look at Dean properly, his eyes wide with affection and care.

“Uh huh. That’s what got me through it, hoping I’d get to come here and see you afterwards. Call me cheesy. I don’t care.” Dean chuckled, rolling off of him and laying beside him.

“Don’t have to tell me twice.” He leaned forward and gently cupped Cas’ face, kissing him deeply in a way that said everything words couldn’t.

Cas became lost in the kiss, desperate to draw out every inch of feeling and emotion to know that he wasn't the only one feeling this way. He slowly pulled away, dizzy and content as he wrapped his arms around Dean's shoulders and pulled him close. He had never felt this way before and the words fell out softly before he could stop them. “I love you.”

Dean reared his head beneath Cas’ chin, taking a deep breath to breathe him in, his body engulfed in warmth and lightness. His heart was racing and he clung to Cas, committing this perfect moment to memory so he could look back on it whenever he wasn’t with him.

His eyes widened a little when he heard the words slip from Castiel’s mouth, so faint he almost didn’t catch them. He picked up his head, searching his eyes for a moment. He didn’t want to question it because he didn’t want Cas to take the words back, but he also didn’t know if he could say them in return, despite knowing that he did love him. So he kissed him again, hoping that was answer enough.

Cas wasn't expecting Dean to say it back; he just needed to voice his feelings. He leaned into the kiss, slow and warm. He smiled a little as Dean pulled back, nudging his chin with his nose as he snuggled down into him. He pressed a soft kiss to his neck, their bodies squishing together.

“Mm.” Dean hummed, his lips brushing against the top of his head. He took one of Cas’ legs and slipped it between his, his hand gently trailing over the outside of his thigh. “So how long are you planning on staying in this shitty motel? I don’t wanna have to keep climbing down fire escapes to see you.” He chuckled.

Cas enjoyed this position, it felt warm and intimate. His fingers traced Dean's warm chest slowly. He hadn't told Dean, but he was planning on heading back to the US. It was a lot; this whole thing was like a torpedo and the last thing he wanted was for Dean’s reputation to be ruined. "Dunno," he lied.

“Okay. Well, I guess I don’t care where you stay as long as I can keep seeing you. But we’re leaving tomorrow night. Have you given any more thought about songwriting?” Dean brushed his fingers through his hair. “But until then, you can just be my boyfriend.” He smiled a little after he said that, liking the way it sounded.

"Yeah, a little," he replied, but he really hadn't. He surely wasn't as good as Dean thought, and he felt like he was really just a weight on Dean. He was just caught up in the lust-filled fantasy for now. But surely Dean would get bored. Eventually. 

“Mm. No rush.” Dean closed his eyes. He knew he’d get shit for returning to the hotel the next morning, but the worst that would happen is Meg would get in trouble for losing track of him, which he was perfectly okay with. And he didn’t want to spend the night alone, no matter how uncomfortable the mattress was.

"Should we go take a shower? Even if you do smell like chocolate which is delicious," Cas murmured softly, hugging him tightly for a short moment before relaxing and letting him go.

“Yeah. Is it safe to use the shower here, though?” Dean asked as he sat up, half-joking. He yawned, running his fingers through his hair as he reluctantly climbed out of bed and offered Cas his hand.

"Eh, the water pressure is fine." He chuckled, taking Dean's hand and peeling himself off the bed. "You have to wait for the warm water to kick in, though."

“Okay.” Dean laced their fingers together and walked into the bathroom, switching on the light. He scrunched up his nose as he looked around and hesitantly walked over to turn on the faucet.

"Dean. It's not going to kill you." He swatted Dean's hand away as he turned on the facet, a spider coincidently dropping onto Cas' hand. He remained calm and gently put the spider in the sink before climbing into the tub.

“Oh, gross...come on.” Dean gagged. “You sure they’re not gonna kill me?” He all but leapt into Cas’ arms like a frightened cartoon character.

Cas laughed, catching the frightened Dean as he stumbled into the tub. "You are an idiot, you know that right?" Cas helped him regain his footing.

“I fucking hate spiders, okay?” Dean shook his head, wrapping his arms around Cas’ waist. “Yes, but I’m your idiot, aren’t I?”

"Yes." Cas pressed a kiss to Dean's forehead and ushered him under the water, rinsing his body down with soap to keep Dean distracted. Surely he would stop thinking about spiders if Cas was washing his thighs.

“Mm.” Dean closed his eyes, enjoying Cas’ touch. He moved his hands up to grip his shoulders and smiled a little. “Feels good,” he murmured.

"Like it?" He asked softly, drawing himself to his feet to massage Dean’s waist and chest, scrubbing off the leftover chocolate from his body.

“Mhm.” Dean leaned into his touch, letting out a soft sigh in content. He could almost forget how gross the shower looked. Almost.

Cas slid his hands around to squeeze Dean’s ass. "All done.” he moved forward to nudge Dean’s chin with his nose. "Can you do me?” He asked softly.

“I’d be happy to do you.” Dean smirked a little at his poor joke, taking the soap from Cas and leaning into his touch for a moment before he began to wash down his chest.

Cas smirked, taking his time as he leaned back against the tiles and let out a pleased sigh. His favourite pastime was most definitely giving Dean a shower show.

“Why do you always look so sexy like this?” Dean shook his head, letting his hands greedily slide all over Cas’ chest, then down to his thighs before moving to his back and doing the same. “I mean...you always look sexy. But when you’re in the shower, it's a whole different level.”

"It's a talent, actually. I must say, getting you worked up in the shower is very exciting for me." He flashed Dean a cocky smile, brushing his fingers up through his dark hair and flexing a little, eyes on Dean.

“Fuck. I’m telling you, Cas. You could be a model.”

"Or maybe I should keep all of this just for you," Cas murmured, his fingers teetering up to brush over Deans muscular shoulders, massaging them gently.

When Dean was finished washing him, he slid his hands over Cas’ ass and pressed their chests together. “So much muscle. That’s why I wanted to lick you all over.” He chuckled.

"Mm, that does sound fun, having your tongue all over me..." Cas trailed off. 

“Let’s get out of the shower and maybe I’ll do just that.” Dean grinned. 

Cas chuckled, leaning past Dean to turn off the water. "I have another fun idea, which I think you will enjoy." He grinned, climbing out and reaching for one of the cleaner looking towels to toss to Dean.

“Ooh, I’m intrigued.” Dean couldn’t get out of that shower fast enough, examining the towel carefully before he hesitantly wrapped it around his hips.

Cas didn't bother drying down, squeezing out the ends of his hair to ring it out the best he could, each droplet sliding down over his already wet body that had a slight sheen to it. "How about I touch myself, and if I get off before you touch me, you win, but if you break and give in, I win." He smirked, beckoning Dean to come closer.

“Mm...okay.” Dean bit his lip, walking over to Cas. He knew he wasn’t likely to win this game, but he still wanted to play. “Am I allowed to touch myself? And what’s the winner’s prize?”

"No touching yourself." Cas’ fingers grazed over the top of Dean’s towel slowly. "And if you win, you can pick anything you want. I will do anything you ask," he purred out softly, leaning in to peck Dean's lips.

“You’re on.” Dean grinned, already shuddering as Cas kissed him. This was going to be fun, though he wasn’t sure he could manage to go without touching himself or Cas.

Cas pulled back and made his way to the bed, settling against the headboard and among the pillows. He sat with one leg hanging casually off the bed, the other propped up as he eyed Dean. He started off slowly, his right hand pushing through his wet hair as his left dropped to caress and massage one of his nipples slowly.

Dean climbed into bed and sat opposite him, leaning against the footboard and squeezing his thighs together as he kept his eyes locked on Cas. He already had a slight urge to touch himself and knew he likely wasn’t going to last.

Cas' lips parted just a touch, his long lashes fluttered together a little as a very slight whimper of pleasure fell from his delicious lips. "Hng-"

Dean pulled his bottom lip between his teeth, biting down as he watched the man seated across from him. “Fuck,” he murmured under his breath.

Cas rolled his erect nipple between his thumb and index finger, nice and slow as he massaged it. He slipped his other hand from his hair and used that one to tease his other nipple, grinding his ass a little against the sheets.

Dean wanted to just crawl right over and lick and suck Cas’ nipples for him, but he refrained, his breath catching in his throat as he watched them harden. “Mm...is this how you like to touch yourself usually, or is this just a performance for me?”

"I think if you knew the answer to that, you would ever let me leave your sight. You would think about it all the time.” He slid one hand down his stomach and grasped his cock, letting out a soft gasp as he began to stroke himself, slow and rhythmed, taking his time.

“Mm...pretty sure that’s already the case, sweetheart.” Dean’s eyes trailed slowly down to Cas’ cock. His breathing was nearly as heavy as Cas’ and he shifted, keeping his own steadily swelling cock trapped between his legs, trying to stay as still as possible.

There was that nickname again, the one that made Cas' knees go weak. He tried to not let it disrupt his rhythm. "Well now you can see what it was like for me as your bodyguard. Watching, not able to touch." He slipped his finger over his tip and let out a moan, pressing his head back into the headboard.

Dean nodded slowly. “Guess it serves me right. But fuck...I wanted you to touch me so badly.” He squirmed a little. “Ever since I first met you...all I could think about were how your pretty lips would look wrapped around my cock. Never thought I’d actually get to. Thought you hated me. And I kinda hated you too...until I realized it was really just sexual tension, not hate at all.” He chuckled.

"I felt the same way, and I'm so glad I did. Got to feel your cock. How could I forget one of my favorite lays? Your big cock fucking into me." Cas whimpered.

“One of your favorites?” Dean raised an eyebrow. “Guess I’ll have to do better then to reach that top spot.” He shifted again. “You gonna let me win, Cas? You gonna come?”

Cas smirked a little and shook his head. "Come on Dean, what would you do if you won?" He asked breathlessly, sitting up on his knees but he didn’t break his rhythm. “Is it worth not touching me right now?"

“If I told you, you’d probably lose immediately.” Dean chuckled. “You sure you wanna risk that?” He bit his lip, leaning forward a little, almost challengingly.

Cas chewed on his bottom lip, grunting a little as he slowed his hand just a touch so he didn't come right then and there. "Tell me," he breathed out, deciding to risk it.

Dean leaned back on his palms as he spoke, his eyes trained on Cas. “I brought the handcuffs with me. Couldn’t fit the paddle in my pocket, sadly, but I would’ve brought it too. I’d want you to handcuff me to the bed, then sit between my legs. Then, you’d grasp your cock and slowly brush the head at a torturously slow pace along my shaft until I come all over you. Then I’d want you to uncuff me and grab me by my hair and shove me down until I’ve licked you clean.”

"Fuck! Fuck-" Well, turned out Dean was right, because it was suddenly like Cas had no control over his body and he stroked faster and faster, Dean’s words ringing in his ears until he came, hard.

A smirk spread across Dean’s lips as he realized he’d won. “You made a dangerous choice, Novak.” He crawled over to him, clicking his tongue. “Look at the mess you’ve made.”

Cas shook a little, pouting a touch at Dean’s comment. _Dammit_ , he had challenged Dean and he hadn't even won. "Not my fault." He sulked a little at getting beaten.

“Mm.” Dean leaned forward and kissed him gently. “But now you get to torture me a little, so I think this worked out in your favor. But just out of curiosity, what would you have done if you won?”

"Well now you will never know." He chuckled lightly, wiping a little cum from his own stomach and sweeping it across his lips. "Mm. Now give me those handcuffs and lay down."

“Fuck. That’s not fair. I won.” Dean shuddered a little as he watched Cas, getting up and walking over to retrieve his jacket. He unzipped the pocket and pulled out the cuffs, tossing them over to him before crawling back into bed and making himself as comfortable as he could.

"Well then winner, lose that towel and lift your arms for me.” He grinned, turning to face Dean properly as he caught the cuffs and swung them between his fingers.

“Yessir.” Dean untied the small knot he’d made around his waist with the towel and tossed it to the ground. Watching Cas hold the cuffs like that was enough to make his cock leak and he was afraid of finishing too soon. He had to breathe.

"Good boy." He easily switched to Dom mode, a fluid motion as he grabbed Dean's thighs and pulled him down, making a show of handcuffing Dean’s arms to the bed and making sure he could pull them off. He grinned, settling between Dean’s legs. "Do you know how lonely it is to come while someone watches? The torture of the build up with no release?" He smirked, slapping the inside of Dean’s thighs.

Dean held his breath for a moment, trying to quell his excitement. But with the praise and commanding demeanor Cas has now taken on, it was nearly impossible. He let his arms go limp, squeezing his hands into fists, then relaxing them as he was cuffed to the headboard. The slap to his thighs made him shiver and his eyes trailed slowly down Cas’ body as he got close.

“Mm...y-yes,” he murmured, hardly able to speak.

"You do, don't you? You are such a little cock slut aren't you?" He asked, but it was more of a statement than a question as he lightly brushed his fingers over Dean’s hard cock.

“Yes...I am...” Dean leaned his head back against the bed, taking another deep breath. His cock gave an involuntary twitch when Cas touched him and he let out a soft gasp. “Cas...please. I’m gonna come before you do anything.”

"Well that would prove you are a little slut for me, wouldn't it, Dean?" He breathed out, his hardened gaze on Dean as he slid his own already half-hard cock over the rock star’s slowly, grinding them together.

“You’re damned right I am.” Dean gritted his teeth as soon as he felt Cas brush against him and he arched his back, clenching and trying to keep himself from finishing so he could enjoy as much as he could. “Fuck! Fuck...Cas. Oh my god...”

"All mine." He growled, leaning down to nibble and bite at Dean’s earlobe, moving his hips at an excruciatingly slow pace. His tongue slid over the shell of his ear with a pleased hum.

“Mmmf...yours,” Dean confirmed, jutting his hips out and silently pleading for Cas to move faster. He hoped he’d have mercy, but Dean had requested torturously slow. He regretted that now.

"No, no darling, you don't get that privilege." He grabbed Dean's hips and forced him against the mattress. He then sat back to look at him properly, rocking his cock at the same torturous pace. 

“Fuck!” Dean couldn’t take it anymore. The minute Cas pushed his hips down, he exploded, coating his cock in cum. His chest heaved and his head drooped to the side. “That’s...what you do to me,” he panted, his body going limp.

Cas grinned, leaning down to lick up the heated cum that spilled over Deans stomach. He took his time, rubbing his thighs gently as he licked him clean.

Dean’s chest heaved, glancing down to watch Cas clean him up with his lip sucked in between his teeth. He was a mess, expletives spilling from his lips as he struggled to catch his breath.

Cas finished, leaning up to gently pick the lock on Dean’s handcuffs and they fell off in a clatter. He moved to lay beside Dean properly, his fingers gently combing through his dark hair.

“Mm.” Dean smiled, rotating his wrists a few times before he held his arms out for Cas. “That was...fucking amazing...” he breathed.

Cas was beaming, elated. He was so glad that he could experience this with Dean; it felt like he had given himself entirely over to Cas, which made him flattered and flustered as he snuggled down next to Dean.

Dean closed his eyes, pulling Cas close. “Tonight was fun. Thank you.” He kissed his cheek, gently stroking his hair. “Mm.”

"I'm glad you found it fun." He smiled a touch, leaning in to press a soft peck to Deans head. "Are you heading back, or staying here tonight?" He asked softly.

Dean let out a soft sigh. “I probably should head back, but I really don’t want to. Besides, what’re they gonna do, fire the security guard who let me escape? That’d be Meg.”

Cas just let out a very soft hum, not saying anything. He was becoming lost in thought again, rolling Dean close and brushing his fingers slowly down his spine as he pressed a gentle kiss to his forehead.

“But I have the day off tomorrow. As long as I catch my flight on time...so maybe we could go sight-seeing together if you’d be up for it?”

"Yes Dean, whatever you would like," he murmured, brushing his hand from his spine up through his mess of brown hair, his nose pressed into Dean’s hairline

“Mm, good.” Dean smiled, simply enjoying Cas’ touch. “We should sleep,” he murmured.

"Mm, you have had a long day." He didn’t close his eyes, but he leaned over and turned the light off in hopes that Dean could get some much needed rest.

“Uh huh.” Dean let out a yawn. “You’re still gonna be here when I wake up, right?” He asked, that fear still present in his mind as he curled closer to Cas, comfortable despite the quality of the end.

"I promise i will be here when you wake up." He cuddled Dean close. He tucked them both under the blankets, going back to the gentle pets along his spine.

With that promise, Dean was able to completely relax. He melted against Cas’ touch and soon drifted off into a light, peaceful sleep, his face pressed into Cas’ shoulder.

Even after Dean fell asleep, Cas couldn't bring himself to. He was tired of thinking, and overthinking. His fingers tightened on Dean’s back for a moment, letting his mind fall empty. That was when when words started to trickle in, a tune he couldn't quite place yet beginning to play to a beat in his mind. He wanted to write it down so he wouldn't forget, but with his journal destroyed, he sat up a little and fumbled for a pencil and notepad from the drawer. Squinting through the dark, he was able to harmonize a bridge of lyrics.

_A secret kiss pressed to famous lips when the public’s looking away._

_Only when the doors are closed, can we finally be free._

_No one understands and no one approves of us._

_But I believe they can someday._

_Climb out the window and jump into my arms._

_These flowers may be wilted but they’re a piece of your heart._

_And you give it, raw and bleeding, to me._

_Your touch opened up my body and your words opened my soul._

_I know now that with you I want to grow old._

_And if our love were ever to be known, I’d rather it be known in infamy than never at all._

He found himself doodling around the spun-out lyrics and before he could tuck the paper away, he fell asleep, the piece of paper clutched in his hand.


	19. When in Rome

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Song lyric credits - All Our Own by Radio Company

Dean slept easily through the night, blinking his eyes open when the sun was high in the sky, seeping through the cracked, dirty blinds of the motel room. He grunted, but smiled a little when he could feel Cas’ body still against his and he shifted, lifting his head up and kissing him softly.

Cas murmured a little as Dean kissed him, scooting forward and tucking his head into his shoulder, letting out a breathy sigh as he fell back asleep. 

Now it was Dean’s turn to hold him, stretching a little before wrapping his arms back around him and staying there for another hour or so.

When Cas finally stirred, he rolled over and grunted as the pencil jabbed into his side. He swatted off the bed, sitting up a little more and nuzzling into Dean gently. "Morning,” he muttered, opening his eyes slowly and squinting up at him.

Dean smiled upon hearing Cas’ voice and he sat up, his eyes falling on a slightly crumpled piece of paper lying on the mattress beside them. “Hey, what’s this?” He asked, picking it up and unfolding it .

It took a second for it to even click that Dean had spoken and when he finally did, Cas' cheeks flushed and he was now fully awake, reaching for the paper urgently. "Just...something I'm writing. Give it."

“No.” Dean held it up so he couldn’t reach it. “I wanna see.” He brought it back down to eye level, skimming across the words, a wide smile spreading across his face. “Did you do this last night?”

"Uh, yeah. I felt a little inspired, is all," Cas muttered, his blush crawling up over his cheeks. God, he felt like a love sick idiot. And the writing on the motel paper was just more evidence of his feelings so clearly splayed out for Dean.

Dean set it down on the nightstand and pulled Cas into his arms, lightly grasping his chin and turning his head until their lips met. “It’s beautiful,” he murmured against his lips. “I’m telling you. You’re fucking talented.”

Cas was a little surprised, but ultimately relieved that Dean didn't laugh or feel a little creeped out by the lyrics. He smiled a little. "Thanks, Dean." Cas gently gripped the bedsheets, leaning into Dean's hands. They were so warm and comforting.

“Mm.” Dean stroked his hand down Cas’ cheek. He sang softly. _ “In a world we can call our own. You'll find shelter darlin' Where I'll always promise to...Never let it be.” _ Smiling a little, he pulled back, afraid to look at his phone and all the missed calls he probably had. His whole security team probably thought he was dead.

Goosebumps tingled over Cas' skin and his heart fluttered and tripped over itself. It was so pretty, and Dean's voice almost made him swoon. "Do I get my own private morning sing-along?"

“That depends...” Dean smirked a little and climbed out of bed, offering his hand. “Will you dance with me?”

Cas laughed, rolling off the bed and grabbing his boxers, then pulling them on. He raised his eyebrows expectantly. 

“Oh...you’re gonna make me put on underwear for this, are you?” Dean sighed and pulled back to slip his own boxers on.

"Yeah, ‘cause if our penises touch while we dance, it's a little gay, don't you think?" Cas' eyes creased slightly with amusement.

“Oh, we wouldn’t want that now, would we?” Dean snorted, one of his hands slipping down to Cas’ ass and squeezing before sliding to his waist. 

"I'm giving you fair warning, I'm not a good dancer.” Cas took Dean’s hand and squeezed. 

“That’s bullshit. You just have to hold onto me and sway. No skill required. Here. Put your arms around my neck. I’ll lead. It’s easy. When I step back, you step forward. And vice versa.”

“alright, alright. I’ll try.” Cas moved closer and wrapped his arms around Dean’s neck, looking slightly up at him for guidance.

Dean started off slowly, pulling him closer with each step forward, getting him used to the movements before he grabbed his phone and played an instrumental version of his song, ignoring all the missed calls and messages. That was a later problem. 

Cas laughed again, genuinely happy. He didn't seem to mind the fact he felt stupid while swaying to the music; he trusted that Dean would guide him. He leaned a little closer, resting his head on Dean's shoulder.

“There you go.” Dean grinned. “Mm...yeah, if we were naked right now, our penises would definitely be touching.” He laughed a little, reaching a hand up to gently stroke his hair as he started to sing.

_ “Listened to yesterday. Long before the way it has become. And it all came down to you. I don’t really know the way. Played out stranger than it seemed. But what went down came true, like an all day dream.” _

Cas grinned at Dean’s joke, squeezing him a little as he listened intently. It was so soothing; he really did love Dean's voice. It was like a warm blanket on a cold day and he was unsure if he would ever get enough of it.

_ “I don't want to be the one to say it's wrong. When the heavens open and a new day comes along. I know I would rather be together alone. In a big top circle and a world we can call our own. It's all our own,” _ Dean continued. 

“I’m gonna try a spin,” he murmured during the instrumental break. He pulled back and took Cas’ hand, raising his arm above their heads. “Just turn.”

Cas felt like a giddy teenager dancing with his crush. He couldn't stop smiling, happily spinning like Dean instructed, stumbling a little but inevitably grabbing Dean's face and pulling him into a gentle kiss when he completed the turn. It was loving and tender, no urgency behind it.

Dean grinned as Cas returned to his arms and he held him close, kissing him back. So this was what being in love felt like. He understood all the sappy lyrics now.

Cas pulled back as the song ended, his thumbs brushing over Dean’s cheekbones, his voice soft. "You should go back. Let them know you are okay."

Dean sighed. “I’ll just call. If I go back, they won’t let me leave again without a babysitter.” He sat back on the edge of the bed and grabbed his phone again, reluctantly swiping through all the missed calls. 

"Dean, they are there for your safety is all. They are just doing their job," Cas replied softly, taking a seat beside him.

“Sure, like Meg gives a shit about my safety.” Dean shook his head, sliding his hand over Cas’ thigh as he called the number that’d tried him so many times.

Cas squeezed his wrist gently, leaning his head on his shoulder.

"Dean! Where the fuck are you?" Meg hissed into the phone.

“I’m alive. Isn’t that good enough for you?” Dean smirked a little. “Don’t worry about me. I’m in good hands and I’ll be back in time to catch my flight tonight.”

"You fucking better be or I’m chaining your ass to your hotel bed when we land in Ireland." She growled before hanging up.

“Ooh...that might be a bit too kinky for my tastes, I’m afraid.” Dean had a shit-eating grin on his face as she hung up and he tossed his phone onto the bed.

“You wanna grab some brunch?” 

Cas leaned up and pressed a soft kiss to his jawline. He felt that he was responsible. He was always getting Dean in trouble, holding him back. Waning his attention from fans; why? So he could get laid? Dean was just... in lust with Cas. He would get over it eventually. 

"Sure. Sounds lovely," he answered, Dean’s question pulling him out of his thoughts.

“Mm.” Dean tilted his head back. “Sure that’s not too gay for you?” He teased, giving his cheek a soft pat before he stood up to get dressed. He’d have to wear the same clothes as the night before, but he’d survive. At least he’d changed after the party.

"Unless we touch dicks while we do it, shouldn’t be too gay." Cas got up. "I'm going to go get dressed; will be back soon." He pressed a kiss to Dean’s cheek before heading to the bathroom.

“You sure weren’t complaining about that last night,” Dean muttered as he watched Cas get up. He looked around for his clothes, finding them a little crumpled on the floor, but at least they smelled fine. He slid on his jeans, then flannel and waited for Cas.

Cas came back out, dressed in jeans and a denim jacket, a black v neck and work boots. He smiled gently, his hair tousled. "ready to go?"

Dean’s eyes slowly trailed over Cas and he nodded. “Yeah. Damn, my date looks good.” He walked over, running his hand down the edge of his jacket.

"Keep that up, Dean, and we aren’t ever leaving this motel room," he replied playfully, brushing his hand over Dean’s.

“Can’t help myself when you look this damn good.” Dean tugged on the collar of his jacket and brought him closer to kiss him. “Mm. Imagine how good you’d look if you let me dress you sometime.” He grinned.

"I am not a barbie doll, Dean." He scoffed, squeezing his waist gently before reluctantly letting go.“Oh, I know. You’ve got all your parts.” Dean chuckled.

"Did you have a place in mind for Brunch?" Cas asked, hoping to sway the conversation back to leaving the motel.

“Yeah, I know of a place not far from my hotel. It’s called Marigold, but it looks packed, so I may have to pull a few strings to get in.” He started toward the door, refraining from taking Cas’ hand.

"Wait, did you bring your cap and sunglasses with you?" Cas asked, tucking his hands into his jacket.

Dean nodded, taking his sunglasses out of his jacket pocket and slipping them on. “Hat’s...somewhere. I definitely had it on when I came here.” He sighed as he walked over to the bed and found it had slid underneath. Groaning a little, he stretched his arm out and retrieved it, blowing off the dust with a slightly disgusted face before he put it on.

“Okay. Let’s go.”

"Drama queen." Cas chuckled, stepping out of the motel and stretching out his arms. It was one of the warmer days he had had here in Rome and he was thankful for it. "Lead the way."

“Please, you love it.” Dean tilted his cap down, glad that it was sunny out so he didn’t look so abnormal wearing sunglasses. He slid his hands into the pockets of his jeans and started down the end of the block, excited to get as far away from that seedy motel room as possible.

Even in a hat and sunglasses, it was obvious that Dean was famous. The way he walked, the higher end clothes; people couldn't help but stare. "Have you been to Rome before?" Cas asked offhandedly

“Yeah, actually. It’s how I sort of know my way around. It’s a more popular tour spot, and I’ve requested the most days off here when possible because I really just love the city. I’d like to explore more of Italy sometime, though. But I guess I say that about most of Europe.” Dean smiled, aware of the people staring at him, but not really caring. He was used to it.

Cas bobbed his head, a smile on his face. He leaned a little closer as he was about to respond, when his eyes fell onto a group of three girls who hurried over to them. He took a small step away casually, the girls squealing and asking for a selfie with Dean. 

“Ah, sure. What the hell?” Dean removed his hat and sunglasses for a moment, putting his arms around the girls and smiling for a quick picture. He was kind to his fans as long as they showed him the same kindness in return. They were the reason he had any success, after all.

They seemed so happy, one of the girls turning to look at Cas. "Ah, Mr. Dean, who is this, uh, how you say, friend?" She smiled warmly at Cas, who was surprised that he was even acknowledged at all.

Dean smiled a little. Their accents were adorable. “He’s my bodyguard,” he replied easily. “You ladies have a nice day now, okay? Ciao.”

They gave another glance at both of them before hurrying off, thanking them again. Cas tucked his hands into his pockets, watching them walk away. 

“Wow. The fans here are much nicer than London. This is why I like Rome.” Dean fell back in stride beside Cas. “You think they bought it?”

"That I'm just your bodyguard?" He half shrugged. "Sounded convincing and they honestly have no reason to think any other way.”

“Okay, good.” Dean nodded a little. “It’s just...we have to be careful. One slip up and we’ll be plastered all over the tabloids. I want to make our relationship public on our own terms, whenever we’re both comfortable with that, and not have the media out us before we can do that.”

"Dean, I’m not stupid, I know," he said firmly, needing a second to think. It was hard. And he knew why it had to be that way. "Look, I know how these things work. I know how to behave." His voice softened a little around the edges. 

“I know. I didn’t say you were stupid. I just...wanna make sure we’re on the same page.” Dean sighed. “I’ve never had to do this before, and a ton of people already think Jo is my girlfriend thanks to what happened in Paris. Don’t get why anyone gives a shit about my love life. It’s annoying.”

"You are famous, Dean, it's just part of the package. And look, those girls thought I was just your security guard. Let's just, enjoy brunch okay?"

“I know, I know.” Dean sighed, turning the corner and coming upon the restaurant he’d picked out. There was a line practically out the door. “And now’s the time to use the perks of being famous.” He tugged the door open, ignoring the angry protests from all the people he’d walked in front of.

Cas hurried behind Dean, trying to ignore all the angry protests and glares of the other patrons. The hostess ran up to him, trying to turn him away. "Sir, you can't--- oh." It suddenly clicked in her brain who was. "Oh! Apologies, Mr. Winchester. There is a VIP table for you; we will escort you there." She snapped her fingers and a sharply-dressed waiter hurried up with a warming smile, gesturing for them to follow him.

“No problem, Ma’am. Thank you.” Dean removed his sunglasses and winked at Cas as they were led over to their table. It didn’t work every time. Mostly it was just luck. But since the world knew he was in Rome at the moment, well-renowned restaurants kept their eyes out for him. He took a seat adjacent to Cas at a four-top table and ignored all the eyes on him.

Luckily they were tucked at the back of the restaurant, with street view and high windows. Cas thanked the waiter as menus were handed to them, his eyes falling to the long list of food.

Dean grinned, peering over the top of the menu to glance at Cas. “Ooh...they’ve got mimosas. How hungry are you?”

"Maybe alcohol won't be such a good idea before your flight," he warned. “Well, I skipped dinner last night, so I'm starving.

“You’re no fun.” Dean shook his head. “We’re ordering a feast then. Eggs, toast, meat platter, cheese board. Whatever you want.”

"Trying to fatten me up?" Cas chuckled, closing the menu and nudging it to the side. Dean had made their mind up and he was happy with it.

“No, just trying to help you enjoy the finer things in life a little. After that motel room...you’ve made it clear you need my guidance.” Dean chuckled with him. “And I’m getting a mimosa. Just one. And I have all day to let it leave my system.”

“I don’t need guidance, Dean. My taste is poor because I am. I have never had...this.” He gestured to the restaurant, his smile soft. He was used to it. Used to a poor lifestyle. 

“Well, now you do. And I don’t want any arguments about this. I’ve never had anyone to spoil before. I wanna spoil you a bit.” Dean ordered their large brunch when the waiter walked over and collected their menus.

“I won’t argue,” he promised. It was their last day anyway; why not indulge Dean a little? He smiles, feeling his phone buzz in his pocket. He reached in and tugged it out, unlocking it and opening Twitter. Huh, he had forgotten to turn off notifications for when people mentioned Dean in their tweets. This one was from one of the girls they’d just met outside. 

_ Omg! Ran into Dean today in Rome! Cosí Cosí caldo <3 _

He scrolled down a little to look at the comments as he told Dean, “those girls you ran in to uploaded the photos. They look cute. Even got some blurry ones of you walking.” He chuckled.

“Oh, really? Let me see.” Dean glanced over at Cas’ phone and smiled a little, then pulled out his own phone. “I’ll like the tweet. It’ll make ‘em freak out.” He found the girl’s account on his own page and liked it, commenting a heart emoji. “That should keep them busy a while.”

Cas hummed in agreement, but he was lost in the comments section. _ So cute, omg you are so lucky!  _ was the majority of the comments, but there were a few asking who the guy with Dean was. They argued about him being a security guard but he wasn’t in the uniform. Regardless, it was just a few people and it shouldn't be too big of a deal. He tucked his phone away, trying to ignore it.

“Hey, don’t get swept up in that shit, alright? I know it’s easy to get lost looking at all the things people are posting, but it gets unhealthy.” They were sitting far away enough from everyone that Dean dared placing his hand on Cas’ thigh for a brief moment and squeezing.

Cas reached his hand under the table and brushed his hand over Dean’s. “I know. I was just curious.” He nodded a little, giving Dean a very gentle smile as he took a sip of the water. “What time do I need to make sure you are on the plane? Just want to make sure I don’t steal too much of your time today.”

Dean glanced down at their hands, smiling a little. “Uh...we’ve gotta be there by like, 8. So we should head back to my hotel room by 7 to pack and get things ready.”

“Perhaps, although you like to get there ridiculously late, we should head back at five. Give Meg a little peace of mind.”

“Meg doesn’t deserve peace of mind. But fine. How about 4:30 and we use that extra half hour to fuck?” Dean cleared his throat as the waiter came by with their drinks. He’d ordered two mimosas.

Cas didn’t need to say yes; Dean knew what his answer would be. Especially when the heated intensity of his eyes fell on Dean, all but eye-fucking him on the table for a brief moment before he broke the eye contact to smile innocently at the waiter, thanking him.

Dean smirked, licking his lips as he picked up his wine glass and took a sip. “Mm...pretty sure this orange juice is freshly-squeezed.” He sat back in his seat, his eyes devouring Cas like he was the first course of their brunch.

Cas leaned forward just a touch, brows slightly raised as his lips pulled into a secretive smirk, his eyes dark as he was again sucked into Dean’s gaze. “You know, last time you looked at me like that we had some pretty rough sex.” His voice was soft, inaudible elsewhere. “That limo of yours would come in handy right now.”

“Yeah, it sure would.” Dean unfolded a napkin and slid it onto Cas’ lap. “How quiet can you be?” He scooted closer, his knee lightly brushing against Cas’.

“Hm? Oh, quiet,” he murmured, wishing he could throw Dean down onto the carpet and do him right there. But, unfortunately society had rules.

“Good.” Dean slid his hand beneath the napkin, tugging down the zipper of Cas’ pants and slipping his hand into the gap.

Cas just about died, his thighs pressing together as he looked over at Dean desperately. “Dean, don’t-” he breathed out heatedly, his fingers gripping at the side of the table. But god, he didn’t want him to stop. He wanted to touch him, to brush his fingers through his hair and tug, and listen to him moan. _ Fuck, _ he could imagine it.

“Mm. Don’t worry. We’re far enough away from everyone that no one can see. As long as you don’t make noise.” Dean reached into the slit of his underwear, brushing his fingers lightly along his shaft. “But I’ll stop if you really don’t want it.”

His knees jumped a little, hitting the underside of the table. He quickly glanced around, jaw clenched, thighs trembling with want. He leaned a little closer, eyes on Dean. "Or, you could let me fuck you in the bathroom," he suggested. 

“Wouldn’t that look too suspicious?” Dean asked, his fingers curling around his cock and slipping it out from his boxers. “Both of us heading into the bathroom together? And it echoes morein there.”

Cas couldn't think; his brain was zeroed in on  _ DEAN TOUCHING DICK _ which made him feel all kinds of dumb. “Fuck, I don't know,” he choked out. 

“Mm. This really excites you, doesn’t it?” Dean asked with a small smirk as he started to pump him. With his other hand, he reached for his glass and sipped, pretending like everything was normal.

Cas didn’t say anything; he just made some kind of noise, burying his face in his hands as he struggled to breath normally. He wasn't going to last.

Dean slid his fork off the table. “Whoops, my bad,” he declared as he climbed down to retrieve it. While he was under the table, he quickly slipped Cas’ cock into his mouth, his heart racing with adrenaline.

Cas covered his mouth with one hand, resting his head on his palm as his body quivered, Dean's hot mouth not making it any easier to stay quiet. He clenched his ass and scooted forward on the chair, coming deep inside Dean’s mouth with a sigh of relief.

Dean promptly swallowed everything Cas had to offer, then slowly climbed back up, the fork in his hand. “Ah, there it is.” He smirked at Cas, licking a stray drop of cum off the corner of his lips. “Mm.” 

Cas’ eyes were half-lidded and he was panting heavily and sweating profusely. His legs shook a little, eyes on Dean. “Fuck. Did you want me to return the favor? No one would notice if I was missing," he breathed out, wanting so badly to give Dean what he’d just received.

“Don’t know if I can be as quiet as you, but I’m not gonna say no.” Dean shifted a little. Public sex was a big kink for him and he thought he might’ve just discovered that it was one of Cas’ too.

Cas nodded, nothing else on his mind. He just wanted to service Dean, to feel him hot and pulsing in his mouth. He glanced around to make sure no one was watching as he obediently slid under the table to kneel in front of Dean. For springing this on him, Cas was going to torture him. He leaned forward, his teeth grazing over Dean's clothed cock, sucking and rubbing it through the rough fabric.

Dean shifted in his seat, biting his lip as he could already feel the heat from Cas’ mouth through his jeans.  _ Fuck _ , he thought. He knew he was in trouble already.

Cas was quiet, unzipping Dean’s pants and pulling him out through the zipper carefully. His tongue caressed the soft, velvet tip, slipping it between his lips and biting back the urge to moan as he swallowed Dean down.

Dean sucked in a breath, biting down hard on his lip to keep quiet. Cas felt so good around him and he knew the man knew exactly what he was doing.

Cas slid his hands up Dean’s thighs, his tongue caressing expertly along the every vein and ridge, his body alive with excitement.

The meal spread was brought to their table, their main waiter beaming at Dean. "Do you require anything else, sir?" He asked.

Dean’s eyes practically bulged out of their sockets when he saw the waiters coming and he gently nudged Cas with his foot, taking a drink as the food was brought over to distract himself.

“No. Uh...mmm! I’m good...Uhh...thanks.” Dean forced a smile, trying to control himself but it was nearly impossible.

Cas seemed to take the opportunity as karma and while he slowed his ministrations, he didn't stop.

The waiter gave Dean an odd look but simply waved it off as he bowed his head and they all promptly left. 

“Fuck you,” Dean grumbled under his breath, sliding the plates over to himself on the table and starting to eat. He hoped it’d help distract him from Cas a little, and he could pretend he was simply very enthusiastic about the food.

Cas grinned from under the table, more than happy to take the insult as he massaged Dean expertly with his mouth. He ran his fingers over Dean’s thighs affectionately as he resumed working over him.

Dean let out a sigh. He couldn’t actually be mad at Cas, as painful as this situation was. He shoved half a piece of avocado toast into his mouth, letting out as loud a moan as he could without turning too many heads, and spilled into Cas’ mouth.

Cas swallowed it down without skipping a beat, taking his time to tuck him away and zip his pants back up.

He climbed out from under the table, licking his lips and throwing Dean a sultry look as he settled back in his chair. He certainly had discovered a new kink. 

Dean let out a deep breath, shaking his head at Cas. “Eat your fucking brunch, you ass,” he told him, his voice playful. 

Cas gave Dean a shit-eating grin, happy as he flattened out his hair and picked up a cheese cube and pushed it into his mouth. "You love it." 

“You should be proud of me. It’s a damn miracle I kept quiet with your tongue doing all that.” Dean shook his head again. “Fuck, Cas. I’m so getting you back for that later.”

"Mm, I’m looking forward to it." He grinned again, proud of himself. It was so worth it, especially to be rewarded with Dean’s cum filling his mouth. "Alright, what should I try first?" He asked, looking over the selection.

“Mm...wrap a cube of cheese in the prosciutto. It’s really good. Can’t go wrong here.” Dean nudged Cas’ foot affectionately.

Cas gently nudged his foot back, unable to stop smiling as he followed Dean’s instructions. He popped it into his mouth, a soft groan leaving his lips. "Good," he breathed out around the food.

“Everything’s delicious. That’s why it was easy to pretend I was moaning about the food.” Dean winked, taking a bite of eggs and some sausage.

Cas laughed. "I’m proud of you for not moaning as much as you usually do. We would have been kicked out before I even started," he teased, trying something else. It was all so good, far from the usually bland, greasy food he was used to 

“Uh huh.” Dean smirked. “You’d better fuel up, cowboy. Plenty of exercise today. Both walking and...otherwise.” He had no shame in stuffing his face.

Cas shook his head in amusement; it was like an inmate tasting freedom for the first time the way Dean was shamelessly eating. "You know I'm not going to steal your food, right?"

“Mm...what do you mean? There’s enough food here for five people.” Dean chuckled, starting to feel full, but not wanting to stop eating all the delicious food.

"Oh I know, but I still stand by the fact that you eat like a prison inmate. It's adorable." Cas smiled, picking at the bread.

Dean shrugged. “I like food. And if this was gonna be my last meal on death row...I’d be totally fine with that.” He finally gave up and pushed the plates aside, not wanting to have to unbutton his jeans to be able to sit comfortably, though he was tempted to.

"We should take some of this back to the hotel; saves them throwing it out. And you can eat it later," Cas said, finishing off his bread and deciding he was also done.

“I guess. I can use it for a snack on the plane or something. Or you could take it,” Dean suggested. 

“And what am I going to do with all this food?” 

“Eat it.” 

Cas rolled his eyes. “Dumbass. Keep it.”

“Fine, fine.” Dean took out his wallet and paid their bill with his credit card. “You know what I love about Europe? You don’t have to calculate the tip.”

"Hm? Oh! Yes. That is true.” Cas bobbed his head in agreement, smiling warmly at Dean. "Alright tour guide, where to next? "

Dean took the bag of leftovers and stood, placing a hand on his stomach for a moment. “Whew. I’m full. We’ll have to call a car, but I wanna take you to the Tiber river. It’s prettiest at night, but it’s not so bad in the daylight either.”

Cas nodded, his smile bright. "Sure, sounds good. Would you like me to call a cab or do you want to call your driver?" He asked.

“I’ll call the driver.” Dean put his hat and sunglasses back on as he headed outside, handing Cas the bag of leftovers as he requested his driver to meet them across the street from the restaurant.

Cas liked to wander. So even though the social protocol was clear, get up and leave, he instead got up and went to go look at the paintings on the wall. Mostly out of curiosity. The art wasn't necessarily pretty by any means but it caught Cas’ interest.

Dean waited outside until his limo had arrived. He looked around for Cas, spotting him still inside the restaurant and he chuckled, trying to wave him out as he crossed the street and climbed into the back.

Cas looked up, drawing his attention outside. He beamed at Dean, hurrying out. He thanked the hostess again as he rushed past, crossing the street and sliding into the car beside Dean.

“You’re adorable.” Dean laughed as he watched him get in the car. “It’s kind of a long drive, but I promise it’ll be worth it. This is one of my favorite spots to go.”

"I don't mind. The ride can be spent doing this instead." Cas smirked, closing the door behind him and grabbing the front of Dean's jacket to pull him in for a kiss, which he had been craving since Dean put his hand down his pants.

“Mm...definitely.” Dean grinned, his hat falling off his head as Cas grabbed and kissed him. It felt good after not being able to touch him like that all throughout brunch. He quickly put his glasses in his pocket before those fell and got lost and straddled Cas’ lap. “Can’t believe we sucked each other off like that in public...” he clicked his tongue, brushing their noses together.

Cas slid his hands along Dean's thighs as he was straddled, his fingers grabbing at his ass and squeezing. "I know. I think I’ve found my new favorite activity," he murmured, nudging Dean’s cheek with his nose.

“Ooh. Mr. Novak, I believe we’ve found one of your kinks.” Dean smirked and kissed him again, cupping his face as he pushed his ass eagerly into his hands.

“You are my kink.” Cas lifted Dean up with ease and laid him onto the back seat, meeting his lips in an intense, romantic kiss. Slow and open-mouthed, lacing his fingers with Dean’s as he hovered over him. There wasn't a lot of room, but he would make do.

Dean melted completely, both from Cas’ words and the way he was being kissed. He squeezed his hands, slipping his tongue into Cas’ mouth and moaning softly. These were the moments he lived for.

Cas’ hands slid down over his body, memorizing every curve. Every touch and the way that Dean tasted. He had never loved someone so much, so entirely before. It was like Dean held his heart in his hand, which was why he hated what he had to do soon. But he knew that if he told Dean, he wouldn’t let him leave. 

“Mmf...Cas,” Dean groaned, raising his hips. Every touch lit his nerves on fire and his back arched a little. Cas hardly had to do anything to make him submit completely, to unravel into a needy, moaning mess for him.

“Are you hot for me again, Dean?” He asked, voice dangerously low as he entertained Dean for a second, dipping his hips down to push against him, their legs intertwined and hips locked. He rolled them slowly, kissing down Dean's jawline and nipping at the curve to his neck, moving lower and lower until he reached his collar. He nudged the fabric aside, sucking and biting, marking Dean as his.

“Fuck...how could I not be?” Dean answered honestly. He let out a low moan when Cas ground against him, a small smile spreading across his lips. “Mm...Cas, that’s kinda gay,” he teased, tilting his head back. He was silenced completely when his neck was sucked and bitten, a slightly louder moan escaping that time.

“What I am going to do to you, is going to be very gay,” he breathed out, slipping his hand between them and under Dean’s shirt. “Do you think I could fuck you here? Or does princess need a donut to sit on for the plane ride if I do?” He teased, brushing his fingers over Dean's nipple. “Because if I can’t, I will just suck on those nipples of yours and make you come that way.”

Dean squirmed, raising his chest as he looked up at Cas breathlessly. He didn’t care what was done to him. He just wanted Cas. “You’re such a prick,” he murmured, reaching up to slide his hand across his cheek. “Mmf. You can do both.”

“I will fuck you in the hotel, then I can have you screaming as loud as I want.” He slid down, grabbing the hem of Dean's shirt pushing it up. He slipped up and licked at Dean's left nipple. Caressing it, teasing it, before inevitably sucking and rolling the bud between his lips.

“Okay.” Dean grunted, his fingers winding through Cas’ dark hair and tugging as he moaned for him. He’d never had someone pay attention to him like this before and he couldn’t get enough. “So what’re you gonna do to me now?” He asked, biting his lip.

“Tease you. Rile you up. Until you are begging for release. And if you are a good boy, I will let you come.” He growled, moving over to his right side and giving all his attention to the bud.

“Cas...fuck. Don’t torture me.” Dean groaned. He was already practically begging, arching against Cas’ touch. He was already going to get him back for the restaurant, but that clearly hadn’t worked in his favor. He couldn’t stop moaning, his hips raising to rock desperately against Cas.

"That's it, baby,” Cas grunted, pushing his hips back down against Dean’s. He slid up, grabbing Dean’s pants and frantically pushing them down, almost tearing them in the process. He yanked his own down, their now bare cocks rubbing together as he continued to suck and bite down Dean's chest.

“Cas, Cas! Holy fuck!” Dean latched onto him, his hips working to grind relentlessly against him, his cock throbbing from contact and every bite to his chest. “Mmmmf. I’m close...”

He would never get tired of Dean crying out his name, and he was sure he would never forget it. His fingers slid over Dean's waist, grasping at his skin. "Come for me, Dean."

Dean came almost on command, his nails clawing down Cas’ back as he cried out, trying not to make too much noise as he spilled onto his cock and along his own stomach. “Fuck...” he gasped.

"Such a good boy, my good boy," Cas murmured comfortingly as Dean came, pressing much softer kisses up his neck and cuddling Dean close as he rode out his high.

Dean wrapped his arms around Cas’ neck, hugging him tightly. “Mm. Fuck...I love the feeling of your cock against mine,” he breathed, reaching up to cup his face and kiss his warm cheek.

"Mm, I do too," Cas agreed, leaning into Dean and cuddling him tightly. He pressed his nose into Dean's shoulder and breathed in his scent.

Dean hooked one of his legs around Cas’ waist. He didn’t care that he was a mess. “Can I help you come too?” He murmured.

Cas reluctantly let go, his smile soft. "No, I would like to save it for later, When I can enjoy you properly." 

“Mm, okay.” Dean smiled back, basking in that post-orgasm glow as he looked up at Cas. “Help me clean up then?” He asked with a small chuckle, knowing he couldn’t very well walk around looking like he was. That’d sure stir the media.

Cas nodded, trailing down Dean’s body to his stomach, his tongue caressing along his skin slowly. He lapped up Deans cum from his abdomen and the tip of his cock slowly, taking his time to enjoy it.

Dean’s eyes fluttered closed and he groaned. Cas’ tongue always felt like heaven against his flushed skin and he found himself melting again.

Cas pulled back when he was satisfied, tucking himself back into his jeans before assisting Dean. He made sure he was all fixed up and presentable, smoothing down his unruly hair. "Done." 

“Mm...thank you.” Dean pressed a slow, tender kiss to his lips before sitting up. “We’ve still got a little time before we get there.” He scooted over and rested his head on his shoulder, closing his eyes.

Cas wrapped his arm casually around Dean's shoulders, squeezing gently as he pressed a very gentle kiss to the top of his head. He resisted the urge to murmur any affections and simply stayed quiet.

Dean reached for his hand, lacing their fingers together and brushing his thumb slowly over his knuckles. “Perfect last day in Rome, huh? And it’s not over yet.”

"Perfect last day indeed," he replied, squeezing Dean's hand and pressing a kiss to his mess of hair. He closed his eyes, relishing the moment.

***

A little while later, the limo stopped in front of a tall bridge and Dean climbed out, the driver remaining silent and asking no questions. He didn’t care what Dean did in his limo as long as he got paid.

Cas climbed out, fixing up his jacket. "You’d better give him a bonus before we go, especially after having to listen to that," he said with a chuckle, his eyes falling on the view. "Woah..."

Dean laughed. “Don’t worry. I’ll handle it on the way back.” He waved as his driver headed off and walked to the edge of the bridge, placing his hand on the ancient railing and staring out at the sparkling blue water beneath them. “Told you...”

Cas approached, a little weary about the height of the bridge and the old, seemingly unstably railing, but he shook it off and moved closer, peering over the edge and letting out an involuntary gasp. It was gorgeous, and bluer than anything Cas had ever seen.

Dean smiled, glancing over at Cas. He wasn’t going to say anything, but the river matched his eyes almost perfectly. “You wanna take a picture with me? We’ve got a beautiful backdrop.”

"Really? Sure." He smiled warmly, trying to somewhat smooth his hair out, but the wind kept messing it back up. He moved closer to Dean, but was careful not to touch just in case.

“Don’t worry about it. No one’s around.” Dean raised the phone up, pushing his chest against Cas’ and snapping the photo.

Cas pulled a half smile, his brow creasing a little as Dean took the photo. When he finished, he leaned up and pressed a kiss to Dean’s lips. Just a gentle peck, before turning back to the view.

Dean grinned, taking a picture of the landscape before sliding his phone back into his pocket. This was the happiest he’d ever been in his life. Happier than any award he’d ever won, concert he’d performed at, celebrity he’d met...nothing compared.

Cas gently reached for Dean's hand, finally glad to be able to touch him even in the simplest ways again. He smiled warmly at Dean, humming softly in satisfaction as he half leaned on him, watching the water move peacefully under them.

Dean laced their fingers together and gently squeezed, enjoying the moment and committing it to memory. “I’m having the driver just go around the block until we’re ready. So take as much time as you need.”

“I could stay here all day with you,” he murmured in reply. “But we should leave soon. As the sun sets more tourists will come.”

Dean nodded. “Maybe we’ll come back someday. When we don’t have to hide it.” He gave his hand another squeeze before calling his driver and having him return.

Cas didn't say anything; he just leaned close and nuzzled his nose closer into Dean's shoulder. He would soak up every ounce of attention that he could.

Dean reached up and glided a hand through his hair, letting out a soft sigh. He tugged him over to the car when it arrived, stopping by the driver’s window and handing him an extra €200 before climbing in.

Cas climbed in the back, checking his watch. Not long left. He scooted over, immediately finding Dean’s hand the second he climbed into the car. "We should go back to the hotel and get you packed." 

Dean nodded. “No worries. It’s not even 4 yet.” He leaned against him, wondering what the sense of urgency seemed to be.

The longer Cas stayed, the harder it would be for him to go. He needed to do it soon. "Says the one who packs like a preschooler. I'm going to have to repack everything." He chuckled softly.

“If it gets in the suitcase, I don’t care that it’s neat.” Dean shrugged, turning to the side and leaning back against Cas’ chest.

Cas ran his fingers through Deans hair gently, combing it out with his fingers. He was lost in a content daze, massaging Deans scalp affectionately.

Dean’s eyes closed and he ended up falling asleep the rest of the way back to the hotel. His hat and sunglasses went back on as he stepped inside, hoping he’d be left alone.

As they turned up to the hotel, Cas was glad that no security guard was waiting. Meg must have stuck to her word and decided that as long as Dean was on the plane, she didn’t care.

Dean headed up the elevator and to his room, glad to see that someone had cleaned it up after the party. He shed his jacket and sunglasses, then his hat and sighed as he looked at his suitcase.

Cas followed dutifully behind and the second they were in the hotel room, he ushered Dean away from his suitcase. "I will pack it. But let's play a game while I do," he offered.

“Mm...you’ve piqued my interest.” Dean smiled and looked over at him expectantly.

"Sit against the headboard," Cas directed. "Let’s see how observant you are. I will tell you a fact about myself, and you guess whether it's true or not. If you get it right, I will take a layer of clothing off." He took Dean’s haphazardly stuffed clothes from the suitcase and shook them out, beginning to organize a refold them.

“Hmm...okay.” Dean leaned back against the headboard. “And I guess I take off a layer if I get it wrong?” He smirked and put his jacket back on.

"Exactly." He smiled, looking over at Dean. "Let's start off easy, shall we?" He mused, laying his clothes neatly into the suitcase. "My full name is Castiel Novak."

“That’s true. I don’t know your middle name though. If you have one.” Dean crossed one of his legs over the other, holding his knee as he watched Cas pack for him. He was grateful.

Cas slid his jacket off and discarded it beside the suitcase. "I finished college," he continued, walking around the room to make sure everything was packed away, nice and neat.

Dean bit his lip. Even though Cas was still fully dressed, watching him remove the jacket was hot. He could get off just by looking at him being normal. “Uh...false.”

Cas nimbly slid the tight black t-shirt from his frame and tossed it aside, leaving him shirtless as he scooped up the last of Dean's clothes and carried them to the suitcase, packing it all away. “I don’t know who my parents are.”

Dean let out a slow breath. He’d seen Cas naked countless times now, but his body never failed to surprise him. His eyes trailed down his chest. “Umm...true?” That was a guess. Cas had never mentioned his parents before. 

Cas slid his belt out of the loop and threw it with the steadily growing pile of his clothes, finishing off and zipping up the suitcase. “My favourite noise you make is when I fuck you into the sheets.” He slipped his shoes off, veering away from something personal to something less heavy..

“True.” Dean chuckled a little. How could Cas manage to get him hard already? He wasn’t anywhere near touching him, and yet…

Cas slowly opened his jeans, gesturing for Dean to come closer. He slipped them off, standing in his boxers, which hardly concealed the fact he was hard; he had been since the limo ride but he was able to hide it rather well.

Dean climbed out of bed and walked over to him, biting his lip as his eyes trailed down to the rise in his boxers. “Mm. Ask me one more question, Cas.”

“That I, Castiel Novak, love you," he said, his eyes refusing to meet Dean’s. His voice was gentle as he grabbed the loops on Dean's jeans and pulled him closer, kissing him before the rock star could respond. The kiss was hungry and desperate as he shed out of his boxers, Cas refusing to break contact as he backed Dean up towards the bed.

“True,” Dean mumbled against his lips, his heart speeding up instantly at those words. He wrapped his arms around Cas and pulled him close, falling back on the bed and bringing Cas on top of him. He wrapped his legs around his waist, breaking the kiss for a second. “My full name is Dean Winchester,” he murmured.

“True,” Cas breathed out, his fingers sliding down Dean's waist affectionately, breaking the kiss to allow him to shed out of his own coat as he pulled Dean to sit up with him.

Dean nodded, keeping his arms wrapped around Cas as he sat up. He trailed kisses slowly down his neck, saying the next statement between each word. “I have a younger brother named Sam.”

Cas tilted his head back, lips dry as he struggled to even out his breathing, eyelids fluttering closed. "True." He licked his lips, swallowing thickly.

“Mm.” Dean reached back, grabbing the hem of his shirt and slipping it off over his head. He immediately returned to kissing his neck, each one light and gentle so he didn’t leave any marks. “I went to public school.”

"False," Cas answered with ease, his fingers dipping down to impatiently tug off Dean’s jeans, wanting to make this count for everything it was. He wanted to draw it out, but he never could with Dean.

“Mhm.” Dean smirked a little, knowing Cas was growing eager and he couldn’t blame him. He finished removing his jeans, his lips trailing up to brush just over his ear. “I’m in love,” he whispered, his voice just barely audible.

Cas faltered, his stomach clenching and he felt a sudden urge to cry. He was a little shaky, but he tried to conceal it the best he could; moving to gently bite and lick at Dean's ear. Was it true? Or was he just caught up in the moment of pleasure?

Dean let out a soft gasp. He couldn’t believe he’d just said that, but he didn’t regret it. He tilted his head back, slipping off his boxers even though Cas didn’t answer. He lay back again, pulling Cas on top of him.

“Please,” he murmured, reaching up to cup his face. “Make love to me.”

Cas met his eyes for a moment, holding Dean's gaze and he couldn't help it as he felt himself becoming overwhelmed, teardrops falling onto Dean's face. He leaned down and met his lips again as every nerve in his body ached. He laced his fingers with Dean’s, his kiss now desperately sad, like he was clinging onto something he would lose.

Dean wasn’t sure what he’d done, but Cas was crying and it made his heart ache. He kissed him deeply, holding him a little tighter as if to say,  _ don’t worry. I’ve got you.  _ He wrapped his legs around his waist, a little confused. But maybe it was happy tears. He felt close to that himself.

Cas slid his hands down Dean’s thighs, gripping at the skin and pushing his hips against Dean’s, hoping to focus on the pleasure rather than his heart shattering.

Dean let out a low breath, raising his hips as he felt Cas begin to move against him. “You don’t have to fuck me right now. Plenty of time for that. We can just do this,” he murmured, grasping at his face to bring him in for another kiss. There was something so urgent about this, so fleeting. But he couldn’t figure out why. 

"I want to, please," he begged, his lips pressed against Dean’s, but it suddenly didn't feel right. Not like the other times. Maybe it was because he knew this would be the last. He pulled back, gently tugging open the drawer beside Dean’s bed to fumble for the lube and condoms.

“Okay.” Dean raised his hips a little, holding his legs open for him. He didn’t know what was wrong, but he was hoping he could get Cas to snap out of it soon.

Cas focused on the condom, lathering it up generously with lube as he slowed his breathing. He leaned down to press his forehead against Dean’s gently. “Tell me if it hurts,” He murmured, pushing into him slowly.

Dean let out a soft gasp. He’d been stretched enough over the past couple of days that he was fine. His legs went around Cas’ waist again and he held onto him, encouraging him to move.

Cas slid his fingers over Dean’s hips gently, rocking slowly inside him. He tried to focus on the pleasure, but that was seeming to be an impossible task. “Do you have it in you to ride me?” He asked softly.

“Huh? Sure.” Dean shifted back, rolling away from Cas and pushing him onto his back. He climbed over, straddling his hips and very slowly sinking back onto his cock. “Oh...fuck,” he groaned, sitting so he was facing him.

This was better, much better. He focused on memorizing Dean’s body, the way it curved as he rocked on top of Cas. His fingers gently scraped at Dean's thighs, compliments spilling from his lips. "You are so incredibly sexy; look at you."

Dean leaned forward, placing his hands on Cas’ chest as he began to bounce onto his cock. He groaned, soaking up the praise. “Fuck. All I’m looking at is you, handsome.” He chuckled lightly.

One of Cas’ hands lifted to caress and stroke Dean’s hard cock. "That's it, gorgeous," He grunted, meeting Dean’s hips halfway. 

“Mm...” Hearing him speak to him like that only made Dean moan more. He pushed his hips up as Cas began to stroke him, crying out into his mouth. He was close, but Cas was his priority.

“Perfect, just like that!” Cas’ voice grew louder and more urgent as his orgasm welled up inside him, his thighs tensing as he held Dean's hips down. He pushed against him harder and faster until he came deep inside Dean, his body shuddering.

Dean arched his back, kissing Cas deeply and heatedly until he couldn’t hold out any longer. He spilled all over his abdomen, crying out. He refused to move for a while after that, clinging to Cas.

Cas cuddled Dean close, pressing a soft kiss to his ear, and resting his forehead on his shoulder. He wrapped an arm around Dean's waist, savoring the moment for as long as possible.

Dean slowly eased off of Cas, letting out a small grunt and settling on top of him. He didn’t want to leave this position, ever.

Cas leaned up and pressed a kiss against Dean's lips, firm and loving as he took every second in. "You should go shower," he murmured, his fingers brushing down Dean’s spine slowly.

“Mm...okay. You gonna come with?” Dean asked, looking up at him with a small, hazy smile. He could hardly pry himself away.

"Yeah, I just have to make a phone call first," Cas replied softly, swallowing thickly as he pulled Dean in for a slow, final kiss. It was never going to be enough. 

“Alright. I’ll try not to use up all the hot water before you get there.” Dean grinned, kissing him back. Once he pulled away, he slid his finger along his abdomen, collecting cum, then brushed it across Cas’ lips. He then reluctantly got up and made a show of walking naked into the bathroom.

Cas didn’t say anything; his eyes just followed Dean and he used every ounce of willpower left not to give in and follow him there. He waited for the door to close and he nimbly got up, slipping off the condom and tossing it. He got dressed hurriedly and grabbed a pen and scrap of hotel paper from the side of the bedside table.

He tried to stay calm, but the overwhelming urge to cry welled up again. He forced himself to swallow it down, but he couldn't stop his vision from blurring as he scribbled out a note for Dean. He placed it carefully on top of the suitcase and took a final glance around before leaving, doing his best to convince himself that this would be the best thing for both of them.


	20. Love Like This

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey everyone,   
> as life becomes hectic again, we will not be able to update this fic as regularly as before, but we promise, this fic will NOT be abandoned, and will be completed, no matter how long it takes. Thanks for hanging in there and for your continued support and feedback. It means a lot!

Dean hummed happily as he stepped into the shower and turned the water on, cleaning himself up and waiting patiently. He wondered who Cas was on the phone with. He was taking a while…

After over twenty minutes, Dean was finished showering and Cas still hadn’t shown. Maybe he’d gotten caught up on the phone and hadn’t realized. He stepped out, wrapping a towel around his waist and drying off. He looked around the room, his frown deepening. Maybe he’d gone outside to make the call, but he couldn’t hear him.

Then he saw the note on his suitcase and his heart plummeted to his stomach. Slowly, he walked over and picked it up. It was short, and simple, but it only took a few words to shatter his heart completely.

_ Dean, _

_ I’m sorry, but we aren’t good for each other. I’m bad for your reputation and the only way I can see our relationship going is south. I think it’s best if we stop seeing each other, and since I’m no longer working for you, I’m going home. I hope you can understand where I’m coming from. _

_ \- Castiel  _

Dean thought he was hallucinating for a moment. This wasn’t real. Cas was...gone? But why? He’d thought things were going so well. He took a seat on the edge of the bed, the paper crinkling in his hand. So that’s why Cas had been rushing them back to the hotel. How long had he been planning this? To just...leave with no explanation? If Cas had only shared those concerns with him, he could’ve put his mind at ease, convinced him to stay, but maybe his former security guard had known that, and didn’t want to be talked out of it. He’d made his mind uo. 

Dean didn’t know how he felt. There were too many emotions bubbling up at once and it overwhelmed his senses. He dropped his head into his hands and tugged at his hair, hyperventilating. He was confused. Pissed. Heartbroken. But what could he do about it? There was no way he was going to let Cas get away from him like this. Dean had done plenty of stupid things in his life, but he wasn’t going to let this be one of them.

He knew there would never be anyone else , because there never had been. And the idea that Cas hated himself so much that he was willing to throw away such a perfect thing killed Dean. He needed to show him he wasn’t giving up that easily. He was a stubborn son of a bitch.

So he let himself cry, let himself freak out and wonder what the hell had happened, but only for a little bit. He knew he didn’t have much time to fix this. 

Drying his tears with the back of his hand, Dean got up and threw his clothes on, then called his driver and told him to meet him at the hotel as soon as possible. He didn’t know where he was going. Cas already had a head start, so he probably couldn’t chase him to the hotel. He had to get ahead of him. So he’d go to the airport...but...that was public. As much as he didn’t want to lose Cas, he wasn’t ready to tell the whole world about them either. Sohe’d need to be creative. 

He chewed his lip, trying to think as he dashed out of the room and down the elevator, then out to the car. He remembered a leather goods store they’d passed on the way to the restaurant the other night and an idea began to form.

***

Cas was not handling this as well as he was hoping he would. He just had to get on the plane. He needed to go back to the motel and shower, get dressed and go. He had to go. But why? Why was he leaving?

He couldn’t remember.

He had to keep moving. One foot in front of the other. further and further from the hotel. His heart hurt and it felt like he couldn’t breathe. He couldn't stop the well of tears pouring out, and was grateful that a taxi finally pulled up, so he could get in and head back to the motel.

Cas hardly remembered getting back to his motel room; it all felt numbing and surreal. He climbed into the shower, washing himself down and cleaning off any remnants of Dean he had left. When his skin felt raw from scrubbing and his eyes dry and all cried out, he climbed out and dried himself down, settling in his all black security garb. it would be the least noticeable amongst others and all he wanted to do was blend, to disappear.

With his bags packed, he headed out to flag down a cab to go to the airport.

When he finally did wave a taxi down, he loaded his stuff inside the trunk. He slid into the backseat, shoving his earphones in to distract himself as he murmured the address of the airport, leaning against the window as he tried to convince himself this still was the right thing to do.

Cas arrived hours before his fight. But it was the best place for him to be. If he was here, he couldn't get to Dean.

He sat on the bench in the terminal, mindlessly watching the arrival and departure board as the flight numbers flipped through.  _ Delayed, on time, arriving soon, _ and all the people that walked by him: families, couples, lone travellers. All happy, excited to reach their destinations or to come home. And he craved for that same feeling instead of the empty, gaping dread he felt in the pit of his stomach. 

***

Dean had the driver drop him off outside the store and he walked in, looking around. His heart was racing as he walked over to the shop owner, clearing his throat.

“Excuse me, I’m looking for something I can give to...a friend. Like a journal. But a nice one.” He prayed that she spoke English.

“Ah yes, sir. I think I might have something.” She motioned him over to the counter and Dean breathed a sigh of relief.

She presented a caramel brown leather-bound notebook. “Authentic Italian leather,” she told him in a thick accent. It looked like possibly the most expensive thing in the store, except for maybe the briefcases. 

Dean nodded as he carefully flipped through the pages. It was perfect, bound with golden stitching along each edge and had crisp, ruler-lined pages, about five-hundred. A green satin ribbon was glued to the inside of the spine and draped over the center of the notebook as a bookmark. But it was still missing something. A personal touch. “Do you do engravings?”

“Yes, sir. Three to five business days.”

Dean chewed his lip. “How much can I pay you to have it done today?”

“By end of day?”

“No. Like...right now. How about...a thousand?”

She nodded reluctantly. “Give me half hour.”

“Okay. Thank you so much. Can you have it say Cas? That’s C-A-S.”

“This for a friend? Very special gift for a friend.”

“It’s for a uhm...” he trailed off and she lightly tapped his shoulder, giving him a knowing smile.

“I understand. Half hour. Come back.”

“Yes. Yes. Thank you so much.”

The thirty minute wait was excruciating for Dean. He spent it pacing around the store, wondering where Cas was...if he was too late and he was already gone. But he remembered that Cas didn’t like to be late for things. And if he was just heading to the airport...the flight probably wasn’t for another few hours. But he also wasn’t waiting for Dean to show up.

When it was finally ready, he couldn’t help himself. He threw his arms around the owner and hugged her tightly, thanking her over and over in both Italian and English. On the inside front cover,  _ Cas _ with a small heart beside his name was embossed into the leather. He hadn’t asked for the heart, but it was a nice touch. He paid for the notebook, giving an extra tip on top of the additional thousand he’d promised her, and headed to the car.

“Airport, please,” he instructed the driver, who gave him a weird look. “Just...trust me. I’ll make it back to my flight on time. But I need to do this.”

Reluctantly, the driver headed off and Dean opened the notebook. He couldn’t say anything to Cas out loud, so he’d just have to write a note. But words didn’t come easy to him, unless he was writing a song. So he pulled a pen out of his jacket pocket that he’d taken from the hotel, probably the same pen Cas had used to write the note, and held the cap between his teeth as he did just that. Wrote Cas a song, straight from the heart, that he hoped would be enough to convince him to stay.

Dean made it to the airport in record time, thanking his driver profusely. He’d finished the song. It was sloppy and needed work before he ever chose to perform it, but it was raw, a piece of his heart splayed onto the paper. He tucked the notebook safely into his jacket and zipped it up, heading inside the airport...which was possibly the worst place on earth for a celebrity to go unguarded. Aside from maybe a shopping mall.

Even with his hat and glasses on and his head down the entire time he walked, he could hear people calling out to him, snapping photos, begging for autographs. And he couldn’t resist, not wanting anyone to think that there was something off. So he signed plane ticket stubs and hats and shirts and put on his fakest smiles for selfies, then pressed on until he arrived at security. His next challenge…

“Ticket, sir?”

“I uh...don’t have one. I’m just here to talk to my friend.”

“Can’t let you go past here without a ticket...”

“Fine.” Dean groaned and turned around. He’d buy a fucking ticket if that’s what it took. So he ran over to the help desk, breathless. “Can I get a plane ticket? To...literally anywhere? LA?”

“Hey, aren’t you Dean-”

“Yes,” Dean replied in exasperation. “I just need a ticket, please.”

The worker seemed to take the hint. “From here to LA? Last minute? That’s...gonna be expensive, sir.”

“How much?” Dean groaned, fishing out his credit card and passing it over. “I don’t care. Just...get me a damn ticket, please.”

“We can get you a redeye. Leaves at midnight tonight.”

“Yeah, sure, whatever. I just need a ticket. Thank you.” He was met with a concerned look as the ticket was printed and handed to him, and he gave the attendant an apologetic, yet impatient smile as he took off for security 

He groaned as he was told he had to remove his jacket and shoes and go through the metal detector. He placed the notebook gingerly in one of the provided bins and stepped through, his eyes searching the airport for his wayward lover. 

***

Cas felt his phone buzz and he was tempted not to check. But maybe it was Gabriel just checking to make sure he had gotten to the airport alright. He fished out his phone, his Twitter notifications pinging.  _ Oh shit _ he still hadn’t turned off notifications with the hashtag "Dean Winchester."

He unlocked his phone, numerous tweets and photos popping up; one catching his attention.

Dean was at the airport? But- he had his private jet, Cas didn't understand. Was Dean there for him? Surely not. After that note, he thought he would never hear a peep from Dean. He stood up, looking around through the crowds of people.

His eyes landed on Dean and he felt his knees giving out and his whole world slowing.

After the whole ordeal of security, Dean finally made it through and his eyes landed on Cas. He walked straight for him, completely out of breath.

“Hey,” he said, bending over and placing his hands on his knees to try and catch his breath. He handed him the notebook, noting that everyone had turned around to stare at them.

“I just uh...wanted to give you something. That you...left.” He handed him the journal, rocking back and forth nervously on the balls of his feet.

Cas looked like a deer caught in headlights and it took him a moment to even register Dean had said anything to him. He hesitantly reached out and took the journal.

It clearly wasn't his. His had been destroyed, every page of his heart torn and broken. He swallowed thickly, turning the book over in his palm. There was a gold embossing of his name with a small heart beside it.

He rolled it back, his eyes moving to Deans for a moment before he opened it to the first page.

Dean smiled nervously. Having Cas read what he desperately wrote in front of hundreds of onlookers was completely nerve-wracking. He backed himself to a wall, standing against a column so he was at least partially blocked from view. A few people still stared, but eventually most lost interest after taking a few pictures.

_ Cas,  _

_ I don’t know what to say. I don’t know why you left or what made you think that it was a good idea. But I’m not ready to give you up just yet, and you’ll have to accept that. I’m not good at writing my feelings unless it’s in a song...so here’s something. I hope it says what it needs to. _

_ -Dean _

**_Love like This_ **

_ Oh darling you send shivers up my spine  _

_ Each time you smile, I feel so inclined  _

_ To press my body against yours  _

_ How long we’ll be here, I’m never sure  _

_ The way you hold me I think about for days  _

_ And the nights when I can no longer sleep  _

_ One name lingers upon my lips  _

_ How nothing else fills me with such bliss _

_ Let me stay here locked away with you  _

_ In our own secret paradise where no one has the key to  _

_ And let me hold you in my arms and show you I’m a better man because of you  _

_ But tell me where am I supposed to go  _

_ If kissing you feels like home  _

_ And what am I supposed to do  _

_ If I can no longer be with you _

_ I’m begging you to take my hand  _

_ And let me help you understand  _

_ That you complete the broken part of me I never knew how to fix  _

_ Just by loving me like this  _

_ Oh loving me like this  _

_ Before you my heart didn’t know how to love  _

_ I was barely scraping by  _

_ And though my mind said I needed to stop  _

_ I just couldn’t figure out why  _

_ You brought the butterflies  _

_ And I’m all out of lies  _

_ Or excuses to push you away  _

_ But now you’re slipping through my grasp  _

_ And I’ve decided I need you to stay  _

_ Your fingers laced with mine  _

_ Is the air that I breathe  _

_ But tell me where am I supposed to go  _

_ If kissing you feels like home  _

_ And what am I supposed to do  _

_ If I can no longer be with you _

_ I’m begging you to take my hand  _

_ And let me help you understand  _

_ That you complete the broken part of me I never knew how to fix  _

_ Just by loving me like this  _

_ I love you, Cas  _

Cas' eyes welled with tears again, shaking a little as he read the lyrics, each one etching deeper into his heart. Dean loved Cas; this wasnt a game to him. Each word rang truer and he could finally feel what Dean had been trying to say. He licked his lips, gently closing the book and tucking it into the pocket of his jacket. He looked around, his eyes landing on a stairwell door that was for personnel only.

"Come with me. Keep watch," he muttered, pulling his backpack over his shoulder and making a beeline to the door. Unlike Dean, Cas was someone people didn't tend to notice. He managed to pick the lock and nudged the door open as quietly as possible, swiftly stepping in. He wanted to talk openly with Dean without the threat of cameras or fans.

Dean nodded, relief flooding through him when Cas didn’t seem to be outwardly rejecting him. He looked back as they stepped into the closet, making sure no one had seen them go in.

Once they were finally alone, he let out a breath. “I need to tell you something.” He chewed his lip. It was dark in the closet and he searched for a light switch, wanting to look at him as he spoke. He pulled a chain on the ceiling and a dim yellow glow flooded the tiny room, but it was enough.

“Castiel Novak...” He took his hands, holding them tightly. “I love you, with every fiber of my being. With everything I have.”

"You know you could do so much better. So much better than me. I have no family, no money; I'm really not worth anything, Dean. Hell---I don't even have a job right now. I used to be a stripper; I didn't even finish college. You have such a bright future; you could find someone. Anyone else.

“Cas, I don’t care about any of that. I’ve never felt this way about anyone before. No one. I can’t just let this go. And how the hell is being with you gonna ruin my future? I’m still famous. My lifestyle isn’t going to change. But yours is. And as long as you’re okay with that, with having some spotlight on you, I am too. I don’t want to date a celebrity or someone with money. I want you. My future is only bright if you’re in it.”

Cas melted and he would kick himself later. Why was he always so self-sabotaging? Why did he never allow himself happiness? He always ran away when he felt a sliver of care from someone else. It was like that with Gabriel and now it was happening with Dean. "This is going to be hard. You know that, right?" He muttered, moving closer.

“I know. But I think it’s worth it. And you need to fucking learn that you deserve good things to happen to you. Your life will be better if you allow it to be, if you allow me to be in it.” Dean hadn’t let go of his hands. “If you get on that plane, Cas...well. I bought a ticket to LA. I assume that’s where you’re going. And I’ll be hours behind you, but I’m getting on that damn plane. I will chase you all over the world if I have to. I don’t care. Because...call me an idiot like you always do...but I think we’re made for each other.”

"You are an idiot, you---" Cas wanted to throttle him for being so stupidly stubborn. "Ugh." He huffed, grabbing the front of his jacket and pulling him into a kiss. It was their best form of communication. Words were not their forte and Cas couldn't vocalize how self-destructive he was, how this would be his indulgence.

Dean grinned as Cas seemingly gave up. He wrapped his arms around his waist and kissed him back, putting everything he could into that kiss. Pulling away breathlessly, he murmured, “this mean you’re coming with me to Ireland? Or do I need to keep groveling?”

"I'm coming with you to Ireland. You are a stubborn pain in my ass, you know that right?" He murmured, his fingers combing through Dean’s hair gently. "I need to change my plane ticket so I can meet you there.”

Dean chuckled. “Until you can learn to stop fucking things up for yourself, I’m gonna continue to be a pain in your ass.” He leaned into him, hugging him tightly. “I’m not ever letting you run away from me. Okay?” He kissed his cheek. “And now your ass is gonna have to fly coach instead of my cushy private jet, thanks to your stupidity.” He smirked. “I’ll get your ticket changed.”

Cas rolled his eyes. "How are you going to deal with your take off without your cock in my mouth hm?" He teased lightly, a heavy weight lifting off his chest. "Thank you." He pulled back to allow Dean to leave the shady-ass closet.

“I dunno, Cas. I guess I’ll have to put it in someone else’s mouth.” Dean shook his head, giving him another quick kiss before he left. Not once did he complain how gross it was to be in there. He put his shades back on, looking around to make sure no one was nearby.

Cas waited a decent amount of time before he followed suit, leaving the closet and leaning up against one of the nearby pillars. He fidgeted with his zipper quietly as he waited for Dean. 

Dean took Cas’ ticket back over to the front desk, removing his sunglasses. “Hey, it’s me again. I uh...have a favor to ask. Can I get a refund on my LA ticket and can I get another ticket changed?”

“Where to?”

“Uh, Ireland.”

“And is this for you?”

“No. It’s for...one of my employees.” He handed over the ticket.

“Normally, the answer would be no, but I might be able to make an exception for you.”

Dean sighed. “How much?”

“No money. But I’d like an autograph for my daughter. She’s a huge fan.”

“Okay, no problem. I’ll personalize it if you can make his ticket first class.” Dean smiled and grabbed a sharpie off the desk, signing for the agent.

“Sure thing, Mr. Winchester. Have a nice day.”

“Thanks. You too.” Dean headed back over to Cas with the new ticket. “Got you first class. You owe me when we get there.”

"Thanks." Cas stood up and smiled. His eyes darted around before he dropped his voice so only Dean could hear him. "Perhaps if you give me your hotel room address, I can meet you there. And maybe to pay you back for the ticket, I will take some...explicit photos for you."

“Will do.” Dean grinned. He wanted to kiss him goodbye, but instead he just waved. “I’ll see you tonight.” With a longing smirk shot in Cas’ direction, he headed out of the airport, exhilarated. This day had truly been insane and now he had a long flight. He met his driver back in the limo and headed off to a separate part of the airport where his plane was. He’d done it. And as exhausting as it was, he’d do it as many times as he needed to until Cas was convinced that they were good for each other. 


End file.
